we're so young, but we're on the road to ruin
𐦍༘⋆

FOUR MONTHS LATER
JUNE, 1979

Celeste had never known the excitement of weddings until it was James and Lily's.

The ladies occupied the West Wing of Potter Manor while the boys took the East. They had spent the entire morning together, getting ready for the wedding. Celeste watched in awe as Lily entered the dressing room donning an ivory silk dress. It was graceful and elegant, making her features seem to glow more than usual.

Marlene had perfected everyone's makeup and was now in a corner panicking over her own before a mirror. Alice had fashioned all their hairstyles, including Mrs. Potter's.

Celeste hugged her arms tightly against her beaded bodice, smiling weakly at it all. On most days, her wedding still haunted her. Flashes of the agony and glamour came back to her in a blur.

She forced herself to push it away, pulling all her attention onto Marlene. She was just about to laugh and come to her aid when she froze. Celeste looked again at that same corner, and found Emmeline Vance sitting there instead. Her complexion and gold hair had tricked her into thinking it was Marls.

This had been happening for a while now. Celeste saw Marlene's face in every nearly place ― a silent echo that constantly followed her around. Her death always felt fresh in her mind, as though she were still all around. At times like these, Celeste would forget that she was gone.

And then Celeste recalled that she hadn't even started on her makeup yet. It only seemed natural for the task to have gone to Marlene. It's what she would've done.

If she had been here.

Celeste swallowed tightly and looked away. She refused to break ― especially not on Lily's wedding day. She would hold herself with all the poise and strength she could muster. She sat at her vanity, staring back at her smiling face. She picked up the jar of skin tint, ignoring her trembling hands. Again and again, through the blush and eyeshadow, she persisted and resisted against it all.

-

The ceremony was gorgeous. Held in the gardens of the manor, Lily slowly walked down the grassy aisle that was covered by a carpet of white petals. She was smiling so ecstatically that Celeste was in awe at the mere joy of it all. She blinked back tears, knowing that she was desperately praying for a day like this for her own.

She glanced to the other side of the aisle, past a sniffling James and found Sirius. He was James' best man, standing behind him with a proud grin. Remus and Peter stood beside Sirius, all of them with matching expressions. It was rare for all of them to be gathered together these days outside of the Order. But for James and Lily, nobody would dare be absent today.

The group of guests was small, but brimming with loved ones. Classmates and professors alike filled the rows. Lily's family was hiding near the back ― but their eyes were all glassy with tears. Professor McGonagall sat up at the front, dabbing her wet eyes with a handkerchief. 

But despite the mix of emotions, they all glowed with pride for the couple.

Alice leaned over and lowered her voice to a whisper. "How long until Lily starts crying?"

Celeste watched as Lily joined James at the altar, clasping their hands together. She grinned. "Somewhere in the middle of the vows."

"I think it'll be when she sees the rings," Alice giggled.

"Five galleons."

Alice winked, leaning back. "You're on."

In the end, Alice was right. Lily burst into tears the moment the rings were presented, the realization sinking in that she was truly getting married. Then the vows were exchanged in a blur of laughter and weeping, and James pulled Lily in for a sweet kiss. Whooping and cheering, the loud party moved over to the reception that was set up at the front of the house.

It was held under a large tent, with glowing candles and wisteria suspended beneath the silk ceiling. Round tables surrounded a dance floor and Lily and James stood at the center, quietly and gently swaying with the music. James whispered something in her ear and she blushed, kissing his cheek.

James frowned and seemed to say something along the lines of, "You missed."

Lily was laughing, and the image of the two was so pure and lovely that the world seemed to hold its breath for them. Celeste watched, entirely mesmerized by the scene as Sirius joined her side. She glanced at him, noticing the glass of fizzing liquid that he held. It was a dark amber color ― close enough to champagne.

He smirked. "Want it?"

"Obviously," she snorted, snatching it away. She downed half the glass, feeling high on exhilaration. Then the sour taste of the drink settled on her tongue and she gagged. She grimaced, shoving the drink back into his waiting hands. "What the hell is that?"

Sirius drank the rest of it, fighting off an amused grin. "Fire whiskey and dragon brandy."

"It's horrible," Celeste shuddered and glared at him. "You knew and you still gave it to me!"

"Well you wanted it!" Sirius protested, holding his hands up in innocence.

Celeste took a glass of champagne from a nearby tray and drained it in an instant. She wrinkled her nose, her head slightly dizzy. "You offered."

Sirius laughed and extended his arm. "Wanna dance?"

Fighting back her grin, she rolled her eyes. "You never need to ask me that."

The pair joined the dance floor, receiving a scatter of light applause. They fell into a waltz, staying in time as though it were a second nature. In a way, it was like they were transported back to that very first night in August of 1977 ― back to that late summer ball before everything had unravelled.

This time, however, neither of them felt so restrained. Rather than the critical eyes of high society, this time it was the adoring eyes of friends and family. As Sirius spun her around, Celeste laughed, throwing her head back as though she were just a girl again.

Her gown of silk chiffon glittered with crystal and glass beads, shining with an angelic air. The mossy greens and blues of the dress melted together like the summer waters of Ibiza. The floaty, ruffled hems fluttered around her in a way that made her look both elegant and youthful. For even more dramatic flair, her hands gleamed with gold and sapphire rings.

Sirius only gazed at her face, bewitched all over again. The way his eyes fixed onto her soul made her heart thunder.

They continued, song after song as the floor became more and more crowded. It felt like if the moment stopped, they would never have it again. The moment would be gone, lost forever.

They whispered sweet nothings to each other, hands and fingers tangled together. The boy and girl clung to each other like one and only lifelines, their hearts broken and bruised from the world they lived in. They stopped their performance and just held each other, softly swaying.

Halfway through the night, Dorcas and Mary Macdonald had taken over the sound system; obnoxiously blaring Voulez-Vous through the speakers. The party cheered and sang with an overwhelming ecstasy, twirling each other around. The song melted into Killer Queen, and Celeste instantly ran to drag Remus into the crowd. They bellowed the lyrics and danced the same way they had on that very first night at Hogwarts. They threw their arms over each other's shoulders, shouting their throats hoarse.

Celeste's heart was so full she wondered if it might burst. She shut her eyes, soaking it all in. She felt so spectacularly safe and loved, within the tight crowd of friends. She gazed at Lily and Alice, who were hollering in each other's faces. She laughed at Remus and Sirius, who were now chugging down bottles of whiskey. She spied James attempting to lift Peter in the air, a foolish grin across his face.

Celeste swallowed thickly, her eyes welling with tears. She prayed that wherever Marlene was, she was at peace. Content.

She promise vengeance and justice for her beloved best friend and blinked away her tears. She burned away her past lives and deserted all the terror of her history. Celeste Malfoy recognized herself at last ― no longer a tormented and traumatized woman ― but a survivor.

She refused to remain a story untold. She would not be defined by lies, by those that had wronged her. History was written by survivors, and she was surely that.

She had so much left to lose. So much worth to fling at the world. Best of all, she was still a Malfoy ― still every bit as powerful as she'd known all her life. How had she allowed herself to struggle for so long? Why had she let herself be written by cynical clones and worthless men?

I'm going to kill you, she had once vowed to Evan. I am a Malfoy heiress. I can ruin you as quickly as I raised you.

She recalled those words, a greater understanding resounding within her soul. She had already told herself this, but hadn't been truly listening. Those were the words of an oath. An oath that Celeste Malfoy intended to keep.

Celeste looked to the stars, finally finding faith in the world again.

-

Drunk on joy, Celeste stumbled through the crowd with a wide grin. She aimed for the drinks table, when a figure bumped into her.

"Oh!" Celeste said in surprise. She turned, meeting the face of Olivia Dolos and her smile wavered. "Sorry."

"It's alright," Olivia smiled. She looked pretty tonight; wearing a simple but modest dress of pastel pinks. Her blonde hair was pinned into a neat updo, and a small pair of diamonds dangled at her ears. She held a flute of champagne, and for some strange reason, her hands were trembling.

Celeste frowned. "Are you alright?"

Olivia nodded hastily, glancing to the side. "I'm fine, thanks."

The dizziness she had felt earlier tripled in pain, and Celeste winced. It was that stupid drink Sirius gave her―

Celeste halted as the headache and blur vanished. She blinked once, looking at Olivia strangely. There was something wrong, something horribly wrong. It was the same empty feeling she had that morning after the Death Eater's ball. She tried to inhale and exhale slowly, and her vision focused on Olivia, who was now darting away in panic.

Beneath the makeup and concealment charms, the faint scar on her face suddenly began burning. Celeste staggered back, leaning on a random chair for support. She looked to her right, seeing a tray of champagne and then looked to her left, where Olivia had darted in the dark gardens.

The memories burst in her head, exploding as though they had been confided and chained away for a very long time. They felt fresh and new, as though it had only just happened.

Olivia was shoving her ― glass was raining down on her―"You're a fraud and a cheat... tied to your disgusting family!" ― there were shrieking guests and spiked champagne ― "you play both sides!"

Celeste sucked in a breath, the scenes flashing before her eyes. She narrowed her eyes in the directed that Olivia had darted away towards and started walking.

"Tell me," Olivia was whispering softly. "What the fuck did you do?"

She was walking faster now, storming out of the tent and into the shadows of the night. The faint rustle of leaves and running came from afar, and Celeste did not stop pushing forward.

Liquid ― blood had been running down her arm. "I will carve into your skin until I get it out of you!"

Celeste was running down, through a path of roses and down a hall of tall hedges. "Olivia!" she shouted angrily, breathing heavily. "Where are you?"

She was met with silence and the faint laughter and chatter from the party behind her. Celeste took a tentative step forward, wary of all the dark corners that surrounded her. She looked around and spied a thick oak tree; a piece of fuschia fabric peeking out from behind.

Celeste swallowed, pretending to still be searching. "Olivia?" she called, taking another step. "Olivia!"

As she neared the tree, she could hear the muffled breathing of Olivia. She was trembling, tightly pressing her hand to her mouth.

Clenching her jaw, Celeste lurched forward and yanked her arm towards her. Olivia shriek was cut off as the pair were instantly apparated away.

AUTHOR'S NOTE

god I relate to Celeste so much it hurts. Sometimes it's just so difficult to get her thought process out in words cause I just think emotions are wayyy too complex and strong for little words to hold their depth???

Also I'm applauding myself for not using "star" or "starlight" in Celeste dress description djfhskfh. It was inspired by the Moonshine dress by Annie's Ibiza. It's so gorgeous and I need it in my life.

I realized how deep Marlene and Celeste's connection really was while writing this chapter. Grief is hard to understand, and harder to write. I really hope I did them justice.

xx, aria