Ryan found Auggie and Josh in the kitchen, coloring.

"Oooh, Auggie, can you pass me a blue?" Ryan asked, picking up a barely touched scrap of paper.

They sat there coloring for a peaceful minute before Maya and Riley came back to interrogate Shawn.

"I need to talk to you," Maya stated, looking up at Shawn.

"Did you not just hear our song?" Cory asked, offended. "Oh we all heard it," Ryan chimed in, pointedly staring down at his drawing as to avoid his Dad's look.

"Hey, Ryan, that's really good," Josh commented, pointing his own crayon at Ryan's paper.

He drew Josh, doing the best shading and blending that Crayola would provide.

"Thanks, Josh."

"Why do you make Riley feel bad?" Ryan heard Maya question, loudly. Ryan looked up from his paper awkwardly.

"I don't mean to," Shawn replied. Ryan looked at Riley who was staring at her shoes. Ryan rolled his eyes, leave it to Maya to do things the awkward way.

"Well you do," Maya began to sound choked up, "And that's not cool with me. Cause I'm her best friend," Maya held Riley's hand. "So I just wanted to tell you that."

Ryan looked to Auggie and Josh awkwardly.

"Ryan, can you draw me?" Auggie asked. Ryan smiled and grabbed the crayon box. "Sure, what color do you wanna be?"

--

"Do all adult men need naps?" Ryan asked as he pulled a box of extra Christmas decorations from the hall closet. He handed it to Josh. "I think so?" Josh replied. They walked down the hall into the living room and began decorating Alan with the lights and tinsel.

"Should we be doing this?" Auggie asked when they were about halfway done with the box. Ryan and Josh shared a look.

"Absolutely."

"What's the difference between having an older daddy and having a younger daddy?" Auggie asked.

"Financial stability, mostly," Ryan said. Josh elbowed him while Ryan laughed.

"Younger daddy doesn't fall asleep in the middle of a party?" Josh suggested. Ryan rolled his eyes as the three of them looked to Shawn and Cory who were asleep next to Alan.

Maya got up from where she was sitting next to Riley on the bench and leaned over Shawn.

"How could you possibly not like Riley?" Ryan sighed. "Maya please stop asking that."

Maya just narrowed her eyes more. "How could you like Ryan more? I mean, she's Riley!" Ryan sat back, offended. Josh and Auggie tried to comfort him.

"Maya!" Riley stopped her. Shawn looked up at them both, confused. "What is she talking about?"

Ryan looked at Josh and whispered, "Should we leave?"

Josh shook his head. "I think we'd make it more awkward."

"Whenever you come over," Riley said, "You always find some excuse not to talk to me and spend a lot of time with Ryan, and then you leave."

Could Ryan make a break for it?

As the conversation progressed, Ryan slid down the couch until he reached the floor. Josh lifted his legs while giving him a 'really?' look. Ryan army crawled behind the couch to the kitchen table.

"Dinner's ready!" Topanga called. Ryan popped up next to his mother with a smile, earning a shout from her. Amy just laughed and high fived him.

"Who taught you to be so sneaky?" Topanga asked as everyone gathered around the table.

Ryan shrugged with a smile. "I have a lot of friends."

--

Once again, Ryan was confused because eating was apparently offensive to his mother?

She looked very confused as everyone finished their plates.

"Five minutes? That dinner took two days to cook and you animals ate it in five minutes!"

Oh, that's why.

Josh looked at Auggie, proud. Ryan just shook his head and chuckled.

"What's for dessert, mom?" Riley had the apparent audacity to ask.

You go, Riley.

"Nothin! I want you to sit there for two days and think about that dinner you just devoured, and then maybe I'll give you a cupcake."

Yikes.

Ah, well.

"Well, I thought it was great, Topanga. Thank you, I don't get a lot of home-cooked meals," Shawn thanked.

Maybe they should all be more like him.

"Yeah, thank you, mom. Dinner was amazing." Ryan thanked. Topanga smiled at him. "You're welcome, Ryan." They both stared at Cory.

"What?"

Dude.

"Oh. How's the job going, Shawn."

Don't let this be like the chicken incident.

"Oh, you do something?" Maya pulled the conversation to her, which, for once, Ryan was thankful for.

As their conversation progressed from confrontational to understanding, Ryan gathered everyone's dirty plates.

"Ok, that's it, when's my birthday, Uncle Shawn?" Riley pressed. Ryan scoffed as he put them in the sink. "Do you seriously think he doesn't know our birthday?"

"He knows, Riley," Cory reassured. Ryan leaned against the sink with his arms crossed.

"If you keep on saying that, why won't he answer?" Riley looked at Shawn. "What did I do?"

Shawn got up from the table. He shared a look with Ryan and began to leave the apartment. When he opened the door he looked back at Riley and Maya. "You coming or what?"

When the three of them left, Ryan took a deep breath. He looked at Cory. "I'm gonna go get the ornament."

"Don't you want to wait for Shawn and the girls to get back?" Cory asked. Ryan shook his head with an unsteady laugh.

"No, no. I'll tell them on my own time. I'd rather see what the girls' reaction is by myself." With that Ryan jogged to his room and picked up the box from his bedside table.

Ryan came back out and sat down at his previous seat and looked around at his awaiting family.

He tapped at the box erratically with his thumbs. "So, mom, dad, and I had a recent conversation that prompted dad to buy me this," Ryan held up the box.

"What is it?" Josh asked. Ryan smiled nervously and lifted the top. He pulled it out by its ribbon and showed it off to the rest of the family.

"Dad bought me this because I'm gay. Well," Ryan shrugged, "Bisexual, but it's easier to say gay. I just wanted to tell you guys." Ryan looked around at his family's faces.

"Dude, same," Josh held out his hand for a high five, which Ryan quickly accepted. "Oh, nice!"

Alan and Amy just looked at him with soft smiles, and Cory and Topanga were giving him proud looks.

It was a nice, warm feeling that settled nicely in his chest.

"What does that mean?" Auggie asked. Ryan shrugged. "Well, it just means that I like girls and guys."

"Then why haven't you had a boyfriend?"

Damn, Auggie.

"Well, I, uh." Ryan stuttered. Josh laughed and clapped a hand on his shoulder.

"He's got you there."

"What about you, Uncle Josh? Have you ever had a boyfriend?" Auggie asked. Ryan looked smug as Josh fumbled for an answer.

"Oh, honey, is this why you said your parents were ignoring you? Because they hadn't accepted it until now?" Amy asked, walking around to put her hands on his shoulders.

Topanga looked irritated. "Ryan, why would you tell them we were ignoring you?"

Ryan shrugged, warmth quickly turning to ice in his chest. "I don't know, because you were?"

"We weren't! We already went over this, we were just giving you space," Cory opposed. Ryan scoffed and began fidgeting with the ribbon tied at the top of the ornament.

"I don't really think that works the same way with ten-year-olds as it does with teenagers."

"It really doesn't," Alan supported. Cory sighed. "Well if you thought that, why didn't you confront us about it?"

"I told them not to! I thought it would stop on its own, I didn't know it was going to last three years!"

"Why didn't you talk to us about it before now!" Topanga argued. Ryan rolled his eyes. "Well excuse me if you guys didn't provide the best environment for a confrontational conversation!"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Ryan stood and Amy sat down next to Josh.

"It means that whenever I talked to you, you either left to go do work or you left to go talk to Riley and check up on Riley, or whatever the--" Ryan censored himself with a groan, remembering Auggie was there this time, "about Riley! You didn't let me talk to you, that's what I'm saying!" Ryan shouted, tears stinging at his eyes.

"You're important to us, I would've listened to you," Topanga said, close to tears.

"I didn't feel important!"

That sure as hell silenced the room.

Ryan took an awkward step back.

"For three years I felt like the most unimportant person in the world. Like if one day I just decided not to come back, you wouldn't've cared. That's what giving a ten-year-old space does."

Ryan took a steadying breath and closed his eyes. "I'm gonna go to my room now."

He set the ornament down and walked away.

--

Topanga knocked gently on the door three hours later, Cory by her side. She pushed it open to see Ryan sitting on his bed, hugging his pillow.

"Ryan, can we come in?"

Ryan sighed and set the pillow down before nodding.

Cory and Topanga sat on either side of the bed before giving him a hug.

"We are so sorry," Topanga said, kissing his head. Ryan sighed before putting his arms around his parents.

"I forgive you," Ryan said, leaning into Cory.

"I don't think we deserve to be forgiven."

Ryan chucked. "No, really. I was the first kid, between me and Riley, you were bound to fuck up somewhere."

His parents squeezed him one last time. "Let's go hang that ornament."

Ryan smiled and nodded.

--

Everyone was gathered in the living room as Ryan walked in with his parents. They both smiled down at him before walking ahead.

Ryan smiled and grabbed the box that was sitting on the table.

"So listen," Shawn grabbed the attention of the room, "I have an assignment next weekend up in Columbia County in Upstate New York," as Shawn talked about the group trip, Ryan quietly snuck behind everyone and walked up to the tree.

He took the ornament out of the box and placed it near the middle of the tree. He stood back and looked at it, surrounded by the rest of the family ornaments.

Oh look at that, the warm feeling was back.

A/n: so I write when I feel like it, so,,,,,,,,,,,,

I just felt like writing fanfic about old shows, rather than this old show

dw, I do still love this story, just expect more ep skips from here on