My back was pressing so hard into the doorframe that it hurt. My first instance was to turn and run, but where could I run to? He was standing between me and the door. My voice came out shaky, “Are you here to kill me?”

                Loki spread his hands reassuringly, as if to prove he held no weapon, “I’m not here to hurt you, I promise. Will you just hear me out?”

                “Do I have a choice?” I wrapped my arms over my chest, feeling horribly exposed. Loki looked embarrassed. “Why don’t you go put a bath robe on, then I’ll explain.”

                That was probably a good idea. I backed into the bathroom, keeping an eye on him the entire time, yanking one of the thick cotton robes from the back of the door. I shrugged into it, tying it on over the towel. That was better. Now that I wasn’t standing in front of him half naked I felt a little braver. If he tried something I’d kick the crap out of him. At least Lief’s torturous hand to hand combat lessons were good for something. I folded my arms and arched a brow at him critically,

                “Explain. You had better do a damn good job of it too. I read your text messages.”

                “I know,” Loki ran one hand through his curly hair, soft brown eyes searching my face. He seemed hesitant, “I’m sorry. I should have told you. “

                “Should have told me what? That you were supposed to kill me?”

                “No, that I had decided that I couldn’t the moment I met you.”

                I narrowed my eyes at him in alarm, “So you were meant to kill me!”

                Loki rubbed his forehead, “technically, yes. We were aware of the Queen’s little experiment with her husband and the genetic memories. Surtr decided that if they didn’t have you to rally behind, they might not try to annihilate us again.” He shook his head, “But when I got into the back of that van and saw you, I just couldn’t do it.” He laughed abruptly, a sound devoid of humor, “I’ve killed in battle before, but…when it came down to it, there’s no way I could just slaughter someone who was completely helpless.”

                Anger and confusion were battling for dominance within me, “Well, doesn’t that just make you a saint,” I glared at him, “so where exactly where you taking me then? Were you really going to  take me to California and help me escape?”

                “That was the original plan, but obviously that the Queen pretty much thinks of you as her daughter now, there’s no way she’d ever give up the search. That’s not an option anymore.”

                 I said incredulously, “There are no options! I’m staying right here. I don’t trust you at all.”

                “I know,” Loki’s face was earnest, “I don’t blame you. But you can’t stay here.”

                My voice came out in a growl, “What are you talking about…”

                Loki took a step closer, and again I backed up, bumping my shoulder on the doorframe. His voice was low and urgent, “Queen Eira is a nutcase, Megan.”

                It had been so long since anyone other than Charlotte had called me Megan. It made my stomach drop to realize I’d started to think of myself as Amora. Was I forgetting my real identity? Would the part of me that was Megan keep disappearing a bit at a time until it was completely gone? I wasn’t sure I wanted to be Amora. And I certainly wasn’t ready to lead anyone into battle.

 Loki continue, “The Queen cannot be allowed to do what she’s planning. She wants to go to war.” He said earnestly, “But my people won’t last in a war. There aren’t enough of us. We suffered terribly over the years because of her. She wants to destroy an entire race because of some out dated prophecy. She wants to destroy my home...” there was pleading in his voice, “and she wants to use you to do it. This will be the second time she’s tried to massacre my people. The woman you are named for knew it was wrong too, she ended up disobeying orders because of it.”

                “What?” I took a step forward, curiosity driving the fear away, “What do you mean? What happened? Tell me everything you know about her.”

                Loki smiled, but his eyes were hard, “the battle was long and bloody. Amora led them, killing many of our leaders. When it was over, there were hardly any of us left. Soldiers that lay down their arms on the battle field when it was over were not spared, not even for slaves. The tale is that Amora breached the city walls, killing the guards there. They took the city and all that was in it, our woman and children. She was supposed to leave no one alive, but she refused. The soldiers burned the city that day, but before they did so, she gave orders to allow the survivors to escape.”

                I stared at him, struggling to believe what he was telling me was true. Why would he lie? But why hadn’t Erik told me this story? Why had nobody even mentioned it? My voice was low and breathless, “What about you? Did you fight? How did you survive?”

                Loki looked grim, “I almost didn’t. The frost jotun were foolish and over confident in battle. They didn’t check the dead to make sure they were really dead. There was enough blood on me to make it look like I was fatally wounded, so, like many of the other soldiers, I pretended. My father did the same thing. King Surtr.”

                My mouth dropped open, “Your father is the king?”

                He shrugged, grinning at me, “that’s why I can get away with some much stuff. That’s why I can disobey him in regards to you.” He clasped his hands together in a pleading gesture, “come back with me, come with me to the city of Muspellheim. I’ll talk to my father. You can take refuge there. You can’t stay here, it isn’t safe.”

                “Are you kidding?” I hissed, “your father gave you orders to kill me. I’m not going back there just hoping you're charming enough to talk him into sparing my life. Forget it!”

                “He’s not stupid,” Loki argued, “he knows having you on our side would be a big asset. It would be huge! Once he gets to know you he’ll love you just as much…” he stopped abruptly, and said hastily, “he’ll like you a lot.”

                What had he been about to say? I stared at him curiously, and he gave me a pleading look. I’ll grant him one thing, it was hard to say no to the huge brown puppy dog eyes. But there was no way I was going to be talked into what could turn out to be suicide, “No way,” I folded my arms over my chest and planted my feet firmly, just to let him know I couldn’t be swayed on this, “I’m staying right here. At least I know the Queen doesn’t want me dead.”

                Lief’s obnoxious voice popped up in my mind, on cue, telling me that once her “fascination” with me faded I’d cross the line and be executed. Was I really safe here? Perhaps Loki was right and she was crazy. But there was no saying that this Surtr would be any better. So what the hell was I supposed to do? The urge to flee seized me suddenly, just as strong as it had been the day I’d read the text messages on Loki’s phone. I wanted to turn and run for it, burst out of the bedroom doors and run down the corridors. Escape this ice palace and strike out on my own again. Only where would I go that no one could find me? And when I got out of the castle would I even be in Grande Prairie? No, I’d be in some weird otherworldly dimension. Who knew what else besides frost giants lurked out on that alien plain.

                Loki had stepped closer without me noticing, and now he gently took my hand. My body went ridged and he pulled away quickly. His eyes were sad, “I swear to you, Megan. I don’t want to hurt you. I’m not going to force you to come with me, but I also can’t leave you here at the mercy of these people. They’re evil. They massacred us. Do you know how long it took to rebuild our kingdom? To repopulate with only a handfull of men? They did this to us, and I feel like it’s my fault you’re here, like I chased you into their arms.” He turned from me, looking into the fire. His voice was anxious, “I know you don’t trust me. No one could blame you.” He turned back abruptly, eyes alight, “Why don’t we just get away from here? Go anywhere. We don’t have to go back to my home. We can hide out on our own.”

                Instantly the memories of the hotel came flooding back. Of lying in bed with Loki, on separate ends, body tense with nerves and excitement. Our fingers brushing and the thrill it had sent through me. The text messages I read later….

                My voice was nothing but a shaky whisper, “I can’t.”

                Loki’s head dropped, and he looked at his feet, “You think I’m lying.”

                “I don’t know what to believe,” my voice cracked, and frustration filled every part of me, “they’re telling me you’re the enemy, you’re telling me you were supposed to kill me but now you’re not. You’re telling me the Queen is evil. What the hell am I supposed to believe?”

                Loki looked right at me, the full force of his brown eyes made my breath catch in my throat, “I won’t leave without you. I’m going to prove to you that I mean what I say,” he reached out and caught my hand again, and this time he didn’t pull back, “I won’t let anything happen to you.”

                Heat flooded my face. My heart, which had settled back into a regular rhythm since the shock of seeing him, began thumping hard again. “You can’t stay here,” I whispered, “what if they catch you?”

                He gave me an easy grin, “They won’t catch me. I’m a master of disguise. You have no idea how easy it was to get into this place. They're so over confident that nobody would dare challange them,” He released my hand and bent to pick up the wig and glasses he’d chucked on the floor. “No one ever looks twice at the servants, and they’re so down trodden they hardly notice what’s going on around them,” he frowned, “that’s why this kingdom is so rotten, that’s what it does to people.”

                “You don’t’ have servants at…Mus-whatever?” I said curiously.

                “We do, but they’re paid. That’s the difference. We keep them well fed and happy and give them wages. The servants here are little more than slaves.” The disapproval was evident in Loki’s voice.

                “I don’t understand you,” I stared up at him, studying his face. It was open and friendly, not the face of a killer, “why did you take the job…to…to kill me?”

                “I wanted to meet the person who was most like Amora,” Loki’s voice was quiet, “I never got to meet her, but I think she was a hero.” He sighed, “my father was a fool to send me. He knows I just do whatever I want. I asked for the assignment. That way I would know if you were really like her, or you were some evil knock off.”

                An evil twin. I snorted, “so, if you had judged me to be evil you would have killed me?”

                “Naw,” he shrugged, “I still don’t think I’d have the guts to flat out kill a girl in cold blood. I probably would have just stranded you somewhere and reported back that I’d done it.”

                Was he really telling the truth now? Or just back peddling, denying that he’d ever planned to kill me? I sighed, wishing I could just make him take some kind of lie detector test.

                Loki shoved the wig back on his head carelessly. It listed to the left, making him look ridiculous, and I couldn’t help smiling. “You might want to fix that.”

                Instead he stuck the glasses on and gave me a huge dorky grin, and I couldn’t stop myself from laughing. He straightened the blonde wig and cleared his throat, dropping his eyes to the ground. Loki hunched his shoulders and said meekly, “Will that be all miss?”

                The transformation was startling, “You do look like a servant,” I nodded, “that’s a bit eerie actually.”

                “It’s all about posture and mannerism,” Loki straightened up and grinned, “anyone could pull it off really. You just study how the servants hold themselves and you imitate it. No one looks at you twice as long as you’re not under foot and you’re working away at one menial task or another. I don’t think anyone thinks a fire jotun would be stupid enough to try to sneak in. So that works to my advantage.”

                The smile slipped off my face, “Loki, what if you get caught, you’ll get in a huge trouble. The Queen will…”

                “Don’t worry about me,” his smile was softer this time. He looked pleased about something, “I’ll be fine. Think on what I said to you. We don’t even have to go to my city, we can go anywhere you want.” He held up his hands when I opened my mouth to protest, “just think on it. I’ll be here. I’ll come to your room each night.”

                The thought of that made my stomach flutter, but then I remembered Charlotte, “You can’t! I have a roommate. My friend, Charlotte.”

                Loki looked surprised, then he nodded thoughtfully, “if she’s your close friend then she’ll have to come with us.”

                I shot him a warning look, and he said, “if you decide to come with me. Can Charlotte keep a secret?”

                “I think so,” I hesitated. That had never been put to the test, but I couldn’t see Charlotte giving away a life or death secret for the sake of gossip. “Yeah, I’m pretty sure she’d be fine.”

                “Tell her then,” Loki said, “if you trust her, then I trust her. I’ll be back tomorrow night. I’ll bring in a tray of food so it looks like you’ve requested me to bring you something.” 

                The flutters in my stomach grew stronger as he stepped closer, touching my arm. “I’ll see you tomorrow night. ”

                Then he turned and strode for the door, leaning back to give me a quick and cheeky wink before he shut it behind him, “sweet dreams, Megan.”

                My knees were shaky as I wobbled over to the bed and sat down, trying to sort out everything that was going on in my head right now. Who exactly was I supposed to trust? Loki seemed like he was telling the truth, he seemed open and honest and charming, but it could easily be a façade. He could be tricking me. I could leave with him and then find out it had all been an elaborate lie. But if he had been sent to kill me he wasn’t doing a very good job of it! He had already snuck into the palace and into my room. He could have assassinated me right then and there, but he hadn’t. What would have been the point in gaining my trust if the only goal was to kill me? He could just have easily done it here and then snuck out. And what about his story about Amora? Why had nobody here told me that?

                I groaned and rubbed my temples. Thinking about this made me feel like my brain was on overload. I was sore and exhausted and confused. Sleep would probably be the best course of action right now. Tomorrow I would think about who I should trust and who was lying. I flopped back onto the bed and suddenly remembered what my “assignment” for tonight was supposed to be. Accept that I was jotun. Accept that I had the power to freeze and open myself up to it. If I was going to make a decision about who to trust, and I ended up making the wrong decision somehow, I would need all the power I could get.

                I held my hands in front of my face and looked closely at them. They weren’t anything special to look at. Short stubby fingernails, long slim fingers….normal hands. Hands that held power in them. Stretching my left hand out I grabbed the bedpost, shutting my eyes, trying to find this mental block. What was keeping me from releasing the power? What was stopping me?

                Searching inwards was harder than I thought it would be. My emotions were a turmoil of different things, and I tried to calm myself. Breathing deep and evenly and relaxing all the muscles in my body, concentrating on the feeling of the wood under my fingers. There was nothing to be afraid of.

I’m not Amora. I am Megan. I am myself, and I am jotun and I can accept that part of me. I am Megan….

                My fingers slid on the wood, and I opened my eyes. My heart leapt. There beneath my fingers was a delicate layer of frost, a thin pattern of ice. It was hardly more than a mist, but it was there. I had done it! For the moment all my confusion and frustration was gone, and I was fiercely happy. Proud of myself even. I stared at my hand in wonder. I had done it without being thrown into a life or death situation. I had controlled it. I recognized the feeling of the power now, in the back of my mind somewhere. It was like a release when I let it go. It was easy to hold back, but I sensed that I could open the floodgates whenever I chose to. I could access that power when I needed it.

                I would have to play around with it more, since I had a feeling it wouldn’t be easy to open myself up to it a bit at a time for the first little while. I suspected a good many objects would have to suffer being frozen solid before I learned to let the power trickle through me a bit at a time. But it was a start.

                The door creaked open, and I sat up, heart in my throat. Thinking for a moment that Loki had come back. Charlotte came through the doorway, talking to someone, laughing happily,

                “That was so funny, okay goodnight! I’ll see you tomorrow at lunch!”

                I gave her a big smile as she came in, “How did your night time walk go?”

                “It was amazing,” she gasped, “so good! I think I met someone,” her eyes were shining, she was obviously over the moon. It must have been contagious, because I felt myself smiling from ear to ear at her excitement, “You think you met someone?” I laughed, patting the bed beside me, “come give me details.”

                She bounced over, her cheeks coloring prettily, “Well, I think he might be interested, I’m not sure. He’s one of a us, a half blood. He has the sweetest smile and amazing blue-green eyes. His name is Davin. He walked me to my room!”

                I grinned, “Oooh! Sure fire romance is in your future!”

                She laughed and batted my arm, “I hope you’re right. He’s so adorable! So what did you get up to?” she pointed to my robe, “looks like you had a nice bath.”

                “You have no idea,” I took a deep breath and prepared to tell her about Loki, “I’m glad you’re sitting down, because I have something to tell you.”