|28| - "Anything Pedro-related makes me feel awkward. " -

"Now I know it's Valentine's Day and we're spending it in Paris, but I am not going to propose. Okay, Bella?"

I rolled my eyes as we shuffled along in the queue for Border Control. "If you keep making jokes like that, then I might not say yes when you finally do pop the question."

Nathan chuckled to himself before subtly stepping in front of a man who'd been trying to jump the queue. When he wrapped his arm around my waist, we created a very effective barrier-but I liked to think my boyfriend's intentions were purely romantic.

"You feeling apprehensive about the Jess and Jack thing?" Nathan asked.

"Not about them as a couple, no. I just don't want tonight to be weird and them both to be tip-toeing around me or feeling like they can't act naturally when I'm in the room."

"I'm sure it'll be fine. Once everyone has had a few drinks..."

He didn't need to finish that sentence. Neither of us would be able to forget what we'd nearly witnessed while hidden in Jess' bathroom. Not that we'd been behaving any better at the time...

We caught a taxi straight to the Airbnb place we'd booked. Jack had offered us a spot on his apartment floor, but Nathan had turned that down. Our accommodation was only a couple of streets away from Jack's, so an easy walk back. I don't think Nathan had been particularly keen on spending the night on a hard surface, and he tactfully explained that us staying elsewhere would leave more space for Shaun or the old school friends who would also be joining.

"So do I need to entertain myself this afternoon?" Nathan asked as we unpacked.

I glanced across at him. "What do you mean?"

"Are you going to be spending the next six hours getting ready?"

I scoffed. "Got to look my best for when you propose, haven't I?"

❤

Jack wanted to throw a party that everyone would be talking about for years to come. He'd therefore decided that the best way to ensure we all had a good time was to ply us with free-flowing alcohol.

What better way of guaranteeing a memorable night than guaranteeing nobody can remember it?

"So are either of your handsome friends over there single?" Louisa asked Jack as we huddled by the makeshift bar.

She'd clocked Charlie and Lewis as soon as she'd walked in the room. And it was nothing to do with them being the only two boys at the party she hadn't yet met, she'd assured us.

"Both of them," Jack said.

"And are they properly single, or are they talking to any girls?"

Jack frowned. "You can still be single and talk to girls, Lou."

She shrugged. "Maybe. But I don't want to tread on any toes if they've already got something going on with someone else."

"Why don't you go and ask them yourself, then?" Jack suggested before taking a swig of his beer.

His eyes had begun to roam the room, losing interest in Louisa as he surveyed his guests like a King presiding over his subjects.

"Because you can't always trust boys to tell the truth, especially on international ground where they think basic morals no longer apply."

That captured Jack's attention again, and even Nathan and I stiffened at her blatant reference to Pedro. She barely spoke about him and we'd learnt not to ask too many questions. If Louisa wanted to talk about something, she would never need prompting.

"My boys are decent," Jack said, lowering his voice. "I wouldn't be mates with them if they weren't."

The words sounded soft, as if trying to placate Louisa, but the tiniest hint of offence was present. Louisa must have noticed it, too, because she made a swift attempt to justify her reservations.

"I'm only doing my own due diligence, Jack. I've been the other girl once before. I am not doing it again."

"Then maybe don't take the risk, Louisa, and leave them both alone."

He pushed himself away from the wall he'd been leaning against and swept past us, making a beeline for Charlie and Jess who were stood chatting on the other side of the room. He did seem offended, but when his arm wound around Jess' waist, touching her for what appeared to be the first time that evening, I couldn't help but wonder if Louisa had planted a seed of doubt in his mind.

"I think he's just feeling protective," I said. "Pedro shocked us all with his behaviour. Jack probably doesn't want his friends being painted with the same brush."

Typically for her, she didn't seem put out by Jack's obvious irritation with her. She shrugged it off and topped up her prosecco glass.

"Whatever. Like he said, not worth the risk."

"You'll have to take that risk someday," I said, just as Nathan excused himself from the conversation.

I couldn't help feeling at least partly responsible for the Pedro situation. I'd introduced him to our friendship group during our first year at uni, ironically as a way to force the dust to settle after he'd come onto me. Looking back, that should have rung alarm bells. Instead, I'd genuinely believed he regretted the attempted kiss and had felt almost relieved when he took an interest in Louisa. It had certainly made things less awkward for Nathan and me; not only had he reassured Nathan that he had no intentions of hitting on me again, he'd also turned his attention onto a different girl.

We'd never know the full story of Louisa and Pedro. Fiercely proud, Louisa hated to show weakness-no matter what dramas were unfolding in the wings. What we did know, however, was that at some point during the summer between first year and second year of uni, Pedro had reunited with an ex-girlfriend in Spain. And he hadn't told Louisa.

For months, he dated both of them-Louisa in the U.K. and Marina in Spain. Neither of them knew about it. But nothing stays secret with social media.

"Someday I will," Louisa said, shrugging in agreement. "Maybe when I stop feeling sick every time I think about what I've put his poor girlfriend through."

"Louisa..." My heart ached. I couldn't believe I'd once had doubts about her intentions with Nathan. "You don't know you were the other woman. He was already dating you when he reconnected with her..."

She let out a bitter laugh before taking a large gulp of prosecco. Admittedly, that was a weak argument on my part. I just wanted to make her feel better.

"Izzy, he'd been with Marina all throughout school. They'd only broken up the previous summer when he decided to go to uni in the U.K. I was definitely the other woman."

Pedro's excuse when he'd hit on me was that he'd misread the situation. Some girls in long-distance relationships prefer to have something a little closer to home, he'd said. I hadn't technically been in a long-distance relationship at that point-Nathan just lived further away than we'd been used to. In hindsight, I wondered whether the desires of those supposed girls actually reflected his own opinion on long-distance. He wanted to have his cake and eat it, too.

"Well, other woman or not, you were definitely the better woman. What kind of girl finds out her boyfriend has been two-timing her and then blames the woman and not the guy?"

Louisa offered me a grateful smile. "You're a good friend, Izzy. But it's fine. Hurt people react in illogical ways. She'd been with him for years and I was just some random floozy from England. Easier to blame me than go through the drama of a break-up, right?"

"I just don't know how you can stay with someone who's treated you like that. Regardless of whether she blamed you or not, Pedro still cheated. Repeatedly."

"I know. I was there, remember?"

I sighed and forced a smile out of guilt. "Sorry. He just makes me so angry."

"But you can see why I'm hesitant to jump into something else, right? Casual or serious. I'm just not ready. Can't even bring myself to take the next step with my hot accountant."

No wonder Louisa felt an office romance was the safer option. It would be much harder to hide secret girlfriends when all your colleagues know your business.

"Like you say, you need to be ready. Risk goes both ways. You don't want to ruin something that might be good by rushing in before you're ready."

"Cheers to that," she said, knocking her glass against mine and effectively putting an end to the closest thing to a Pedro-related conversation we'd had in a long time.

❤

Maybe Louisa truly had planted a seed of doubt in Jack's head by implying his friend might not be above hitting on Jess, or maybe he'd had enough drinks to persuade himself that he didn't need to be so sensitive about their romance in front of me. Either way, he'd ramped up his affections towards her and I was relieved that they no longer seemed to be treading on eggshells around me.

"Was Lou okay?" Nathan asked me as we caught some fresh air at the bottom of the steps leading up to the front door.

"Yeah. Not that I'd know if she wasn't. She puts on a brave face, doesn't she?"

"I think she's just brave."

"Fair enough," I said. "She's definitely rational about the whole thing."

"That's the impression I've got, too, whenever I've spoken to her about it."

He opened his mouth as if to say something else, but then promptly shut it and wound his arm around my shoulder, pulling me tight against his body. I cuddled closer to the warmth emanating from his chest, my hands sliding inside the back pockets of his jeans to shield them from the icy air.

"Something on your mind?" I asked.

My voice sounded muffled against his shirt, but Nathan released a long sigh, obviously having heard me.

"Yeah. Just anything Pedro-related makes me feel awkward."

"Awkward?" I repeated, leaning back from his chest to gauge his expression.

His lips pursed together as he gazed down at me, brow furrowing. A gust of wind ruffled his fringe and he jerked his head to flick the hair away from his eyes.

"Awkward in a guilty sense."

"Why do you feel guilty? I'm the one who introduced them."

"Not because of Pedro. Because of Marie."

"Oh. Well, it's not really the same thing."

Tightening his arms around my body, Nathan planted a soft kiss to my forehead. I relaxed against his chest again, closing my eyes.

"I know it's not," he said, "but I still caused you pain, just as Pedro hurt Louisa. And I like to think I'm a much better man than Pedro."

"Nathan." I stepped out of his arms and climbed up a step until we were face-to-face. "You are a better man than Pedro. We've dealt with that situation and moved on. Don't keep torturing yourself over it."

"I can't ignore what I put you through-"

"No," I said, "I know you can't. But continually trying to punish yourself won't make it any better. Nor will making comparisons. We just need to move forwards."

He sighed and wound his arms around my waist, fingers splaying across my back. Heat soaked through my coat and dress, alighting my skin beneath the layers.

"I know we were only joking about it earlier," Nathan said, "but I'm genuinely so excited to marry you, Bella."

His eyes bore into mine with such an intensity that all thoughts of Marie disappeared from my mind. There, on that stone step in Paris, we might have been surrounded by a bitter wind and threat of rain, but the City of Love brought me nothing but positive thoughts of the future on Valentine's Day.

❤❤❤

Thank you for reading :) xx