Ashtray sat on the edge of Sawyers bed. He stayed silent, processing all this information.

She sat with her knees to her chest leaning against the wall, "Please just be calm."

"It's a no brainer. Brianna was the one that told Nate you have the tape. She was at that sleepover and she has a motive against you." He started, "In the nicest way possible you're a fuckin idiot. Why would you get yourself involved in my mess."

"I-I wasn't going to let you go down over a mistake. And mouse was a bad guy." Sawyer nervously looked at Ashtray through her mirror reflection.

"You're fucking with shit that you have no business being apart of. You don't understand this isn't some little highschool shit that will disappear over time, this is shit that can send you to jail if you get caught Lee." He pressed his lips together.

"It's worth it. What do I have to lose anyways." She shrugged.

"Everything." He turned his head to look at her.

"It's worth it to me. I really don't believe this will end bad. And for once I need you to trust me and stop underestimating me."

Ashtray paused, "Okay." He dropped his head down and brought his hands to his forehead.

"We're in this together now. Like it or not we're stuck." Sawyer lightly laughed.

"I guess so." Ashtray gave a tight lipped smile. He wanted to trust her. He wanted to be positive. But he was so use to everything going wrong and him and his brother having to make it up. But this was way different and way more serious.

"Want some ice cream?" Sawyer suddenly asked.

Ashtray scrunched his eyebrows together. He was stressed about everything, but that was the last thing he wanted Sawyer to worry about.

"Yeah." He brought his gaze up to Sawyer.

She got off of her bed and walked towards the kitchen. Ashtray followed behind her.

They past by Gias bedroom. The door was open. Ashtray quickly glanced inside and Gia was spooning Rue who was making noises as if she was in pain. She was shaking, scrunched in a ball.

He looked away and noticed Leslie in Rues bedroom picking stuff off the floor.

"Hey honey." Leslie greeted. She gave him a warm motherly smile, "How are you?"

"I-I'm good, I'm good. How's everything around here?" His eyes wandered around Rues bedroom. Stuff was everywhere.

"Thats good to hear, sweetie. It's getting better over here. Time and patience." Leslie let out a breath. She tried to remain positive for everyone else's sake but she was crumbling inside.

Sawyer walked back over to Ashtray with two bowl in her hands, "here." She handed one to him.

"You two don't be too loud okay. I want Rue as peaceful as possible, please." Leslie was speaking mainly to sawyer.

She knew her mother was hurting. Especially since she didn't care that Ashtray was here during such a vulnerable time. She usually would've never let that happen. But she was tired. She didn't want to fight or have any of her daughters upset with her anymore.

"Okay." Sawyer chewed on her bottom lip.

Ashtray walked into Sawyer room and she came in right after, closing the door behind them.

"Sorry about all this, I know it must be weird to see my house so... Broken." Sawyer sat on the floor in front of her bed.

"It's okay Lee, I know it's a tough time you never have to be sorry about that." He sat beside her, "Do you wanna talk about it?"

For the first time in a long time she did want to talk about it. It was tough for her to actually open up but she knew out of anyone in her life Ashtray would be the one she could actually talk to.

"I uhm, I'm just really really fucking sad. And scared, and I-I just keep acting out of emotions and saying stuff that I don't mean and I just really miss my dad. So much." Her eyes began to water.

Ashtray watched her carefully. He didn't want to speak just yet. He wanted her to let it all out and actually hear her and not just give input without actually putting himself in her shoes and feeling how she's feeling.

"I know my sister misses him too and everything's so hard for her to cope. But she has so much love and support that it hurts so bad that she chooses a pill over genuine love. I-I've never taken one so I can't speak on how they make you feel but I just know they could never over power real love, right?" Sawyer was unable to look at Ashtray. She didn't wanna see his reactions, "and I just feel so sick for being such a forgiving person and always feeling like I'm the cause for everything bad that happens around me. Like a cannon event."

"You're not a cannon event Sawyer." Ashtray finally spoke up, "You're a human. A teenager. This is your first time living just like the rest of us. Yes you make mistakes or irrational decisions but you have pure intentions. You have one of the purest hearts Sawyer. I've never met anyone as pure as you."

"Are you just telling me what I want to hear or do you really mean that?" She finally looked up at him.

"I mean that sawyer. I really do." He wiped a tear from her cheek, "I know your sister is fucked up, but this time I really think she's hit rock bottom. You can't help her but don't forget that you have your other sister and mom who are also affected by Rues shit. They're both hurting too and all the love that Rue isn't willing to accept I for a fact that they will."

Sawyer was in shock. He was so right. All the attention and time she spent dwelling on Rue all the time she could've been putting into Gia and her mother. Especially her mother.

Sawyer was fumbling for the right words. She was very appreciative of Ashtray, and his kindness. This was the version that she grew to love so much.

"I-I don't know what to say."

Ashtray lightly squeezed her shoulder, "You don't always have to have something to say. Silence isn't a bad thing."

Sawyer nodded her head. She took a bite of her semi melted ice cream.

"How are you? How are you really?"

"I'm okay. I just have a lot of regret... and fear I guess." Ashtray lifted his chin.

"Fear?"

"Just about how everything is going to end up. My whole life is on the line and I-I'm just anxious. My brother and grandma need me and I can't let them down."

"You won't, I can't tell the future but I know everything will end up okay." Sawyer had moist eyes, "we have eachother through everything okay? I'm here for you just as much as you are for me."

Sawyer brought her forehead to Ashtrays leaning hers against his, "I promise."

They both nodded, keeping their foreheads connected looking at the floor beneath them.

all votes / comments are appreciated so don't be shy to speak ur opinions & ask questions!

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「unkownm122