Chapter Nineteen

Delilah passed away at the end of winter.

But, thanks to my presence during the birth, the babe survived.

I could have saved Delilah, I knew that. I could have brought her soul back to us, but I didn't. For so many reasons, the most important being that the Source had simply told me to refrain from it. I was unsure how I had heard it, how I had felt it, but as I sat there upon my knees in the cabin with Lucifer weeping beside me, cradling his squalling infant son in his arms, I was certain that it was not my duty to bring Delilah back.

I did not dare act out against the Source's wishes. Twas not so much fear, so much trust. I trusted the Source to care for her, to love her as they loved all their children. However, it was an immense tragedy to watch father and son both weep as if their hearts were shattered beyond repair.

It'd taken weeks to convince Lucifer to take care of his son, whom he had named Jaques, as Delilah had willed it before her passing. It was a name of strength, just as her son was predicted to be. While he screamed the entire first day in this new universe, he was quiet the rest of the days. He was an oddly patient child, waiting for his father to come fetch him for his feedings of milk and honey.

And he looked so much like his mother. A tuft of black hair, sparse and flat, a pair of massive blue eyes that swallowed a chubby cherub face, little hands snatching anything put within the vicinity of them.

And he grew fast, this one.

While his blood was partly his mother's, simple human genetics, the rest of his blood was overrun with his father's angelic bloodline. He grew healthy quickly. He was already thinking in pictures, bright and clear as day. And most often, his mind was filled with pictures of his father. Twas a pity that none of them were truly happy pictures, as Lucifer had become extremely depressed since Delilah's passing.

Even with his son always in his arms, or cradled in a protective sling over his shoulders, Lucifer lived and breathed on nothing but basic survival. He ate slowly, the movements automatic, as if he were not truly present in them. He slept very little, what with Jaques needing frequent changing and bathing and general tending.

And his wonder, too, began to fade. He no longer looked upon the trees with fascination, or the snow, or birds. He cared not for sunsets or sunrises. He was dying inside, all over again. And what a misery it was, to see all Delilah's hard work unfolding itself before my very eyes.

"Lucifer," I said, making Lucifer blink and look up from feeding Jaques his bottle, and those blue eyes were dark and tired, purple circles forming under his bottom lid from lack of sleep, "You're hurting Jaques, and you're hurting yourself. Delilah would never have wanted this for you." Lucifer blinked slowly, then turned his head away to stare blankly at the river that trickled on by. Insects hummed and buzzed, flying and leaping along the riverside, grass swaying in the gentle wind.

The heat of summer was upon us. Birds flew to and fro, animals slinking through the trees, the trees overhead brilliant shades of green and the grass so vividly bright green. Flowers bloomed in the clearing in which we sat on the fallen tree, in the same place where Lucifer had finally told me the truth of him, his fall, and his curse.

It'd been so long since Delilah had passed now.

Yet the pain of her passing still lingered in Lucifer's heart as he watched the river with vague awareness of his surroundings, and his fingers were loosening their grip on the bottle in Jaques's mouth.

"Lucifer." My voice snapped him from his trance and he tightened his grip on the bottle again.

"What?" His voice was sharp now. Jaques sniffled, sputtering against the nipple of his bottle, and he burst into screeching sobs. Lucifer cursed and set the bottle aside, hoisting Jaques closer against his chest and cradling him. It was too fast, however, and Jaques only wailed louder.

"Let me hold him," I said. Lucifer stiffened.

"Why?"

"Lucifer, you need rest. You've not slept since Delilah passed. You cannot possibly care for Jaques in this state. Sooner or later, you will faint and you could drop him. You can trust me with your child, Lucifer." Lucifer studied my face, swallowing hard. I watched unshed tears glimmer in those blue eyes, red rimming his lids and a brief sniff followed. He reluctantly held Jaques toward me. I drew close to settle the child in my arms, and Lucifer hesitated to let go.

I looked into his eyes and he swallowed hard again. He slowly moved his arms away and quickly wrapped them around himself. I drew Jaques close to my chest, supporting his small body with my arm and wrapping him more snuggly in his blanket, the one Delilah had made for him before her passing. A lovely patchwork blanket with numerous patterns that should have clashed, yet seemed to fit together beautifully in their octagonal designs.

I touched my finger to Jaques's forehead and his squalling stopped. He blinked open big teary blue eyes, gazing up at me, his lower lip quivering. I smiled down at him. I felt no need to speak, however, and simply pictured images of Lucifer, back when he'd been with Delilah, happy and delighted by everything. The pictures went to Jaques, and those big blue eyes grew wide with joy and he smiled, putting his hands together over and over again in a soundless clap.

I looked up to tell Lucifer he'd done well with this child, but remained silent when I realized Lucifer had fallen asleep. Slumped over on his side, laying against the tree trunk with his hair splayed out and his body curled up. I smiled briefly, turning back to Jaques, holding a finger to my lips. I gave him an image of Lucifer sleeping and Jaques giggled.

I smiled down at him, brushing my thumb past his soft little cheek.

How precious this child was. A true gift, Delilah's final gift to the universe before she went unto the Source. I made a silent vow to protect this child with everything I had, not only for Delilah, but for Lucifer as well. For this child, and any more that Lucifer chose to have.

The world was dark, and it was cold, and it could be so terribly lonely. With an ancient war drifting towards the edge, with sin darkening the hearts of the many, with evil lurking around every corner.

This child was the epitome of goodness. And now, I realized, I had an answer to Lucifer's question so long ago...

Could there be pure goodness in this world?

"Yes, Lucifer," I murmured, watching Jaques yawn and snuggle back down into his blanket for slumber, "You have pure goodness. Right here. Right now."

Some time passed. Several years, maybe more. Jaques had grown, but was still yet a child. He barely reached my midsection, his midnight black hair reaching just past his ears, blue eyes bright and fascinated by everything. He was highly intelligent for his age. I had expected a child who would be much like Nyx and Erebus had been; picking their noses, playing in mud, pretending ugly frogs could speak. Yet, Jaques had done none of those things. He would sit for hours sprawled in the grass, gazing up at the clouds. He would crawl after insects for no other reason than to watch them. He'd scale trees high overhead. He adored the deck of cards his mother had left behind for him and Lucifer spent time teaching him the tricks Delilah had taught him.

Lucifer was looking better these days. His face had brightened, his sleep returning steadily. His heart was still broken, still aching, but at least now he smiled truly and he poured all his love into his son. And so, too, had something else caught his attention...

"This realm needs order," Lucifer said, and when I glanced up with an arched brow, he shook his head, "No, nothing like my Father's order. But it needs some sort of structure. As things are now, there is violent chaos, not free chaos. It's dangerous and it frightens me to think that we should be living in a place where my son is not safe." His concern was understandable. Even with Jaques in tow, the bandits took no mercy on us. If anything, having a tiny angelic child with us was even more of a lure to bandits.

And we'd just killed three such groups this past week alone.

And the last time, Jaques had gotten away with a scratch to his cheek and Lucifer's fear had mounted since then.

Still, the idea of reining in a realm like Hell? It was a massive job that two males and a child could not accomplish alone.

"Lucifer," I said slowly, "Mayhap it would be best to simply move to another realm. There is the realm of Hades, a Greek dwelling, but safer than here. Or there is Duat. I am old friends with one of the gods there. Surely he would be open to accepting us there." Lucifer shook his head, lowering his hot mug of tea to the table.

"I wish not to leave this realm. St. John, this realm is beautiful," he murmured, studying his tea, rubbing his thumb up and down the side as if he were envisioning the realm we'd trekked through for years, "It is here that I meant the love of my life. It is here that I received the greatest gift any creature could be blessed with. This realm has potential to be beautiful, to be great. And I have heard things of the Greeks and the Egyptians that makes me weary to bring Jaques there."

He made a good point, about everything. This realm was beautiful. Untouched by brutal savage wars, only simple territorial disputes and the natural chaos of criminals and rejects trying to find their place in the world. He was not the only one who loved this realm. I, too, had come to love this land. I'd seen it through my eyes, through Lucifer's, and through Jaques's.

And it was true; the Greeks were currently in a great struggle of their own. A civil war had commenced, and not long after the Atlanteans had disappeared off the face of the universe. I had attempted to contact Satanika, or rather, Aphrodite, but I had not received word from her. I had reached out to other contacts, and I knew only rumors that supposedly Atlan had angered the wrong person, and the Source had swallowed them up.

It was nerve wracking. Surely he wasn't permanently gone. That was impossible. The great warrior, the savior, hadn't arrived yet. He was in this world, surely, but he was surely nothing more than a child still. Not the wise soldier that had come unto me in my dream with his angel.

An attempt to contact the Source had only resulted in the soothing hum of its power, assuring me things were taking the course they were meant to. I was unsure of any details, for the Source never revealed such things, but I accepted the answer as gracefully as I could.

For I still had to follow mine own destiny, and that was to help Lucifer.

And now Lucifer wished to create civilization in Hell. A new order, new laws, and with such, new leadership.

"Say we decide to do this," I said slowly, watching Lucifer perk up eagerly to hear my words, and I leaned forward on the table, "Who shall lead? How do you plan to bring a realm known for its untamed masses into heel? Do you truly think all would agree upon such? They have fled their own realms for just such a reason, have they not?" Lucifer frowned.

"No," he replied, "They fled from realms in which they were not welcome. They fled from persecution for nothing more than being different. They left behind lives, families, dreams, in order to find new ones. Here. In Hell. Other beings speak of Hell as nothing more than a pit of misery and woe, but it is nothing of the sort. It is full of lost beings. Creatures attempting to find purpose. And we can help them, we can help all of them, as you have helped me, find their purpose. Find solid ground. Find safety. Shelter. Love. Hopes. Dreams." His words certainly were inspirational, and I even found myself enjoying the idea of once again joining a civilized realm.

"But you've not answered my other questions," I pointed out, "How do you plan to go about such a massive undertaking? You cannot simply travel and tell people you are suddenly their leader. Something tells me it won't go quite as planned and I rather not continue my journey with an orphan." Lucifer frowned for a moment, then took a deep breath, patting the table.

"Then we shall discuss this. Right here. Right now. We shall form an army. Not of violence, but of protection, of strength, of creatures willing to put forth the effort to create a society here in Hell. We will announce our presence. We will give creatures the right to leave if they wish, or stay if they wish. We will form laws, together. This realm will be ruled by a council. A council of handpicked dignitaries." I nodded slowly, committing his words to memory as he began to explain his plan, explain his dream, not only for himself and Jaques, but for the whole of this realm.