× Mercury

"Would you stop taking pictures of me?"

I grinned as I looked at Harry through my phone screen just as the shutter sound of the camera went off. It was a rare sunny November day in London with white fluffy clouds in the sky and the promise of the weatherman saying there would be no rain. We were sitting on the field of the arena as we spent the nice day outside.

"Oh, hun," Chloe said as she pulled her aviator sunglasses down lower on her nose and looked at Harry. "You should know by now that taking pictures is kind of Lynn's thing. She has an entire folder on her phone with my name on in. And she should. I'm fucking hot."

Jillian and I shared a look as Chloe put her glasses back over her eyes and lied down on the fake grass, soaking up the sun as much as she can before the rain takes over again tomorrow.

It wasn't that Jillian didn't like Chloe; it was more that Chloe just gets under her skin sometimes. I didn't know as much about Chloe as I should being her roommate and all, but from the parts I did know about her, I knew she wasn't very, um, clean. In more ways than one.

Chloe got around. Probably not as much as Niall, but enough to know that when the door to our dorm is closed, that I should always knock just in case something was going on beyond the wood. And she left things behind, too, like used condoms that missed the trash. And that was just one of the many, many things I had found on the floor. I probably wouldn't have minded too much except that I was always the one who had to pick it up (with a long stick I had found outside that I kept under my bed for that very purpose).

So, dirty was definitely a good word to describe Chloe. And Jillian wasn't anything if not a clean freak.

"It's once in a life time that I actually get to see you without skinny jeans," I grinned at him as I put my phone away in my bag.

It was true. Ever since I spent my free time with Harry, I didn't think I had ever seen him in anything other than black skinny jeans. Today was an exception, I guess, because he was sporting some Nike black shorts, a T-shirt, and some bright green shoes that could blind a bird fifty yards away. His unruly, curly brown hair was a mess and his green eyes were covered with black shades.

Jillian picked up the soccer ball between us and started rotating it around in her hands. "Does anyone know how that girl is doing in the hospital?" she asked, looking over at me. "You're the one who found her and called the medics, right?"

"The only thing I know is that she's stabilized," I said.

The memory of Halloween night haunted my dreams - a girl in the shed, trembling with bloodshot eyes - every time I placed my head on my pillow. They were surprisingly welcoming, knowing they were at least a little better than the ones I had been living with the past three years. At least at the end of these new dreams, the victim ends up surviving.

I grabbed the ball from Jillian's fingers and stood up. Harry and Jillian watched as I juggled the ball on my knees and feet, occasionally catching it on the back of my neck and between my knees.

Suddenly, Harry was there and snatching the ball from the air and stepped closer to me. I could feel his breath on my face as he said, "I'm getting a little jealous that you're paying more attention to a football than you are to me."

"Well," I smirked at him. "How about we make things interesting then? If you can make a goal on me, I'll do anything you want me to do. Or vice versa if you don't make the shot."

"Anything I want?" he asked, stepping even closer and leaned down, our noses nearly touching.

I thought for a moment, getting a little sidetracked by Harry's closeness. "Within reason," I added.

"You're on."

Stepping back, I reached down and took off my shirt, throwing it at Jillian who was watching our exchange with curiosity. I knew that if I exposed a little skin and some boobs, that I might have an advantage to distract Harry. And it seemed to work as he ever so subtly gazed over my body, eyes lingering on my bright baby blue sports bra and loose fitting black shorts.

I knew he was still watching as I walked over to the goal at the end of the pitch and took my stance to block his kick.

"Come on, Styles. I don't have all day."

It was easy to see that he regretted taking me on as soon as he started to walk to the penalty box arc. He was still smiling, but it was wavering, knowing damn well that he couldn't possibly take on an almost-pro soccer player. But what he didn't know was that I wasn't trained to be a keeper. Aside from soccer days in high school, I've not once been a goalie. And unfortunately for me, I sucked at it.

So as Harry dropped the ball on the penalty line and took a few steps back, I already knew before the ball came flying at me that I had already lost the gamble. I tried, though. I tried to jump up and grab it, but all my fingers did was graze the ball as I heard the satisfactory sound of it hitting the net behind me.

"You cheated!" I shouted as I started walking towards him.

"Cheated?" he questioned, crossing his arms over his chest. "We didn't even have any rules for me to cheat! Besides, you let me win."

I scuffed at him, but there was a smile on my lips. "No I didn't. I would never let a male beat me on purpose. Ridiculous."

Harry closed the distance between us and suddenly we were face to face again. He had ditched his sunglasses next to Jillian along with my shirt, so his pale green eyes never left mine as his arms wrapped around my body. I felt his hand land on my lower back and start inching, ever so slowly, down to my butt.

"Whether you did or didn't," he said in a low voice. "You still have to do anything I say."

"Within reason," I reminded him.

"We have eyes!" I heard Jillian shout from the sidelines.

I looked over to find her looking up at the lower level of the stands. I followed her gaze and scowled. We were far away, but there was no denying that mop of blonde hair. He had his arms crossed as he leaned against the wall, looking down at us.

The teasing smile on my lips faltered. Harry must have seen who was watching because he was looking at me questionably. He had every right to be concerned, I mean, all you had to do was open up the Lion's Den and see how apparently Niall and I had this "connection". Harry and I didn't know each other long enough for him to know that it was all bullshit, of course.

"Should I go tell him to bugger off?" Jillian asked me.

"No," I said, knowing that Niall wouldn't be here unless necessary. "No, I'll go talk to him. He probably wants something."

I moved out of Harry's arms and left to find my way to a different boy in my life.

× × ×

Something about Niall made me burn whenever I looked at him. Even after all this time, after everything he had done for me, the flicker of a flame was still alive in my bloodstream.

"Don't you have a girl you should be sleeping with?" I asked when I found him in one of the hallways.

He was leaning against a brick wall, arms crossed over his chest, a cocky smirk on his mouth as he looked over me once, and then twice, before his warm eyes locked onto mine.

"I'm not the one lacking a shirt," he observed, reminding me that I had left mine with Jillian on the pitch.

I clenched my jaw in frustration, angry at myself for forgetting that I was only wearing a blue sports bra and shorts. But I refused to let him get to me, not anymore.

So I ignored him and said, "What do you want, Ireland?"

"What makes you think I want anything from you?" he asked. "Not like it's any of your concern, but I actually came here to see Coach."

"Coach's office is down there," I said, pointing down a different hallway.

Niall nodded. "I got distracted."

I only just now realized how soft his hair looked. I mean, I always knew, but that was the first time I actually wanted to reach out and touch it. I knew what it felt like - his locks running through my fingers more times than I wanted to remember - but today it looked extra soft, like he had just gotten out of the shower and did a half-assed job of drying it with a towel before going outside and having the fresh air do the rest.

"So have you and Harry done it yet?" he suddenly asked. He was looking out at the stadium a few feet away. Jillian and Harry were passing the soccer ball back and forth, Chloe still lying on her back at the sidelines. "I mean, you two have been together forever."

I laughed, but there wasn't any humor in it. "You and I obviously have a different definition of the word forever and very different ideas of sex."

The smirk on Niall's face didn't waver as he took a couple of steps toward me. "Sex isn't an idea; it's something you do when you're attracted to someone."

"No, it's something you do when you like someone."

"Same thing."

I squared my shoulders and stood my ground as Niall closed the space between us, using his height advantage to intimidate me.

"Attraction and love are not the same," I glared. "Even you're not that senseless."

"And you're not that naive. You don't have to be in love to have sex, you just need a condom."

Clenching my jaw, I glowered at him. He didn't even realize what he had said, but it was all too real for me. With Bradley, that was exactly it. All he needed was a condom and a little bit of anger to make it okay for him to have sex with someone. I had always just been an "attraction" in Bradley's eye.

"A real relationship is about getting to know someone on a level deeper than sex," I pressed.

"Real relationship?" Niall snorted like it was the biggest joke of his life. He took a quick glance at the field once again before looking back at me. "Like the kind where you release your soul and let them see the real you? Slut shame me all you want, but how real can the relationship be if you're not even comfortable in it."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"You know what."

Was he talking about Harry and me? That I didn't feel comfortable in the relationship we were in, or was this something entirely different and I was missing the double meaning behind his words? Harry and I weren't even, really, in a relationship. Dating, maybe, but not exclusive.

Before I could demand answers, Niall was suddenly pulling me into his chest and backing up against the wall, his large hand clamped over my mouth. I struggled against him, but his other arm was wrapped firmly around my bare waist to keep me pressed up against him. At first I thought it was an act of spontaneous covetousness (something he did often, evidently), except he wasn't paying any attention to me, and instead to the voices I had just now noticed around the corner.

"-not worried about Lynn and Niall?"

I tensed up from the sound of my name just as Niall's hand on my back pressed me closer to him, if that was even possible. I knew that voice from somewhere, but for the life of me I couldn't place it.

"No, I'm not worried, Ben. I don't have any reason to be."

Coach. That voice definitely belonged to Coach Mathews, but even from the name of the other person, I was still left dumbfounded as to who it was.

"No reason to be?" the mystery voice accused. "Have you not read anything since she joined your team? I thought you had a rule, Aaron, that no one was to get infatuated with the girl."

"And no one is!" Coach nearly shouted. "And it's the tabloids, is anything they say even real? They're twisting everything those two kids say to make it into something they want: drama. That's what they do. Unless I get solid proof that there is something going on between my two star players, then there is nothing to discuss. You have a wedding coming up; this should not be your biggest concern at the moment."

I had known Coach for a while now, I knew that he could be a hard-ass if his players were acting stupid or aren't putting their all into something, so I didn't doubt he would act the same way to anyone else if his team was threatened.

"I'm the chancellor of this school, Aaron, something I think you often forget," the other voice said and my eyes widened. "So when I think there's something worth looking into, you might find it wise to look into it."

The chancellor, that's why I had heard his voice before. I'd never met him, but I have heard his voice in a video when I was first looking into the university. I also knew that the chancellor and Coach Mathews were brothers, one of the many things I had learned on my first day at this school.

I looked up at Niall to see if he, too, was surprised to hear that the chancellor was talking about us, but he was already looking down at me.

"Give me proof," Coach said to his brother. "Then I'll look into it."

It was a good thing Niall's hand was over my mouth because I probably would have laughed at how ironic it was. Two people talking about us being "infatuated", and just around the corner, there we were... our chests pressed against each other.

That was when Niall's hand moved from my mouth and his thumb trailed along my bottom lip, his eyes that reminded me of the ocean at Santa Monica beach looking into mine. His touch was gentle and I desperately wondered what was going through his head at that very moment.

My foot tapped. My fingers twitched. I could feel the urge to run bubbling up against my skin - to sprint right out of that hallway and go find some place quite. I was over heating with Niall's nearness and the two people who could end my chances at professional soccer just around the corner.

But I stayed where I was. Maybe it was because Niall's hold on me had stopped being urgent and turned into just... holding me, or because the hand on the small of my back was now rubbing up and down on my bare skin, or it could have been because-

"What's going on here?"

I quickly jumped away from Niall and spun around; looking at the boy I had left on the field only ten minutes ago. Harry had his sunglasses back on, but I knew he was looking at the two of us suspiciously.

"We were just... I was..." I stopped talking and looked over at Niall, pleading for him to help me out, just this once.

But he was looking at me with hooded eyes, like Harry wasn't standing ten feet away, like Harry didn't even exist. That was when I knew that he wasn't going to be any help with the situation.

Luckily he didn't have to because right then Coach and Chancellor Mathews appeared from around the corner and looked at the three of us. I tried my best to act nonchalant, like I had no idea what they were talking about only a few moments ago, but I had a feeling I was failing by the look Coach was giving me.

"What's going on here?" Coach asked, echoing Harry. He looked from me, to Niall, and then to Harry, before looking back to me, like I was the one who held all the answers.

"You must be Lynn Mercury," the chancellor said with a grin as he stepped forward and held a hand out for me. "It's so very nice to finally meet you. I've been to a few of your games, but never had the pleasure to talk to you."

He was wearing a well-tailored suit and nice, shiny black shoes. There wasn't a doubt that Coach and he were related. The chancellor looked like an older version of Coach with their black hair and striking green eyes.

I shook his hand, even though I would rather just disappear, and smiled pleasantly at him. "You, too, Chancellor."

"Who's this?" Coach asked, nodding his head to Harry.

The exchange Coach and the chancellor were having popped in my head and I closed the space between Harry and I, placing my arm around his slim waist. "This is Harry Styles," I told him. "My boyfriend."

I watched Coach look over at his brother and raise his brows as if to say, I told you so.

"We came here with some friends, but we were just leaving," I told them. Totally not a lie.

"Well, don't let us hold you back," Coach said with a smile.

I took Harry's hand and quickly walked away from them before something else came up, like why we were inside the building in the first place. Harry informed me that Jillian and Chloe had already left, Jillian saying that her shift at The Courtyard Bar started soon and that Chloe had to go meet up with Abby.

It wasn't until we were safely out of the building and in the parking lot did I bring up what happened.

"Are you mad?" I asked. "It's not what you think, Harry. Niall and I were-"

"I'm not mad," he interrupted.

I stared at him. "What do you mean you're not mad?"

"I mean that we're not together, really, so it's free game, I guess," he said. I noticed that he was refusing to look at me as we stepped up to his car. He handed me my shirt that I had left at the pitch and continued. "I know you only said that I was your boyfriend to get the chancellor and your coach off your back. It's okay, Lynn. Honestly."

As Harry drove me back to my dorm, I couldn't help but think about how close Niall and I had gotten to being caught. But then I had to stop myself. Caught doing what?

We weren't doing anything wrong; unless you count us eavesdropping into their conversation. Niall and I weren't dating or even sleeping together. There wasn't anything to really worry about, unless Coach found out about those few times we had kissed. But those were in the past, not to mention mistakes. They will always be mistakes.

When Harry pulled up to the Aspen House, I unbuckled and reached over to grab Harry's face. Without warning, my lips were on his.

I tried to make it count, but it wasn't like in films or books. There were no fireworks or electricity between us. The kiss was like two strangers meeting: very formal and mechanical. It took a few seconds, but eventually he started kissing me back and in a flash I was out of my seat and sitting on his lap.

I wanted to make it up to him, to tell him that Niall meant nothing to me. And he does, mean nothing to me, I mean. Sure, he might know things about me that some people don't, but that's not going to change the fact that I'm sitting in Harry's lap, and not his.

After a few minutes of the steering wheel rubbing me the wrong way on the small of my back, Harry pulled away and I frowned.

"Can I ask you something?" he requested.

"Yeah, anything."

Harry took a deep sigh and finally looked at me. "Are you in this?" he asked. "I mean, if this were to ever amount to anything, are you willing to give it a go?"

I stared at him. "What do you mean?"

"You need to decide if you want to be with me or not," he explained. His hand went up to cup my face, his thumb trailing up and down my cheek. "Your acting like you do... but your heart isn't in it, not like I am."

"That's not-"

"Lynn," Harry countered, shutting me up.

The silent car was willed with our thin breathing, and silently, I got off his lap and opened the passenger side door and got out. I didn't know what was happening, but I wasn't sure that I liked it very much. My fingers started to twitch for the second time that day, and I knew I had to get out of there - to run.

Before I could close the door, Harry looked at me again and said, "But I'll be here once you decide."