I saw you for the first time since returning to the wretched place and my heart beat faster yet slower in a nanosecond of our eyes connecting. Then you looked away and I knew... I knew I had lost you.

Without my knowledge, memories started to surface.

I thought about the first time we met, the first conversation we had, the first time you said you liked me, the first simple, innocent touch we shared. Our first kiss and so much more and my heart started to ache.

But before I allowed myself to become lost in the past, I carried an with the day, trying hard not to let the hurt in. Trying hard not to let the world or even you see how heartbroken I was. Promising myself not to let a single tear slide down my face.

Hopefully I'll survive this, survive you, survive us and the turmoil of a disaster that was left in your wake.