You Smirk More Than Draco Malfoy
(A/N): The original publishing date was in April, so some of the dates and events are a little off.
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Elizabeth posted a status
Okay, so we have a couple questions... *smirks evilly* -with Nico di Angelo
Nico: ... Who is this "we" you're talking about?
Elizabeth: Oh, just a couple friends of mine...
Nico: Why do I feel so uncomfortable?
Leo: ... I think it's the "smirking evilly", but maybe that's just me
Elizabeth: *coughs* Shut up Leo, or you're next
Leo: Aw, you love me rea-
Elizabeth: *raises eyebrow*
Leo: Oh look, time to... uh, make a... uh, amazing present for the just-as-amazing-if-not-more Elizabeth? For her... uh, birthday?
Elizabeth: My birthday was a month ago
Leo: IT SHALL BE A BELATED SWEET SIXTEEN PRESENT THEN. Because turning sixteen is so great, your present deserves to be just as great, therefore it took a little longer to make.
Leo: *high fives self* I got this
Elizabeth: ...
Leo: *coughs* Anyway. Gotta go!
Leo has logged off
Everyone: ...
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Elizabeth posted a status
Anyway, the first question is a typical question that really tells nothing about a person's character:
What is your favorite color?
Nico: The color of my soul.
Elizabeth: You can't pick a color that doesn't exist, Nico
Nico: Wait...
Nico: Did you just indirectly hint that I don't have a soul?
Elizabeth: ... Yes
Nico: Wow, thanks. I feel so loved.
Elizabeth: Anytime!
Nico: Oh, and it's black.
Elizabeth: So it's like your heart
Nico: Well isn't someone just being such a flatterer today
Elizabeth: Always
Annabeth: Aww, RIP Alan Rickman
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Elizabeth posted a status
Are you coming out with your love of Harry Potter? After all this time? -Annabeth
Annabeth: Always
Elizabeth: ...
Annabeth: ...
Thalia: Is it too late to leave with the Hunters instead of opting to stay in camp?
Thalia: I don't need to be here when they start squealing and fangirling together
Elizabeth: ...
Annabeth: ...
Thalia: Time to find my earbuds.
*cue two loud in-sync squeals*
Thalia: And there goes my eardrums
Leo: Not like all that blasting punk rock music didn't take them away already
Thalia: ...
Leo: ...
Thalia: Do you really want to do this right now?
*cue more squeals in the background that might as well be in their ears*
Leo: ... *winces* No, not really
Thalia: Thought so
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Elizabeth posted a status
Oh, look, another question. This one's good... *smirks*
Nico: Oh gods
Elizabeth: ... Have you ever read Harry Potter?
Nico: ... No
Elizabeth: Oh really? Hm, well. What do you think about the term Death Eaters?
Nico: Ew. why would anyone would eat Thanatos?
Elizabeth: Right... So why haven't you read it?
Nico: It sounds overrated
Elizabeth: Well, now the fandom's going to get you. Have fun.
Elizabeth: Although tbh, I'm mostly in the fandom because the books I really like usually aren't books suitable for a "fandom" so I just go to other series I've read.
Elizabeth: Wait, I probably should not have admitted that in a fanfic-
Nico: STOP BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL
Elizabeth: Oh... right... We've broken that a long time ago
Leo: Wait... This is a fanfiction???
Elizabeth: ...
Nico: Look what you've done
Elizabeth: Haha... April Fool's?
Leo: Oh... Wow... That was an elaborate prank...
Elizabeth: Yeah, I definitely didn't think it would work
Leo: Right, I'll just go now
Leo has logged off
Nico: *slow claps* Niiice
Elizabeth: Hey, whatever works
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Elizabeth posted a status
Ugh, why did I ever decide to exist during allergy season?
Thalia: Sorry Elizabeth, I don't think you can just choose to stop existing
Elizabeth: Whyyy *cries*
Annabeth: Aw, and none of the Apollo healing stuff works?
Elizabeth: Nope, I tried that already
Piper: So I guess allergy medicine didn't work either?
Elizabeth: *scowls* I can't. I'm at home right now because it's the school year and my mom's a big believer in "natural remedies"
Annabeth: Ouch, what sorts of natural remedies
Elizabeth: Some sort of ginger thing that burns my throat, pills that make me want to throw up because acid reflux is such a joy, and other sorts of things like that
Elizabeth: You know. Asian mom things
Everyone: ...
Elizabeth: Never mind, you probably don't know
Thalia: So how bad are your allergies this year?
Elizabeth: It's terrible. I don't even know why, it's not even warm yet.
Elizabeth: But my eyes are dry and itchy. One is little infected while the other has a slightly swollen eyelid. Plus cold sores. And itchy throat. And of course, the stuffy nose. Oh, and the joyful grogginess and zombie-esque habits that comes along with allergies? DID I MENTION I HAVE PINK EYE TOO? NO? WELL I BLOODY DO UGH.
Piper: ... Wow
Elizabeth: And it's April! So homework is akdlhflahdfio. Tests are AIDFHOADFIOAOIGHOIAEVBIABE. And I just want to curl up in my bed and just be the sniveling mess that I am without needing to pass as a functioning human in the eyes of a judgmental society.
Everyone: ... Wow
Nico: Wait, so does this mean I'm free from questioning?
Elizabeth: ... *sighs* Yes
Elizabeth: Well, until next time. *smirks*
Nico: ...
Nico: You smirk more than Draco Malfoy
Elizabeth: WAIT, WHA-
fin.
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(A/N): Someone stage an intervention for me. My dad is seriously considering voting for Donald Trump. *shields ears as I hear him watching his debates at this very moment*
Goals for Chapter: Seventy reads, eighteen votes, thirteen comments
Sneak Peek Title: Reading the Books and All the Drama From That
I have officially decided to stick to my original plan of updating on Tuesdays and Fridays only. For now, Tuesday updates do not require meeting the goal. Goals are simply just that. Goals. I figured it would make sneak peeks and information to be less confusing and that way I can also stay ahead of updating a little longer.
-Elizabeth
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