I need the Dallas Stars and Tampa Bay Lightning to stop feeling sorry for themselves and wake up! You both are not in the playoffs yet. Stars, you clinched, yes. Beautiful. Now, there is a little thing called Home Ice Advantage, so...um, work on that...

My main argument and talk is geared at the "I-think-I'm-already-in-the-playoffs" Bolts squad. News Flash Lightning, YOU'RE NOT! Stop playing like a comfortable team and wake up. It's time to start scoring and being a threat. Can you do that without Stammer? Absolutely! It starts with three names: Ondrej Palat, Tyler Johnson and Nikita Kucherov. The Triplets. It's time to lead the Bolts to greatness, show the NHL that the Lightning are tough and able to make it! Sure we got a bum named "Carle" but, hey, who doesn't have a Matt Carle?! It's time for guys to step up and be leaders and score! Yes, Vladdy, that means you darling. And for God's sake, Cooper please don't be an idiot. Play "Little Hossa," bench Condra and Blundy. You need to start with a better defense. So, take this lineup to the end:

Defense: 7

Hedman, Garrison, Sustr, Coburn, Nesty, Koekkoek and yes, Carle.

Offense: 11

Triplet Line

Vladdy-Marchy-Killer (until Drouin's good to go)

Paqy-Filps-Cally

JT and Boyle

Bench: Condra and Blunden

And for the sake of sane Bolts fans, do NOT mess with the lines AT ALL. The key is to build chemistry, not ruin it.

Now, let's get out there against those Rangers and WIN IT FOR STAMMER AND STRALSY!!!!

And, Stars, WIN IT FOR TYLER!!!!