Richard's p.o.v

(Flashback/Dream)

"No mom....I'm not with Will anymore....unf..." Rosy tried pushing me away as I nibbled on her earlobe. She was chatting with her mum on the phone.

"....yes he's working. No mom he's not a bum...aaah. What? No I'm just feeling sick that's all. I uh, thought I was going to sneeze."

I laughed while sucking on her neck. She closed her eyes and leaned her head back against my shoulder, letting me explore her neck.

"Uh...no you don't need to come over. He's taking good care of me here."

I smiled and slid my hands over her breasts. I nipped on her skin, making her gasp.

"Uh no mom I thought I was gonna sneeze again. Not feeling very well. Yes he's here with me. In the other room." She looked at me and smiled. I moved my hands over her naked torso.

"Alright. I'll call again tomorrow. Bye." She hung up and sighed turning to me.

"I hate you."

I pulled her closer to me and kissed her softly.

"I hate you too."

She giggled and kissed me, falling on top of me. The sun was peeking through the window, shining on her face.

"You're so beautiful." I said gazing into her eyes. She blushed and bit her lip.

"So are you mister Starkey."

"Now that our band is doing very well, one day, I'll make you my missus. And we'll have kids."

"How many?"

"A house full."

She laid in my arms.

"You're only twenty Ritchie."

"Then when I'm twenty four. We'll start."

"Yeah? How will our life be then?"

"We'll be living in a huge house with house maids and fancy cars. We'll have enough money to go to posh restaurants and buy anything you want."

She made a face.

"No good?"

"Nope."

"How do you picture it then?"

She sat up. "I don't know. I'd like to travel. Ya know, like see places. Do things. Have an adventure."

"We could take a plane anywhere you wanted."

"The point of an adventure is to live in the moment Richard. To be able to smell nature and see things. The good and bad parts of places."

I sat up with her. "What if that's not what I want?"

She looked at me. "I just want you to be happy Richard. And if me wearing fancy dresses and going with you to restaurants is what you want then...I can't do that."

"Rosy, I'm making a name for myself and...well if things start getting better than what they are, I'll be making more money and we can afford better things. You're telling me you'd rather live in this small flat, struggling to get by with a family?"

"You mean have a normal life? Richard I want to struggle. I mean just having things given to you sounds great but....that's just not who I am or what I want."

"So let's just say that five years from now, this band takes me somewhere. I'm making money and I'm touring and we can afford to fly different places. You're telling me you wont enjoy that?"

"I would Richard I just..."

"Just what?"

"I just wouldn't want you to leave me. I mean musicians never last long with their girlfriends once they become famous. Girls will be throwing themselves at you even more than they do."

I sighed and stood up. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Of course you do Richard. I see how those girls look at you after each gig. They want you. And you know it."

"You're just seeing things."

I began to get dressed, ignoring her rambling. I had to leave in half an hour to another gig.

"...is that what you want?"

"Huh? What?"

"Richard! You're not even listening to me!"

"Yes I am. I just...Rosy, I have a gig to get to."

"Yeah leave. Like you always do when we talk about what we really want."

I rolled my eyes. "What are you talking about? And why all of a sudden now is all of this coming out? If we don't want the same things Rosy, why are we even wasting our time together anymore!?"

This shut her up. I sighed and grabbed the keys and put my coat on.

"Richard..."

"No. Just don't. Were not the same as we used to be a year ago Rosy. Admit it. Would it kill you to care what I want?"

"I always care about what you want? It's always about what you want now."

"Well just stop caring alright?" I looked at my watch.

"Shit now I'm late. I'm done with this conversation."

I made my way to the door and Rosy followed wrapped in a sheet.

"Don't I atleast get a kiss goodbye?"

I looked at her and shook my head. "No. Maybe you can add that to the list of things you don't want anymore."

I walked out the door and slammed it shut. I stood outside for a few seconds thinking about going back inside and apologizing. I pushed these thoughts aside and made my way to my vehicle, leaving her behind.

......

"Richard, I need to use the restroom." I woke up and turned to see Rosy sitting up. I nodded and rubbed my eyes.

We got out of the bus and walked to the diner nearby. We walked inside and she left to the loo. I sat at a small table and decided to have a cuppa coffee. I looked at my watch.

Nine eighteen am. I thought about my dream. I treated her badly at the end. By then I was already sleeping with Maureen. Fucking hell i'm an asshole. The look on her face when I left. I was wrong all along. Fame and money wasn't all I though it would be. Being on this trip with Rosy has really made me realise how much I need her in my life. How she's made me into the man I used to be. But...what if all this isn't real?

I sat back and watched Rosy as she made her way over to me.

"Fucking hell I pissed a whole river. This baby is really taking a toll on me." She sat across from me.

I grabbed her hand.

"Rosy, we need to talk."

She looked at me nervously. Last time I said this to her, I told her about Maureen. She nodded.

"I love you Rosy. With all my heart. I was terrible to you. I treated you badly our last few months together all those years ago. I never was able to tell you how sorry I am."

"Richard that was a lon.."

"I'm sorry." I pulled her hand and motioned for her to sit in my lap.

"I feel terrible for treating you so badly. You never talk about it but...I'd like to hear you tell me how you felt."

She sighed. "Richard...I was heartbroken. I devoted my whole life to you. I was angry and hurt and I just wanted to hate you so badly but I couldn't."

"I saw you once."

"What?"

"I saw you a few years later. In New York. You never told me you moved."

"Well Richard we really werent on speaking terms."

"Oh right. Well anyways, I wanted to speak to you but...you were with someone."

I watched her as she bit her lip.

"My boyfriend."

"Was he the one you broke up with before all this happened?"

She nodded. I wrapped my arms around her waist. "He hurt you."

"Yes."

"I'll kill him."

"Richard."

"I will."

"If things go back Richard, If you had to make a choice..."

"I'd choose you."

"Richard you have a life already waiting for you. I know it hurts but...I don't want you to throw your life away because of me."

"What are you saying? That I wouldn't choose you?"

"No i'm not saying that I just..."

"It's not what you want."

"It's not Richard. I still want a normal life."

"What do you think were doing now?"

She sighed. "Richard I don't want to start."

"We still don't want the same thing."

She stayed quiet and looked down. "I guess we don't."

I bit my lip and nodded. "Rosy. This is my life. It's what I do."

"I know Richard. I understand completely."

"I want this baby. I want you. But I also want my life back. Although I've had lot of fun here I....I miss my old life."

She looked at me. "Your old life? Your life with Maureen?"

"Rosy that's not what I meant. I just meant that...well, with her I got the life I really wanted."

She looked hurt. I shook my head.

"No I mean...thats not what I meant to say."

"Richard...maybe things really haven't changed."

"Rosy." I sighed frustrated and just began spilling everything that was jumbled in my mind.

"I love you. Theres nobody else in the world I would ever love as much as I love you. But...I want to be a drummer. I'm in a band. I can't just walk away from it. Maureen was a mistake. But atleast with her I...I became who I was. She gave me the life you wouldn't...the life you held me back from. I'm sorry but if all along this is how you really feel...maybe this..you and me isn't..."

She looked at me. Tears filling her eyes. I felt my heart break just watching her.

"I've always wanted you to follow your dream Richard. I never held you back from doing what you wanted. I love you. But you always put your career first over me. I just want this baby to have a father who will be there for it. And will experience the little moments that really matter with his family."

Without a word she stood up and ran out the door. I sighed and paid for the coffee. I ran outside after her. I looked around but she was nowhere in sight.

"Rosy!" I yelled. I walked to the bus and opened the door. John, Paul and George were sleeping. I noticed Rosy's things gone. I felt my world crashing down on me. I looked on the dashboard and saw her ring. The ring I gave her. The ring I gave her when I proposed.

"Wake up George!" I shook him.

"Huh...what's wrong?"

"Rosy's gone!" I said feeling tears fill my eyes.

.......

Rosy's p.o.v

I heard my name but I didn't bother turning around. I ran until I couldn't breathe. Until my stomach hurt. Until my legs were sore. I finally came to a stop, walking into a small park. The dark clouds covered the sun. I sat on a small bench wiping my tears.

Why is it when I thought things were going perfect for once that my life had to come crashing down on me? It's happening all over again.

It's like what John said. I can't just expect to run away from my problems and expect for everything to be perfect. Last time I ran off like this, I had someone to talk to. Someone to talk some sense into me.

I stood up and put my hands in my pockets. I felt a piece of paper. I pulled it out and looked at the number. David. John said he was back in New York. I sighed and decided to walk until I came across a payphone.

I pulled some change out of my pocket and dialed the number. It rang and rang. I sighed becoming impatient. I was about to hang up when someone answered.

"Hello? David speaking."

"David? Um...it's Rosy. Do you remember me?"

"Hey Rosy! Of course I remember you! How are ya?"

I felt myself begin to cry. He heard this.

"Hey you alright? What's wrong?"

"Richard....I left him..."

"Where are you?"

"Chicago."

"That's only a few days drive to New York. Do you know anyone who can driv..."

"I left them David. They don't know where I'm at. I don't know anybody, I'm scared, pregnant and very much alone. I'm sorry I called you I just...I had nobody else to turn to."

"I understand completely Rosy. Look, find a motel to sleep in tonight. Call me when you get there alright? You have money?"

"Yes. Probably enough for one night."

"Okay. We'll figure something out later okay? You're going to be just fine."

I felt calmness wash over me as I wiped my tears.

"Alright David....Thank you."

"No problem Rosy. Remember to call me alright? I'll be waiting."

"Okay. Bye."

"Goodbye Rose."

I hung up and sighed. I walked inside a small store and asked where I could find a motel. I walked for what seemed like an hour until I finally reached one. I paid for the night and walked inside. I tossed my bag on the bed and sank down on the floor.

The tears came back again. Stupid hormones didn't help. I was very sensitive right now. I just wanted to die.

.......

"...I looked it up and I can get you a flight from there to here, at nine tonight. Are you sure you want to come over so quickly?"

"I really don't have a choice David. I'll take the flight."

"Alright Rosy. I arranged everything so you're covered."

"Thank you so much. I really don't know what I would have done if I hadn't called you."

"I'm glad you did. You can stay with me and my girlfriend."

I smiled. "Alright. Thanks."

"No problem. I gotta go now. I have a gig at five. I should be home later.

Call me from the airport before you leave alright?"

"I will. Again...thank you."

"You're welcome."

We hung up. I sighed and stared at the door. I really didn't have a choice now. I was leaving. On my own again. The baby.

I put a hand over my stomach and began to cry.

......

A couple hours later, I managed to take a shower and fix myself up. My eyes were still pink from crying but I looked better than before. I sighed and looked at the clock. Seven thirty. I decided to call a cab to take me to the airport.

"Everything will be alright. I'll go. Get on the plane. Stay with David. I hope Richard's alright."

Stop thinking about him.

I have to know if he's okay.

He doesn't want you anymore.

I'm pregnant with his child.

He just cares about his career. He's getting bored of you.

Shut up!

I pushed my thoughts aside and turned the lights off, heading for the door.

......