Chapter 29 - "Sorry I'm late."

The rain continued over the next few days. How I hated living in England. I bet the weather was nicer in Italy... Pretty much all of my thoughts recently involved Nathan. Where was he? What was he doing? Was he missing me as much as I was missing him? I never thought I'd be able to miss a person this much; my life was suddenly feeling so mundane, lacking the excitement that Nathan often brought to it.  

In an attempt to distract myself, I'd rung Jess to arrange another shopping trip but she had already made plans with Alex. I bit the bullet and went alone. If I continued to sit in the house then I'd only carry on obsessing over Nathan's absence. I told myself that, instead, I'd devote my attention to buying a new outfit for Nathan to see me in upon his return.  

The shopping centre was heaving with people, which didn't exactly make it a pleasant experience. Usually I enjoyed going by myself but, when you could barely move through a shop, it wasn't anywhere near as entertaining. What should have been a fun task of finding a nice outfit quickly turned into a tedious ordeal. Just as I was about to give it up as a bad job, my day got even worse.  

I'd rounded a corner, busy staring at my phone as I typed out a message to Jess, when I collided into someone. My phone flew out of my hand but just as I was about to gasp an apology at whoever I'd bumped into, I realised who it was.  

"Sorry," Matt apologised, bending down to pick up my phone. He passed it over to me, smiling apologetically.  

I forgot how to form words as I took it from his out-stretched hand. Even though I'd seen him at school a lot, it was the first time we'd properly interacted since the break-up.

"Um, thanks," I mumbled eventually. "I wasn't looking where I was going." 

"So...how's things?" he asked, shoving his hands into his pockets and rocking backwards and forwards. It was something he'd always done whilst anxious or uncomfortable. Who'd have thought that the two of us would ever feel this awkward around one another, though?  

I shuffled uncomfortably. I really didn't want to be having this conversation. Despite my strong feelings for Nathan, Matt would always have a small part of me, no matter how much of a dick he'd been.  

"They're good," I said, trying to think of excuses to get myself out of this situation. "How about you?" 

He shrugged. "All right, I guess." 

"Good...cool..." I stuttered.  

Matt seemed intent on prolonging the conversation, though; he couldn't have been oblivious to my unease, but maybe that was why he so desperately wanted to form a stronger dialogue between us.  

"I just can't wait for uni to be honest," he said, giving me a small smile.  

I briefly wondered if he'd be breaking up with Lucy before uni. After all, he said long distance never works. Even though I knew it shouldn't bother me, I couldn't help but feel that it would be a real kick in the teeth if they ended up staying together and doing long distance.  

"Yeah," I agreed, even though I was in no hurry to go to uni. I much preferred being able to see Nathan every day at school. "I just want exams to be over." 

"Tell me about it..." he murmured.  

Why couldn't I think of an escape? I stood there lamely, passing my phone from hand to hand. The two of us used to be so comfortable together and now we could hardly bear to look at each other. It was horrible; I'd never wanted to be like this with Matt. On the same note, though, I'd never imagined him cheating on me.  

In the end, I gave up trying to think of a suitable excuse. 

"I should be going," I told him. "See ya." 

He looked like he was about to say something but then thought better of it. "Yeah. See you around." 

I sincerely hoped I didn't see him around.

- 

"So he was just...there?" Jess was saying down the phone.  

I sighed and reclined on my bed. "Yeah. I literally walked straight into him. The mall was heaving! Out of all the people I could have walked into..." 

"Did you talk?" 

"Very briefly and very awkwardly," I replied. "It was horrible. It's making me miss Nathan more than ever." 

"It's cute that you're missing him," she said and, even though I couldn't see her, I knew she was smiling.  

"It's not cute; it's annoying," I muttered. "The guy drives me mad half the time... I'm not supposed to miss that." 

Jess laughed. "Mad with love..." 

"Oh, shut up," I said with a smile. "He's still allowed to drive me mad even if I love him. In fact, even more so probably." 

"So, when's he back?" Jess then asked.  

"Four days. But really it's more like five days because he gets back late so I probably won't be able to see him until the next day." 

"Ah, okay. Well, do you fancy going out for a meal soon?" she suggested. "That'll take your mind off him." 

"Yeah, that sounds like a really nice idea, actually."

"Chinese?" 

"Sure. Can we make it the day after tomorrow, though? I've got, like, a family dinner thing tomorrow and I don't think my mum will be too impressed if I skive it." 

"Of course." 

"I'll see you then. I'm looking forward to it." 

"Me, too," she replied.  

-

I really was looking forward to the meal with Jess. After losing my friendship with Katrina, Jess and I had grown even closer. She'd been a supportive friend throughout all of my recent dramas. Now that things were getting serious between Nathan and me, I wanted to make sure I still gave her equal attention. After all, she still managed to successfully balance her friendships and her relationship, so I wanted to do the same.  

When I arrived at the restaurant, she wasn't there. I hung around outside for a while, shivering in the cold, pacing up and down. Five minutes later, she rang me.  

"Hey! Sorry, I'm running late!" she gushed in a panicked voice. "Will you meet me inside? It's way too cold for you to wait outside." 

"Sure. You want me to sit down?" I asked, already making my way towards the door.

"Yeah. Go to the table and wait for me." 

"All right. I'll see you soon."  

I cancelled the call and slipped the phone into my pocket where it was easily accessible in case she called again.  

The warmth of the restaurant was welcoming as I took my seat at the table and immediately began to peruse the menu. I always ordered the same thing yet still scoured the menu every time I came here just in case, one day, I fancied a change.

"Hey. Sorry I'm late." 

Upon hearing that familiar, goose bump inducing voice, I dropped the menu in shock. Rather than seeing Jess sit down opposite me, Nathan sat down. He casually picked up the menu and began to browse it, as though his being here wasn't anything out of the ordinary.  

"I'm feeling chicken fried rice...what are you having?" he asked, his eyes darting up and down the menu pages.  

My heart skittered as words escaped my brain. All I could do was stare at him, as though he might disappear any second. After over two weeks without him, he was here, in this restaurant, sat opposite me, with his messy blonde hair, broad shoulders, chiselled jaw... Everything about him was familiar, yet it felt strange to have him so near me again, especially so unexpectedly. 

For the first time, he looked up and met my eyes.  

"What's up? You look like you've seen a ghost." 

I found my voice. "I may as well have! You're supposed to be in Italy!" 

At that, Nathan smiled, finally dropping the casual façade. "Nice surprise?" 

"Why didn't you tell me?" I rubbed at my chest, trying to calm my racing heart. It still hadn't sunk in. 

He frowned slightly, tilting his head to the side as he regarded me with amusement. "Doesn't that defeat the point of a surprise?" 

"So did you plan it with Jess?" 

"Only to a certain extent," he replied with a small smile. "When she first arranged to have this meal with you, she didn't know I was coming back early. When I let her know, she suggested doing this." 

Would it be inappropriate to get up and kiss him in front of all these people? I itched to get out of my chair and wrap my arms around his body, to feel his hands on my hips, my waist, my hair. 

"Are you happy to see me?" he asked.

"I'd be happier if we weren't in the middle of a restaurant. I'm having to restrain myself." 

"I'll look forward to that later." He winked, before turning his eyes back to his menu. "What are you ordering?" 

He slipped back into that casual way of talking, as if we'd actually arranged to be here having a meal together.

"Oh, um, sweet and sour chicken." 

"Nice choice. What do you think...chicken fried rice or chow mein?" 

"Chow mein," I said decisively.  

He snapped his menu shut. "All right then." He placed the booklet neatly down in front of him on the table. "So, how's your holiday been?" 

"It's been okay. Relatively quiet... I've seen Jess a few times. It seems weird without Kat, though." 

Nathan's lips curved into a sympathetic smile but he knew better than to press the topic. "Did it snow here?" he asked instead.  

"Not a flake." I pouted sadly. "Did you enjoy the time with your family?" 

"Yeah," he answered, pouring himself some water. "It was good. I think they're going to come over here next time, though, so you'll get to meet them." 

I smiled at that. "That'd be really good." 

He smiled back and we shared a tender moment during which he reached across the table and took my hand, running his thumb tenderly across my knuckles.  

"It's so good to be close to you again," he told me quietly. "I missed you so much." 

I was about to reply when the waiter showed up, interrupting our moment. We ordered our food but the intimate moment had disappeared and we were soon back to talking about normal stuff, like school, homework and Italy.  

"Remember when we had that conversation about Rome over lunch? I said I'd had enough of living in a city?" he asked me.  

"Yeah, I remember." 

"Well, I guess the novelty is back." 

I grinned. "Did you love it again?" 

"I've always loved Rome, but after living there for a year, then moving away, and then coming back to it... It's almost more impressive than I remembered." 

"I can't imagine ever getting used to Rome," I admitted. "How can you get used to seeing the Colosseum every day?" 

"You can't. It's impossible. It's not exactly your average building." 

Despite my initial shock, once Nathan and I were back into the swing of conversation it felt like we hadn't been away from each other. Everything fell back into place effortlessly and comfortably; it was natural and easy.  

"So, after this, do you want to come back to mine for a bit?" he suggested as our plates were being taken away.  

He said it casually enough, but tension simmered in the air. Every time we'd laughed together during the meal, knocked feet beneath the table, or brushed hands when passing food and drink back and forth, a spark of electricity had flickered in the short gap between us. 

"Sure," I replied, my stomach already fluttering with excitement at the thought of being alone with Nathan after so much time apart. Would tonight be the night..?  

Nathan insisted on paying the bill and then drove us both back to his house. The roads were quiet, allowing for a relatively straightforward and quick drive. That was definitely in our favour... 

"Will you need to phone your mum?" He unlocked the front door and held it open for me to walk through first. 

"No. She'll just assume I'm with Jess." 

"Cool." 

"I half expected her to be in on this little plot, though," I said.

"No," he laughed. "It was just Jess and me, I promise you." 

He shut the door after us and I leant back against the wall, watching him twist the lock.

"I haven't said thank you," I said. "It was a lovely surprise, Nathan. Thank you." 

He closed the short distance between us and wrapped an arm around my waist, drawing me against his body. Warmth rushed through me as I looped my hands around his neck, my fingers tousling his wavy hair.  

"I'm glad you liked it." 

Then he kissed me, pressing me gently up against the wall; I let myself get lost in that kiss, savouring the feel of Nathan after nearly three weeks without him.

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Thank you for reading :)xx