Days went by, and Elfie didn't go upstairs, just like Jared didn't appear again. The haunted house was silent again.

It was relaxing for the first few days, but soon X Factor ended. Elfie knew she couldn't watch that again, not alone.

She wobbled upstairs, taking the longest shower ever, careful because the most probable place to die in a home was the bathroom, and as a veteran alcoholic who lived on her own, she knew her limits: she washed herself in slow-motion. It wasn't the fear of dying, but the shame of being found naked in some awkward position, spread over her toiletries. Elfie had been a laughing stock all her life, she didn't want to die like that. Her eventual death was all she had left to do, and she would see to it that it would not turn into the usual shit-fest she made out of everything.

Exiting the bathroom, the bedroom was still hollow under the artificial light, no personal items anywhere. It was night time, so maybe Kai had the day, and the other, the night. Perfect for their man-drama, they could avoid each other for eternity.

She stood still for minutes. Next on her itinerary was to get a fresh bottle of vodka. Maybe canned soup, to survive on something else.

"Is there anything I can help you with?" Kai appeared, framed by the window. The way they instantiated in front of her was the only thing that confirmed to Elfie the men's ghost story. It was some hologram effect, transparent over the furniture and then it filled in with details until it drew the entire picture, like a Bob Ross painting, gaining volume and weight. If she could figure out how they did that, she could finally stop being the crazy woman who believed in the afterlife.

Because if a handshake -- her first verification -- and a kiss were any proof, Jared was very human, even feeling warm against her. The ghost story was bogus, she just had to find out how they did it. And why.

"You seem kinda lost," Kai said. He had a framed picture in his hand that wasn't from Elfie's stuff. It was like he'd brought it with him from another dimension.

"I was kinda hoping you two brooders would leave me alone. Apparently not," she stiffened.

He was observing her like some bug in a jar, so she added, "At least Downstairs Ghost got the message."

"Oh, is this Jared, Phase Two: Disappointment?" his perfect smile made his words sound cold, despite him trying for humor. "It's for the best," he concluded.

"No," Elfie said. "What would be for the best would be for you and your friend to leave me alone. I feel watched twenty-four-seven! This is the type of thing you call the police to handle!"

"By all means," he showed her the landline outlet, obviously no phone installed -- Elfie had a smartphone, like the rest of civilization. "Tell them about the intruding ghosts."

She bit her lip to not scream in frustration. They were getting to her. The bad guy wanted to mess with her head, the good guy wanted her to think he was on her side. Both distractingly hot, so that her brain would zombify even more.

Worst? Alcohol tasted like gasoline she kept pouring on a fire. Immensely entertaining, but the burn lasted too long. Maybe it was cirrhosis.

"So you two split the house and the day, like in a custody agreement? All divorced?" she rattled the too calm man. Like a suited Labrador, he simultaneously looked happy to be in it, but also very uncomfortable. Fun to watch, though.

"We avoid each other, yes. Since we have no physical needs like sleeping, we can stay anywhere. We also have the luxury to disappear from each other's face so it helps a lot. Five years, haven't unnecessarily spoken once," Kai said, proud.

"Yey, luxury indeed," Elfie said, upset he wasn't getting it while obviously thinking that he did.

"So you died five years ago?" she hated that she had to ask, silence was worse.

"Oh, you mean he didn't tell you?" Kai was surprised. "I thought he was convincing you he was innocent this entire time." He looked over Elfie, "Maybe he thought he wouldn't stand a chance, you seem like a smart girl. He's good with women, but they need to be simple," he winked.

If Elfie had a cent for every time a man called her smart while patting her head like she was dog-smart, and not human-smart, she would not be living in a haunted house.

Kai brought her back into the cramped bedroom, made smaller by him occupying half of it. "He didn't tell you how he killed me?"

Although Elfie believed everything he said was true, she had to say, "Don't care, leave me out of this!"

She ran down the stairs.