chapter five

[ FIVE MONTHS EARLIER ]

     I SMILED AT MY MOM and spun around a few times to model for her. She laughed and clapped her hands as she constantly told me how beautiful I was in this outfit. I'm never one to put on pretty things, so this must be a big deal to my mom to see me so nice.

     I was wearing an outfit I had bought with Julia the week before, and I was loving it. I had on some simple high waisted navy blue velvet shorts and a white crop top that had a small turtleneck - all formal. I had on a statement necklace and my hair was in a high ponytail with the ends curled lightly. I even put on makeup.

     Julia was right, I should definitely dress up more often.

     "Have a great time, hon." My mom smiled and kissed my cheek as I opened the front door.

     She thought I was going to a dinner party with Julia's-friend's-family, but I was actually going to my first high school party a few miles away.

     I was beyond excited.

     I began to walk down the stairs towards a beat up car waiting for me right at the bottom of my house. I knew Julia was waiting for me in there.

     "Jeez, Ashy, you look hot!" My best friend sung as I climbed into the car. I only laughed and sat in the backseat behind her and her new boyfriend Chad. I haven't really talked to him yet but he seemed nice.

     Before I knew it, we were at the party and Julia was guiding me through the house.

     Girls were dancing on guys and vice versa, cups of alcohol were all over the place, the music was blaring, and the house felt hot. I could tell it was going to be a long night, but I kept reassuring myself that I'd be fine because I was here with my best friend, so there was no need to worry.

     "If anyone tries to steal your purse, just start screaming. Someone will come to the rescue." Julia said in my ear. I giggled. "Also, don't go too far. I don't want to lose you in this mess." She said.

     I blushed but tried to hide it by waving my face with my hand.

     "It's hot in here." I said, practically panting like a dog. Julia turned to look at me and burst out laughing.

     "It's all the warm bodies in one place." She explained. The warm bodies had nothing to do with my sudden burst of heat - it was Julia who did that to me. But I'd never tell her that.

     We reached the kitchen and started picking some food of trays together.

     "You're going to have such a great time." She smiled. "It's your first party! Something that needs to go in a photo album!"

     "Yeah." I smiled and plopped a grape inside my mouth. She scrunched up her nose and giggled. I loved to make her laugh. "Guess what I brought?" I smiled and pulled out a bag of sour patch kids. Julia's eyes widened.

     "I've been craving those!" She exclaimed.

     I began to open the bag right when some guy came speeding by me and knocked me off my feet as the sour patch kids went flying. I regained my balance and looked at the floor where all the candies were being stepped on with my mouth agape.

     "Well there goes three bucks." I groaned and rolled my eyes as Julia laughed.

     Chad came up to Julia and whispered something in her ear - very smoothly and soft, may I add. Julia just smiled and nodded her head before walking towards me and handing me her red solo cup.

     "Chad asked me to dance. I'll be right back." She whispered in my ear. It sent shivers down my spine and lit up my body like electricity.

     I couldn't help but wish I was the one to ask her to dance. I wish she would smile and nod her head really fast in agreement after I asked her as we held hands over to the dance floor. And then we would dance.

     I watched the couple as Chad turned her around and she bent down low. Oh, gosh. I probably shouldn't watch this.

     I turned around and gulped as I began to walk a lap around the house.

     In the room next to the kitchen, I found out that this house has its own vending machine. A vending machine. What kind of house has its own vending machine? A pack of sour patch kids caught my eye inside of it and I immediately smiled. I opened up my clutch only to find that I had a twenty dollar bill and nothing else.

     Oh well, I thought. This'll have to do.

     I pulled it out of the clutch and began to put it in, but it was taken from my hands. I turned around, surprised, to find out who just stole my money but I couldn't point out anyone suspicious. There were too many people in this house.

     Defeated, I walked over to the dance floor where I saw Julia last and found that she wasn't there. I furrowed my eyebrows and walked around another lap, luckily finding her sitting around a table with some other people. I came and sat down next to her.

     "Hey. Where'd you go?" She asked.

     "Just took a walk around the house." I shrugged my shoulders. I noticed that people were setting up some sort of game on the glass table in front of us. "What's this?" I asked.

     "Not too sure, but I'm gonna play." She said. I laughed and nodded my head.

     "Okay, I'll play too."

     She looked at me and smiled.

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

     A few hours later, everybody was drunk, people were dancing on top of tables, and the game of poker Julia and I played ended up being the worst game we've ever played. We lost several coins and gum packs to a guy named Daniel.

     Now we were just sitting in a circle on the floor with a few friends from school taking some dares. Julia was sitting across from me, and I couldn't help but notice how amazing her legs look right now.

     I never think of legs as an amazing body part, but hers are really standing out to me. They're shiny, muscular, and smooth.

     She was just perfect.

     "Jim, I dare you to grab Amelia's boobs." Ryan said. Everyone laughed and clapped their hands. Jim cleared his throat and made his way over to Amelia as we all watched him.

     He did just that. And sure enough, Amelia pushed him off of her and started spitting nasty words. He just laughed before coming back to us.

     It was Julia's turn next.

     "Julia," some guy named Reid began, "I dare you to take your shirt off for the rest of the night."

     People oo'd and aww'd and clapped their hands together really loud. I blushed and she looked flustered. But, no one never not does a dare, so she took her shirt off to reveal a lace brallette.

     Everyone roared with laughter. I was surprised and my heart sped up a little. I don't know why, but it did.

     It went around like that until everyone did what they had to do. I was the second to last person, and I was anxious as to what my dare was going to be.

     "Ashley," Reid began, "I dare you to make out with the hottest person here."

     My heart sped up and my face grew red as everyone laughed. Julia was just sitting there across from me, in her stupid lace bra and amazing legs stretched out, and I had to choose who I wanted to kiss?

     I gulped.

     Lunging forward, I grabbed Julia's face as my lips found themselves onto hers. My belly exploded and twisted and turned. I loved the feeling. Her lips were soft and angelic, just how I imagined them.

     I expected her to kiss me back. That's all I wanted - all I've been wanting ever since I realized I loved my best friend. Like, really loved her.

     The next thing I remember was the force at which Julia pushed me off of her. She stood up from the ground and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand as everyone grew silent.

     I looked around and realized everyone's eyes were on me. Just me. Not Julia, not the table, not the barf stain on the carpet, they were all looking at me.

     I felt my heart jump into my throat as Julia walked away and grabbed Chad. I stood up and ran after her, apologizing at an insane volume.

     "Julia, listen-"

     "No!" She yelled. "That was sick, what you just did!"

     Tears filled my eyes and my vision became blurry.

     "What'd she doooo?" Chad asked, obviously hammered.

     "She kissed me, Chad. Kissed me! She almost even made out with me!" I felt like she was talking about an animal that tried to kiss her the way her voice was filled with such hate and disgust. "That was sick." Julia commented. "I know you aren't drunk, because I'm not either. That was stupid."

     Tears stained my face.

     "Ju-Julia-"

     "I always knew there was something wrong with you!" She shouted. By this point, everyone was silent. Even the people in another room were dead silent. The music was turned off. "You always look at me a little too long when I change in front of you, you think I'm the hottest person in the room, and you kiss me right on the lips!"

     By now I was crying so much that I couldn't see her. My entire vision was blurry and unreadable.

     "She kissed you?" Chad asked, stepping forward and setting down his drink. I guess he wasn't too hammered to notice that his girlfriend was, apparently, disgusted by me.

     Without warning, I felt a cold, hard, smack across my cheek. I whimpered and held my face as I crouched to the floor. My cheek was pounding.

     "I never want to talk to you again." She said. I knew she was being serious. And I wept like a baby on the floor in the middle of a party.

     I always listened to Julia. And I had never been more disgusted of myself in my whole life. She was right. I never want to think about a girl they way I thought about Julia ever again. Never in my life am I having this happen again. That's when I made a vow to myself. A vow that I intend to keep because I was in love with Julia - and I'd do anything to please her.

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

*internally screams*

POOR ASHLEY!

I feel like I say that after every chapter but it's true. She needs to FREE HERSELF LIKE A BIRDDDDDDDD LEARNING HOW TO FLYYYY!

(I promise this book won't be sad forever)

Dedication to cherrystix because they made the amazing graphic above <3

See you next week!