(A/N: I've been waiting for this moment the entire fic.

LEVEL NINE --
THE CAFETORIUM!!!!)

Jeremy took his tray back to the table. Thankfully, Brooke had a different lunch period Wednesdays, so Jeremy sat beside Michael at their usual spot; no matter how counterintuitive that seemed, The Squip had explained that since they'd been sitting together for years, suddenly breaking the pattern would be too suspicious. So he was told to sit next to Michael, but avoid talking to him as much as possible. "Don't worry," the Squip had said. "I'll take care of everything."

The parallel to Michael's own words was not lost on Jeremy.

The plan went fairly well, with Jeremy focusing his attention on Rich most of the lunch period. Of course, Jeremy couldn't actually focus -- his mind was on Michael the whole time. But the Squip stood behind him and told him exactly what to say to convince Rich he was listening.

Michael is looking at me. Is he about to say something?

"It doesn't matter. In a moment, say 'I completely agree' as if Rich had just pointed out that the sky is blue," the Squip instructed.

Jeremy only caught this much of Rich's story: " -- and so I said, that is not how you win an argument. The best thing to do at that point is to just give in and buy the fuckin' hamster wheel."

"I completely agree," said Jeremy, nodding solemnly.

Michael seems upset. I'm making him sad -- I can't keep doing this.

The Squip reassured him. "It's for the best, Jeremy. I promise. The next time Michael speaks, ignore him."

I can't.

"Trust me."

...I can't.

Right on cue, Michael spoke up. "I'll be right back, guys, I have to go take a break from binding. Sorry, my back is killing me."

"No problem, man," said Jeremy, waving goodbye as he watched his friend cross the cafetorium. He couldn't help but smile as Michael entered the men's room -- he remembered how hard it was to convince the principal to let Michael transition at school. Jeremy had helped him win that fight, helped him write emails to his teachers telling them to correct his name on their roster, and helped him pick out an all-new wardrobe as soon as he'd come out. Jeremy was fully supportive, although Mr. Heere was still unaware. He had to be. If Jeremy let anything slip, he'd never be allowed to --

"Ow!" Jeremy's thoughts were interrupted by a shock to the back of the head.

"You good, man?" asked Rich.

"Yeah. Funny bone," Jeremy echoed from the Squip.

"Sorry, I had no choice," the Squip sighed. "You have to pay attention to me; I was instructing you and you were oblivious. I'll repeat myself. When Michael returns, don't make eye contact. Remember, the aim is to make him crave your attention."

But I crave his attention.

"You're going to have to... how do I say this delicately... suck it up, buttercup. It'll be worth it later." He looked up. "Here he comes. Remember, no eye contact."

Jeremy obeyed this time, barely glancing up at Michael as he returned. This is torture, Jeremy whined. His eyes are too pretty to not look at. I feel like I already forgot what they look like.

"No, you haven't, you're picturing them perfectly," the Squip said dismissively. He suddenly crossed through the table to where Rich was sitting and stood behind him, then got right up in Rich's face, waved his hands around, and stuck out his tongue. Rich was completely oblivious, of course, which made Jeremy giggle. The Squip smiled. "I could have just told you to laugh, but that wouldn't have been as convincing."

Rich was laughing too, presumably at his own joke. Michael only smiled halfheartedly down at the table.

This is going to be harder than I thought. He's breaking my heart over here.

"Don't think about how you're making him feel right now." The Squip sat next to Jeremy and threw a holographic arm around his shoulders. "Think about how you'll make him feel in the future when you finally confess your love."

Jeremy sighed inwardly and imagined the moment very briefly before he was interrupted again.

"Stop blushing."

Sorry. That time it's on you, though. Jeremy collected himself for a moment, then thought, I seriously can't keep this up.

"'Shit, I just remembered, I gotta go. Mr. Reyes needed me to help staple all those scripts for the freshman one-act,'" said the Squip. "Then leave in a rush."

Jeremy gasped. "Shit, I just remembered." He stood and collected his things frantically. "I gotta go. Mr. Reyes needed me to help staple all those scripts for the freshman one-act," he repeated. Rich and Michael said their hurried goodbyes and Jeremy bolted.

The Squip directed Jeremy to the upstairs boys' bathroom, where they could talk in private. They slipped into the biggest stall as Jeremy locked the door behind them and began pacing back and forth.

"I can't do this anymore. I know I barely even started, but... I can't keep hurting him like that. Every time I see his face I feel so guilty, like -- like last time. I'm so scared he's going to get mad at me and I'm going to lose him for good." Jeremy rounded on the Squip. "I can't manipulate him like this! He's never going to fall in love with me if I keep being such a jerk to him. And if he does, it won't be me, or it won't be him, it just -- " He sighed. "It won't be the same."

Jeremy stopped, realizing how quiet the Squip had been this whole time. He usually would've interjected by now, but he just stared at the floor in concentration, silently.

"Uh... Squip?" Jeremy tried.

The Squip looked at Jeremy as if he was crazy. "Don't... address me like that, it's awkward." He composed himself. "I'm calculating. I'm re-routing, like a GPS when you make a wrong turn. Oh, and don't respond out loud."

I made a wrong turn? Jeremy thought as the stall door next to his slammed shut.

"No, I did." The Squip rubbed the bridge of his nose. "Jeremy... there's a problem with the original goal we had in place. We thought that what you wanted was Michael. But now that some unforeseen outcomes have surfaced... you've changed your mind without realizing it."

Jeremy was unsure of where he was going with this, but it made him nervous. What do I want, then?

The Squip shook his head. "You have to tell me or I can't make it happen. It's in my programming. Really think about it, Jeremy. What do you know as of now, and how do you feel about it?"

Jeremy began to pace again. I know that I love him, even though it hurts. And I know that I want to be with him, but can't, which hurts, because he's with Brooke, which hurts. I know that I have a chance, but that involves hurting him, which hurts me. Basically, I'm fucked and in pain. The reason I took you was to get him to like me, but now that that won't work, I need to figure something else out. I need... He froze, his face falling as the realization hit him. I need out.

The Squip nodded solemnly. He placed a hand on Jeremy's shoulder. "You want me to help you get over him."

Easier than getting under him, at this point.

"Do not try to make jokes," said the Squip. "You're in emotional distress, mostly because you know exactly what I am about to suggest."

Tears pricked the back of Jeremy's eyes, because of course the Squip was right. Jeremy knew what he had to do if he wanted to get over Michael and ensure his own future happiness -- happiness for both of them, really, because God knows how Michael would react if he found out Jeremy was pining over him for so long. So long. Jeremy thought back to the year before, and before that, and before that, and couldn't think of a time when he wasn't in love with Michael. Of course, he never admitted it to himself. He'd suppressed it for years. But now it was all pouring out and he couldn't stop it.

"But you can stop it," the Squip pointed out. "You know the next course of action. All you have to do is say the word, and this will all be behind you. You'll never feel this kind of pain again -- not because of Michael, anyway. I can fix this. And I know you want me to, I can see that. So, Jeremy, would you like to do the honors?"

Jeremy sighed, resolute in his decision. He assured himself that it was for the best. Not only that, it was his only option.

He looked down at the floor as the tears began to fall.

"Optic nerve blocking... on."