I don't know how long I had been in the passage when the door opened and the light streamed in to reveal Angel in the doorway. The play on lighting made him look like some sort of guardian Angel.

"Kira?" he said when he approached me slowly like he would a frightened animal.

He bent down to level his eyes with mine. I didn't know what to say, I had no words to explain what I had seen. He reached out and touched my cheek gently. He looked tired.

"Bruno?" My throat felt so dry as I waited for his answer.

"He is fine. The doc is busy stitching him up. None of the bullets hit any organs."

It was unbelievable, Bruno was going to be fine. It had to be some sort of miracle, surely. Just the amount of blood he had lost should have been enough to put him in a very grave condition.

"But there was so much blood."

He nodded. "Let me take you upstairs," he said softly.

I nodded and he helped me to my feet. The young man who had given me the sugar water hovered just inside the study.

"I've got her Jack" Angel said and Jack nodded. He closed the entrance to the passage as Angel led me to the doors.

I stopped when I realized where he wanted to go. "I can't go back out there." I shook my head, and felt like I was going to go into a full blown panic attack.

He took me by the shoulders. "It's been cleaned up."

I breathed deeply, fighting against the panic to turn in the opposite direction.

"I'm going to open the door and we are going to head straight to the stairs. Okay?"

I nodded slowly, trying to keep my panic at bay. He put his arm around me and held me close as he opened the door. I concentrated on following his lead and each step I took. I kept my gaze fixed straight ahead, trying to avoid anything that could set me off again.

My relief was palpable when we made it to the landing and then he surprised me by leading me to his room and not mine.

But I still too shaken to question him. For the first time I could remember I allowed him to take control which I never thought I would ever do but these were extenuating circumstances.

"I got to shower. Are you going to be okay here for a little while?" he asked as began to unbutton his shirt.

My eyes were fixed on the dry blood mark on his face and the blood stains on his shirt. I breathed through the thought that he was covered in someone's blood.

I nodded. "I'm fine." That wasn't the complete truth but I couldn't stand to see Bruno's blood on him. I tried not to think about the sight of the pools of blood on the kitchen floor.

He studied me for several seconds. "You're not going to disappear as soon as I turn my back?" Clearly he believed I was still a flight risk.

"I won't." I felt safe with him. It was on the tip of my tongue but I didn't say it.

"I won't be long. Make yourself comfortable."

I watched him head to the adjoining bathroom and he closed the door. I heard the shower start.

I looked around his room. The last time I had been his room had been the night I had tried to seduce him, it reminded me of my fledgling feelings for him and how swiftly he had crushed them.

I had no idea what time it was but I felt so tired. The adrenaline that had carried me through everything had waned and I was left exhausted. My eyes went to the inviting pillows. He said I could make myself comfortable. I lay down on his bed and allowed my head to sink into a fluffy pillow. I lay on my side listening to the sound of the water running.

I stared across the room when I heard the water stop. A few minutes later Angel appeared with a towel wrapped around his waist. Droplets dropped from his wet hair.

"You okay?" he asked softly.

I wanted to tell him I was fine but I couldn't. The thought of being on my own tonight scared me a little.

"I've never...seen anything like that and I'm not sure I can be alone tonight," I admitted, unsure of how he would handle that. I hated being needy.

"You can sleep here with me." There was only gentle understanding.

"Thank you." I was relieved he wasn't going to make me go back to my room.

He headed into the walk in closet I moved beneath the covers. He returned dressed in a pair of boxer shorts.

He got into the bed with me and lay on his back. Then he switched the light off. I wanted to move closer but I didn't.

"You shouldn't have seen what did you tonight." His tone was clipped, like in some way he was angry with me for going downstairs.

There was no going back and wiping my memory clean. I had seen it and I had to deal with it somehow. I wasn't sure if he was concerned about what I saw because I saw too much or because he cared that it had upset me so intensely. With him, I couldn't tell.

"What happened?" I asked. Who had shot him?

"It's better if you don't know."

I lifted myself up onto my elbow. "You have to let me in. If I'm going to share this life with you, you can't shut me out."

We might not be in love but if we had any chance this marriage working we had to be able to trust each other because without that we had nothing.

He pressed his lips together for a moment. "This is never going to be a conventional marriage Kira, we don't need love or trust. There will always be things I cannot share with you, it's to protect us both."

He didn't trust me. I could sense it. Is that how he had stayed in power for so long, being selective over the people he trusted? He trusted James but not me. I didn't like how that made me feel and I don't why I cared so much about it either. Maybe it was because I trusted him in a way he couldn't seem to trust me.

"Over the next week I want James to go through all the security measures in place. So the next time something like this happens you wont see it."

I frowned. "What do you mean?"

"I don't want you near any of this. If you hear anything suspicious you are to go straight to the panic room under no circumstances do you go and investigate. Do you hear me?"

I trembled. "Why?"

"It's to keep you safe."

"What if it had been you shot tonight?" I asked, not liking the idea of something like that happening to him although there were a few times I had wanted to throttle him.

"It doesn't matter, who it is. You do as you're told."

His wording rubbed me completely the wrong way and I could feel myself bristle in retaliation.

"So I'm just supposed to be this obedient wife that just does as she is told without asking any questions?" I couldn't be near him, I was too afraid I would slap him so I climbed out of the bed.

"Kira. Where are you going?" he asked.

"Where there are no chauvinistic pigs!" I threw at him as I opened his bedroom door and left, making sure to slam him door shut. He had to know how angry he had just made me.

My temper outweighed any remaining fears that would keep me a minute longer in his company.

Back in my room, I slammed the door closed. Hoping he could hear it too. And paced. I was so mad I wanted to hit something.

"Ugh," I said out loud to get rid of the frustration of having to deal with someone so set his ways there was so room to negotiate with him.

What had I got myself into? I was going to have a husband who was just going to treat me like some weak person who couldn't handle anything. Although I hadn't exactly handled what I had witnessed today well but that didn't mean I couldn't handle anything.

I would find a way to toughen up. This was my life now and I had to adjust accordingly. I would show him I was not damsel in distress, and that I could look after myself.

I was disappointed that I hadn't handled tonight well but I was going to show him the next time I could handle anything his gangster life could throw at me. My determination was stronger than any weakness I felt.

This would be a battle and I was ready for fight.

I couldn't spend my life with someone who couldn't see the courage I knew I had. I didn't want someone to protect me or keep me safe. Those were things I wanted to be able to do for myself.

Tomorrow I would show him.