I dotted little toes around a little boy's icing thumb print on his cookie. Ingeniously, Kazuya had brought bakers' markers full of food coloring for the kids and parents to use. They were just like regular markers, but with edible "ink". The cookies were also cleverly already iced with white icing to make drawing easier. A lot of the parents were helping their kids, and some of the older kids were helping the younger ones. Kazuya was surrounded by little girls who all wanted him to draw their favorite cartoon characters on their cookies upon finding he could draw anything in the world. It should have surprised me that he had this talent, but it didn't. He was always amazing. It made sense, because he decorated a lot of baked goods at French Cup, but he also decorated a lot of things at the shop, too. 

Still, he was on my mind as I observed the little boy make another thumb print of gray icing, and I dotted around it, too. I drew some whiskers on it. The boy made an admiring noise at my messy lines. "There, I think it's done," I said to him, picking it up and placing it into his happy hands. He immediately stuck it in his mouth without looking at it. "Is it good?" I asked, starting to laugh. He nodded wildly, loving this sugar cookie with chocolate and rainbow sprinkles inside of it. 

I left him to his cookie, and went over to Nikki's sister who was helping four two year olds create little mice on their cookies. They appeared to be all part of a little class together. I silently asked to help and she nodded gratefully. I poised my marker, and she placed a cookie on the rolled out drawing paper for me. The tables were covered in long sheets of drawing paper to make clean up easier. 

She was drawing a red bow made of simple triangles on the cookie in front of her, but I no longer thought this would symbolize that it was a girl mouse. It surprised me for a second. But, considering what I was wearing...

"Gyeong-Wan, you're doing great with these kids."

I looked up from the cookie I was decorating, and she was giving me a smile. "Oh- oh. Thank you. I like kids."

"Do you have kids of your own?"

The image of myself with Seo-Yoon and a couple of kids appeared in my mind. I shook my head fiercely. "No, I don't." My eyes landed on Nikki who was across the room, now holding a baby with a knitted pink cap on. The parent was beside him, talking animatedly to him as Nikki cooed to the baby, gently rocking the child. It warmed my heart more than I could say. Something in there yearned, but I quickly looked back at his sister. 

"That's a shame. I have one of my own. He didn't want to come, said it was baby stuff. He's over at my friend's place. That's her over there." She waved at a woman and she waved back. She was helping the little girl who'd asked the question about the strawberries. "That's her daughter, Mika. I've been friends with her mom since we were babies. In fact, I've been friends with most of the people here since I was a kid."

I stared at her inquiringly. Unsure what to make of this information. The little girl I was drawing on the cookie for tugged my flowy sleeve, and it was such a weird sensation. Almost like it didn't belong to me. I smiled at her and began to draw a mouse's face, a very bad one. She was two, so maybe she wouldn't mind...

"Hmm, you know," Nikki's sister continued. She drew a long, curly tail on her mouse. "Nikki and I went to school with a lot of the people here. We're all friends. It's really a small town, and this preschool serves three towns in the area. I think because they know us and Nikki especially, they're comfortable with him coming here in drag. Now, they don't like that he keeps coming here in practical Halloween costumes like vampires and Frankenstein, but they've always known he has pretty gothic fashion choices. You should have seen him in high school! But, that's their only gripe. They love that their kids get to meet a drag queen. They want them to be exposed to lots of different people. We brought a Catholic priest in here once, and one of Nikki's friends came here, too. She's a Wiccan high priestess."

"Oh, do you mean Colette?" It had to be her. It brought joy to my heart that the kids might have met her. She was so kind. Memories of her at the cat skull's funeral, with her being so gentle with it and sending the cat off with love. This was the kind person I'd want them to meet, too. 

She snapped her fingers and pointed at me. "Yes! You know her?!"

"Yes, I do. She means a lot to me." I grinned as I drew the ears on my mouse. I was getting better at this. The child was obsessed with it, trying to get too close. I let her as she made me giggle with her curiosity.

"I love her. I want her to come back. We made a cool craft together. She visited the three year olds class. We made mobiles with moons and black cats on it, because it was near Halloween. She loves kids, too. She was great with them. She taught them about Samhain, and how it's different from Halloween. She said it was okay to appreciate both, but told us about this whole other side of thinking about it."

"That makes me so happy."

"Me, too. I know Wiccans do a lot of cool things for spring, too. They have a lot of different traditions that are cool to know. Maybe around springtime we can come up with something. Do you think she'd want to?"

I knew for certain that she would. She seemed to love all things, no matter what form they came in. Someone like that would jump at this chance. I nodded eagerly. "She would. I know she would. You should call her." I finished the ears, and presented the cookie to the little girl. Her face lit up and she took it, doing a little dance. Nikki's sister and I both laughed and the girl bit into the cookie, running to her dad. He picked her up and began talking to her, loving her as she ate her cookie.

Nikki's sister handed me the last cookie, and the child it belonged to rounded the table so fast. It made me laugh with so much joy. It was as if my cheeks would never stop hurting with this smile, and I never wanted them to.

By the mid-afternoon, sunset was upon us in the late winter day. With it, it was almost time to go. A lot of parents had left with their kids after the cookie activity was done. Most of the kids who were left were running around in the yard and playing with the toys. It wasn't too cold, and they had on coats and warm looking pants and shoes. Many of the younger kids were way too cute bundled up, their scarves much too large. They looked like if they fell over they'd be too padded to notice. 

Nikki had made coffee for the remaining parents, using the preschool's kitchen. They'd taken it all appreciatively in mugs. It seemed like a common occurrence, but I also remembered what his sister had told me about all of them being longtime friends. What must that be like? To have been accepted for so long...but I didn't really know that. Maybe there had been a struggle, and this was the reward. 

Kazuya was throwing a frisbee around with the older kids, his heels off in the grass. His feet must have been cold on the frozen ground. It made me want to warm them... I turned my face away, my eyes as large as my smile. Good thing the cold was making my cheeks pink already, not that anyone could see it due to the many layers of makeup.

I wasn't courageous enough to play with the kids dressed like this, and I didn't know anyone else here well enough in order to talk to them. I felt like the odd one out, but I wasn't unhappy. It was fun enough to just watch them. I stared down at my work shoes, still wearing them since I was such a greenhorn. They stood out in my outfit, and reminded me of who I really am. My feet were stuck in reality, planted to the real ground. My feet were still at the hotel, reminding me that I still had at least one foot in that world even though I was dressed like this. That maybe, I didn't really belong and it was all fake-

"Miss Gyeong-Wan!"

I jumped hugely as I looked up. My mouth was slightly open as I caught the face of the voice, knowing already who'd called my name. My smile was back, after having left me for a second. 

Kazuya was grinning at me, his arm calling me over. The older kids he was playing with were dancing around, way too full of energy. His hands went around his pretty mouth. 

"Come play frisbee with us! Eri went home and now we need a fourth! We're playing ultimate frisbee!" He called to me, that dazzling grin there all the while. 

I...loved his grin. The way he was right now, in the lovely pink sunset, hints of purple in the air telling of the time. Like Cinderella, it would all go away in the darkness. So little time left. His strawberry blonde hair blew about his face in the cold breeze, the light of the sky making him a little like a silhouette as it shined from behind. He was beautiful, and my heart became-

The kids he was playing with started to run at me and I startled further, not expecting it. They were screaming, having the time of their lives, their arms outstretched to me. I tensed up, expecting them before they got to me. They grabbed my arms, calling me this new and lazy drag name. "Okay, okay," I laughed with them. "I'll play."

"You better be good, no beginners," one of the kids said, super serious about this sport. 

"Yeah, I play," I chuckled as they led me to this beautiful person. This incredible person who'd gotten me here. 

As he handed me the frisbee with a knowing smile, I made my stance to throw. Brief memories of our first meeting, him getting mad at me, that pink beret on his blond head. My fascination and knowing in myself, that if I just followed him then maybe he'd lead me like the rabbit into a wonderland. 

As the frisbee arced into the increasingly purple sky, I knew I had been right.