welcome to part 1 of jiro milks her brain dry for updates

—jiro
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"hey minseul," boo called, "next time, please don't take me to a mental hospital again. that shit was hella creepy. i mean did you see......" he instantly trailed off, not bothering to finish his sentence because he was just looking outside.

"see what?"

"......."

"earth to boo seungkwan?" i nudged the boy "see what?"

"nothing," he laughed it off. as someone who's been with seungkwan for like, five centuries now, i know when he's acting weird. and this time, well, it's really obvious. jihoon and wonwoo didn't bother paying attention to it though. the two of them are already minding their own business as soon as we got to a place to eat.

"no shit bro," jihoon mumbled as he scrolled through his phone, "there's this kind of flu going around. maybe that's why i'm sick, don't you think?"

"hm? what kind of flu?"

"how am i supposed to know? it already 'flu' away," jihoon answered and started laughing out loud. yeah, as if he just told the biggest joke of all time. wonwoo had a concerned look on his face as he stared at jihoon, then he averted his gaze to me. "minseul, he's possessed. i feel it."

"i feel it too."

"hey, don't go talking about me while i'm here," the smaller grouched

"okay," wonwoo said with a nod, followed by small raise of his hand pointing to the door. "you can leave, jihoon, so we can continue to talk about you."

the younger wasn't happy about it, so he just crossed his arms and did an eye roll. typical jihoon. it took a while before our orders were placed on the table and we started to dig onto the plates. seungkwan was quiet the whole time while jihoon kept complaining about his food. it all feels weird, how only wonwoo and i are the only sane ones in the group. i mean, nobody is ever sane in seventeen and that's completely understandable, but it just feels different this time.

"i don't want this anymore," jihoon pushed his plate to the side "i'm done."

wonwoo slid jihoon's plate back in front of him. "you have to eat, you need something in your stomach," wonwoo tells jihoon, but the boy really isn't in the mood for anything.

"don't force him, wonwoo."

"okay."

for the whole ride back to soonyoung's house, jihoon wouldn't stop blabbering about wanting to eat fruits dipped in ketchup. for fucking real, wonwoo and i are just done with him. to add to the weirdness, on the way, seungkwan told us to drop him off by his apartment so he could get some rest.

wonwoo was the last to hop off the cab we got so jihoon and i waited for him. "yo what's up with kwan? did you see that? he was being so out of character," wonwoo whispered

"yeah," i replied looking for the house keys "but let's give him the rest he needs. poor boy must be so tired after getting stuck inside an elevator. i would want to have some rest too."

"i still want fruits," jihoon mumbled

"ah, i don't know if soonyoung has some fruits inside—"

"then buy some for me."

i stopped to look at jihoon for a few seconds before turning the key and opening the door. "jihoon, i'm not your servant or anything, okay? i'm not here to do everything for you." when we stepped inside of the house, chan came to greet us and jihoon just walked past him.

"oh," the youngest frowned "is it ignore lee chan day today?"

"no!" i ran all the way to the boy to give him a hug, "it's love and appreciate lee chan everyday!" the boy giggled and hugged me tighter, to the point where he could already lift me up.

"wow is it cheat on soonyoung day today?" we heard someone say. chan immediately pulled away from the hug and gave soonyoung a sly smile.

"that's so funny hyung, coming from you," the youngest muttered. and in an instant, soonyoung's expression changed into a nervous one. chan walked past him and whispered something that was too soft for me to hear, but i'm sure i heard jihoon's name in there.

"what was that about?"

"n-nothing," soonyoung mumbled "what happened with you guys by the way? where's boo?"

"back at his place. he said he's tired and needs some sleep,l" wonwoo answered for me. the boys and i make our way to the living room when we heard a loud thump coming from the kitchen.

"yo shit was that some kind of burglar or something?!" hansol panicked, soonyoung and junhui both ran to check the kitchen while minghao and i followed. and there we saw a thief.

a fruit thief, apparently.

"jihoon what the actual fuck is up?" jun laughed at the boy who just fell from his chair while soonyoung helped him get up. don't worry, jun didn't just laugh there. he helped too

"yeah ji, are you like, hung?"

"bro that's gay why would you ask that?" junhui tells soonyoung

"no, like, hungover."

"oh. thought you meant something else."

"what else would it mean?"

jun bit his lip to stop laughing while soonyoung's confused expression stayed on his face. minghao, who was next to me, rolled his eyes and went over to junhui to twist the boy's ear, causing him to let go of jihoon. the poor boy landed on the ground again and minghao couldn't care less.

"there you go again with your mind, wen junhui, i'm sick of it."

"hao, jihoon literally fell back down and you're still— ouch what the fuck let go!" jun shouted as minghao dragged him outside by the ear. i watched soonyoung grab jihoon back up but the younger just pushed him off and tried to get up by himself.

"what were you doing? looking for fruit?" i chuckled

"it ain't funny, minseul, i'm just craving for fruit with ketchup, what about it!?"

"fruit with ketchup?" soonyoung asked "hoonie that's a weird combination."

"shut the fuck up, i wasn't asking for your opinion," the boy stormed off, leaving soonyoung and i in the kitchen, with hansol just right by the doorframe, eavesdropping.

"uh is jihoon hyung pregnant or something?"

"no fucking way bro, that's not happening," soonyoung replied with a laugh "maybe it's that flu going around. saw it on the news today."

"what? some flu that just magically makes people crave for fruits dipped in ketchup?" i asked "look, if someone is sick and hungry as hell, it might not be too severe, but there's a chance it may be a contagious sickness."

"EW WE HAVE A BACTERIA BREAKOUT IN HERE! FUCK!" hansol started screaming, causing all the boys to freak out too. in seconds, it was pure chaos. when i got to the living room, they were running around and panicking, running around on the sofas and table.

everyone was being loud, ESPECIALLY seokmin. you know it's both bad and good when he hits like, a fucking G#7 leaving mariah carey jobless. it's good because seokmin's voice sounds heavenly. but bad, for soonyoung's windows can break because the loudness of seokmin's voice has a massive effect on the extent it displaces air molecules. who knows? it could match with the resonant frequency of soonyoung's windows and we could all be covered in glass shards any fucking time soon.

"WHY ARE WE SCREAMING?" mingyu shouted

"I DONT KNOW EVERYONE STARTED SCREAMING SO NOW IM SCREAMING TOO!" jun shouted back at the boy. i was so overwhelmed with the situation to even function and try to stop them, so i was relieved when i saw that seungcheol was actually trying to calm the boys down.

"STOP IT! EVERYONE! SHUT UP!"

in an instant, the boys started to behave. seungcheol was pinching the bridge of his nose as we all waited for him to say something. "what the fuck was that? why did everyone start screaming?" he asked

"jihoon has salmonella infection," hansol muttered, then all the boys LITERALLY moved away from the blonde.

"what? me? i have that?" jihoon couldn't believe it, "minseul, i have an infection?"

"w-what? i don't know, i'm not a doctor."

"isn't that contagious? we really need to take him to a doctor, and not doyoung because he's probably smoking weed right now or something," jeonghan suggested

"it's okay jihoon i'll still stay with you—"

"soonyoung hyung you're gross, get the fuck away from us," mingyu pushed soonyoung away.

"yeah bro he fucking sneezes on me. do i look like a tissue to you?" hansol added

"okay enough, jihoon doesn't have a salmonella infection. it was just a guess, don't trust me about that," i threw my hands up before walking over to jihoon to grab his arm. but the boy dodged it and showed his tongue out.

"no, i have salmonella infection and i'm claiming it so nobody can get close to me! nobody's taking me to a doctor to get treated either!!" jihoon announced

"what the fuck, people can die from that. you're into that shit?" minghao questioned "absolutely disgusting, don't touch my camera or any of my things ever again."

"how does it transmit?" chan asked "i'm nervous i don't wanna die young."

"is it an airborne disease? i don't know," i mumbled "maybe, but we don't really know. let's not assume things in here, people. i just know for sure that it can be transmitted when you share food or drinks or if you kiss that person or something."

"interesting," jun nodded, looking at soonyoung

"stop looking at me, what the fuck."

"alright, jihoon, you're going to the doctor," seungcheol ordered

"no! i'm not going! i love this kind of life!" jihoon shouted and ran to the bedroom, locking himself inside.

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turns out there's no curse hhhhh jk we aint sure about that folks.
anyway, check my visual book caratland hee hee kbyeilu

— jiro