Dan takes my phone out of my hand and lays it on the table. My brother and me are staring at me, innocent faces, a memory from careless times. The shape of my face is softer than his. Greg must have been on his knees, he always towered over me, but in the picture, our faces are at the same level. The only other differences are the length of our hair and the color of our eyes. My eyes are dark brown, almost black, his were sparkling green. I keep staring at it until the screen turns black.

"I'm so sorry, Elise." He holds my hand, slowly stroking it with his thumb.

"Don't be. It's not your fault he's dead." The words come out sharper than I had in mind. "Sorry, I never expected to see that photo."

"You really should try to avoid the media, especially if this sets you off." He wipes away some unnoticed tear from my cheek. I thought I had caught them all.

I tug at the sheets. "It's okay. I'll live with it"

"Eli, please. You only have to wait for it. Those pictures are out only a few hours.  You don't want to read the websites of my fans at this moment." He's quiet for a couple of seconds. "How did your brother die exactly, if I may ask?"

I cringe. My body stiffens in his arms, and I pinch my lips. There's nothing on the website about the cause of Greg's death. One lonely phrase says something about a tragic accident. I stay silent, hoping he will let it rest.

"Wow, what happened to him that you react like this?" His hands glide over my shoulders, rubbing them as if he tries to loosen my stiffened muscles.

"It's just... he didn't die a peaceful death." I finally say.

"I'm so sorry to hear that." His arms rest around my shoulders.

I try to gather as much confidence as possible before I speak again. "It was a stupid accident."

A stupid fatal accident. The image of my brother heaving his last breath, after suffering from severe convulsions and a screaming Megan at his side is hard to forget. If I hadn't been so selfish, he would still be alive. But I push it away, far away.

"It's okay, Eli. One day you will tell me everything." If he holds me any closer, we would have to become one being. His tight grip is soothing me. I concentrate on his steady breathing, making the rhythm mine.

"I will, I promise, but can we please talk about something else?" My voice sounds shivery and frail to my ears. "What's going to happen now?" I ask, closing my eyes to get rid of the last shards of my memories.

"I think you should take a shower, relax a bit. Jonathan will be here soon and then we will make some decisions." He plants a soft kiss on my temple.

"Are you coming with me?" I ask.

He smiles. "I don't think that's a good idea. I don't want Jonathan to walk in on us. The situation is awkward enough already. And I have some phone calls to answer."

His phone has been buzzing incessantly the whole time. Mine lit up several times as well. When I check my phone, I see that my parents both called me. The joy of being a child of separated parents. Now I have to call them both to fill them in about my love life. My friends send me texts, asking what's going on. I will deal with that later.

"Okay." I take my clothes from my small suitcase and walk to the shower.

X-x-x-x-x-x-x-

When I come back into the room, there's a man sitting on the couch. Dan's facing him, sitting next to him. The man's talking, using big gestures and he doesn't look too happy.

"I need you to act a bit more professional, Dan. These activities have been planned for months and your actions brought everyone in an awkward position." The man clenches his jaw. "Your girlfriend is the first thing people ask about, the movie comes second. I don't have to tell you the film studio isn't too happy about that."

I feel like an intruder, but I guess I have to be part of this conversation as well.

"Hello."

The simple greeting makes their gazes turn to me. The man offers me his hand. I think I saw him last night at the premiere, but I didn't speak to him. "You must be the girl everyone is talking about. I'm Jonathan, Dan's agent."

His handshake is firm, the smile on his face doesn't reach his steel-gray eyes.

"Elise. Nice to meet you." I try to meet his grace with confidence.

"I wish I had known that there were things going on between you two. We could have slowly introduced you to the public. This relationship thing was a bit of a surprise." Jonathan looks accusingly at Dan.

I try to defend him. "Don't be too hard on him. We were alone on the rooftop, we thought we had some privacy."

A dry laugh leaves Jonathan's mouth. "Dan should have known better. It was a party and there was press around. He took a risk and he knew it. How long is this going on between the two of you?"

"A couple of weeks," Dan says. "I thought it was a bit early to introduce her to you."

"And now it's a bit too late." Jonathan takes a sip from his glass of water. "I have to fill in Elise about how she has to handle the press and we don't have much time."

"What?" I'm unpleasantly surprised. Me handling the press? The thought alone makes me feel like I'm choking.

Jonathan sighs. "Both your flights are leaving within three hours. You're going back to your place, Dan has to fulfill his obligations to-"

"Wait, Jonathan, can't she come with me?" Dan says.

"Dan, really?" Jonathan looks like a tired parent. "If we had known that you two had the hots for each other, we could have arranged something, but now it's simply too late."

"Okay, Elise," Jonathan turns to me, looking me straight in the eyes. "I'm sorry it has to be this way. My main concern is Dan and I'm not letting you destroy his career. Am I clear?"

I nod, although I don't want to. I want to give this prick some quirky reply, but I find myself dumbstruck. Who does he think he is? The notion of me destroying Dan's career sounds ridiculous.

Jonathan gives me a basic course "How to handle the press", which actually comes down to "Don't hit anyone, even if they're annoying the crap out of you". He doesn't tell me anything I couldn't have figured out myself, and I'm annoyed. I have a life as well, and I don't want to walk through several rows of journalists, paparazzi, or whatever they are called, every time I go outside.

"Don't even think about sharing anything with the press, because I will drag you to court." It seems like Jonathan finally is done talking. How is it possible that someone made me feel bad in less than ten minutes?

I scrape my throat, trying to gather courage.

"There's something I want to ask you -  I'm moving places in a week or so," I say.

"Good for you!" Jonathan says, but he doesn't sound excited, and he turns to Dan. "Is this the announcement that you're going to live together?"

"No, I'm moving for an internship." I try to give him my severest stare. "What do I tell my employer?"

Jonathan starts to laugh. "I wouldn't worry about it. In a week they probably forgot all about you. That's how it works."

"Please do explain, because this is all new to me."

"Okay. Today you're news, and you probably will be tomorrow, but the day after someone else does something stupid, or there's a new vid of a cute kitten and you know what? They will all forget about you. You're moving next week? That's great, but no one cares. At least the press won't."

Jonathan checks his watch. "It's time to leave. Snuggle a bit one last time, I promise I won't look and then it's time to go!"

And with those words, he leaves the room.

"Are you okay?" Dan hugs me. This is all overwhelming to me. I want to run, leave this mess behind. What have I gotten myself into this time?

"I guess so." 

Dan's face is close to mine, and I search for any sign if I should be worried about him as well. Jonathan's words sting. It feels like I'm condemned for a crime, and I'm not sure what I did wrong. The warm fuzzy memory of last night is already fading, growing cold, with the photo's as the only proof.

He fumbles with a keyring and takes several keys off. "Here, take these. They're from my house. If stuff gets too weird around your place, you should go to mine. You should be safe there. Call Kate and she will arrange everything."

"Thanks. Are you sure? I don't think Jonathan would approve."

"Don't worry about him." His arms envelop me, his lips place a kiss on my temple. "He's just doing his job. He tried the hardest to stay friendly."

I snort. "And he failed miserably at the last part."

"Listen, Eli, he can't tell me who I can date or not. You're going to be fine." He kisses me. "We're going to be fine."

I wrap my arm around him, my head resting against his chest. I try to breathe in his scent, a mix of everything that is good in this world.

"Are you two ready?" Jonathan peeks around the door.

 Dan looks me straight in the eye, raising one eyebrow. "It's time to face the world." 

Hand in hand we leave the room. Someone takes my suitcase from me. It ends up on the big pile of Dan's stuff. Someone is driving the cart with luggage outside.

We walk through the lobby, straight to the exit.

"I hope you brought sunglasses," Dan says, before he opens the door. 

The flashes of cameras blind me instantly, as soon as we step outside the building. I can't see anything, except the glittering lights and the dark outline of Dan's body, who walks in front of me. My gaze is on the ground, following Dan's feet. The voices of people are audible, asking questions, demanding attention, but their faces are hidden behind a never-ending sparkling veil of blinding lights. 

Dan's hand leads me to a black car with dark windows. Someone opens the door and Dan lets me enter first. It's the only moment he lets my hand go. As soon as he's sitting next to me, I grasp his hand again, as if he's my lifebuoy that keeps me from drowning. I feel his fingers entwined with mine, his smile is only for me. And I know, that whatever will happen next, we will be fine.

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AN: Thanks for reading this story, feel free to vote and comment (I love comments).

Sorry for the late update, but I think I have four different versions of this chapter. This is a bit of a turning point, the disadvantages of the relationship are more visible (at least I hope they are). And there's a nudge to the title in the last part with all the flashlights.