We were at the airport this morning. The cars were going past us as we stood at the entrance with Hanako and Chidori. I didn't want to say good-bye. They had their bags, too many bags for such a short stay. They should have stayed longer. It wasn't fair. 

Hanako was making small talk with Nikki, lingering, as Chidori rearranged their bags on the concrete for the fifth time. They didn't want to go, either. 

As I stared at their bags being arranged, my eyes blank as I already missed my friends, something poked my shoulder. I looked up, and Hanako was smiling at me, so pleased. He took my hands, making them go up and down in his merriment. 

"Hey, Kazu," he said.

"Hey." My voice was too sad compared to his cheerfulness. 

"What does a zombie say on St. Patrick's Day?"

A joke? About yesterday? It was impossible to me. Even more sadness and shame washed over me. "What?"

"Brians." Almost a whisper, way too pleased with himself. He grinned at me. 

"Oh my god, that is the stupidest joke," Chidori snickered into her fist, stopping from rearranging their bags. 

"Get it? Because the 'a' and 'i' are switched." He grinned at her, too.

"Yes, I get it. That's so dumb. I love you. Did you come up with that yourself?" She put her hands on her hips at him.

"Yes. I wrote it on the way here, because Kazu looks sad."

The more I thought about it, the worse the joke got. The fact that it may have been a little racist was even worse coming from innocent Hanako. I started cracking up with Chidori as Nikki just shook his head, smiling. 

Hanako poked me on my cheek. "I'll be back around Valentine's Day. We're still having the Valentine's Day event at French Cup, right? Miyuki won't want to do it. I want to work in your drag queen maid café."

"Can I do it, too?" Chidori picked up Hanako's computer bag and put it on top of a rolling suitcase. "I want to be Prince Edmund and heal all the lonely girls' hearts."

That sounded wonderful. What a healing, beautiful thing. They were always right back on the horse. It wasn't that nothing fazed them, but they were always going forward. Hanako had told me himself so many times that no matter what happens, you have to pick yourself up and try again. It was the secret to his unending cheerfulness and chill attitude. It was a good idea to remember right now. All those sad faces yesterday, the scared faces, too. It made me worried about next year's Zombie Walk. Would we get enough visitors? Would this attack scare them off? But, it was obvious that Hanako was doing his thing again. He and Chidori were right back on the horse, no matter what. I didn't know if I was strong enough for that myself.

I was nodding to them before I was even finished thinking. Wanting to see them again. This way, it would be barely two months until I saw them again. 

"Good. I want that strawberry frappe that you make for it," Chidori said, nudging Nikki. "I know you don't think it's coffee, but it is coffee."

"There's no coffee in it. How is that coffee?" Nikki nudged her back, smiling a little. He was sad about them leaving, too. 

Why did they have to leave? I wanted them to stay here. But, part of me knew that there was nothing for them here. Hanako had a job in IT up in Hokkaido, and Chidori was a teacher's assistant at an elementary school. They had jobs up there, a whole life. They'd tried so hard to start over. It wasn't fair that they had to start over. They'd come here so many years ago apart, but met at the drag bar doing drag. It was a beautiful story, a drag queen and drag king falling in love. But, now it was almost like that story was over. They hardly ever got gigs anymore. 

"I'll get the strawberry frappe every day," Chidori was reiterating, her hands still solidly and defiantly on her hips, "and you will happily make it for me."

Nikki chuckled. "Okay, okay. It's money, anyway."

"That's right."

"Oh, look. We have thirty minutes until our flight. Oh, dear," Hanako sighed, gazing at his cellphone. 

"We what?!" Chidori cried out. "Oh shit, we have to go! Bye! See you in February!" She threw her arm around me and I grabbed her, her leather jacket making its leather noises. I wasn't letting go, even though her flight was going to leave. Maybe if I didn't let her go, she'd miss it... "Bye, sweetie. It's okay. We're coming back soon, I promise." 

"You'd better."

"I promise." She kissed me on the cheek and I released her. 

Hanako came over and we switched hugging partners, with Chidori giving Nikki a massive bear hug. Hanako's comforting form wrapped around me, his softness. He smelled like something sugary sweet.

"Hey, Kazu," he whispered in my ear.

"Hey." Struggling over tears. 

"Brians."

I let out a snort, my body jumping in my giggles. He let me go, smiling at me. He poked my cheek again. "That's what I wanted. Keep laughing, honey. We'll be back soon."

"Okay." I couldn't help but grin back at him in my laughter. 

Nikki came over to me and we stood together, watching them go. They waved to us as they rolled their things inside, escaping the cold and going back so far away. It felt like we'd never see them again, but if we tried really hard, we'd see them soon. 

Nikki let out a long sigh, missing them, too. He turned around before they were out of sight. I wanted to stay until I couldn't see them anymore. He grabbed my hand and we walked back to his car as he jangled the keys. It was the only sound between us as we thought about our friends. 

As we drove back, I watched the city go by. It was so large compared to our small neighborhood. We really were just a few blocks of space. It was big when you were there every day, but getting out like this reminded me that it really was so small. Such a small place to protect, but it felt like we were losing it. Somehow, it was slipping out of our grasp. And right in the middle was the Modern. It was the first thing you saw when you came into the neighborhood now, with it looming over everything. It was almost the new symbol, like a giant flag that the other side had planted in our property, an undeserving claim to ownership. 

Nikki's cellphone played a musical ringtone, and he handed it to me since he was driving. I recognized the name on it immediately and put it on speaker. 

"Hey, it's your sister," I told him. 

"Yeah, it's Junko," she said, hearing me. There were kids in the background going nuts. Shrieks and whining. There were also tambourines and bongos. 

"What's going on over there?" Nikki asked, like it was no big deal.

"The kids are having musical instrument playtime."

"You couldn't have called me during naptime, huh?" Nikki looked to the side, ready to merge with traffic, listening to her, but not really paying attention.

"Nah. I like being difficult."

"You always do."

Rattling started up. What kind of instrument was that? Sounded like a snake. She made a giant sigh into the phone. 

"What is it?" Nikki asked in a knowing tone.

"Preschool is so boring. We do the same thing every day. I want to change it up. Remember last year, when you came in and read to them? They liked that. This class hasn't done that yet." 

I remembered this. I'd been so jealous.

"Didn't the parents not like that? That's why we didn't do it again. I know the kids liked it, but..." Nikki merged with traffic and we were on our way again, but this time I wasn't daydreaming out of the window. I was staring at his phone, at his sister's picture as she spoke. 

"Well, I mean, they don't get it, right? But, I want the kids to have a lot of different experiences with different kinds of people. It's like acclimating a puppy. Actually, it's exactly like acclimating a puppy."

"Yeah, but Drag Queen Storybook Hour? Really?" Nikki was definitely on the fence. I started bouncing in my seat, gripping the phone.

"I'LL DO IT!" I practically shrieked. 

"Holy crap," Junko laughed just like her brother. "Is that Kazu? Hi, Kazu. Please come and read to them. Bring them some cupcakes, too. Watching them eat cupcakes is always hilarious. Their parents get so mad."

"Can I read them a book about baking?" I continued to bounce, so excited. I'd been very sad just a couple of minutes earlier, but now... Oh, life was wonderful. All those kids, eating my cakes and listening to a book about baking a cake, or making cookies, or something to do with sweets? In half a second, I knew exactly which book I wanted to read to them. "CAN I READ 'IF YOU GIVE A MOUSE A COOKIE' AND MAKE COOKIES FOR THEM?!"

"Wow," Junko laughed way too casually. "You really want to do this, don't you? Hey, why don't we decorate cookies? That would be really messy. They'd love it."

"Okay!"

"Deal. Nikki, you're coming, too. Seeing them run away from you because you're so tall in your drag always makes me die laughing. You need to come. You have no choice."

"Okay, fine," he chuckled, finally into it. 

"I'll get them to make little chef hats out of paper. They can wear them on the day," she brainstormed on the spot. 

"That sounds amazing," I sighed blissfully, my hand going to my cheek to try to contain my grin, but there was no stopping it.

"We'll come up with a day. Arrange it with Yash so the store's covered. I bet it'll have to be a time that's kind of slow, not the morning. Mid-afternoon? Does that work?"

"Yes, yes, yes." I wanted to dance, I was so happy now.

"This is great. Okay, we're doing this. I'll text you guys. I guess I better go back and watch the kids. Hey, Hikari, don't pull Sachiko's hair! Okay, I gotta go. Bye."

"Bye," we both said at the same time. We hung up. I lifted the phone up and down in excitement.

"What have you gotten me into?" Nikki said, trying to sound frustrated, but it didn't work. His smile was sneaking up.

"I got you into something wonderful," I sighed happily, laying back in my seat. 

Always keep going forward. That's what Hanako had said. How perfect was this? The day was looking brighter, though yesterday was so dark. It was always a new day. Maybe viewing the world this way was right. Hanako was a genius after all.