~Byun Baekhyun

Maniniwala ba kayo kung sinabi kong may chemical na nilagay sa kinain kong cupcake at cake? Ayun suspended ang mga estudyanteng naglagay ng chemical sa cupcake at cake. Tangina ng mga yun.

Pero this time seryoso, isang napakalaking panaginip lang ang tungkol sa mga booths na nakita ko. Grabe it felt real! Hindi ako nakapasok kahapon dahil late na rin ako nagising dahil sa punyetang panaginip na yun. Like ew, inamin ko nanaman na gusto ko nga si Park Chanyeol and I'm admitting it right now pero hanggang sa panaginip ko pa naman? Maawa naman saakin yun utak ko.

I went to the kitchen and drank some cold water. I then went to the living room to read some books but I was shocked when I saw her again.

"How's sleep? Byun Baekhyun, long time no see."

"And what are you doing here Krystal, again? Tell me, what do you want?" I hissed and she stood up quickly and roamed around me. What does she wants? Again?

"Well, I don't. I don't what anything. I'm here just to tell you the sad news."

"What about that sad news?"

"It's all about Seth." She looked at me with serious face. Well I thought it was really sad and serious.

"Tell me." I commanded and she nodded.

"Seth had died earlier." My eyes was about to pop out when I heard her said that. How sad was that! Even though he was a evil but that was just one of the kind.

"Is that why Seth had appeared at our rooftop last time." Oh yeah I remembered.

"Then you go tell me about that rooftop scene." She crossed-arms and was about to tell me another word but then I stopped her.

"I was in the scene where I did some cutting-classes because of confusion. It was actually lunch time, i guess. Still I was confused about Chanyeol and Kyungsoo's relationship and then----"

"Jealous? I guess you're jealous about the two of them."

"Oh shut up Krystal. Bitter ka lang wala ka kasing lovelife."

"Well then want to see my new boyfriend?" I hissed at her.

"Just shut up. You told me to tell you the scene not my lovelife. Tss. Witches, really."

"You go ahead." I continued my so-called story telling.

"Seth had appeared onfront of me. He told me that he was really sorry about what happened last time. He told me to tell the all of you that he was really sorry about it. And he told me that he was still inlove with Baekirina no matter what." I think she was really touched yeah?

"Touched by Seth?" I wiggled my eyebrows.

"You shut up Park."

"By the way, how's sleep?" She asked changing the topic

"And why do the heck all of you care about my sleep?" I'm just tired of answering their questions about my sleep.

"Nah, nothing." She was actually checking her long nails.

"He was actually helping you." She suddenly opened a new topic again.

"Who? Who's still helping me when I'm still confused? I don't think someone's helping me. Stop fooling around Krystal." I was about really to cry onfront of her. But I just stopped those stupid tears to fall out, but I can't, I really can't. I started sobbing again. I'm too tired of crying.

"You'll see. Seth had been helping you! He was actually trying to help you to release your feelings. That's why those dreams are always like that." Oh really. The day I got back here, I actually dreamt about me and Chanyeol. We're actually getting married and then having two kids, one with the face of him and one with the face of me. It was actually great.

"Krystal just stop. I don't want him. I can't love him the way he loves me." Yeah there was actually this one reason why. One stupid reason.

"If it's that what you want then I'll give up. I can't just push you through things you don't want. Let's just contact each other. Thanks Baekhyun, and goodbye." She suddenly disappeared.

Someone rung the doorbell. Who is it? It must be mom, she went to the market to buy some things she wanted. Well that must be really her.

I opened the door and revealed it was...

Oh yeah him.

I was about to shut him out but he stopped me.

"And why on earth are you here?" I don't want to see him.

Kapag nakikita ko sya, hindi ko mapigilan na isipin ang magiging future namin. Hindi ko mapigilang isipin ang magiging anak namin. Hindi ko mapigilang isipin na kapag ang kasal namin ay dumating na. Hindi ko mapigilang isipin na hindi sya magiging masaya saakin.

Kaya kapag nakikita ko sya, hindi ko mapigilang maluha. Hindi ko namamalayan minsan na tumutulo na pala ang mga luha ko. And most of all, I'm not aware that I'm dreaming too much. I'm dreaming too much for our future. For our future that cannot be fulfill because of me. For our future that cannot happen because it was really impossible that he'll be happy and I can't make him happy the way he is right now.

I don't want those smiles and laughters to disappear. I don't want it to be exchanged with sadness and depression. I want him to be happy the way he is right now because I love him. I'm actually letting him go.

"Baekhyun let's talk."

"Please stop. Chanyeol please stop. I don't want to."

"Baek just for a moment. I just wanted you to know how much I really love you and how much I----"

"Hindi ka pa ba napapagod saakin? Hindi tayo pwede! Ikaw yun tipo ng taong hindi kaagad sumusuko, pero ako sumusuko na. Chanyeol masasaktan ka lang. Can you please stop? Will you? I'm letting you go. I couldn't just imagine our future because of me! The stupid me! I've been calling things stupid, people stupid and you stupid but then I realized I was the stupid one. I love you and you love me. Bagay tayo sabi nila pero para saakin hindi!

I know one day you'll get tired of me. I know one day those laughters and smiles will be gone because of me. And I don't want you to lose those. I don't want you to get tired of smiling because of me. You are one of the kind that shouldn't be take for granted.

Gustong gusto ko man maging tayo pero hindi pwede. Magiging maganda ang future natin at matutupad ang mga pangarap natin pero hindi rin pwede. Gustong gusto ko man lumakad sa gitna ng mga taong mahal na mahal ko at kasama ko ang tatay ko. Ibibigay ng tatay ko ang kamay ng prinsesa nya sa taong pinakamamahal nya sa buhay at sabay haharap sa pari at lalong lalo na sa Panginoon at sasabihin ang pinakamasarap na salitang maririnig mo. Susupa tayo ng sabay sa harapan ng lahat hanggang sa kamatayan.

Kukuha tayo ng bahay at gagawin ang ginagawa ng mga mag-asawa. Magkakaroon tayo ng mga anak at sabay natin silang palalakihin ng may pagmamahal at paggalang. Sabay natin silang makikitang lumaki at magkaroon ng sarili sariling mga buhay.

Hanggang sa tumanda tayo. Hanggang sa matatanda na tayo ay wala pa ring nagiiwanan saatin. Habang matatanda na tayo ay inaalala natin ang mga pinagdaanan natin. Dadalawin tayo ng ating mga apo at anak.

At balang araw ay mawawala tayo dito sa mundo. And our love will always remain. Our love will be never forgotten. Our love will be one. Our love will be forever. We'll be loving each other till death do us apart.

Pero Chanyeol, hindi kita kayang bigyan ng anak. Hindi tayo magiging masaya dahil saakin. Hindi kita kayang bigyan ng sariling anak. And that would cause sadness and depression. Kahit na mag-ampon pa tayo ng anak pero syempre hahanapin mo pa rin ang sariling kadugo mo. Alam kong wala na akong magiging choice kundi palayain ka. Gusto kong maging masaya ka katulad ng mga lalaking nandyan.

Ayokong mawala ang matatamis mong ngiti. Gusto kong habang tumatagal ay nagiging masaya ka. At hindi ko kayang ibigay ang saya na iyon. Chanyeol, even though I love you, I'm really letting you go. You'll get tired soon." Tears are falling down non-stop. His tears are falling too. I can't bear it when he was crying because of me, it fucking hurts me too. I can almost feel his pain. Ayoko na. Pagod na akong umiyak.

"I still won't give up on you Baekhyun. Even though you will not bear any child soon, I'll be marrying you. We'll be family, let's adopt some children and watch them grow up.

Smiles, laughters, tears, and everything won't go away. Baekhyun, kung ayaw mong nakikita akong nasasaktan, kung ayaw mong makitang mawala ang mga ngiti ko, ngayon palang nagkakaganyan ka ay unting unti nang nawawala.

Naiisip mo ang future natin? At hindi mo ako napapasaya? Hindi totoo yun, ikaw lang ang nagpadama saakin ng tunay na pagmamahal. I won't get tired of you, never and ever.

I love you Byun Baekhyun. Please don't do this. I love you. I love you. I really love you."

And soon, I already felt his lips onto mine. His sweet lips that I really missed.