s i x t e e n
"Fuck all of it."

AFTER WHAT FELT LIKE A LONG AND GRUELING WALK to the dramatic Harlai, the trio finally made it to the clearing where the depot was supposed to be hiding. She could hear the other two behind her speaking, arguing the way they always did.

"Pretty sure you can't avoid Jaha forever." Clarke pointed out with her reliable wit. It was true- After what had happened before the drop ship was released, Bellamy was bound to face the music.

"I can try." Bellamy mumbled as Harlai turned on her heel, her eyes meeting his. Every time this happened, the young woman couldn't help but feel the butterflies arising in her empty stomach. His eyes twinkled back at her showing that he, too, was thinking about their moment.

As the other two finally caught up to her, they looked at what lay before them. The rain had taken over a fraction of the land that seemed to have worn down from age and perhaps the forsaken bombs.

"The depot is supposed to be around here... somewhere." Clarke spoke as her clear blue eyes surveyed the clearing.

"There's got to be a door." Bellamy pointed out.

Clarke then turned to look at their friend as she spoke again. "Maybe he'll be lenient."

Bellamy's darkened eyes met her as his lips parted to speak, but Harlai intervened. "Yeah, come clean and it will sort itself out."

As she continued Clarke's last statement, the women shared a brief look. The good I'm their hearts wanted everything to be alright once everyone came down. It would be a miracle if they could all come together to get Earth the way it was before- maybe even better.

For a split second, anyone would be able to tell that Bellamy appreciated what the two had said as it showed in his eyes. Shaking that expression away, his voice picked up as he spoke again. He knew the were just trying to make him feel better about the situation. "Look, I shot a man. He's not gonna just forgive and forget." His eyes met Harlai's as he talked. "Let's just split up, cover more ground. Stay within shouting distance."

With that, the two girls watched as Bellamy stalked away. "Leave it to him to be such a damned realist." Harlai mumbled before walking down the slope.

She clasped her now calloused hands around her backpack's straps as she began to search for a door to the depot. The young woman's mind raced as she couldn't help but think about Bellamy's situation. Just as she thought everything was coming along for them this arose.

"Bellamy, Harlai!" Clarke called out, making the two look at her. "Over here. I found a door!"

As Bellamy started to walk over to the blonde, Harlai shouted "You two go ahead! I'm gonna keep searching out here. Just in case."

Bellamy and Clarke began to try and get into what they hoped to be the depot. Harlai knew that she should be in there with them, but she had to give herself some space from him to be able to think properly. It was like whenever she was with him she couldn't do that.

After a few more moments of searching, Harlai answered to her stomach by finding a piece of stone rubble to sit down on. Hearing it growl in annoyance, she chuckled quietly and shrugged her backpack off. "Chill, I'm gonna feed you. Don't worry." She placed it on the ground in front of her and unzipped the top, pulling out a bag of the nuts Jasper had given her before she left for their short trip.

Harlai began to pop a few at a time into her mouth, crunching on them as she looked around. It was strangely silent other than the faint sound of Clarke and Bellamy rummaging around. After a while, the nuts that she was eating began to taste a little funny. She glanced down at them in the bag when she heard a voice.

"My little flightless bird."

Glancing up, Harlai choked a little on the peanut in her mouth at what she saw. "M-Mom?"

Standing before her was her mother. Someone she thought she wouldn't ever get to see again, but something was off about her. Her usually glowing skin was pale and a little ghoulish. Her amber eyes were dark and shadowed with hate.

"The biggest mistake of my life." Her mother said with a dark chuckle as she took a step closer. "If I hadn't had you, maybe your father wouldn't have run off with someone else."

"No... you're wrong." Harlai stood to her feet feeling a little woozy, her eyes beginning to fill with tears. This wasn't her mother so she tried not to listen as she squeezed her eyes shut, tears trailing down her cheeks.

"I'm speaking the truth, Harlai." Her mother spit as she placed a cold hand on her daughter's cheek, her nails digging slightly into the skin and making Harlai stare into those dead eyes of hers.

"You made your mother so tired that I grew bored." Her father spoke as he stepped up beside his spouse. "I had to start a new life with people I actually loved." He then wrapped his hand around her throat and it began to tighten.

"Dad, stop! Please!" Harlai whimpered and gasped for air. Her feet kicked once he lifted her up, dark spots beginning to pop up into her vision.

"Maybe if we took care of our little problem we would be together at last." Elise growled as she pulled her hand away, reaching down to pick a stone up off the ground.

Squeezing her eyes shut, Harlai felt the rock hit her head and she fell to the ground. The familiar warmth of her own blood washed over her face as she heard a voice, but it wasn't that of her parents'. "My, my we got a tough one one our hands."

Her eyes fluttered open, blinking away the blood and tears. It was as if that concussion actually knocked some sense into her when she recognized the person. "Dax?" She glanced around to see that her parents had vanished and it was just her, Dax, and a gun in his hands. "Put it down."

"You should've gone down with them, Harlai." He said as he cocked the gun, pointing it at her chest. "I tried not to kill you, but here you are and Shumway said no witnesses."

A crazed Bellamy ran up with his hands held up as if he had a gun in them and he blinked away the mendacious charade. "Harlai." He breathed out as he glanced from her to Dax and the gun in his hands.

Dax pointed the weapon at Bellamy. "Ah, the main man in question."

"Bellamy, what is he talking about?" Harlai pressed a hand to the gash on her forehead, beginning to feel lightheaded as her blood ran free. "He said something about Shumway, the guard."

"He set it up." Bellamy gasped out as he held eye contact with Dax. "He gave me the gun to shoot the Chancellor." He answered as he looked at something behind Dax.

And now Shumway had sent Dax to take care of his fore-said witnesses. If there was any chance of them living in liberty on Earth, Shumway was trying to get rid of anything that would get in his way. Harlai had noticed that Bellamy was looking at something else and followed his gaze out of the corner of her eye. A bit away from them stood Clarke with a gun pointed at Dax. Shaking her head, Harlai focused on him. Maybe they could talk him out of it considering they were all here to be forgiven anyhow. Pointing his gun at Harlai, Dax spoke again. "Walk away now and I won't kill you."

"Put. It. Down." Harlai's voice had hardened as she narrowed her eyes at him. "We can forget about all of this. We won't tell anyone if you just put it down. Forgive and forget, right?" As she spoke the last part, she shared a look with Bellamy.

"We all know that won't happen. Your choice." Dax said as he placed a finger on the trigger. Harlai's eyes widened as a click was heard, Clarke trying to fire her weapon.

Dax glanced at Clarke behind him with a grimace before turning back towards Harlai. She ducked behind a tree, just barely dodging a bullet when Bellamy charged at him. "No!"

The man pushed the other to the ground, knocking the weapon out of his hands. They began to tussle around as Clarke tried to work her gun. Blinking away the dark spots, Harlai reached for the bow on her back with shaking hands. A worried look crossed her face as Dax pressed the gun to Bellamy's neck then slammed it against his head.

"Get the hell off him!" Clarke shouted as she went to help, but Dax elbowed her in the stomach, knocking her to the ground. Harlai needed to act and she needed to do it fast or he was going to kill all three of them. Steadying her hands and taking a deep breath, Harlai pulled an arrow out slipping it across the string. In one second, she aimed it at his chest and let the arrow fly into its target. With a grunt, Dax fell onto his back off of Bellamy and breathed his final breath.

Clarke settled against a stump gasping for the wind that was knocked out of her and the dark-haired man crawled beside her to do the same.

"You're okay." Clarke breathed out as Harlai placed her foot on Dax's chest. She used her hand to yank out her arrow, freeing it from the dead man's body. Feeling their eyes on her, she glanced back at them. "We're all okay."

"No, I'm not." Bellamy rasped out once Harlai plopped down on the other side of him to catch her breath. "My mother... If she knew what I've done, who I am- She raised me to do better, to be good..."

"Bellamy..." Harlai whispered as she slipped a hand over his shoulder to which he shrugged away.

"-and all I do is hurt people." He sniffed as he bowed his head down, unwilling to look either of them in the eye and shaking his head. "I'm a monster."

"Hey..." Harlai murmured as she turned towards him. All this talk was starting to get to her as tears began to build up in her eyes again. "You saved my life today- both of our lives. You may like like the beast half of the time, but I need you."

"We all need you." Clarke agreed with a softness in her tone. "None of us would have survived this place of it wasn't for you. You want forgiveness, fine, I'll give it to you. You're forgiven, okay? But you can't run, Bellamy."

A look of confusion appeared on Harlai's face before she realized what Clarke was saying. That's why Bellamy had packed up  earlier that day. He was going to leave her? Leave octavia? After everything they've been through. That one hurt.

"You have to come back with us." Clarke pleaded desperately as she looked Bellamy in the eyes. "You have to face it."

"She's right, Bellamy."

"Like you faced your mom?" Bellamy asked, obviously trying to avoid the topic at hand. "And like you faced your dad?" He asked Harlai.

The woman blinked and for just a moment she was able to see her faux parents again. He was partially right. She wasn't able to talk to her father when the time came.

"You're right." Clarke finally gasped out as she shook her head and Harlai stayed silent. "I don't want to face my mom. I... don't want to face any of it. All I think about every day is how we're gonna keep everyone alive, but we don't have a choice."

Bellamy sniffled again as Harlai stood up, shoving her bloodied arrow into the bag on her back. "Fuck this." She grumbled. She knew Clarke was only trying to help, but Harlai wasn't going to listen to any more of it. "Fuck all of it."

Turning and walking towards the way they came, Harlai began to disappear by herself into the dark woods. Clarke stood up to go after her, but Bellamy grabbed her arm with a forlorn look. "Let her go."

Tears mixed with the blood that stained her face as Harlai brushed past trees. The night's wind blew her dark, almost black locks as she rushed back home. What was wrong with her? Her own parents didn't want her and now she knew Bellamy didn't either. Maybe she was cursed. Maybe it was fate that everyone who she thought loved her only turned away and left once it got good. Whatever it was needed to fuck off.

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WORDS: 2153
CHARACTERS: 11466

After a long and not-so-needed wait, here it is! Sorry about that. It's been a rough time for a while and what better to fix it than to write? Enjoy x