|7|
Naija people and their food...

This one ooooh, do I even have to say anything, just look at these foods:

Egusi Soup:

Jollof Rice:

Okra Soup:

Ogbono Soup

Suya:

These pictures are sweetining me well well oooooh. Chi! Anyway, these are of course not all of Nigerian foods, but these are the ones most common. 

|8|

Naija People and Church...

Heyyyyyyy! Church is a must! Especially if you are a Nigerian.  No if, ands or buts about it... anyway let me just show you an example.

For example:

Mom: CHUKWUEMEKA ARE YOU STILL SLEEPING! GET UP, WE NEED TO GO TO CHURCH.

*no response*

Mom: CHUKWUEMEKA!

*goes upstairs to see Chukwuemeka sleeping*

Mom: My friend get up! Get up!

Chukwuemeka: Mooooom!

Mom: DON'T MOOOOM ME! AM I YOUR AGEMATE! IDIOTIC SON! GETUP OR I WILL GET YOU UP WITH SOME HARD SLAPS, WE NEED TO GET TO CHURCH. MOOOOOOM YOUR HEAD, IDIOT!

Wow. Naija People ooooh! Abi a lie?

|9|

Greeting your elders...

This one...this one I no dey have problems, as a Nigerian this one is almost second language. You must have respect to your elders, as shown in this example.

For example:

Grandpa: Hello my son, how are you?

Chukwu: Hi.

Grandpa: WHICH KIND HI BE THAT?

Chukwu: What?

Grandpa: HEY! YOU PEOPLE HAVE CORRUPTED HIM! YOU HAVE FINISHED ME! SEE YOUR LIFE! IN FACT, AMERICA HAS SPOILED YOU ABI?

Dad: Ehhh, please don't be mad, let me just go talk to him for a moment ehh, don't worry he must have hit his head very very hard but I will fix it for him.

Grandpa: Chi! Okooooo! Talk to him ooooo! Talk to him!

*pulls Chukwu into kitchen*

Dad: YOU MUST BE VERY MAD! YES! YOU ARE MAD!

*Mom comes into kitchen and gives Chukwu two hard slaps on his head*

Mom: YOU DE CRAZE?! EHHHH?! DE CRAZE?! YOU BETA GO OUT THERE AND KNEEL BEFORE HIM SAY 'SA', 'SORRY ABOUT THAT SA'! DO YOU HEAR ME?!

*Chukwu sniffles*

Chukwu: Ok.

Mom: IDIOT! COMON GET OUT MY SIGHT!

*comes out of kitchen*

Dad: Sorry oooh!

Grandpa: No problem, no problem.

*Chukwu kneels*

Chukwu: Sir, I'm sorry sir.

Grandpa: GET THAT FROWN OFF YOUR FACE! YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING ME, YOU ARE DOING YOURSELF OOOOOOO! YOU ARE DOING YOURSELF!

|10|

Home Management...

This one na taken serious, serious! You no de play with this one oooooh! From one to another, sweeping the floor to washing the plates!

For example: 

Emeka: *sweeps the floor*

Dad: EMEKA!

Emeka: Yes sa?

Dad: MOP THE FLOOR!

Emeka: Ok sa!

*5 minutes later*

Dad: EMEKA!

Emeka: Yes sa!

Dad: GO LOAD THE WASHER!

Emeka: Ok sa!

*5 minutes later*

Dad: EMEKA!

Emeka: *sighs* Yes sa!

Dad: WHAT ARE YOU DOING SITTING THERE! COMON VACUUM THE HOUSE NA!

Emeka: Yes sa!

I feel so sorry for this boy Chi! Me am go do am...I might not do am well well but I still go do am ooo!

|11|

Clothes...

This one na differ for each household ooo but for me...CHI! These people whala eh! The type of whala these people be given me is too much ooo!

For example:

Ihechi: *Hmmm maybe I should wear a crop top with some high waist jeans*

*puts it on*

*has 5 minutes left before driving to bus stop*

Mom: OH MY JEHOVAH NESSEI!

Dad: Who is that saying GOD's name in vain?

Mom: CHIMO! MY HUSBAND COME SEE!

Dad: Wait ooo, I'm coming.

*he arrives*

Mom: Look at your daughter! No look at her well well! 

Dad: "JE-JEHOVAH ooooh why now! Look my wife, this one no be my duaghter ooo!

Mom: *leaves the room*

*she comes back*

Ihechi: MOM!

Dad: Mom what! I said MOM WHAT! My friend if you even move I will disown you there nonsense!

*leaves the room*

Mom: *Cuts the top off*

Mom: Eheee! You want to go naked go naked! But not in my house!

This one I no dey do am ooo! Crop top no be say chop chop! I no de look for whala in de morning, in fact I never de look for whala...whala de come looking for me! Abi a lie?

|12|

The best advice you will ever get life from your Nigerian Parents 

This one I no be say that the advice be the one and only one and true best advice. Noooo oh! I be say that it is rare they no de give you advice without some life lesson behind that one.

For example:

Dad: Son we will miss you very very much.

Mom: Yes ooo!

Dad: In fact who will we shout out when I need someone to get the remote for me?

Mom: Chi!

Dad: In fact who will be there when I need to shout at someone?

Mom: Chi! Not me oooh!

Dad: Ehee who will scrub the floors like you do, fail in life like you do and more.

Mom: No one ooh! Except my son.

Dad: Now Chibuzo, I want you to go to college and succeed! Succeed like the man you are!

Mom: AMEN!

Dad: Now I have one last thing I want to say to you.

Chibuzo: And what is that?

Dad & Mom: DON'T BE STUPID!

Can I get a hallelujah? AMEN. No be say this advice be said unto us hundred times, in fact you cannot even be stupid because your parents will ship you back to Nigeria so you can be stupid there

Before I go...

Just decided to share these memes with you guys, I'm sure as a Nigerian we have heard this all before, abi a lie?

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To be continued...