The thunder crashed loud and horrifying. The lightning came down far away from here and yet my heart beats like I just run a marathon. I hate storms. When I was a child my mom let my play outside and I loved it.
Being outside was an adventure for someone as small as me, even our tiny backyard seemed like a big world full of mysteries waiting for me and only me. I climbed the highest trees, crawled through the grass, ran after butterflies and imaged flying away with them. And when the sun set I went home and told my mom everything I experimented. I loved talking to her, she always smiled when she listened to me. And her smile was the most beautiful thing in the world just like her. I never liked talking, whenever I was around other people I was the quiet one in the background. But she was different, she made me talk without even trying. It was like she had a spark deep inside, something that made her different, but also beautiful and so full of life. Maybe that was the reason Dad loved her and that's why he didn't loved me, cause I wasn't like her, not a tiny bit. So after her death I moved inside my head, Dad and I only talk about the essential.

I don't even have friends, except of HER.

Well, I don't know if I could consider HER a friend. She is the only one talking to me. I never asked why, but I wondered. At first I never answered when she would talk to me, but at some point I couldn't help and talked. I didn't told her about me, but I asked questions, just a few, but when I did her eyes sparkled. So I kept doing, I kept asking questions just to see that spark. It was the same spark my mom had. And that scared me, that and the fact that I started getting attached to her, I wanted to tell her about me, my dad, my life and my mom. I never told anyone about my mom. She was my secret, the most weren't worth knowing her, they wouldn't get her beauty. Just like they didn't get HER beauty.
That's probably why she was an outcast... just like me.

Another loud crash pulled me back to reality. My whole body jerked, but it didn't matter. I promised my grandma to help her today. She just lived like 4 blocks away, but still the thought of going out there, makes me cringe. However whining wouldn't change something, so I started running.

They rain soon got me soaked. But I couldn't stop. I just ran, like all my fears would disappear when I did. Luckily it worked, till a lightning came down just about a block away, instantly I lost the control of my body completely. I couldn't move at all shaking out of fear. I wanted to scream, I wanted to cry, but nothing worked as I wanted. Suddenly someone grabbed me and pulled me with them.

"What the heck were you doing out there?" SHE looks at me with an angry expression, at least she is trying to. Even so I was still shaking and to scared to answer. She noticed instantly and put off her jacket to place it around me. Her brown eyes showed concern. Something inside of me felt suddenly warm. It was a nice feeling, but it made me back away, feeling something means you can get hurt and that scared me!

"Hey, everything is fine! I am here! And I won't go anywhere!"
She slowly pet my back calming me down. My whole body started to relax, I slowly won the control back. I look around noticing that we were under a roofed house entry.
"Do you want to come upstairs?" She asked while studying my face. Embarrassed I turned away, I don't want her to look at me. I don't want her to realize what a ugly unsocial loser was standing in front of her!
But nevertheless I nodded, I needed to get away from the storm.

She opened the door and let me inside, then she pulled me upstairs. Her apartment was on the second floor. It wasn't really big, but pretty comfy. There was a bedroom, a bath and the living room paired with the kitchen. She ordered me to sit on the couch, while she started doing something in the kitchen. I didn't know what to do, so I stayed quiet, so did she. I tried to look around and study the room, but no matter how hard I tried, my eyes always went back to her.

Her clothes were more then wet and sticked on her body, her beautiful body. This accented her curves more than I'd liked it to. Her long and wet red hair framed her face, it was beautiful. I mean her hair AND her face. I loved the fiery red tone of her hair, it matched with the color of her soft lips. Don't get me wrong, I don't know if they are soft, but I think so, they look like that and I would give my life to find out.

I shook my head, these thoughts are so wrong! Everytime they cross my mind I feel guilty, I feel like I would take advantage of her by looking at her and feeling all those things without her knowing.

"There you go!" I almost jumped, her voice pulled me back to reality. She was standing right in front of me holding two cups of hot chocolate.
She smiled down to me and sat down next to me handing me one cup.
"You are so cute sometimes!"
My heart beat faster in my chest, but suddenly I felt the urge play along. "Sometimes?"
Right after I said that I regretted it. What was wrong with me? Why can't I just stay quiet! Usually that's the thing I do the best: To stay quiet...

Unexpected she started to giggle, relieved I did the same. "Okay, Okay, all the time!" She stopped laughing and looked at me unblushing. I tried to not look in her eyes, so I ended up noticing that her cleavage was showing a bit to much. At the point I was blushing with shame and scooted away from her.

In just that moment loud thunder disturbed the peace of the room. I shrieked wincing in fear. Instantly she grabbed me engulfing me in a hug.
"Hey, everything is fine! I am here! Right by your side!" Her voice was as calming as my moms and for the first time in ages I felt safe.

It took a few minutes to normalize, but when I felt better, she let go me! Some part of me wanted her to never let go, to just stay like that forever, but that wasn't possible...

"Are you afraid of storms?" I just nod not being able to more. "Can I ask why?" I thought about this for forever, I never told anyone, but something about her made me trust her. I hesitantly started:
"My m-mom...", but my voice cracked.
I felt her heat once more while she pulled me in another hug.
"You don't have to talk about it!"
Then nobody said anything. Just the two of us, the hot chocolates and the sound of pouring rain.

"She had an accident with her car in a storm!" She just nodded striking out the tears that poured down my face.
She didn't said that she was sorry, she didn't said that everything is going to be fine, she just hugged me and it was the best thing she could have done.

After a while I the tears stopped falling and I was able to look up. When I did so I met her beautiful brown eyes that were pierced on me. Was she staring at me? I lightly blush, but I don't look away and neither does she... So we stay in our position.

We are so close that me heart began to beat unnaturally fast, I hope that she doesn't noticed. She could be disgusted and then she would never look at me again with those wonderful eyes, so deep brown that it is hard to tell where the iris stops. They are so mesmerizing that I it is almost impossible to focus on something else, till I notice the little dots on her cheeks.

She has freckles! I didn't thought that she could get any more adorable or hot, but she did. To be fair, I always had a weak spot for freckles. They look like little constellations. It is almost hypnotizing, I start to connect them to form little pictures, but my eyes eventually land on her lips.

I just want to lean in and kiss her, everything insides me screams DO IT!
I slowly lean forward till I feel her breath, I could have sworn that she came closer as well, but I backed away. I can't let that happen, I know that I am not enough for her, she is probably straight, I can't do this, I don't want to loose her too!

I lean back and turn away, my gaze back on the decoration on the table.
When I see her move awkwardly, before standing up. I look surprised up to her, she just walks over to the chair next to the couch, but still far enough away from me. It feels like something stabbed my heart, but I don't say anything. If she knows about my feelings, I won't make her more uneasy than she already is.

But instead of looking disgust I see something in her eyes I would call sorrow... She looked hurt, before I can ask what is wrong, she sobs, but still manages to speak.
"I am sorry, I think I misunderstood the situation!" She looks down to the ground, her wet hair falling in front of that heavenly face. But the worst part is that her spark is not there anymore, like it got lost... "What are you talking about?"

She slowly lifts her head up: "I am sorry, You were upset, we were so close and you opened up to me, you actually told me something about yourself and then your freaking stunning eyes looked in my and I am so sorry, that I tried to kiss you! It was stupid! And it won't happen again!" My heart rate starts to raise again when I realize what she said.

"And what if it happens again?" I ask, trying to hide a small grin. I don't know what came inside me, usually I never would never be as confident as now.

"It won't! I swear! I can control myself!" I heard a small sob again and my heart dropped for a small moment. I stand up and sit next to her, at least I try to...

Then I whisper... "Too bad!" She finally looks up to me making my heart melt immediately. Her eyes are red, small tears hidden. It it as heartbreaking and yet such adorable view. Before I can think about it I close the gap between us.

Our lips move in perfect synchro and after a few seconds she pulls me closer, she doesn't care about me wet clothes just like I don't care about her wet hair. All I care about is the amazing feeling of her lips, which by the way are really the softest things I ever touched, on mine...

At some point we have to pull away to breath and the moment I lost her touch, the bit self confidence I had is gone, but when I look at her it doesn't matter. She is smiling again, no, she is smiling brighter than ever before.
And there it is, the spark!

It is her smile... Her smile is the spark that keeps me alive! She keeps me alive...

And I love her... with all my heart...!