*Troye's POV*

"Do I have to? I don't think it's doing anything but upsetting him." I sighed, leaning heavily against the armrest, my cheek pressing into my fist so hard it was almost uncomfortable. It was working as a nice distraction though, taking my frustration out on myself instead of Shane, who was really the one that deserved it.

When I agreed to drive him to the party I'd had no intention of using it as a bonding moment. I was just going to pick him up, drive to Marcus's house, then throw myself at Tyler because he was who I really wanted to be around. Yet I'd been here for almost an hour now and hadn't exchanged a single word with Tyler, through text or in person. And I only had one person to blame for that.

My plan had gone off the rails on the way here when Shane had questioned me on Tyler, asking something about how far we'd gone. So, naturally, not even thinking, I made a snappy comment about how we hadn't done anything and how I was getting tired of waiting on him. It was meant to be a joke, a comedic take on how frustrated I actually was with our relationship. I wasn't really asking him for advice and I didn't really want it. That was at first  anyway. When he offered to share his thoughts I'd immediately shot him down. It wasn't until we were almost to Marcus's that I couldn't fight the nagging curiosities anymore, breaking down and asking him what exactly his thoughts were.

After the flood gates had been open there was no stopping him, thoughts and opinions pouring out of his mouth. Some of them contradicted with himself, some were positive and some negative, but there was one recurring suggestion that intrigued me. He figured that ignoring Tyler for a bit would get me the attention I wanted, that my momentary absence in his life would make him realize what an idiot he was being by putting the move off. Apparently it'd make him realize I wasn't going to wait forever or that I wasn't as dedicated to him as he thought, which were both total lies, considering I'd be content to spend my entire life waiting on him, but that was beside the point. I wasn't necessarily against the idea of kissing him sooner and Shane was already too excited to say no to, chattering on about playing matchmaker like he was born to do the task. So I agreed, I agreed to avoid Tyler. 

I lasted about five minutes before I regretted the decision.

That was when my phone went off, my hands immediately jumping to reply to the one person that regularly texted me. Shane wasn't having that though, snatching it out of the center console and insisting that it didn't count as ignoring if I still replied to his texts. Which I guess made sense, but that didn't mean I was happy about it. Little did I know how much I'd dislike being deprived of him in person if that was the case.

And that's what led me to where I am now, sitting in the basement on an uncomfortable loveseat with no one but Shane, while everyone else was eating cake.

"Yes, you've already made it this far, it'd be stupid to give up now." He answered, breaking me out of my spiteful reverie. I sighed loudly, a frustrated grumble escaping my lips as my hands balled into fists.

"What if I don't care if it's stupid?" I snapped, turning my head to glare at him. He seemed to need time to think for his response, tilting his head to the side and biting his lip as he stared off at nothing. A smirk found his lips then and he looked back to me, a challenging glint in his eyes.

"I'll use your phone to text him your confession." He threatened, holding up my phone between two fingers. Immediately I lurched to grab it, barely missing it before he was snapping his hand away, turning his entire body away from me. My heart was pounding in my chest, just imagining how Tyler would react to that. It's not like I could tell him Shane had my phone, he'd never believe that. When had I ever let others near my phone in the past? Worse yet, I doubted Shane would word it right. It could be anywhere from 'Hey, I think you're pretty fuckable' to a seven-text-long emotional sapfest I'd be embarrassed about for the rest of my life.

"Shane! You wouldn't dare." I growled, watching with wide eyes as he held up the phone, exposing the screen that was opened to Tyler's chat. I didn't have time to think through my reaction, jumping onto him and earning a grunt as I reached around his form, flailing slightly as I tried to grab it back from him. I was so concentrated I didn't notice the sound of footsteps on the stairs, only registering the third person entering the room when a loud thump found my ears. I quirked my eyebrows, throwing myself off of Shane and to the other side of the couch, whipping my head around to look who it was. 

I felt a smile tug at the corners of my lips when I saw the head of purple hair from the back, slightly confused what had happened before I realized his head was pressed against the wall. Did he really trip and catch himself with his forehead? What kind of idiot is he?

"Ouch." He muttered, my restrain slipping as a full-fledged smile spread across my lips. It only lasted for a second though, before Shane was hitting my arm and reminding me what was going on. I'm giving Tyler the cold shoulder; or else. 

I watched with a blank face as he lifted his head, his cheeks adorably flushed as he turned to look at us. He lowered his head in obvious embarrassment, starting toward us. It was only then that I noticed he had two plates in his hands, my mouth watering. He does my homework and gets me cake, who cares if he's dense as fuck when it comes to making a move.

In a random surge of spite and admiration for Tyler, I found myself moving over on the couch to make room for him. He seemed delighted with this, grinning cheerily as he walked over and threw himself down. He took a deep breath before turning to face me, his smile only dimmed slightly.

"I figured you'd want some cake before everyone else totally devoured it." He said quietly, his eyes darting from mine to look around the room multiple times as he spoke. I'd never thought I'd like or even thought about at all what a shy Tyler Oakley would be like, but those flushed cheeks and nervous smiles were quickly becoming addictive. I wouldn't say I liked it more than the forward flirty Tyler I was used to, but I definitely didn't have a problem with it.

I tried to hide how pleased I really was with the gesture, simply taking the plate from his hand with a small smile. I didn't show the butterflies it gave me when our hands brushed together.

"Thanks, Ty." I whispered, taking advantage of him staring at the floor to study his features. His eyes were shy and unsure, but there was no denying the huge grin on his lips. It was like the small bit of attention I'd paid him had just instantly made up for ignoring him. 

I watched as he started to settle back on the couch, realizing he could see me from this angle and quickly getting to work eating the food he'd brought me. I took tiny bites, purposely prolonging the moment and excuse not to converse with him. As much as I wanted to, I knew he'd want some sort of explanation on why I was ignoring him, and I just couldn't give it. That, and I wasn't entirely sure Shane would let me talk to him at all, he probably has some secret plan to shoo Tyler out of the room.

After I finished the cake slice the room remained just as silent, my thoughts going wild as I tried to figure out what to say or do. Would Shane be mad if I talked to him? Technically he'd initiated the interaction, so that was sort-of a move. I doubt Shane would agree, but that didn't matter. I was about to speak up and talk to him, about absolutely anything, when he cleared his throat and started to get to his feet. My mouth snapped shut, resisting the urge to frown as he looked back down at us.

"I'm going to use the washroom, I'll be right back!" He announced, fake cheeriness radiating off of him. I wasn't really in the position to argue, just defeatedly nodding in acknowledgement along with Shane. He turned around immediately, not looking back at us once as he walked over to the stairs and started up them.

"Shane, what have you done? I swear to god, if you've fucked up our friendship with this stupid scheme I will not hesitate to-"

"Calm down. Sure things are a little awkward right now, but they're supposed to be. He's already missing you, it's only a matter of time before he comes back practically begging for your attention." I glared at him for a second, though the nagging image of Tyler pulling me off into another room and begging for my attention refused to be ignored, making it really hard to seem angry. 

"How do you know? What if he just gives up?" I muttered, showcasing my worries just a little bit. I still wasn't entirely sure I wanted to go to Shane for advice, but it was kind of too late now anyway.

"Trust me, he won't." Shane laughed, making me roll my eyes at how sure of himself he sounded. How does he know? Are Tyler's emotions really that clear to everyone else? Hell, I'm a mindreader and I can't even make sense of them most the time. 

I decided not to question him any further though, mostly because I could hear people starting down the stairs and didn't want to have this conversation around anyone else. 

I'd been excited to see Tyler come back downstairs, though with a quiet warning hum from Shane I remembered not to let my eyes follow him around the room like they wanted to. Instead I listened in on their conversation in silence, staring down at my feet and subconsciously shaking them to the beat of the music. 

My breath caught for a moment when they mentioned truth or dare for the first time, just imagining all the horrible scenarios that could come out of that. If movies had taught me anything it's that truth or dare almost always leads to uncomfortable sexual things and I wasn't really looking forward to that. There was only one person I'd ever consider doing stuff like that with and what are the chances people would dare us to do anything together?

My anxiety only grew when they concluded there would be no chickens, meaning you more or less just had to do whatever they said. Even worse, was the consequence if you didn't. Streaking in front of the entire neighborhood? Sounds horrible. Streaking in front of the entire neighborhood with the risk of hearing their thoughts in reaction? No way in hell.

Curious, I decided to discreetly eye Tyler for his reaction. He had sunk down on the couch, pure annoyance clear on all of his features. I had to remind myself I wasn't allowed to be caught staring when I almost laughed aloud at his ridiculous position. For the hundredth time, he was helping to put my nerves at ease. He wouldn't let them force me to do anything I didn't want to. Even while I was ignoring him he still cared about me.

"Alright, fine, let's play." Marcus concluded, my mood dimming slightly in reaction. I was not looking forward to this at all. Whether they asked me to spill secrets or participate in stupid dares, it didn't really matter, neither sounded very desirable.

The silent seconds that followed his announcement only gave me more time to over-think, my heart racing in my chest. I didn't even think before my mouth was flying open, my worries controlling me as I asked the stupid question I'd immediately come to regret.

"Do I have to play?" Way to not look like a total loser, Troye. I bet Tyler thinks I'm some kind of weirdo for getting so beat up over something small like this. I should just play it, it can't be that bad, right?

"Wimp." Sawyer's jab only reinforced my thoughts, making me sigh softly as my resolve cracked. I didn't care if they looked at me as a wimp, but I did care if it affected Tyler's opinion of me.

"Fine." I practically spat, trying and failing to hide the sour tone to my voice. I could practically feel Tyler's eyes on me, disbelief oozing off of him in waves. I guess he really hadn't expected me to change my mind. I refused to meet his gaze though, knowing all too well Shane was watching me out of the corner of his eye as well.

"Who's going first?" Marcus asked, leaning back in his chair and drawing my attention away from Sawyer. He looked around the room expectantly, though he probably only got about halfway before Joey was jumping up and shouting.

"Me!" He shouted excitedly, immediately turning his gaze on Sawyer. "Sawyer, truth or dare?"

"Dare."

"I dare you to prank call Caspar." I rolled my eyes at the girlish giggles Joey let out after he'd said it, like he'd asked him to do something simply horrible. Sawyer just pulled his phone out though, looking around the room to make sure he had everyone's attention before pressing the call button. He put it on speaker phone so we could all hear, throwing himself into an elaborate act of pretending to be one of Caspar's college friends inviting him to a party tonight. A party that obviously wasn't real. Caspar didn't show even a tinge of hesitancy, just accepting that it was his college friend immediately. Imagine how angry he'll be when he shows up at the 'party' to find nothing there. The thought alone was enough to put a smile back on my face.

I listened intently as the next few turns flew by, not once feeling the need to speak up. Part of me almost hoped that they'd forget about me if I was quiet enough, let me listen in but not really participate in the game. I had no reason to think otherwise, considering no one had even so much as looked in my direction yet.

It was Zoe's turn currently, her devious eyes scanning through all of her possible victims before landing on Tyler. I was excited for a split second, eager to see him flustered or pull off some crazy dare. However, just when I was sure she was about to ask him something, she whipped her head around to look at Shane and I.

"Shane, truth or dare?" She asked, her bubbly sweet voice a total contrast to the darkness in her eyes. She was scary, despite how much everyone seemed to love her.

"Dare." I resisted the urge to groan in response to his stupidity. It was stupid to pick dare ever, but to pick dare when she was looking at him like that, he had to be an idiot. He's just asking for it.

"I didn't really plan out a dare, give me a second." She mumbled, looking around the room distractedly. It wasn't long before she was looking back over in our direction, realization sparking on her features in the most intimidating way. "I dare you to kiss Troye!"

"What?" I blurted, dazed as I stared at her with my mouth gaping.

"Oh, come on, you two are the only gay boys at school and you've been all over each other tonight. No need to be bashful about it." She beamed, her eyes sparkling with mischief as they flickered back and forth between Shane and I. This is not happening. This is so not happening. She wants me to kiss Shane? Why Shane? I don't want to kiss him at all, let alone for him to be my first kiss. And even worse, Tyler's going to be watching. He's going to feel like shit.

I discreetly let my eyes wander  as I registered Shane trying to reason with Zoe beside me. Deep down I already knew it was going to happen. My alternative was streaking naked with Shane and that sounded even worse. That didn't mean I was happy about it though.

Inevitably my eyes ended up on Tyler, not even trying to hide the fact I was staring at him now. If Shane got mad at me for looking at him right now I would literally slap him across the face when he went in for the kiss.

Tyler looked stressed, his eyes wide and dark as they glared at Sawyer. Sawyer wasn't paying any attention mind you, instead focused on making some stupid quip about streaking buddies. His hands were balled into fists too, and I couldn't recall a time Tyler looked so... angry. It would have been kind of hot actually, if it wasn't for the context.

"If they really don't want to you can't force them to, it's not fair to-"

"Yes it is. So, what's it gonna be boys?" I left that question for Shane to answer, instead channeling all my attention to watching Tyler. It was sweet of him to speak up like that, even if it didn't really accomplish anything. It was relieving too, to know it wasn't me he was mad at. He had every right to be with the way I'd been treating him tonight, but he wasn't. 

It was almost heartbreaking watching the different emotions flicker across his face. He seemed more upset by the situation than even I was. He seemed angry, then worried, then hopeful, then altogether defeated when Shane turned his head to look at me. 

My head was facing his direction but I still refused to look at him, looking around the room as it really sunk in what I was about to do. My first kiss. Well, at least now if some freaky mind-reading thing happens I'll know not to risk kissing Tyler. Okay, let's be real here, I'd still kiss him. I'm too selfish not to. Maybe I can even imagine it's Tyler I'm kissing.

"Troye, are you okay with this? Because I don't want to make things awkward between us." Shane whispered quietly, making me sigh inaudibly. He would make me choose. Didn't he know I hated decisions? I have to say it now. I have to say that I'd rather kiss him than streak up the road, and I have a feeling that isn't what Tyler wants to hear.

What if he thinks I just want to kiss Shane in general?

Surely he'd realize how stupid that suspicion is. I know I haven't outright confessed to him or anything, but I have made my feelings clear in other ways. And, judging by the way he's been so forward with me lately, he realizes it too. It's all too easy to make a person doubt themselves though, as I know. Maybe I should reassure him.

"It's just a kiss, it doesn't mean anything. At all." I might have kept eye contact with Shane as I said it, but there was no doubt in my mind the message was for Tyler's sake.

Shane started to lean forward, clearly not needing any more reassurance than that. I squeezed my eyes shut tightly, waiting with pursed lips. I wasn't sure what kind of kiss we were going for or which way to tilt my head or anything. I over-thought it so much in those few seconds I found myself frozen completely, deciding that making no move was better than making the wrong one.

I almost jumped when I felt his lips ghost over mine, the kiss so gentle it was almost like it wasn't even happening. It definitely wasn't what I'd expected a kiss to feel like. It felt no different than my lips touching anything else. There were no fireworks or sparks or exceptional feelings, it was just physical contact. I didn't even get to hear his thoughts, not that I'd wanted to.

He pulled away after only a couple seconds, leaving me confused and slightly disappointed. It's not like I'd wanted some huge fireworks show or anything, especially with Shane, but I'd expected it to at least be enjoyable. What if kisses with Tyler are just as boring? What if I actually am asexual? No, I'd know that before actually trying it, right? 

There were people giggling like idiots around us and whispering stupid things to one another like we'd shoved our tongues down each others throats or something and it was actually starting to get on my nerves. From what I've experienced so far, I definitely do not like parties.

I completely blocked out what was going on around us as I watched Tyler, my heart dropping when he deliberately refused to meet my gaze. He looked absolutely miserable and the thought that I might have had something to do with that was horrible. I'd never felt so guilty in my life. What part of me thought that the party would be a good idea at all? 

When I finally let myself drift back into reality and took in my surroundings I was surprised to find everyone looking at Tyler expectantly. A few seconds later Marcus called his name, the laughing tone making it clear this hadn't been his first attempt. A smile found my own lips despite the tense atmosphere, watching as Marcus called for him again and Tyler just continued staring off into space. It was adorable how detached from the rest of the world he was, even if he was upset. 

I held my breath as Marcus picked up a pillow, resisting the urge to laugh aloud when he drew his arm back and launched it across the room. His aim was perfect, the small throw-pillow hitting Tyler upside the head with enough force to make him nearly fall over considering he hadn't been prepared for the impact.

"Tyler? Tyler! I've been calling your name for like thirty seconds, what's your problem?" Marcus laughed, completely disregarding the slight scowl on Tyler's features. I guess he got used to seeing him like that after being friends for so long or something. "Truth or dare?"

"I don't care." He answered grumpily, crossing his arms over his chest and only making me worry more. He really was upset. Maybe I should try to talk to him. Neither of us are enjoying the game anyway. That settles it, after this turn I'll go and ask him if he wants to leave early, consequences be damned.

"Dare it is then! I dare you to kiss Troye-" I wasn't sure what happened to me during the milliseconds gaps between each word he spoke and Tyler cutting him off. My heart had stopped when he said the word kiss, a strange whirl of jealousy overcoming me. I knew we weren't official and he'd kissed people in the past, but something about him doing it now just felt wrong, in every sense. He was mine, even if we refused to acknowledge it quite yet, the fact was still there.

My reaction when I heard him tack my name onto the end was completely different though. I no longer felt jealous, obviously, but I wasn't entirely sure what I felt now. What if the kiss did suck as much as my kiss with Shane? What would I do then? But it'd be nice to find out for sure, to see what it'd really be like to kiss him. But what if I messed up? What if I made a fool of myself in front of all these people?

"No! I can't do that!" Tyler shouted, gawking at Marcus like he'd suggested he murder children or something. There was no debating what that made me feel like, it definitely wasn't a good feeling. Was he that against kissing me? Why? I thought he liked me. He called me sexy, even if it was subconsciously, that should still count for something.

"You cut me off!" Marcus accused angrily, glaring at Tyler until he let his mouth snap back shut, giving him a chance to finish what he'd started to say. "I dare you to kiss Troye, with tongue."

Holy shit.

An unwanted heat spread through my stomach at the thought of kissing Tyler like that, my cheeks flushing as I looked over at him. I was suddenly hyper-aware of his lips, how pink they were, how plump the bottom one was compared to the top, how good they looked when he swiped his tongue out and wet them. For the sake of all things good, please let Tyler's kiss be better than Shane's.

I wasn't sure if I was more nervous or excited as I watched him turn to face me, our eyes locking in a strange stare-down of silent questions. Neither of us seemed to know any of the answers.

"In front of all of you?" Tyler asked, turning his head as he spoke. I felt the urge to roll my eyes at him. Where else did he think we were going to do it?

"Yep." 

"And with tongue?" He asked quietly, my eyebrows shooting up when I realized just how shy he sounded. At least I know I'm not the only nervous one.

"Yep."

"And if I don't I have to-"

"Streak up the road. With Troye, he was part of the dare." I scrunched my nose up at this, still just as against the idea as I had been earlier. No, I would definitely not be streaking this time. If I was willing to kiss Shane not to I was definitely willing to kiss Tyler, granted he was willing to kiss me.

"Guys, that's not really fair to me-" I started, trying to get the point out there that I was against the streaking, not the kissing. Zoe didn't seem to understand that, cutting me off.

"Aw, come on, Troye, why don't you just let him kiss you? You just said it was just a kiss and meant nothing, this is no different." Zoe said, obviously trying to comfort me. It wasn't comforting I needed though, it was reassurance. I just needed Tyler to make it clear he was okay with this, or even that he wanted to do this, and then I'd be completely okay with it. 

"Yeah, but this is different." I muttered, deciding that was the closest I was willing to go to explaining the type of relationship I had with Tyler. The kiss would definitely change things, whether it was for the better or for worse it was too soon to tell.

"How?" 

"It just is." I muttered, the finality to my tone making it clear I wasn't going to tell her anything more. She seemed a bit disappointed, crossing her thin arms over her chest, but I didn't care.

"Well, it doesn't matter if it's different or not. Kiss or streaking, your choice. Rest assured there will be videos of the streaking on every social media sight on the internet." Sawyer spoke up, only making me want to avoid the streaking option even more.

"I guess I'll go with the kiss, but only if Tyler's okay with it." I said honestly, knowing I wouldn't even consider it if Tyler said he would rather streak. I was far from forcing him into anything.

Tyler didn't vocally tell me one way or the other, but he did get to his feet and start toward the couch I was on. I was a bit embarrassed when I realized I hadn't even registered Shane getting up in all my thoughts about Tyler, but I quickly covered it up with a nervous grin as Tyler sat down next to me.

This is really happening. We can't back out this time.

Tyler didn't seem to be one to waste time, turning to face me with a gentle and comforting smile. I noticed his hand shift off of his leg, my eyes immediately falling shut as he started to lift it. I didn't really have the capability of closing them as tight as I did for Shane and I's kiss, too distracted by reminding myself to breath. He hand settled on my cheek a moment later, my body tensing as I awaited his next move. Was he just going to go for it? How do I know when to pucker my lips? To people actually pucker their lips for tongue kissing? 

As the seconds ticked by I got more and more nervous, adjusting the position of my lips and fighting the urge to open my eyes. Is he just sitting there staring at me? Am I doing something wrong? Oh, maybe his eyes are closed and he's waiting for me to lean forward too. I was about to do just that when his quiet whisper found me, my heart racing at how hot it sounded with him so close.

"It's just a kiss, okay? It doesn't change anything." He assured me, making me seriously wonder if I was disappointed or relieved by his words. It was good to know we could mess up horribly and it wouldn't affect our friendship, but at the same time, what if it went perfectly? Did that mean I'd know what it was like to kiss him and still be waiting on him to make a move?

I wasn't really sure how he wanted me to react so I just nodded distractedly, still considering the thought. I wasn't sure what to think. Though when I felt his hand slide down my jaw further and his lips ghost over mine, I realized it didn't matter because I wasn't going to be thinking anything at all for the next little while anyway.

"Hey! You can't cover it up with your hand! That's cheating!" I resisted the urge to laugh against Tyler's lips over her protest, using all of my control to just let him kiss me as he started to press them onto me with actual force. He picked up a steady pace, giving me plenty of time to learn as I experimentally moved my lips along with his.

This was already much better than my kiss with Shane, my heart thudding heavily in my chest as his soft lips worked against my own. His tasted better too, like the chocolate frosting from the cake, but not enough to be over-empowering, just enough to be desirable. It was only a matter of seconds before I decided I definitely liked this, relief flooding through me and clouding my thoughts so much I didn't realize what I was doing until I'd brought a hand up to Tyler's shoulder. 

I hesitated for a split second, shocked by my own actions, before deciding to just go with it. Tyler didn't seem to mind and part of me knew this wasn't the type of moment you were allowed to over-think. I slipped my hand further, feeling the short hairs on the back of his neck under my fingertips. I pulled him forward harder against my lips, my instincts urging me on. His grip on my jaw tightened, leaving me confused, but only for a second before I felt his warm tongue slip over my bottom lip. I gasped, not expecting to like the sensation as much as I did, trying and failing to ignore how hot I was suddenly feeling. I hesitated for only a second before parting my lips further, worried what would happen if I let the kiss get any more heated considering how into it I was now.

His tongue slipped into my mouth effortlessly, moving slowly as if giving me time to adjust to the new experience. What he didn't seem to realize was that I didn't need it, already more than comfortable with the feeling. It was hot, his warm breath mixing just barely with my own, the way his tongue felt as it pushed against mine. I could feel my cheeks blush as I realized I'd been subconsciously flexing my fingers against his neck, tugging at the short hair there the more into the kiss I got. I didn't stop though, deciding I liked the way his grip tightened just slightly with each pull.

Despite my caution about getting too heated in front of everyone, knowing I wouldn't be able to control my body's reactions, I was desperate to know what it'd be like to kiss him faster. I wanted one of those hot and needy kisses like you saw in movies, complete with hair-pulling and moaning into each others mouths. In the back of my mind I realized that was a lot to ask for our first kiss, especially considering it was only a dare, but I wasn't really using my mind right now, now was I? 

My hand slid up his head and my fingers wove into his hair, my grip on his purple locks tightening as my tongue writhed against his, begging for more. For a second he stopped his movements altogether, like he was debating whether it was a good idea or not, clearly having more control over himself than I did, but then the second had passed and he was kissing me eagerly, just the way I wanted. I found myself slipping up more with the desperate pace, having to take deeper breaths and not being able to keep up with him. He didn't seem to mind though, so neither did I. More than once I had to remind myself not to pull his hair too roughly or attempt crawling onto his lap, screaming at myself that that was not allowed in a first kiss, and definitely not in front of all these people.

When Tyler started to pull away not too long after I found every nerve in my body protesting, genuinely craving the feel of his skin against mine now. I whimper tumbled past my lips in protest, my hands grabbing needily at his hair and trying to convince him not to. He just smirked against my lips, puckering his slightly to press them back against mine. That wasn't at all what I wanted but I went along with it, realizing he hadn't been taking nearly as deep breaths as I had and probably needed a breather. I still wasn't happy though, pouting my lips out as I unwound my fingers from his hair. Who knows when I'll get a chance to do that again with our current relationship. And I really want to do it again, a lot.

We didn't pull away far, his forehead tilting to rest against mine as soon as our lips had disconnected. I kept my eyes closed, panting heavily as I tried to make up for my lost breath. My eyes fluttered open as soon as I had, meeting Tyler's in an intimate gaze. He looked adorably flustered, his lips fighting off a smile that just refused to be put to rest. I wonder what he's thinking right now.

Once the idea entered my mind it was all I could think about, how great it'd be to know his exact reaction to the kiss we'd just shared. It wasn't like me to embrace my ability like this, but it was different with Tyler. Everything was different with Tyler.

So with determination coursing through my veins I kept my gaze locked with his, concentrating everything I had on trying to read his mind. I'd never purposely tried to do it like this, always doing the opposite and trying to stop it from happening. 

I wonder what he's thinking. 

My lips quirked up into a smile, realizing he'd been on the same thought train as me.

Are my eyes easier to read than his? 

Not really, but your thoughts definitely are.

They must be. There's only really one emotion there to find, it couldn't be that difficult to pick it out. Then again, I thought he would have figured out my feelings for him by now, it's not like I've been subtle about how in love with him I am.

My throat suddenly felt dry, forcing the emotions from my face as I flickered my eyes away from his, my heart racing. My hands felt heavy as I slid them off his shoulders. I could feel my face twitching in protest, desperate to show some outward reaction to what I'd just heard. I wouldn't let it though, I know from experience how that would go. I couldn't stay in that moment with him either though, instead scooting to the far end of the couch as my thoughts whirred around in my head.

Love.

He's in love with me.

Sure it wasn't a confession, but there was absolutely no other way to interpret things this time. There was no 'maybe' or 'what if's to fall back on, to self-consciously convince myself it might not be the case. It just was. It was out there and despite how long I'd been waiting for it, it was the most overwhelming thing I'd experienced in my life. What did I do to deserve someone like him? What's going to happen when he finds out about my ability? Will it change everything?

It's not like I'd been lying to him, I'd just been withholding the truth a bit. I was the walking equivalent of 'don't ask, don't tell' and I was happy with that. I was perfectly fine carrying on like we had been and putting off the serious aspects of our relationship. But he had to know, sooner or later. If things did work out between us, like really work out, I couldn't go my whole life hiding who I was from him... or could I? 

No, that's not fair to him and you know it, Troye.

It's not fair to me either though, is it? I don't deserve all the stress of hiding it like I do, fighting so hard against a part of myself that obviously isn't going to just go away like I'd always secretly hoped. Even if it was just one person, just Tyler, it'd be such a relief to be open. I didn't even know what it was like to be accepted for who you were, every fault and quirk. I'd never given anyone the chance to.

It must be a good feeling though, having someone care about you so much that they look at even your faults as beautiful, just because they're a part of you.

"Troye? Are you okay?" I blinked repeatedly, coming back to the real world and cringing slightly at the feel of Shane shaking me. I shifted away from his touch, noticing the apologetic smile he gave me in response. At least he's picked up on the fact I don't like to be touched, I just wish he'd realized just how much I hate it. "Zoe asked you something."

I furrowed my brows, looking over in Zoe's direction. I was surprised to see her face in a totally serious expression, absent of her usual peppy smile. I was also surprised to see so many people had left the room. Tyler, Marcus, Sawyer, and Joey were all gone, making a pang of worry shoot through my chest as I wondered where they were.

Well, where Tyler was.

Did he run off after the kiss? Did he think I was ignoring him? Did he not like it as much as I did?

Zoe cleared her throat, drawing my attention back to her. I noticed Alfie had replaced Louise's spot by her side, worming in between them and resting his head on Zoe's shoulder. The three of them were all staring at me intently, Shane looking over at me with a reassuring smile.

"Truth or dare?" Zoe asked, her expression purely friendly for a change. Ignoring how suspicious that was I went with the obvious choice, knowing not to risk the alternative. God knows what she'd make me do or kiss this time.

"Truth."

"Do you have feelings for Tyler?" My eyes went wide, a blush invading my cheeks the same time a stupid smile found my lips. Overwhelming or not, knowing how Tyler felt about me definitely changed a lot of things. I wasn't nervous when I thought about my crush on him, just ecstatic. Which was great, aside from the fact it made it damn clear what my answer was before I'd even spoken another word, Zoe's squeals filling the room. With a defeated sigh, I nodded my head.

"Yeah." I muttered, watching in almost bemusement as Zoe reached over and slapped Louise's arm, bringing the other girl into the squeal-fit with her. Are these girls really eighteen and seventeen? They look about twelve right now.

Suddenly their giggles and noises ceased, a sullen expression invading both of their faces. What? Had they communicated telepathically or something? What made them stop?

"I'm sorry." Zoe whispered, looking over at me through her eyelashes, guilt clouding her features.

"Why?" I laughed, surprising myself with how easily I covered up my worry over her actions.

"Well, it just must suck having feelings for a straight boy who's as homophobic as he is-"

"Are you kidding?" I cut her off, surprising myself by how aggressive my voice sounded. It was usually no more than a whisper, especially while talking to people I wasn't very close to. I couldn't help it though, something about hearing her just assume stuff about Tyler like that irked me. The fact she didn't even try to get to know him before slapping the labels on him. "Tyler is not homophobic." 

Her eyebrows arched, clearly taken off-guard by how stern my voice was. I glared at her, protectiveness seeping into the gaze. It was only when her eyes lit up and that devilish smirk returned to her face that I realized just how badly I'd messed up.

"So he's in the closet then, huh?" She asked, wiggling her eyebrows. I bit my lip, slightly panic-stricken. Oh no, what if she tells Tyler I outed him or something? He'd be so upset! "Don't worry, we won't tell anyone! Scout's honor!" She beamed, clearly noticing my discomfort.

"Good, because it's not really my secret to tell." I muttered after a few second's hesitation, still unsure of how I felt sharing all these things with her. It was the same as when I'd talked to Shane earlier about it. I wasn't used to talking about my feelings or this secret-sharing stuff.

"So, in that case, does he like you back?" She pried, leaning toward me so far Alfie was forced to pick his head up. I debated what to answer this with, my cheeks heating up all over again when I remembered what I'd heard. Yeah, he definitely likes me back. You could even say he loves me. I wasn't going to say that though, instead shrugging nonchalantly.

"Yeah, I guess so."

"Then why aren't you dating?!" She screeched, picking up a throw pillow and chucking it at my head. I was shocked by how into it she was, considering this was literally our first time meeting. Half of me was weirded-out by it, my other half almost flattered by the attention. I wasn't sure why she cared so much, but it was nice to know she did.

"It's complicated." I answered simply, begging her with my eyes not to make me go into detail.

"You both want to bone each other, what's complicated about that?" My jaw dropped when I heard those blunt words leave her mouth, the flurry of images that accompanied it not helping me any. Now that I knew what it was like to kiss Tyler it only made me want to know about everything else we could do together more. "Sorry. You both 'like' each other."

"Well, we're both shy and it's our first time really having serious feelings for anyone and-"

"So basically you're both too pussy to admit your feelings?" Again, I was shocked by her blunt wording of things. For how sweet she seemed from afar this girl had a mouth on her. Still, it's not like she was wrong.

"Basically."

"Aw! That's so cute! Can I help get you two together? Oh my gosh, I can be like your wingwoman!" She was bouncing in her seat excitedly now, clapping her hands together like some sort of eager seal. I watched her face drop, confused as to why before I realized I'd subconsciously started to shake my head in rejection already.

"Thanks, but no thanks. From recent experience-" I paused, turning my head to glare at Shane. He rolled his eyes though, getting to his feet and starting toward the staircase. However on his way he dropped my phone on the couch beside me, which I took as an official resignation from his cupid duties. "-I know that people 'helping' is not what Tyler and I need at all."

"Okay, fine. But if you ever change your mind I'm never far." She probably meant for this to sound comforting, but really it just sounded creepy. I just nodded, starting to get to my feet to follow after Shane. I didn't really fancy staying here with all these near-strangers when the alternative was going to see where Tyler was. "Troye, it's your turn. Ask one of us before you go."

"Oh, uh, Alfie, truth or dare?" I asked awkwardly, walking until I reached the bottom of the stairs and looking back at him.

"Dare." He answered eagerly, flashing me a big smile. I furrowed my brows, trying to think of something I could tell him to do. I was really drawing a blank. However, he seemed to realize this, winking at me before nudging his head in the direction of Zoe. A smirk found my lips then, glaring at Zoe as I spoke his dare.

"I dare you to kiss Zoe. With tongue. For over five minutes." I practically spat the words, relishing in the revenge and the thrilled smile on Alfie's face. Zoe looked utterly shocked by my retaliation, clearly not expecting me to be capable of something like that. Her jaw was dropped and her huge blue eyes wide, occasionally flickering in Alfie's direction to glare at his cheerful reaction. Serves her right for making me kiss Shane. "Have fun!" I called over my shoulder, resisting the urge to giggle as I started up the stairs.

I was unsure of which direction to go once I reached the top, deciding my best bet was probably the kitchen. That sounded like a pretty 'Tyler' place to be. I was disappointed however, when I walked into a room with only Sawyer and Joey. I debated walking straight back out, watching with my eyes narrowed into a glare as they raided the fridge together. Ultimately I decided that'd just be spiteful and dumb of me, considering they might be able to help.

"Have you guys seen Tyler?" I asked quietly, staring at the cracks in the floor rather than at them. The pattern of the tiles was actually really cute, the way they-

"He's outside with Marcus and Shane." Sawyer answered dully, his tone completely absent of any enthusiasm. He sounded both annoyed and uncomfortable, which I guess was a decent reaction after watching Tyler and I make-out. I still wasn't entirely sure how long we'd gone at it for, but I was definitely sure it was longer than what would be expected of a dare.

I didn't bother answering him, just nodding and spinning around on my heel. I walked toward the front door excitedly, freezing when I got near and heard the muffled voices outside. They sound like they're having some type of serious talk. Would it be wrong for me to just walk out there and interrupt? Yeah, probably. 

With a sigh I fell onto the couch in the entryway, the effects of the long stressful day suddenly hitting me as my eyes involuntarily fluttered shut. I shifted around, finding a comfortable position on my stomach with my limbs all sprawled out in different directions. It wasn't even that comfortable of a couch, but given my current spent state that had hit me without warning, I could probably fall asleep anywhere.

I had actually started to nod off when the sound of the door creaking open sounded, my eyes shooting open when they had already started to walk inside. They went even wider when I watched Tyler run his eyes over my body, blushing when I remembered the awkward position I'd thrown myself into. Ugh, who even am I? Who falls asleep at their first ever party? Toddlers maybe.

Tyler didn't seem to mind it though, the hint of a smile even playing at his lips as he turned and exchanged an unreadable look with Marcus. It made sense a moment later though, watching as Marcus practically speed-walked out of the room. I wasn't sure if that made me uncomfortable or happy, suddenly realizing how horribly this after-kiss conversation could go.

"Was there something you wanted?" He asked as soon as the sound of Marcus's footsteps had faded, making me blush as I realized he was going to put me on the spot like that.

"I, uh, no. I just wanted to see where you'd gone." I answered truthfully, not mentioning all the other questions I had bouncing around inside my skull. He looked thoughtful for a second, as if wondering whether to believe me or not, before simply nodding and walking over to fall onto the couch beside me.

"So, how would you rate your first party experience?" He laughed, putting me at ease with the casual conversation opener. I settled back against the couch in relief, blushing when I realized he'd had his arm resting along the back though. I didn't move away though, and he didn't withdraw it, simply keeping it behind my shoulders. 

"I hated it at first, but it's turned around in the last hour. A good four out of five stars overall." He giggled at my rating method, the sound only calming me further as I scooted down on the couch. I smiled to myself when I got the anticipated reaction, his arm sliding lower with me to rest on my actual shoulders rather than behind them.

"Good, I'm glad you liked it." Tyler whispered, his voice full of sincerity. Seconds ticked by in silence after that, both of us just enjoying each other's company. That didn't mean I was comfortable though, too many questions left unanswered for me to really be at ease.

"Just so you know I wasn't ignoring you earlier, I was just having a weird day and needed a bit of space." I muttered, twisting the truth slightly. It's not like I could tell him of the failed matchmaker plan Shane executed, that'd be so awkward. He nodded his head, squeezing my shoulder where his hand had ended up.

"It's fine, I understand." As much as his understanding relieved me, his response as a whole kind of came up short. It left no room for conversation, meaning I'd have to bring up the next topic yet again. This one wouldn't be as easy though. I think we both knew we had to talk about the kiss. Sure we could pretend it hadn't happened, but it had happened, and I was quite certain neither of us would be able to forget it any time soon.

"Tilly?" I whispered tentatively, suddenly sitting stiff as I fretted over what I was about to bring up. How do you even bring something like that up?

"Mmhmm?" He hummed, his tone completely indifferent. How could he be so relaxed about this? Is he just that good at hiding his feelings?

More seconds followed as I debated every possible way to bring up the topic. Some were too forward, some too cheesy, some too vague, but none were perfect. I could tell he was starting to get antsy though, like unnerved by how long it was taking me to reply. He kept shifting or applying random pressure where his hand rested on my shoulder. I took a deep breath, deciding I'd put it off for long enough. I'd just say whatever came to me first.

"Did you mean it when you said the kiss didn't change anything?" My voice was barely audible, more a ghost of air than anything. He surprised me though, like he always seemed to, acknowledging it by sitting up straighter in his seat. 

"Y-Yeah, of course." He stuttered a bit as he started, immediately regaining himself and his cool and composed act. I thought for a moment about what this could mean, even concentrating on trying to read his thoughts, but I came up short. It could mean anything from he got a chill at the wrong time to him biting his tongue and stumbling over his words, it didn't necessarily mean he was nervous, right?

Still, it almost bothered me how confidently he was able to respond to that. Nothing? Absolutely nothing? Was he implying he wasn't going to force things to change or that it meant so little to him it didn't affect anything? No, obviously it meant something to him, how could it not with how he feels about me. I still felt the need to be reassured though, curious to see what he'd say if questioned on it.

"So nothing has changed between us? Nothing at all?" I pried, glancing over at him without turning my head. He seemed to be thinking, his bottom lip pulled back between his teeth and his free arm raised to run a hand through his hair. My mind seemed to be out to get me though, insisting I remember what it felt like to have that bottom lip between my teeth and that hair between my fingers.

"No, why? Did you want it to?" He asked finally, turning his head to face me and catching me staring. Thankfully he just seemed flattered, smiling widely at me as if encouraging me to reply. I shook my head though, stubbornly turning my head away to stare at the other side of the room.

"No. That is not what I'm saying." I insisted, trying to convince myself this was the truth. I wanted to be happy waiting like he was. I didn't want to be the one that needed more when he was perfectly content waiting it out.

"Then what are you saying?" He prodded, making me realize just how childish I was being. He was literally having to ease the answers out of me. 

"I..." I trailed off, realizing I had no idea how to reply to that. I'd been saying exactly what he thought I was, my stupid emotions getting ahead of my brain again. It wasn't my fault I craved confirmation, closure. I was tired of the games and flirting, I just wanted to be able to call him mine, no matter how needy and selfish it was. I didn't say that though, of course not. Because no matter how badly I need it, I'm not brave enough to suggest it. Instead, I took the cowardly route I always did. "I don't know, it's late. I should probably get home actually."

"It's 11pm on a Friday night. Since when is that late for you?" He laughed, sliding his hand off my shoulder momentarily to pinch my side. I jumped, though it wasn't very smartly considering I found myself jumping further toward him, ended up nuzzled against his side. That was probably his intention though, considering he pinched me on my opposite side.

"It's been an eventful day." I defended, a yawn finding me as if to emphasize my point. He sighed in response, leaning his head to rest against the side of mine. I didn't show how ecstatic this made me, how relieved I was to know the kiss hadn't ruined our touchy-feely friendship.

"Okay, if you have to go, you can." He sighed again, a purposely over-dramatic one that only he could achieve. I giggled, trying to fight the urge to turn my head, knowing our lips would end up practically pressed together if I did.

"Do you not want me to?" I smirked, hoping it'd throw him off the way he always managed to me when he called me out on things. Instead he just smiled widely though, shaking his head.

"Of course not, the longer you stay the longer we get to be together." I must have blushed crimson at that, cursing him silently for always finding a way to make me blush. It wasn't fair. He was so much cuter when he blushed than I was.

"As adorably clingy as that is, I really should go." I said, shifting away from his side. He nodded, hanging his head slightly as I settled back on the couch, a bit further away from him now. I was far away enough now that I could turn to face him without the proximity being awkward, happily taking in his features for what would probably be the last time tonight. "Night, Tyler."

"Night, Troye." He replied, his voice even softer than mine. He lifted his hand as he spoke, making me shiver under his touch when it settled on the side of my face. He slid it up to brush my hair back, letting it fall back afterward to cup my cheek. I let my eyes flutter shut as he ran his thumb along my cheekbone, realizing a second later what it probably looked like I was doing and fluttering my eyes open. He was still staring at me the exact same way though, all of his attention and focus fixed on me as he admired my face. Imagine if I kissed him now. It's the perfect moment really. I wouldn't have to explain myself then, I'm pretty sure my body language would make it blatantly clear.

All I'd have to do is just reach out and touch-

"Tyler! Sawyer is chugging a whole bottle of ketchup! Come here!" We both practically flew away from each other to opposite sides of the couch, making it clear Tyler had found the situation just as romantically-inclined as me if he wasn't willing to be caught in it. 

Marcus was standing in the doorway, his eyes wide in horror as he stared at the two of us. At first I thought it might have been a reaction to how close we were and that it made him uncomfortable, but as I watched him turn around and raise a hand to hit himself in the forehead, I realized it was no different than the situation when my father had opened the door on us. Marcus was angry with himself for interrupting. Does that mean he wants us together too? Literally who isn't trying to set us up at this point.

Realizing the awkward situation that left us in I turned to face Tyler, blushing as I took in his flustered state.

"Sorry, I should-"

"Yeah, it's fine." He cut me off, getting to his feet and walking over to stand in front of me. I gulped as he casually lifted a hand to mess up my hair, spending a second too long working his fingers into my scalp for it to be a friendly gesture.

"Drive safely. Text me when you get home." He said, concern leaking into his voice and unexpectedly making my chest swell up with pride, reminded yet again of how much he cares about me.

"I will."

A/n: sup hello. What. Okay, first of all, this is officially the most read Troyler fic on all of wattpad so hOLY JENKINS BATMAN. Secondly, the tumblr meet-up was today and it was an absolute blast. You guys are so talented and beautiful (and handsome. don't worry my male readers, I got you. I was actually surprised by how many of you there are). Anyway, yeah, that was insane and I think one of the best nights/days I've had in like months!!?! That's sad ok sorry, i dont have a life, let me life vicariously through the internet and my story character's lives. Also, I totally forgot last chapter but a cute little twitter user posted a FREAK SONG. RIGHT? RIiIIIkGHT? I'm going to link it on the side. Her links are all in the description of the video. Show her some major love because that song was my jam writing these last two chapters.