Davide was looking at the woman kneeling in front of him, stroking his dick, licking it as if by doing so she was going to receive some award. Best in Oral, he thought. Though she was not the best he's had.

"You like that, baby?" tanong nito.

It was so-so but he nodded and touched her cheek. This woman in particular did not know how to roleplay. Kanina pa niya sinukuan ang kanilang laro, ang tanging dahilan kung bakit nagkasama sila ng babaeng ito. He had his own kink and the woman seemed willing to grant him his wish. But she was bad at it. Horrible. One-star.

She was supposed to be a simple woman who wanted a piece of him, an ordinary man and not Davide Castillejo. It was his favorite role. He wanted to be an anonymous man. He fantasized of a simple girl who wanted him for who he was, not for what he had to offer. There was nothing that pleased him more than someone liking him for him, and not his money or influence.

"Would you like to ride me, babe?" tanong niya sa babae.

"With pleasure, my love."

How he hated her reply. She was the kind of woman who faked everything—from her eyelashes, to her tits, to her orgasms. How can a woman want to ride a man without any proper foreplay? She was in it for the cash, or the influence. Sa mundong ito kung saan mahalaga ang impluwensiya, madaming babaeng handang gawin ang lahat para makuha iyon. Like this woman for example. She was willing to have sex with him without taking any pleasure for herself. She was probably thinking that that was going to please him, but it was an insult, in fact.

"Lay on the bed," aniya.

"But I want to ride you."

"Go lay on the bed," ulit niya.

Ngumiti ito at naglakad patungo sa kama. Bago pumuwesto doon ay nagtanong ito, "Would you want me to be on my knees or what?"

Just fucking let me give you an orgasm, what the hell is wrong with you? gusto sana niyang sabihin pero napigilan niya ang sarili. Nilapitan niya ang babae at bahagyang itinulak nang mapahiga ito sa kama. He pulled her leg to him, and started stroking her clit.

Soon, the woman was no longer faking it. "I'm gonna come, Daddy."

What the actual fuck? Davide lost his erection that was barely there to begin with. Still, he kept rubbing her clit, inserting his finger deep inside of her.

"Daddy, I'm coming. Oh, daddy, I give it to me. Fuck me, daddy."

Muntikan nang mapangiwi si Davide. He was not into kink shaming but if there was one thing he can't stand, it was this. Hindi niya maiwasang maisip na ang nasa isip ng babaeng nakapikit at malapit nang manginig ay ang sariling ama. Sino ang gaganahan sa ganoon? Well, maybe some men, but not him. His fantasies were never as wild as others', he supposed.

"Oh, Daddy, I won't tell Mommy! I'm coming! Oh! Oh! Oh, daddy!"

Nag-mental note siyang i-block ang numero ng babae sa kanyang phone. He had no time for her. Masyadong madaming babae ang gusto siyang makasama. The last thing he needed was an erection killer like this one.

Pumihit ang babae, tumuwad sa kama. "Come, give it to me, Daddy," nakangising sabi nito.

"Some other time, Taylor."

"Oh, what's wrong?"

"Nothing. I just remembered I have to do something." Tumuloy siya sa shower at naligo, saka muling lumabas para magbihis.

"I can suck you off. You didn't finish." Mayroong pag-aalala sa mukha ng babae.

Sa isang banda, gusto niyang maawa rito. Why was she that worried that he didn't finish? What was at stake? "What do you want, Taylor?"

"Nothing. Just let me please you the way you pleased me."

"I mean what do you want from me? This might be your only chance to tell me so go right ahead. I have a couple of minutes to spare."

Saglit na nag-alangan ito pero sa huli ay sinabi, "I was hoping you'd recommend me to be your company's endorser."

He was no surprised at all. "Which company?"

"The new one. The one that makes the feminine wash."

"Ah." Tumango siya. "If you won't be the face of it, I'll make sure you're in the commercial."

"But can't you insist I be the face of it? The face of your brand," giit ng babae.

"But you're not it, Taylor, I don't think. I'm sorry." He had to be blunt. This woman had to understand that she can't fuck her way to success at all times.

Mukhang hindi nito inasahan ang kanyang sinabi. "After you took advantage of me, you're gonna tell me I'm too ugly to promote your brand? How dare you!"

"Oh, please, don't go there." He was bored with her. Bago pa kung ano ang kanyang masabi ay nagsimula na siyang magbihis.

"No one can please you like I did."

"I didn't even come, what the hell are you talking about?" aniya habang isinasara ang butones ng pantalon.

"Bastard! You used me. You only used me."

Walang pasensiya si Davide sa mga ganitong klaseng tao. "Shut up, will you? I didn't force you to sleep with me. You volunteered. You're the one who used me. I was willing to put you in that commercial, but that's not enough for you." Ibinutones na niya ang pang-itaas. "You wanted to be the face of the product, even if you're not it. I was being honest, my dear. What I said doesn't mean you're ugly because we both know you're hot. You're just not the face of my brand."

"Then make me!"

"You want me to fund your cosmetic surgery for a lousy non-fuck? Nah." Malapit na siyang mapikon sa puntong iyon. Naupo siya at isinuot ang medyas.

"How dare you! Cosmetic surgery? Why?! Am I not pretty enough? You saw me, all of me. How can you say I still need surgery?"

Paulit-ulit lang ang sinasabi ng babae. May problema ito sa self-esteem, o sa pang-unawa. Bakit ba niya pinatulan pa ang isang tulad nito? "You don't have the look that the brand needs."

"Can't you just do me a small favor, please—"

"Honey, don't beg," aniya. "You're not it. End of story. Go take a shower and leave. I will tell them to put you in that ad, but not as the face of the brand. Goodbye." Lumabas na siya sa silid at hinanap ang katiwala niya, si Manong Fidel. Nagbilin siya ritong may babaeng paalis. Sanay na si Mang Fidel sa lahat ng iyon. Taylor will receive a special token, even if she did not deserve it. There was a special space in that place for all his gifts and extra clothing and toiletries for all the women who might need to change.

That was his life. That had been his life for years. He was only trying to be kind to the ladies. Ano na lang ba ang isang bote ng mamahaling alak bilang token of appreciation? Ang lugar na iyon ang pribadong space niya. He had two bedrooms there, one for his women, the other for his art. How he loved painting. Sadly, there was no place in his life for something so silly and probably won't make money at all.

Nagtungo na siya sa opisina. He will be the youngest CEO the company had ever seen. Sa kanya mapupunta ang puwesto dahil na rin sa desisyon ng kanyang kapatid na mag-asawa noon. He was trying to prove himself. Malapit nang magretiro ang kanyang ama bago siya ikasal, sa kanya na ipapasa ang puwesto. Currently, he was vice president for operations. Nakuha niya ang posisyon nang magretiro ang dating VP. Before that, he worked directly under him, learning every single day, making sure he was working harder than everyone else.

Hindi niya maiwasang madama na kailangan niyang patunayan sa lahat na kaya siyang pagkatiwalaan ng ama para sa isang napakahalagang posisyon sa kompanya. He knew that his father did not think he was good enough. He never felt he was, growing up in their home. Alam niyang malaking disappointment sa kanyang mga magulang ang ginawa ng kanyang kapatid. Time and again, he would still hear his father say that that incident was the biggest disappointment of his life. It was not even his life. Ano na lang ang mararamdaman niya patungkol doon? Of course, that made him feel like crap.

Ginawa niya ang lahat ng makakaya para mapatunayan sa ama na hindi ito nawalan nang mag-asawa ang kanyang kapatid. He was determined to make him see he was the son he wanted, and not just an accident he had no other choice but to deal with since he was already there.

Nang matapos ang meeting ay tumuloy siya sa Barangay Halcon. He would find himself there time and again. Noong kabataan nilang magkakabarkada ay naging parusa nilang lahat ang magkaroon ng community project sa Halcon. Since then, the place had been a part of their lives.

How can they all forget Halcon when it was the place where they all got to know each other better and somehow, at least on his part, realized that he shouldn't feel all that bad about what he didn't have at home because all things considered, he was still lucky compared to so many people. Tinubuan siya ng hiya sa Halcon. Itinuro ng Halcon sa kanya na mayroong mas nakahihigit na kahulugan ang buhay.

Barangay Halcon used to be a slum area, until they came there and helped the people find better ways to live. Sa Halcon nakatira sina Analuz at Tranq. He never realized just how hard life was for his friend until he saw the surroundings he lived in. Madaming tao sa Halcon ang namumuhay sa simpleng paraan na ang tanging goal ay ang mag-survive sa araw-araw. Once they realized this, they made it a point to help the people. Unti-unti nila iyong ginawa, sa tulong ng kanya-kanyang pamilya. In the end, Halcon became more livable. Sa ngayon ay isa iyon sa pinakamalinis na barangay sa Maynila.

No one would think that he often went there to find solace, to think. Nasa gitna iyon ng Maynila at ang daan patungo sa Halcon ay hindi tulad ng nakasanayan niyang mga lugar. Pero kapag bumungad na siya sa area ay napapanatag siya. There were days when the roads leading to it were chaotic but no matter how congested the tiny roads were, he always looked forward to arriving at Halcon. Para bang sinasabi ng lugar sa kanya na kahit ano pa ang pagdaanan niya, palaging sa huli ay may magagawa siyang paraan para maging maayos ang lahat.

Pinindot niya ang alarm system nang tumapat ang sasakyan sa isang mataas na gate. Automatic ang gate na agad bumukas. Ipinarada niya ang sasakyan at bumaba. The place was huge but the housing project their group funded years ago was still taller. Nasa likod iyon ng bahay nilang magkakaibigan. They called their house "The Halcon House" and the building behind it was called "Halcon Housing Project." May sariling daan papasok sa HHP.

Halos lahat sila ay beinte-uno anyos nang simulan ang Project Halcon, ang housing and development project sa barangay, dahil karamihan sa kanila ay nakuha ang trust fund nang ganoong edad. It was a business venture that all their families disapproved of, but it was their money and their first shot at doing something big.

The housing project was not a skyscraper. It was a building with seven floors. Maliliit man ang units sa building ay mas maayos iyon kumpara sa dating fire hazard na bahayan. Sa ibaba ng gusali ay mayroong mga paupahang puwesto na puno na ngayon, may convenience store, fast food restaurant, at mga opisina. Ang bawat unit at binabayaran ng mga bumili sa Pag-ibig. Sure, the money they spent on the project could've earned them prime bucks had they invested on something else, but this was their passion project.

Pumasok na siya sa loob ng bahay. Nandoon si Manang Linda, ang katiwala nila sa bahay at tiyahin ni Analuz. Agad itong ngumiti.

"Hindi ko narinig ang pagdating mo," anito. "Nagyu-yutsub kasi ako. 'Ku, maitabi nga muna itong selpon na itong peste sa buhay ko't mula nang bigyan ako ng anak ko'y naadik na ako sa panonood." Humalakhak ang matanda. "Ay, wala naman 'kakong gumagamit ng waypay dito kaya sige ako sa panood dito. Ah, talaga namang enjoy na enjoy ako. Naloko na 'kako, pag-uwi ko'y malungkot at walang waypay."

Natawa si Davide. "Eh 'di dito na lang kayo palagi, Manang."

"Kung ako lang, walang problema. Ayoko na ngang umuwi, sa totoo lang." Ang bahay nito ay ilang hakbang lang din mula sa bahay. May sariling property ang pamilya, kahit maliit.

"O, bakit naman, Manang?" Malapit siya sa matanda. Palibhasa ay hindi siya naging malapit sa sariling ina, si Manang ang nakita niyang mother figure. She was a jolly old lady who always had something to say.

"'Ku, paano iyong asawa kong magaling, wala nang ginawa kundi bulungan akong bilhan siya ng Viagra!"

Kung may iniinom na tubig si Davide, malamang na nabuga niya iyon. "Si Manong, gustong mag-Viagra? O, bakit naman ayaw ninyo, Manang? Baka mamaya, masundan pa ang bunso ninyo."

"Lokong bata ito, ah." Bahagya siya nitong tinampal sa dibdib, kasabay ng isang irap. "Ang akin, kung ayaw nang paganahin ni Lord, 'wag nang ipagpilitan. Isa pa, wala naman siyang iba nang gagawin ngayon kundi mag-alaga ng mga apo. Aanhin pa niya? Kung ako lang ang inaalala niya, naku, matagal nang natuyot ang dati'y karagatan."

Tawang-tawa si Davide. "Si Manang talaga!"

Tumawa rin ito. "Aba'y totoo lang. 'Wag kang mainip at siguradong susunod ka rin sa yapak ng manong mo. Alam mo naman ang lalaki, kapag nawawala ang tikas ng pagkalalaki, eh, kung ano-ano na ang naiisip gawin. Kunsabagay, matagal ka pa naman siguro. Baka nga ikaw pa ang huling mag-asawa sa mga kaibigan mo."

Tumango na lang siya at hindi sinabi sa matanda ang tungkol sa nalalapit na kasal kay Janet. Paano niya ipapaliwanag sa matanda ang kanyang sitwasyon? Siguradong hindi nito maiintindihan. Even his friends did not understand. How can they when they all probably believed in romantic love? What a strange idea.

"Bueno, kumain ka na ba?"

"Hindi pa nga po, eh."

"Siya, iinitin ko ang ulam."

He felt at home. Mas komportable siya sa lugar na iyon kaysa sa sarili niyang tahanan. He doubted if he will ever find a place that made him feel that way in the all of the world. Halcon was not his second home; it was his first. 

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