━━ CHAPTER SIXTEEN / back to d'qar

The meeting with the General had been successful. Poe had gained access to information he knew he wouldn't have otherwise. And as he suspected, Eliana was useful to have there. She was so much more diplomatic, she knew how the Senate worked and she understood bureaucracy better than Poe ever could. He had always hated it when he was part of the Republic's fleet. It was all bullshit but Eliana had navigated it well.

It was a success and Poe was pleased. He tried not to show it but as they got into the holo-taxi to go back to the hotel, the corners of his lips tugged up into a smile. She gently nudged his leg and his gaze flicked to her. His stubble had grown back into a scruff now and she couldn't help but admire it, admire him. He seemed so pleased with himself but not arrogant.

"Does that settle everything?" She asked curiously. He nodded his head and she smiled. She knew that once she stepped out of the taxi, she would have to be limping again. She had purposefully chosen an outfit that would keep her ankle hidden. If she was supposed to have a torn ligament she had to at least act the part.

"When do you want to return to D'Qar?" The silence filled the taxi before she shattered it. Poe's head lifted and he shrugged. He wasn't sure when she wanted to go back. He knew that they were packed and could leave tonight but he didn't want to impose, "Did you get enough sleep to fly tonight?" She asked. He nodded and she smiled.

"We can fly back tonight. It'll be a few hours in hyperspace," He responded. She nodded and then the taxi came to a stop outside the hotel. Poe got out first. He dropped onto the street and then held his hand out for Eliana to take. She stepped out of the hover-taxi and stood in the chilly night air as Poe paid the credits due.

Then they headed back into the hotel but Eliana was limping. Well, she was pretending to limp and she hated it. The anxiety was likely written on her face. It felt fake, she felt like it looked fake and Poe knew. They had spoke about it before they left and so, once they were through the hotel doors, Poe stopped abruptly.

He then scooped Eliana up into his arms with absolutely no warning. She squealed and her arms wrapped tightly around his neck, clinging to him. One of his arms was under her back and the other under her knees.

"Bo, put me down," She said softly. He grinned and pressed a kiss to her cheek. He then began to walk towards the lift.

"No," He said simply. She scoffed but didn't try to drop from his arms. She knew that he would only make it harder for her and she was really just glad to have her feet off the ground. It meant she didn't have to pretend.

"You're a nightmare," She mumbled as she let her head rest against his shoulder. Her face nuzzled into his neck. He hummed softly in response and awkwardly pressed the button for the elevator. She stared at him, baffled. He could have easily dropped her and made it easier on both of them but he seemed intent.

When the elevator opened, a few couples walked out mildly amused by the scene but nobody commented. They got into the lift themselves and Eliana leant over and pressed the button for their floor before Poe could do anything.

"You can put me down now," She said as she turned to look at him. He shrugged as he leant back against the wall. The elevator began to move and she felt her stomach lurch at the change. She hated elevators.

"Kiss me and I'll think about it," He responded. She stared at him and he waited patiently. There was a moment of contemplation before she pressed a soft peck to his lips.

"Happy?" She asked. He shook his head and she sighed. She leant forward and pressed another kiss to his lips. But he didn't let her escape it. He followed her lips as she moved back, connecting them again. The feeling of his lips against her made her involuntarily let out a content sigh. Her arms wrapped around his neck, fingers running through his hair. There was something about his touch. It relaxed her, it was addictive.

When she tugged on his hair, he let out a soft groan and she felt her heart thump against her chest. It was dangerous. This was dangerous. His tongue in her mouth, his arms wrapped around her. Her fingers in his hair and one bed in their room. This could end dangerously and as much as Eliana wanted it, she couldn't let herself do it.

They both knew what Poe was like, what his reputation was. He had fucked his way through half of the Resistance by now and Eliana didn't want to be another one. She couldn't just be another one of the people he fucked.

One night stands, one time things weren't Eliana's style and Poe wouldn't change that. Even if she wanted him so badly, she couldn't do that to herself. Not when she knew that in another week, he'd have another person to flirt with and she'd be nothing to him. She couldn't get herself hurt like that. She had barely healed after Relya.

So, when the elevator door opened, Eliana pulled back. She was panting softly and she urged Poe to put her down. He did - with reluctance - and they walked back to the room, silently. He noticed her sudden change and he wanted to question it, make sure she was okay but it felt so hard to ask.

It was only when they were collecting the last of their belongings that Poe worked up the courage. He already had a feeling he knew the answer but it wouldn't make it hurt any less, whatever she said.

"Is something up?" He asked as Eliana shrugged her - Poe's - jacket on. She shook her head and met his gaze. But there was a sense of awkwardness, like she didn't know how to act, "Did I do something wrong in the elevator?" Eliana shook her head.

"I just know how you are," She shrugged and those words were a sharp stab right into Poe's heart. He stared at her for a moment and Eliana knew that she had picked her words wrong, "I just don't want to get hurt," She mumbled. Poe frowned, not understanding. But, he didn't get the chance to decipher it because Eliana had picked up the bags and was heading out of the room.

It seemed they were going back to the ship.

-

The silence had been oddly comforting as they travelled through hyperspace. Eliana sat in the co-pilot's seat, going through data logs while Poe watched the navicomputer and continued at his own work. He had managed to hack into the communication channels that the higher-up military officers used and it was interesting. Nothing of use but certainly interesting.

But eventually, Eliana got bored of datalogs. There were only so many times she could read over contracts and debates over funding for the First Order before it made her feel sick. All of the investors didn't seem to have a clue what they were talking about and yet the Investor facilitated them anyway. Made it seem like their decision was the right one. It was horrifying.

"Anything interesting on your end?" Eliana asked, disrupting the silence. She wanted conversation, she was bored and Poe provided much more interesting conversation than these Senators. She had joined the Resistance to get away from the stuffiness, not embrace it again. Especially after Relya, Eliana wanted to stay as far away from politics as she could.

"Not really," He shrugged as he glanced back at her. There was an unreadable expression on his face but Eliana sent him a small smile in hopes of brightening his mood. He had been unusually quiet most of the journey back.

"Unsurprising," She mumbled. Poe looked almost offended and she cracked a grin. He rolled his eyes and checked over the navicomputer again, "What time will we get back to D'Qar?"

"About mid-day D'Qarian time," He retorted. She nodded her head and looked back down at her datapad. She didn't want to go back to reading the datalogs so she switched it off and shoved it between her thigh and the arm of the chair. Out of sight, for now.

"Have you informed Leia?" Eliana asked. She knew he probably had but she wanted to be sure. Any unexpected crafts would be an immediate threat to the Resistance and she didn't want any issues. She just wanted to get home.

"Yeah. I sent a comms." His answer was short, snappy. He didn't sound particularly annoyed but he was acting different.

"Good," She mumbled before adding. "You're quiet." He turned to look at her and observed her face for a moment. He tried to work her out, understand whether she meant that as a bad thing. He just tried to understand her.

"I'm tired," He responded with a small shrug.

"I can take over if-" Eliana began but Poe was quick to cut her off.

"No." He said. It was almost a snap and she furrowed her eyebrows. She opened her mouth to say something before he said, "Wouldn't want to get you hurt." His tone was bitter but Eliana couldn't tell. Her mind jumped back to the X-Wing before the op and she scoffed. They hadn't mentioned it since it happened and now, he was using it against her.

"The X-Wing was an accident," She retorted, sounding almost offended. He looked back at her, his head tilted slightly.

"I know." His tone was straight-forward and blunt. Not annoyed, more confused. Not that Eliana really understood any of that.

"You can't hold it against me. I can still pilot," She argued and he shrugged. Poe quickly realised that she didn't understand what he was really annoyed about but he didn't have the energy to redirect the conversation. So, he went with it, a smirk appeared on his lips.

"I need to add it to the board." That familiar teasing lilt appeared and her whole demeanour dropped. That was a familiar tone. One that she understood very well and she hated that it had come out again. The mission had - somehow - meant she was mercifully free of that tone but not anymore. She should have expected it.

"Don't," She warned and he smirked. It was wider now as he turned on his chair. He placed his datapad down on his lap and leant forward slightly.

"Why not?" He asked, tilting his head slightly. She pursed her lips, staring him down. There were mistakes that she could put on the board for him but she didn't want to. It would make things very complicated.

"It wasn't my fault," She retorted simply. He scoffed and glanced over at the navicomputer again. He wasn't looking at the port for any reason other than avoiding her gaze. He couldn't deal with the constant eye contact.

"Oh, that's what they all say," He mumbled before he dragged his gaze back to her. Eliana had always been awkward with eye contact. There was either too much of it or too little and he couldn't deal with how she was looking at him. He felt like she could see into his head.

"You know it wasn't my fault!" She suddenly exclaimed. It wasn't out of anger or annoyance but more sad. Her arms crossed over her chest as she turned her chair to the viewport. Her gaze fixed on the stars that swirled around them in hyperspace.

"You should have been more careful," Poe leaned over to speak those words. His lips next to her ear. She snapped her gaze to his face and their lips were only inches apart. Her gaze briefly flicked down to his lips.

"I was plenty careful," She said. Her words were almost a whisper and her heart was thumping wildly in her chest. She couldn't be this closer to him again. It was a mistake. This op had been a mistake. Letting him kiss her so much was a mistake and she had made herself fall for him more by letting all of this happen.

"And you ripped open the fuel line," He shrugged as he sat back on the chair. The space opened up between them and Eliana felt like she could breathe again, "Not careful." He added before he turned his gaze back to hyperspace.

"You've not exactly been careful since BB-8 has been in the shop." It was a low blow. BB-8 was Poe's best friend, best little droid friend and Poe preferred manning the ship without a droid rather than having another. He was attached to the little guy and Eliana couldn't blame him. But Poe had been doing worse since BB-8 was wrecked.

The little guy had been in the workshop with the mechanics for weeks now. Eliana had a feeling that is why he had been so incessant in his teasing before they left for Coruscant. He didn't have his little friend to annoy, so he annoyed Eliana instead.

"I've not destroyed a ship." The brief silence was ruined by those words. She scoffed.

"You nearly blew our cover," She bit back. He turned around harshly and she met his gaze defiantly.

"I kept our cover very well," The emphasis on 'very' made her feel something. Eliana wasn't sure what but she knew it was something she didn't want to feel.

"Yeah. Relya was jealous." It was a small mutter, an off-hand remark but it made Poe smile victoriously.

"Good." He retorted and they both lapped into silence again. Eliana didn't know what to think about it. She didn't know what to do and she had no idea how to feel about Poe. He had been perfect the entire mission, kept their cover and was smart, impulsive only when he had to be. He was everything she wanted him to be.

But she couldn't adore him. It would only end in her getting hurt and Eliana couldn't let that happen. No matter how much being with Poe would be worth it, she couldn't.

-