I speak of a Jeffrey Dahmer in this chapter, a brutal serial killer and touch on the things that he did to his victims. This is a trigger warning, and this chapter contains brief mentions of extreme violence and sexual assault.

-

I'm so stupid. Why would I wink at her like that? God, she probably thinks I'm a creep.

I held my face in my hands, feeling the blood rush to my face. I sat down on my bed and peered around my messy room. Clothes were thrown everywhere. My computer sat halfway shut on my desk that was littered with school papers. I groaned as I got up from my bed and started changing into something less hideous.

Audrey was tough to crack. I don't even know why in the world I wanted to crack her. She was mysterious, sarcastic, dark, reserved. She snuck out and kept to herself, but at the same time didn't mind asking random neighbors for rides places in the middle of the night.

But God, was she gorgeous. Audrey glimmered in the sun and beamed in the moonlight. She put Monet's and Van Gogh's art to shame. Her olive skin complimented her dark eyes so magnificently. Audrey was small and she knew it. But she somehow though she could tower everyone she knew. Even me.

Audrey's looks were just a plus, though. She was brilliant and so sophisticated for such a young age. Audrey had depth, maturity. She was only 17, but I felt that she had lived so much life. That's how she portrayed herself. Well educated, well traveled, well mannered. At least from what I can tell so far.

I headed downstairs and out the front door, thoughts of Audrey rushing through my mind.

"Hey!"

I jerked my head to the right, squinting at Audrey as she excitedly wave at me. She made her way towards me, her long hair flowing in the wind.

She held a book close to her chest. I squinted at the title as she came closer towards the steps leading to my front door. I could make out the words "Jeffrey Dahmer" in title and I raised an eyebrow. I didn't consider it typical for someone to cling to a book about a serial killer with evidence based cannibalistic tendencies.

"What's up?" Audrey asked. Her voice was chipper, a 180 from the way she spoke to me from her window a few moments ago.

I took a few steps down the wooden stairs to meet her at the bottom. "Standing on my front porch with you and your-" I cleared my throat as I found the right word to describe my feelings about her book. I now towered in front of her, and I carefully plucked the book from her arms, "-interesting novel."

Audrey innocently looked at the book in my hand as a flipped through a few of the first pages. Her head tilted to the side like a puppy. "You don't like this stuff?" She asked.

I laughed, handing the thick piece of work back to her and folded my arms over my chest. "Why would I like a man who murdered, raped, and dismembered like what? Ten people?" I said, more sarcastic than I intended. She lifted her pointer finger to fact check me.

"Seventeen."

I rolled my eyes, Audrey obtained a lot of knowledge on things that weren't typical. I actually really liked that about her, and it made her a...unique character.

"And it's not about liking the person at all," she added. "Or liking anything about his awful actions or death or anything like that. It's the behavior and psychology behind him. What forms a person to be a crazy killer like this. It's super interesting." She rambled on. When she spoke, even about a murderer, it was a sweet sound.

I smiled at her, "Okay."

-

Audrey was in the passenger seat of my car, seat leaned back, and flipping through songs on her phone to play over my speakers. It sounded like they could burst at anytime from how loud it was, but that didn't matter to me. What did matter to me was that Audrey was opening herself up to me in the moment.

"It's complicated," she yells over the music.

The sky was is full dusk. Shades of navy and purple intertwined through the clouds. The skyline consisted of rooftops and tall trees. Orange burst through the background of the scene. It resembled a painting I could reach out and touch.

I nervously asked about Ashton a few moments ago. I had taken her there a handful of times now and she never spoke of him.

"In July, we were with our friends at his house," Audrey spoke. A sense of relief washed over me. I had been afraid I was out of line for asking. "Everyone has fallen asleep. We kissed for the first time there on his couch." She told me.

I glanced over to her. She was running a finger over her bottom lip. I'm sure she was imagining kissing Ashton and how that felt for her. I wondered the same thing. It was becoming harder to focus on the road when I wanted to focus on Audrey. Earlier, she insisted we take a joyride, though. She told me it made her feel relaxed and free.

Audrey sighed, reaching over to turn down the knob for the volume. "We've been friends for a while, you know? It doesn't feel like we can go back to being friends."

"Why not?" I asked, flipping on my blinker. I shifted so I only needed to drive with just one hand. I used my free arm to rest on the center console.

She sat a thought for a moment. Her eyes narrowed at the road ahead of us as it curved. "Because that kiss bloomed into so much more," she told me. Me and Audrey met eyes for a second, both returning our interest to the black concrete.

I raised my eyebrow, "A relationship?"

"No, not that," she laughed. "I don't think either of us are ready for a relationship. If I'm honest, I don't really want one." I liked when Audrey was honest. She was opening herself up, in the most cliche way, like a book. It was getting easier to read her. I knew what faces she made when she felt sad or stressed, happy or simply content.

"Why's that?" I asked, like we were playing twenty questions.

"I mean, I like Ashton. As a person, I always have." She stumbled over her sentence. I thought maybe it was an attempt to make things more than they were. "Dating him just isn't something I really want, I guess. I don't mind staying over at his house or being physical with him. Everything's just different now." She shrugged, "I don't know."

We didn't speak for a minute. We carefully listened to the lyrics playing through the aux cord. I noticed the cars in the opposite direction of us had windshield wipers on, indicating it was raining just a distance away.

"You have the power to change things, Audrey." I told her, glancing back over to her. A raindrop fell on my windshield. "I'm not telling you do to anything, but if you really don't want to be with him like this then why stay?" I asked as rain trickled onto my windshield. It was a light rain, but soon turned heavy.

"Our friendship." She spoke over the falling water. She turned off the music. "I don't want to lose that. Maybe it's already gone, I don't know. I don't want to find out." Audrey sighed, I could tell she felt a bit distressed.

I stopped fully at the four way stop. No cars were out, so I decided to keep my foot on the brake. I turned to her and took the chance to study her. I wanted to read her.

Audrey pushed her hair out of her way. I caught a glimpse of a small hickey just below her ear. I deduced not to comment on it. She turned in her seat to meet me, leaning forward and resting her elbows on my center console with her chin in her hands. Audrey stared up at me through her dark and full eyelashes, a coat of mascara lengthening them.

"You," I began, unsure of where I was going with my statement. "Have a lot of courage. And I think you should do what will make you the happiest." I told her.

Her facial expression didn't change. She replied to me by batting her eyelashes.

"Do you love him?" I quietly asked, fixating on her deep brown eyes.

She shook her head gently, "I don't think so." Audrey looked around for a moment, contemplating if she should speak or not. "I've never been in love," she whispered.

I broke my focus from her and finally passed through the stop sign. It was still raining, lightly now. The only thing illuminating the sky was the fair going on near the pier. It was empty, or course. A few people were seen hurrying to their cars as the rain continue to fall.

"I want to go to the fair. Ashton doesn't want to go with me," she admitted.

Before thinking, I spoke. "I'll take you."

Audrey managed to let out a breathy laugh in the silence. "You don't have to."

Colors bounced around the street from the attraction, blue, red, orange, purple. It looked just like the sky earlier in the night.

I checked over at her while she stared in awe as we passed the bright lights and closed tents. I smiled, "But I want to."

-

A/N: was this too long??? i never know how to write anymore smh

sorry for the long ass wait, i wanted to get the right direction with this trick ass book

ilysm if you're reading this, plz vote and comment <33333