*Troye's POV*

For whatever reason (trust me, I regret it already), I had agreed to let Tyler drive me to school today. The last time I even got in his car was the day it broke down, purposely avoiding the tin can of doom ever since. However, when he'd offered last night and made the point about how much gas I wasted driving him around all the time, I couldn't find it in me to refuse. Looking back I really should have just asked him to pay gas money, but it was a bit too late for that now.

My alarm didn't wake me up on time today, meaning I had twenty minutes to shower and get ready before Tyler got here. That was totally impossible, which meant I'd definitely be sporting flat hair today and rocking the confused five-year-old look. That wasn't even mentioning the matter of finding my outfit, which I knew would take exceptionally long today. After Tyler's reaction to my lack-of-spirit yesterday, I'd vowed to take part in the stupid spirit week activities every day this year, just to prove to him I wasn't a total scrooge.

That wasn't where the problem laid though. The problem was I didn't own a single ugly Christmas sweater, for obvious reasons. Which meant I was going to have to raid the closets of my family members. Given the short amount of time I had to do it, I was going to have to ask for their permission. What's more embarrassing than telling your parents you want their ugliest Christmas sweater they own to impress the boy you like? It wasn't just the sweater either, more the fact that I was participating in spirit week as a whole for Tyler. I hadn't just been against it in the past, I'd skipped that week every single school year, refusing to participate but refusing to stick out as the only one not participating as well. My parents were going to be on cloud nine seeing I'd changed my mind, and for Tyler too.

I'd worry about that when I came to it though, stepping into the shower and momentarily putting my problems on hold. It'd be fine. I'll get out of this with minimal life-scarring and embarrassment this time. Surely the odds are on my side considering how many times my encounters with my parents have been life-scarring and embarrassing in the past, right?

I was wrong, of course. Upon walking out of the shower I checked my phone, seeing just how late it was already. Tyler would be here in five minutes! That sent me into panic-mode, my feet moving faster than my brain as I rushed down the stairs in just a towel. I clutched it to my hips as I turned into the kitchen, mouth already open to ask my question.

"Do any of you have an ugly Christmas sweater I could-" I managed to get the majority of the sentence out before I registered that the chair that I usually sat at, was already full. After that clicked into place it was easy to recognize the familiar head of purple hair, the thick-framed glasses, and of course the cheeky smirk as he raked his eyes over my under-dressed body. Fuck.

"A sweater you could what?" My mother asked, turning to look at me over her shoulder, her hands still buried in the dish sink. Her eyes went wide when she saw me, a fit of giggles filling the room from every family member as it sunk in just how little I was wearing in front of my crush. I hate them, every last one. Tyler surprised me however, staying completely silent and even offering an apologetic smile. 

"A sweater I could borrow." I finished, trying to seem casual as I gripped the towel tighter, sliding it up almost to my navel. I did not like the way Tyler's eyes were traveling. Okay, I did, but not in front of my entire family.

"Why do you want an ugly sweater?" Mom asked, her tone laced with confusion. I took a deep breath, totally embarrassed to admit the reason. It was one thing just telling them and putting up with their teasing, but in front of Tyler, in a towel, that was just unbearable.

I opened my mouth to reply, but the sight of Tyler standing out of the corner of my eye had me freezing. He walked over to me with an innocent smile tugging at the corners of his lips. I could feel my family's eyes on us curiously, all of them averting when Tyler turned back to face them, likely just to catch them staring. He reached my side a few seconds later though, grinning devilishly as he threw an arm around my bare shoulders, hugging me to his side. I grabbed the towel before it managed to slip lower on my hips, staring at him begrudgingly.

"For spirit week, Mrs. Mellet. He's being festive." Tyler explained, relief washing over me despite the awkward position I was still stuck in. At least I wasn't the one that had to explain myself now. Though I couldn't really be thankful for him when his hand suddenly started to slide down from my shoulder, down my arm and causing me to shiver. I hate him. Is he really being touchy like this in front of my family? Doesn't he realize all the questions I'm going to get on this the second I'm alone with them again?

"Well, he's definitely lighting up redder than Rudolph's nose! Very festive indeed!" I turned to glare at my father, hatred hopefully seeping out of me in noticeable waves. I knew I was blushing, but that didn't mean he could call me out on it. Especially not when he got that adorably obnoxious Tyler cackle in response.

"Dad, I just want you to know, I hate you." I said flatly, staring at him with my eyes narrowed into the most hostile glare I could manage. And, given the fact it was before noon and I was out of bed and already embarrassed, it was a very hostile glare.

"Shaun, go find the poor boy a sweater. Troye, go get the rest of your clothes on, nobody's enjoying the view." My mother laughed, mirth showing clearly in her voice. She turned around fully then, wiping her hands on her pants and taking in Tyler and I's closeness for the first time. Her eyebrows shot up, a smirk starting to find her lips. "Actually-"

"Don't even say it." I snapped, prying Tyler's hand off of me and turning to stomp out of the room. He could deal with my family, because I wasn't willing to today. I made the dramatic exit about as graceful as I could while just in my towel, wondering how we ended up in towels around each other so often. It's like fate just wanted us to be naked together at this point. Good to know I can rely on fate to help us out, because it's surely never going to happen if I just have Tyler to rely on.

I practically slammed my door in my haste to get out of their sight completely, immediately locking it behind me and marching over to my dresser. I pulled out random bits of my wardrobe, knowing it didn't really matter if I looked cute if I was going to be topping it off with a hideous Christmas sweater. Besides, Tyler had confirmed he was wearing that hideous cat sweater from a couple weeks ago, there was no way he could make fun of me if he was wearing that. I could walk back out there in a potato sack and still have a cuter outfit than him.

Despite how annoyed with all of them it didn't stop me from rushing, ever-eager to get back to Tyler's side. I grabbed my bag and stuffed all of my materials back into it, complaining under my breath about the way they'd spilled out when I threw it down yesterday. After that I swung it over my shoulder, glimpsing myself over in the mirror and trying not to scowl at how young I looked with my hair down. I hate it.

I still didn't have time to put it up though, sighing before unlocking the door and stepping out. I was immediately greeted by my father standing outside my door, his arms completely filled with sweaters to the point I could only see from his eyes-up of his face.

"What the hell is all this?"

"My Christmas sweater collection!" He announced proudly, wiggling his entire body given his arms didn't have the space to move at all. I groaned, glimpsing at the pile before picking out the dark blue one that caught my eye. I knew for a fact the color suited me well. I immediately tossed it back into the pile seeing the demented demon snowman imprinted onto it, opting for the lighter blue one. I was pleased to find it only had an array of white circular 'snowflakes' all over it, considerably less atrocious than the last option. 

Deciding that was the best I was going to get I dropped my bag and slid it over my head, pleased to find it about three sizes too big for me. The sleeves hung down past my hands and I waved them contently, picking up my backpack with one hand and dragging it behind me as I practically skipped down the stairs. I actually didn't mind the whole ugly sweater thing. This one wasn't itchy and wool like Tyler's and it was insanely comfortable given the size of it. Then again, it probably just made me look more like a fetus, adding to the effect of my flat hair tremendously. 

I walked into the kitchen as soon as I reached the first floor again, pausing in the doorway to drop my jaw. 

"Tyler!" I groaned, watching as he innocently looked up at me, slowly moving the fork the rest of the way to his lips. I could have killed him, taking in how comfortable he looked curled up on my chair, shuffling bites of scrambled egg into his mouth. Tyde seemed to have left already, Sage still sitting next to Tyler and looking at him in a way that made it clear they'd been having a conversation before I returned. Realizing Tyler wasn't about to stop on his own accord I stomped over, grabbing his wrist and trying to pry the utensil out of it while he struggled to chew and swallow the bite of food.

What's his problem? Why's he in such a rush?

"Tilly, we're going to be late for school!" I hissed, only realizing after I said it what an idiot move it was.

"Aw, you have a pet name for him? That's adorable." Sage cooed, another groan escaping my lips. I just wanted to get out of here already, I'd had more than my fair share of family for this morning. Possibly this lifetime. "Does he have a pet name for you too?"

"Yeah, sometimes I like to call him Big Daddy." My jaw dropped again at Tyler's bubbly quip, watching my mother and Sage join me in gaping at him wide-eyed. He didn't seem to regret it though, possibly even expecting this reaction as his head fell back, laughter filling the room.

"Tyler!" I snapped, bringing my hand down to slap the top of his head. Realizing it was a joke my mother and sister started to laugh along, their eyes fixed on me and speaking silently. They were never going to let me hear the end of this, oh god. "I hate you, so much."

"Come on, it's not good to skip out on breakfast. Who cares if we're a bit late for first period, your health comes first." He persuaded, lifting his arms to snake it around my waist. I didn't miss Sage's lingering eyes that followed the movement, but I made no effort to pull away either. I was curious what he planned on doing, curious if I'd hear any thoughts.

"He's right, you know." My mother added, only to turn back to the stove and start to scoop out what was probably my breakfast. I hadn't planned on actually eating it. I never did, always rushing to get out the door and to Tyler. Then again, I'm already with Tyler. 

"Any other time you'd be yelling at me to get out the door!" I said skeptically, sinking down onto my seat, sharing it with Tyler. We were both half falling off but we were also both stubborn as hell, refusing to give in and just separate seats. I settled as comfortably as I could, sighing as he tilted his head to rest against my shoulder, whispering something and making it clear no one else in the room was supposed to hear.

"Stop being so grumpy, babe. Where's your Christmas cheer?" I blushed, wondering why he'd tried so  hard to cover up something like that. Just because he called me babe? Just to make the moment more intimate? Either way it seemed to have worked. I wasn't going to let him know that, determinedly clinging to my morning grumpiness.

"I think I left it in my other pants-" He pinched my hip at my sarcastic response, causing me to nearly fall off the chair in my attempt to get away from the touch. I smacked his chest this time, knowing the flimsy hit probably didn't even hurt but still attempting to show my annoyance through it. It somehow ended up a competition of sorts, both of us flailing our hands in pathetic slaps and completely disregarding our meals. That is, until my father walked back into the room, both of us freezing.

"You're going to be late for school." He said dully, looking over the three of us still sitting at the table. 

"Can I just stay home? Please?" Sage piped up immediately, batting her eyelashes up at him. He just shook his head though, taking his usal seat and flipping open the morning paper.

"No, Sage." He said simply, looking up at her for only a second before returning to reading. She sighed loudly, draping herself dramatically over the table, expertly avoiding Tyler and I's unfinished meals.

"You let Troye stay home every year during spirit week! It's not like we even learn anything." I froze at her sudden confession, wondering how Tyler would react to knowing that. He must think I'm a total weirdo now, forcing my parents to let me stay home I hated the event so much. However, whatever it was he thought about it, went unshown, his face completely blank as he looked around the room again. He was probably taking notice of all the Christmas decorations my mother had insisted we set up in every room of the house. The nutcrackers lining the tops of the cupboards were terrifying, especially when I made 3am food runs and felt their eyes all over me in the dead of night.

I quickly turned away when Tyler started to look back toward me, way too stubborn to let him see that I'd been staring. But my gaze ended up focused in front of me, falling on my smirking father and realizing he had definitely noticed the staring. He didn't say anything though, just grinning slightly as he looked back to his paper. I noticed then that Sage had left too, probably in an angry rush because she didn't get her way.

"So, are you guys going to go too?" My mother asked, the gross sound of the sink draining starting as she pulled the plug. I made a face, watching her wipe her hands off again on a dish towel before making her way to the chair Sage had just abandoned.

"Are you offering an alternative here? Staying home?" I asked hopefully, not dwelling on what that would mean for Tyler. I'm sure he'd skip with me if he had the option, especially if it meant laying around the house doing nothing in particular.

My mother seemed to be genuinely considering, making me seriously wonder why I didn't think to get an almost-boyfriend before. If their obsession with Tyler gets me more days off from school then I really wish I had of met him a couple of years ago. Well, really met him.

"Shut-up, we have to go to that committee after school. It's our first day really doing anything." I sighed loudly, angry that he chose today of all days to be reasonable, when I actually had a hope of staying home without getting in trouble. He had a point though, we couldn't just leave Zoe completely alone. Yesterday after school had actually been pretty fun, mostly just discussing all the things we were going to do and looking up cool ideas on the internet. Sure, Zoe made her fair share of 'Troyler' puns and quips, but never to the point it got annoying. Could that even get annoying? I quite liked listening to people talk about how cute Tyler and I were together.

"Committee?" I blushed, realizing I'd neglected to tell my family about it. It wasn't that I was keeping it secret so much as just forgetting. None of them had even questioned how late I was getting home yesterday, probably just assuming I was out doing something with Tyler. Well, they weren't wrong, but it was almost concerning how much they encouraged us to hang-out. Where most parents would be cautious about their kids going out and getting in relationships they were practically grabbing me by the hair and smushing our faces together. Very backward methods if you ask me, but I couldn't really complain. It was a lot better than having them forbid me from seeing Tyler or something. Oh god, can you imagine that?

"Kinda like a prom committee. We're organizing the music, food, and decorations for the dance on Friday." I was thankful for Tyler being the one to explain, once again saving me from the awkward questions and looks I'd get if I tried to put it into words. If I had of been the one to say it they probably would have questioned my motives for joining as well, which I didn't really want to share right next to Tyler. 'Oh, I only joined so I can spend even more of my conscious time trailing around after Tyler.' 

"Oh, are you two going together?" My mother asked, her eyes lighting up excitedly. She's probably thinking of all the picture opportunities already. I felt Tyler stiffen next to me, knowing he wasn't about to answer this question for me.

"I'm not going, Mom. I don't do crowds." I said quietly, my tone meek but still completely serious. Her face fell, her and my father both sighing in unison.

"Poor Tyler, I don't know why you put up with him." She said dramatically, causing me to scoff and roll my eyes. He puts up with me because he loves me, obviously.

"Me either, Laurelle, he's not worth it in the slightest- Ow!" I cut him off with an actually effortful punch, jabbing my fist right into his gut. Of course I knew he was just teasing, but I much preferred the idea of him sticking up for me and elaborately describing all the reasons I was worth it.

I went to punch him again, his hand grabbing mine and forcing it down against his leg, weaving our fingers together and holding me firmly enough it was clear I wasn't allowed to hit him again. My parents just exchanged a look, my father getting to his feet and walking over to where the coffee machine had been quietly brewing.

"You'll be back by six though, right?" He asked as he poured a cup, not even looking over at us as he spoke. I nodded before it fully sunk in he couldn't see me, deciding to backtrack a bit and try to cover up my slip-up.

"Why?" I asked curiously, wondering why it mattered to them today when it hadn't yesterday.

"We're going to the tree lot!" He exclaimed excitedly, throwing his hands up in the air for dramatic effect as he spun around to face us. It was like he'd been just waiting for a chance to announce it, so for his sake I threw a huge excited smile on my face as well. 

We'd been going to the tree lot as a family for as long as I could remember, Steele even coming home to join us most holidays. He was with his girlfriend's family right now though, but he'd be here for Christmas itself.

"Yeah, I should be back by then." I said cheerily, knowing Tyler was probably staring at my ecstatic face in disbelief. He knew just how much I hated the winter and the snow, seeing right through my act that my father was so blind to.

When I turned to face him I was shocked to see his thoughtful expression, looking like he was debating whether to say something or not. What if he asks why I'm so cheerful about tree hunting? Dad would be crushed to know I didn't find it as exciting as I did when I was five. I'll just suggest we leave for school, Tyler won't argue with me on that.

"We should-"

"Hey! Tyler! You should come with us!" I wasn't sure if I was more annoyed with him for cutting me off or for inviting Tyler without my permission, but either way I found myself shooting daggers at my father from across the room.

"Tree hunting?" Tyler asked cautiously, clearly getting used to the idea and probably debating if it even appealed to him. Why would he want to come to some crummy tree yard and trudge around in the snow with us, freezing our asses off? Ugh, why does my father insist on being such an idiot sometimes.

"Yeah! You can come over for dinner afterward, we'll make a night out of it!" He chirped excitedly, settling back at the table across from us, his fresh cup of coffee between both of his hands. I waited patiently for Tyler's reply, curious to see whether he'd go along with it for my father's sake or just be honest. Surely he wouldn't actually want to go.

"That's a lovely idea, Shaun, but make sure he even wants to first, don't peer pressure him into it." My mother laughed, earning a scoff from her husband before he was turning his attention fully to Tyler. He was smiling expectantly, making it very clear which choice he'd prefer. I wasn't expecting it when Tyler turned to look at me, an unspoken question in his eyes. Why does he want my permission? If he wants to freeze his butt off with my annoying family and I he's more than welcome. Hell, maybe he'll even find a way to make it enjoyable. I wouldn't put it past him, everything's better when he's around. 

I nodded my head, silently telling him I was okay with it. I wasn't expecting it when he gave an ear-to-ear smile in reaction either, looking positively ecstatic about my approval. He is such a loser.

"Yeah, it sounds like fun!" He chirped, turning back to face my parents. They smiled back, leading into what could easily be mistaken as a competition who could smile the biggest for the longest. Deciding I'd had about enough of their ridiculously cheery morning personalities, I got to my feet without another word. I grabbed my bag and started out of the room, not even checking to make sure Tyler was following.

I made it out the door and just off the steps before I heard any sign of him behind me for the first time, the door opening again after I shut it. I paused for a second, debating whether to wait for him or keep walking. I'll keep walking, serves him right for being so obnoxiously happy and so chummy with my embarrassing parents. I made it about half a step before I was toppling over, squealing and flailing my arms out in hopes of catching myself. 

I fell into the snow face first, gasping at the temperature and rolling over immediately, Tyler falling off my back with a cackle. Did he seriously just jump off the porch steps onto my back? What is he, five? I groaned, sitting up and already knowing my entire outfit was soaking through.

"I literally hate you." I groaned, looking over at him and widening my eyes when I saw how dry his clothes were. Oh yeah, probably because he used my body to catch himself. He saw me staring, eyes wide like he was about to bolt if he needed to. He never got the chance though, only getting half to his feet before I punched him in the back of his knee, his legs giving out and body falling back into the snow. I immediately grabbed a handful, throwing it into his face roughly before getting to my feet. I grumbled under my breath as I brushed myself off, looking up only when I was finished. My jaw dropped when I noticed Tyde and Sage still standing at the end of our drive, the bus idling in front of them. Great, a bunch of fellow students just watched me roll around in the snow like a child with that idiot. 

Tyde and Sage burst into a fit of laughter before turning and quickly scrambling onto the bus, as if they thought I'd fly into them with that many witnesses watching. Instead I stood there frozen, staring dumbfounded back at all the curious eyes looking out their windows at me. Tyler was still on the ground, sitting in the snow and obviously giving up and salvaging his outfit as he cleaned his glasses off. He still looked like he was on cloud nine though, his cheeks adorably flushed and a smile on his lips as he continued to swipe at the lenses. 

It wasn't until after the bus had drove off that I swallowed my pride and extended a hand to him. He looked up adoringly, grabbing it and shocking me with how frozen his hands were. It wasn't actually on-purpose when I let go, my body not expecting how cold his was. He probably thought it was though, screeching as he fell back into the snow. He immediately rolled over onto his hands and knees, visibly shivering before stumbling to stand up. Once he'd managed to he turned to face me with a glare, just shaking his head when I reached out a hand for his, a silent peace offering.

"We're going to miss first period at this rate." I muttered, knowing the bus was late as it was. I would never have joked around with him like that if I thought there was even a chance of the bus seeing us. Leave it to me to play around the day it's late.

"Good, maybe if you have time to style your hair you'll stop acting like you have a stick up your ass." My jaw dropped at his snappy comment, worrying for about two seconds that he was seriously upset with me. However then he was laughing, that adorably obnoxious laugh where he threw his head back and clutched his stomach, and I knew it was stupid to even think something like that.

I didn't show how much I treasured his reaction though, instead crossing my arms and stomping up the steps. I knew he'd follow so I held the door open for him, wiping my shoes off on the mat before kicking them off. I walked into the house, biting my lip as Tyler shut the door behind him, the noise surely noticeable by my parents if they were still in the kitchen.

"Troye?" My mother called out, worry slipping into her voice. I wasn't sure what exactly she was expecting, but she always found a way to assume the worst. She appeared in the doorway of the kitchen a moment later, the concern on her features quickly flickering into a knowing smile. "What happened?"

"Tyler being an idiot happened." I muttered, ignoring the teasing light in her eyes. She knew exactly what happened. I looked to Tyler for him to confirm, watching as he fought off a smile of his own, shrugging his shoulders innocently. 

"What can I say? He looked like he needed a moment to cool off." I groaned at his horrible pun, kicking him in the foot before continuing toward the stairs, not bothering to exchange another word. I was about halfway up when laughter sounded from the kitchen, my mother likely reporting the story back to my father.

I gestured for Tyler to go into my bedroom, steering off course without him into my parent's room. I found the pile of Christmas sweaters on the bed, knowing there'd be no way Tyler would take his off unless he had an alternative. He was way too into this stupid spirit week shit. That didn't stop me from gathering up every single one in my arms though, deciding in the back of my mind that he should have his pick out of all them. 

I awkwardly carried the ball of sweaters down the hall and through my open door, kicking it shut behind me. I couldn't see Tyler over the pile but I did hear his intake of breath, obviously excited about what I'd brought back. I threw them all down onto the bed, surprised to find him awkwardly standing at the foot of it rather than sitting- Oh yeah, he's soaked.

"Here, you're lucky my dad seems to have an abundance of hideous holiday sweaters." I laughed, gesturing to the pile and watching his face light up as he walked over, immediately starting to sort through them. He picked up the same one I'd almost chosen earlier, giggling at the demon snowman. I watched him for a few seconds before noticing the pool of water collecting by his feet as the snow melted off his pants, the mess sending me into hyperdrive as I turned and headed over to my dresser. 

I rummaged around with a determined lip bite, knowing that the pants I was looking for were in here somewhere. Tyler had forgotten them here ages ago, just like how I'd been forgetting to give them to him practically every day. However, in this situation with the sudden reminder and him right here in my room, it would be pretty hard to forget.

I grinned in triumph as I saw the beige resting in the bottom of the drawer, grabbing it and dragging it out. I stood up, beginning to speak as I turned around.

"Also very lucky you forgot this pair of pants here on Halloween and I kept forgetting to give them-" I stopped speaking mid-sentence, not entirely trusting myself to get a single coherent word out as I watched Tyler lift his hands behind his head, gripping his wet t-shirt and stripping it off. I bit my lip, raking my eyes over his exposed chest and appreciating the way his damp skin glistened. Once again, fate is determined to get us naked together.

He tossed it to the floor carelessly, landing on top of his utterly soaked sweater that he must have stripped off while I was searching for his pants. I didn't let my eyes follow the movement though, instead focusing on his muscles intently. I didn't even look away when he finished and looked back up at me, quirking his eyebrows at my intense stare. At first I thought he was going to tease me, his mouth immediately turning into a cheeky smile. But when I still made no move to react or do much of anything other than blatantly check him out, something in his mood seemed to shift, the smile fading to a smirk and his eyes narrowing in thought.

I gulped as he started toward me, not entirely sure what to expect but willing to go along with just about anything he initiated. He came to a stop less than a foot away from me, freezing as if giving me time to react. I still couldn't though, only managing a shy smile in his direction. He smiled back, albeit a bit more cunning than his earlier one. I found myself practically quivering in anticipation as he raised his hand to my cheek, hoping he'd take my jittering as a reaction to the cold instead. He cupped it gently, my eyes fluttering shut immediately and my hand balling into nervous fists at my sides. However seconds ticked by and he made no move other than running his thumb over my bottom lip, a movement that had me momentarily jumping thinking it was his lips on mine. Realizing it wasn't, my eyes fluttered open, likely full of confusion as they locked with his again.

He was still smirking, clearly content with himself and the reactions he was pulling out of me. Did I really just close my eyes when he wasn't even going to kiss me? Way to seem desperate, Troye. Why am I such an idiot. I probably weirded him out and-

"You know, you might catch a pneumonia if you stay in these wet clothes." He whispered, my breath catching in my throat at the seductive tone. I wasn't worrying that I'd weirded him out then anymore, instead focusing on keeping my reactions appropriate and not weirding him out that way. He slid his hand from my cheek to rest on my shoulder, only staying there for a second before it was moving lower, gripping the hem of my t-shirt tightly between his fingers. His eyes looked back up to mine questioningly, immediately greeted by my shy nod. He used his other hand to help guide it, tugging the shirt over my head with minimal struggle.

My heart was racing in my chest as he tossed the shirt over his shoulder, leaving us both standing shirtless and so close our bare chests were practically touching. He bit his lip, the movement doing nothing to help the frustration I was feeling all of the sudden. He reached forward, seeming almost hesitant. It wasn't until I really focused on the movement that I noticed his hands were shaking slightly, making it clear he wasn't quite as confident as he acted. He didn't chicken out though, his hands coming to rest on either side of my hips lightly.

God, I want to touch him.

I blushed at Tyler's thoughts, knowing I should have expected something like that but surprised all the same. Summoning all of my courage I decided to help him out, my hands coming to rest on his and sliding them higher. His jaw clenched, hands sliding up my stomach and pausing on my chest. He quirked an eyebrow when he looked up and caught me watching his reactions intently. I blushed deeper, the tension between us intoxicating. I still couldn't look away though, my eyes staying locked with his as my heart thudded insistingly inside my chest. He smirked suddenly, showing the beginnings of a grin before his hands shifted again, fingers tweaking both of my nipples simultaneously. 

I gasped and took an unsteady step backward, the realism of the situation suddenly setting in, like a cloak being lifted. I'm not doing this right now, right before I'm supposed to leave for school and with my parents downstairs. Hell, I'm not even sure exactly what 'this' is, considering our non-existent relationship status, idling in the space between friends and something more. No, it was better to stop it here before we did something stupid.

"I-I should go get dressed. You know, don't want to catch a pneumonia and all." I stuttered out, cursing myself for how nervous my voice sounded. He immediately took a step back, nodding in agreement as he raised a hand to brush his damp hair back.

"Yeah, you're right... Sorry, couldn't help myself." I nodded, offering an understanding smile before quickly turning and grabbing the clothes I'd picked out off the dresser. I didn't even risk another glance in his direction before turning around and walking into my washroom. I closed the door behind me gently, pretending to be composed. I wasn't actually, but I could act like it until I was out of his sight at least.

After I was out of his sight with the door closed though, that was fair game. I brought my hands up to squish my face up, disbelief coursing through my veins. Did that just happen? Is this another one of those dreams? It felt real. It felt really real.

I walked over to the sink, glimpsing at my flat hair and flushed cheeks. Sure I knew something like this was coming, it was only a matter of time before one of us snapped with how much tension we had growing between us. It'd always been tense between us, but after Marcus's party, it was just a waiting game to see which of us gave in first. I guess it ended up being a joint effort though. It was the first time we'd actually gone through with anything without people around us forcing us into it. It didn't feel the same. It somehow felt... Realer. It was more genuine knowing we did it on our own accord, even if it was just him feeling up my chest. It might not have been insanely romantic or sexual, but it definitely wasn't friendly behavior either.

And then there was what he'd said afterward. 'Sorry, couldn't help myself'. There was no way he could pretend it was just a friendly gesture after saying something like that. He knew just as well as I did that this was new territory for us. I couldn't say I was scared or uncomfortable with it though. Excited sounded more accurate.

The way I'd backed off had absolutely nothing to do with not wanting it to happen. I wasn't sure what exactly I wanted it to lead to, but I knew whatever it was I was definitely okay with it. Except, now wasn't the time. I wanted to know what we were first and I wanted to be alone without the risk of people overhearing it. Can you even imagine how awkward that'd be? God, no. No, this is for the best. We should wait. However, I just really hope he doesn't think I stepped away because I didn't want it, because I did.

I was quick to change into my dry clothes, determined to ignore the bulge in my briefs. I was definitely not getting off with Tyler in the room over again. That was a one time thing. Instead I turned all my attention to my hair, concentrating on solely the way it looked and making sure it ended up perfect. It was a good distraction, the heat in my belly completely gone by the time I finally got my quiff to a point where I liked it. 

I took a deep breath now that I had nothing else to fill my time with, looking over at the closed door and wondering how long I'd been in here. I couldn't really avoid him any longer, especially when my only exit involves walking past him. I should just face the problem head-on. Maybe we'll talk about it, maybe we'll continue on in a comfortable ignorance of it like we did our kiss, but either way I had to do something. 

I kept my face emotionless as I could manage as I gathered up my wet clothes and tossed them into the bathtub, deciding to deal with them later as I walked over to the door. I opened it slowly, unsure of what kind of thing I'd find on the other side. I was pleasantly surprised to find Tyler cuddled up in the blankets of my bed, my laptop placed on his lap and his eyes fixed on the screen. That was considerably less awkward than what I'd imagined happening, him standing there just waiting for us to talk. 

I walked out of the doorway, just standing in the middle of the room and staring at him expectantly. Is he ignoring me? Oh god, what do I-

"Why haven't you shown my your playlists before? These are so good."

"Hey!" I shouted in protest, crossing my arms angrily that he'd looked at them without my permission. He looked up for the first time then, carefully plucking out the one earphone he had in, giving me a guilty smile.

"Sorry, couldn't help myself." I rolled my eyes at him quoting his earlier self, trying to hide the blush invading my cheeks at how easily he brought it up. The seriousness of the moment had obviously faded considering he was already teasing me about it like he did the kiss, trying to make a joke out of it, probably to make things less uncomfortable. I wasn't sure if I was grateful for it or still wanted him to take it seriously and really talk to me about it, but I decided I could decide later, glimpsing at the clock and realizing how long I'd spent on my hair.

"Tyler!" I groaned, hurrying to grab his wet clothes off the floor too. I ran back into the bathroom and tossed them into the tub with mine, rushing out to find him still comfortably curled up in the same spot. I widened my eyes, making frantic gestures at him. "Second period is starting now!" He raised a single eyebrow, looking over at the clock in utter disinterest.

"Well, what do you know, it is." I balled my hands into fists, resisting the urge to tug at my hair in frustration. He's so insolent! I knew that wouldn't help though, instead just grabbing my bag and starting toward the stairs for what felt like the fiftieth time just since waking up. I only made it to my doorway before he was speaking up in an urgent tone.

"You're forgetting your ugly sweater!" I sighed, pausing to turn on my heels and look back at him. He'd gotten to his feet and closed the laptop, standing beside the bed and shrugging his backpack over his shoulders. As soon as he had he turned and snatched a sweater off the bed, holding it up beside his. "Look, I found us matching ones." 

He sounded almost shy as he wiggled the shirt in the air as if showing it off, a blush on his cheeks. I realized it was probably from my lack of a reply, hurrying to comfort him. I sighed softly, walking back over and snatching it from his hands a little too forcefully. He looked a bit shocked so I quickly made up for it with a genuine smile, alerting him I wasn't upset, just in a rush. I tugged the sweater on with a bit of a struggle, ever-careful not to mess up my hair. I'd spent forever styling it, that would be such a waste of time.

It was only after I poked my head out through the hole in the top that I realized Tyler had been watching me, a huge smile on his lips, clearly amused by my struggle. I rolled my eyes, grabbing his hand and tugging him toward the door. He followed without fighting, until we reached the mirror just before the door. He jerked my arm until I was forced to stop with him, sighing and looking over at the mirror. My eyes widened when I saw the pair of us, surprised by how... coupley, we looked with those matching sweaters on and our fingers entwined.

"Can I take a picture?" Tyler asked, his tone almost hopeful as he started to fish his phone out of his pocket. It's not like I could say no when he already had the phone out, and I'd be lying if I said I didn't want to remember this day. Instead I simply posed next to him, smiling into the mirror. I waited for his confirmation, instead jumping when he jabbed his finger into my ribs. "Smile with your teeth."

"Fine." I sighed out, giving an over-the-top fake smile. He looked up from his phone screen to lock eyes with me in the mirror, the angry glare telling me he didn't approve of my sarcastic behavior. I wiped my face, letting it spread back into a genuine smile as I thought about just who I was standing here holding hands with. He approved of that, looking up at the mirror as well as he started to click the button to shoot.

If I'd let him we probably would have been stuck standing in front of that mirror the entire day. After about five minutes and endless poses I had to manually force him away, insisting that was more than enough selfies for one day, especially when I was wearing such a hideous outfit. We walked downstairs still hand-in-hand, me silently hoping that my parents wouldn't notice us while he blabbed on so loudly it would be impossible for them not to. He was looking through the selfies with his free hand, commenting on whether they were good or not. The only comment he made that really stood out to me was when he compared me to a goat, making me promise to never grow a beard in case the similarities grew even more. I had no problem with agreeing to that, not intending to grow one anyway.

We made it past the kitchen door unnoticed to my shock, not even pausing in our conversation as we walked right past. Yet my parents stayed silent, making me almost worry about their lack-of-meddling. It wasn't like them, normally they'd even walk us to the door if we allowed it. I was so busy worrying over it I outright ignored Tyler, earning a slap on the head as he gestured to my shoes and repeated that I should put them on before he drug me out in my socks. 

I slipped them on, deciding not to stress as Tyler opened the door for me. There was no way they'd get a chance to embarrass me now, we were practically home free. I stepped out onto the porch, turning around to reach for Tyler's hand again. My eyes went wide when I saw the mischievous smirk he had on, winking at me before turning to call over his shoulder.

"Bye Shaun! Bye Laurelle!" He called, my jaw dropping at his deliberate provoking of the parents. He looked back to me then, a smug lopsided grin on his lips as he held a hand to his ear, awaiting their response.

"Bye boys! Have fun at school! Did you take a change of pants with you just in case you need another?" I groaned, grabbing Tyler's wrist and tugging him out the door before slamming it.

He's so cute when he's embarrassed.

"No, I'm not." I spat, tightening my grip as I pulled him down the steps. We made it halfway to the car before he spoke up, his tone tentative and confused.

"You're not what?" I stopped walking, turning to face him with furrowed brows. What's he talking about? 

"I'm not-" I shut-up, my mouth snapping shut as I realized what I'd done. Oh my god, what's wrong with me? I've gone nearly ten years without a slip-up and today of all days is the one I screw up? And over something so stupid! What do I say? It's not even that incriminating, it should be easy to breeze past and cover it up. However, I found myself speechless, a lump forming in my throat when I opened my mouth to explain and lie my way out of it. All I could think about was how badly I could mess up, completely oblivous to the chances of it actually happening. I couldn't mess this up, not with Tyler.

So instead I stood there with my mouth opening and closing, looking like some sort of fish out of water, while Tyler stared at me in confusion. I seriously thought he was about to call me weird or have it click into place what had happened, however I was greeted by his familiar laugh and his hand landing on my shoulder, squeezing it.

"It's not even early and you're this much of a mess." He muttered, standing back up straight after doubling over laughing for nearly a minute. I still hadn't moved a muscle, my body insisting on freaking out despite the danger being passed.

Now that he was standing again he seemed to notice my discomfort, his hand on my shoulder moving to cup my cheek. He leaned in, sloppily pecking me on the cheek before pulling away with a huge cheerful grin. "What am I going to do with you?"

"I'm pretty open to ideas." I said it without thinking, immediately clamping a hand over my mouth in disbelief. What is with me today? However, he didn't seem to mind, just smirking before shaking his head ruefully.

"Don't tempt me." He muttered, turning and heading toward the driver's door of his car, leaving me there breathless at how much flirtier or relationship suddenly was. I didn't even think it could get any flirtier, but I guess I was wrong. 

"Troye, you have never looked gayer... I like it." Zoe beamed, wiggling her hips awkwardly. I groaned, frustratedly trying to wipe my hands off on my shirt yet again.

"Of course you do. And don't be so stereotypy, I'm sure there are loads of straight guys that love glitter." I muttered, looking down to see my entire front covered with the shiny blue flecks. Who thought it'd be a good idea to put me in the decorations group? Oh yeah, the same teacher who thought it'd be a good idea to put me in a group without Tyler when we were very clearly pinned to each other's sides the entire time we were here yesterday.

Another surge of delayed anger coursing through me, I looked longingly across the room at the group I really wanted to be in; food. Of course I didn't actually care about food that much, it had more to do with the idiot currently bouncing excitedly in his seat as he got to sample the different cupcake flavor options. Occasionally during the past hour I'd even been able to hear his excited exclamations, showing just how upset he was about being put in a group without me.

Okay, maybe that's a dumb thing to say. He can enjoy himself and not spend the entire time simply wishing I was there with him. Well, assuming he's less pathetic than me anyway.

"Oh come on, Troye, I'm sure you can last another ten minutes before it's over."

"Huh?" I blinked, turning around to face Zoe again, blushing slightly at her catching me staring.

"You're incapable of going a full sixty-seconds without looking over at Tyler. Trust me, I've been counting." I blushed even harder now, realizing she'd been noticing my stares this entire time. I sighed, turning back to my horribly-decorated snowflake banner and beginning to roll it up, all the while imagining how much more fun I'd be having if I was over in the food group. Even without Tyler the cupcakes sounded better than arts and crafts. 

I concentrated on my work for a few more minutes, secretly thinking about how much time I had left before I could leave the entire time. It's not that I wasn't enjoying Zoe's company, because I actually genuinely was, but that definitely didn't make her my first choice. She had been peppy like usual for the last hour, oddly not bringing up Tyler and I at all other than just now. Instead she'd busied herself with telling me all about Alfie and her's relationship and how they were dating but only telling close friends (I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a bit over-excited about qualifying as a close friend), telling me about what the Christmas dance committee had been like years prior, and telling me an oddly-intriguing story about her only interaction with Tyler before we became friends this year. 

Apparently she'd had the honor of watching him sloppily kiss some girl while drunk at a party once, only to literally push her off of him when she tried to tell him she wanted to take things further. She laughed about it now, explaining how it'd seemed so rude at the time but now, knowing he was likely just uncomfortable because he isn't interested in girls, it was a funny story.

I couldn't even picture Tyler kissing a girl, much less going any further with one. It was almost laughable just looking back to a couple of months ago when I had any doubt in my mind that he was gay.

"So, have you guys kissed again yet?" I made a face, looking up at Zoe with an unimpressed scowl.

"I knew it was too good to be true that you wouldn't talk about this sort of thing for the entire day." I sighed out, tossing my rolled-up banner over with the rest of them. Despite my complaining it actually was fun to make it, I was just finding ways to be grumpy about everything today, likely from Tyler deprivation or something. Sure I'd seen him this morning, but that was it. We didn't have any classes together today and he'd managed to get in trouble during one of them, so that meant spending his lunch hour in detention. It was beyond me how you could even get in trouble during spirit week, but I'd yet to hear his story and I was sure he'd surprise me with it.

"Well, have you?" I looked back over at Zoe's expectant eyes, watching her bat her eyelashes pleadingly just once before giving in and deciding to answer her. It couldn't hurt, right? If anything it'll discourage her to know we haven't kissed since.

"Not on the lips." I knew the second the words left my lips that I'd made a mistake, my wording only opening myself up for a ton more prying and teasing. I sighed as I listened to her thrilled squeal, starting toward the bathroom to wash my hands off, half-hoping she wouldn't follow.

"Oh god, Troye! Spare me the details!" She fake-gagged, making a hand gesture that looked suspiciously familiar to a completely different reason to gag afterward. Realizing she'd caught my attention she stopped, lips turning up into a smirk as she winked at me. "...Or don't."

"No! Not like that! I meant like cheek kissing!" I groaned, wishing my hands weren't covered in glue and marker so I could run them through my hair in frustration. She was the most foul creature I'd ever met, yet she looked so ridiculously innocent on the outside. I feel bad for anyone that pursues or befriends her in the future without taking the time to figure out what they're getting themselves into first.

"What kind of cheeks?" She pried, her voice barely more than a teasing whisper. I groaned even louder, turning in the doorway of the men's room to glare at her.

"Never in my life have I wanted to hit a girl more than I do right now and that's seriously saying something." I spat, giving her the finger before disappearing into the room. I closed the door behind me, heading straight for the sink and taking my time washing up. I had about three minutes left before we were free to disband from our groups and leave. Part of me wondered if I'd be able to wash my hands for that long and get away without facing Zoe again, but then I had the horrifying thought that she might try to continue or conversation then when Tyler was around. That was not allowed.

So instead I found myself dragging my feet as I walked back out, giving up on getting the glitter off and giving up on getting Zoe off my back. She was still waiting by the door, grinning at me as I emerged. I tried to walk past her, failing when she threw an arm around my moving shoulders.

"Okay, so all you've done is kiss each other's cheeks? I kiss my grandmother's cheek, Troye, that's just sad." She said dramatically, my eyes narrowing into a glare in reaction. Who was she to belittle my interaction with Tyler like that? Tyler and I's relationship was not purely platonic, even if we didn't exactly act like boyfriends, we didn't just act like friends either. Suddenly I felt inspired to convince her of this rather than cover it up like I had been in hopes of getting her to leave me alone, determination to prove her wrong fueling my mind as I spoke up.

"Well, we did some other stuff today." I said matter-of-factly, surprised with how level I managed to say it when the memory itself still had my knees feeling weak beneath me and my head spinning.

"Other stuff?" She asked tentatively, willing me to elaborate. I bit my lip as I tried to think of how to word it. Simply saying that he felt up my chest while we were both shirtless didn't sound right or hot at all. I guess I could leave something to the imagination, let her little fangirl mind wander.

"Touching I guess, but nothing below the waist." I said quietly, smirking slightly at the memory. Her eyebrows shot up, her eyes widening and then narrowing in what looked to be confusion.

"What'd he do? Give you a sexual back massage?" She asked obnoxiously loud, throwing her hands up in frustration. I shook my head, not even caring about how loud she was being, just determined to prove Tyler and I's relationship to her. 

"No, he like... Well, he-" I shut my mouth, pursing my lips as I tried to think of a way to describe it. Why was this so hard to put into words?

"This." My eyes went wide at the unexpected sound of Tyler's voice directly behind me, only actually registering what he'd said when it was too late. My understanding hit me about the same time his hands snaked around my chest from behind, pinching at my nipples roughly through the layers of clothing.

"Ah! Tyler!" I cried out, jumping back against him. He giggled in my ear, clearly pleased with the vocal reaction. I wasn't happy with it, knowing people were likely looking over at us from all around the gym. However, that didn't stop me from leaning further back against Tyler, panting slightly as he wedged his chin up on my shoulder.

"-But with less clothes, right, Troye-boy?" He whispered, pecking his lips against the lowest part of my neck exposed. Past the point of getting after him for the teasing, I just nodded, the speed increasing with each jerk of my head and the more I thought about what had happened between us this morning.

"How was the food group?" Zoe asked, surprisingly casual all of the sudden despite how eager and persistent she'd been all afternoon. Tyler gave an intuitive hum, the sound loud considering how close his mouth was to my ear in this position.

"Good aside from the fact my stomach wouldn't stop growling the entire time. Man, am I looking forward to our ending snack!" He laughed, his hands leaving their resting spot on my hips to rub together in front of both of us, displaying just how eager he was. I was about to stand up on my own weight and make fun of him for his childish behavior when the teacher called out, announcing that all of our Chinese take-out had arrived. Tyler's hand slid around to discreetly slap my ass out of Zoe's view, bounding out from behind my and toward the front of the room. "That's my cue!"

"Okay, we'll be over in a second!" Zoe called after him, her tone leaking with fake-friendliness. Uh oh, what'd he do to piss her off now? Once he was out of ear-shot she sighed loudly, bringing a hand to rub at her forehead in obvious distress.

"I think he spent too much time around straight boys as a pre-teen, it's effected him deeply." She sighed, making me laugh out loud at the random statement. I looked over at Tyler, watching him excitedly bounce around before picking up one of the many boxes strewn around the table, lifting it above his head as he walked over  to the other table with condiments on it.

"What ever do you mean?" I chuckled, shoving my hands in my pocket and starting over toward the herd of people to join them. She followed beside me, tsking quietly to herself.

"He had you breathless and blushing and abandoned you for take-out food."

"Are you sure it's not just a guy thing in general?" I countered, wondering how she could act like she knew so much about everything. Where did she get all of her gay boy knowledge anyway? The internet?

"Would you have done it to him?" I stopped walking, tilting my head to the side in thought. I wanted to say yes just to prove her wrong, but I also knew that was a total lie, instead sighing and shrugging my shoulders.

"Touche."

It wasn't long after that that I found myself walking toward Tyler's car with him in tow, stuffing the last of my take-out box into his face. By the time Zoe and I had reached him he'd already finished his food, looking up at me with those puppy-dog eyes and explaining how he didn't get any lunch in detention. To be fair, that was quite sad and it's not like I was hungry anyway, so of course I ended up giving my share to him. It was definitely worth it, watching his eyes light up and hearing that shallow unsure 'really?' like he thought I was freaking kidding about giving him my food. 

Even now he was still muttering the occasional 'Mmm, this is so good' or 'Thanks again Troye, your the best' through mouthfuls of food. It was like he'd never eaten a bite of food in his life. That said, I definitely didn't mind being showered in thanks and affection like this, instead just contently nodding along with everything he said about how great I was.

He finished it by the time we reached his car, making me curl my upper lip up in disgust as he threw the box into the backseat, reminding me once again of what Zoe had said earlier. I'm not saying she's right because it's probably stereotyping to say there's no such thing as a messy insensitive gay boy, but Tyler definitely takes the title of one if there ever was.

"Okay, so, to your house? Or to the tree lot?" He asked, slipping the key into the ignition before looking back over at me. I thought for a second before realizing the obvious decision. There was only one that totally ensured Tyler would have to come back to my house after getting the tree, which should make my choice fairly obvious.

"My house, don't waste all your gas driving me around when we can just ride with my family. Remember though, you were the one that agreed to this." I cautioned him, trying to cover up my need to spend time with him for simply thinking about gas-efficiency. It seemed to work, his expression staying serious as he gave a quick nod and started the car.

"How many times do I have to tell you that I like your family before you believe it?" He asked suddenly, surprising me after I thought the conversation was done. 

"I'll believe it when my family actually becomes likable, that's when." I said honestly, choosing to ignore his annoyed scoff as he pulled out of the parking lot, reaching for the radio as he started down the main road. I practically groaned when the radio announcer announced the non-stop Christmas song spree, bracing myself for the worst.

"These Christmas songs are obnoxious." I stated finally, lasting through a solid three songs before the fourth had me cracking. I even managed to live through Alvin and the Chipmunks, but the bubbly, female voice currently on, singing about Frosty, was simply too much for me.

"You're obnoxious, what do you have against Frosty The Snowman?" He scoffed, offended by my words yet again. I rolled my eyes, getting ready to ramble on about the subject. Trust me, I'd said stories like this to my parents practically every year of my life when I insisted they change the channel from Christmas songs. I had excuses why I didn't like them for practically every Christmas song out there.

"Everything. What kind of stupid idiot makes a story where a hat brings inanimate objects to life anyway-"

"You are so cynical! Your mother's right, why do I put up with you?" He groaned out, my mouth immediately snapping shut. I knew he didn't mean it and I knew it was meant to be a joke, yet I still found my chest feeling uncomfortably heavy the more I thought about his words. Why does he put up with me? He's so cheerful and full of energy al the time, while I'm like some sort of dead weight he hauls around. It's not really fair to him, is it? He deserves someone just as happy as he is, someone who can encourage his happy rather than drain it. 

Seconds passed while I looked out my window, forlornly watching the houses get more and more familiar as we approached my road. We were just turning onto it when he spoke up again, his tone bashful and concerned. "Hey, I didn't mean it like that."

"I know you didn't." I said honestly, my voice still coming out slightly shaky. Why's it so shaky? Oh god, I'm not really about to cry over something stupid like this, am I? I think I'd have to give up on myself for doing something stupid like that. I felt my throat tighten and clenched my eyes shut, determined not to make a further idiot of myself. I'm not going to cry, I'm not going to-

I was distracted from my mental mantra, jumping slightly when Tyler's hand came to rest on my thigh. I turned my head slowly, peering over at him nervously and taking in the way his eyes were still focused on the road, only one hand on the wheel as he started to slide the other up and down my leg. It wasn't a sexual gesture though, just a comforting one, clearly noticing my unease.

"I put up with you because you're cute, and funny, and sweet, and-" I blushed, setting my hand on top of his and squeezing, assuring him I was okay. I definitely was, my inner struggle completely forgotten after just a couple of his stupid compliments.

"Okay, I think that's enough, if you compliment me anymore today I might have to propose."

"Did I mention you have a nice smile?" My jaw dropped, looking over at him in disbelief at how obvious he was being about his flirting today. I didn't get to see his full reaction though, only the corner of his lips quirking up as his gaze remained focused on the road.

"You're too much." I muttered, blushing all over as I turned to look back out my window, suddenly enjoying the disgustingly-cheery Christmas carols in the background.

I shivered as I climbed into the backseat of my family's van, falling into the seat in the very back next to Tyler. It was pretty much a rule that people with a friend over got to have the backseat to themselves. Up until now, I hadn't been able to take advantage of it, relishing in being so far away from everyone else. Well, everyone aside from the one I wanted to be close to, the one currently curling his body around one of my arms in an attempt to warm up. 

We'd been sent out to the van fifteen minutes ago, my parents insisting they'd be right out and we could sit in the vehicle and wait. However, they didn't realize the keys weren't in the van, and we didn't realize how stupid of us it was to lock the door behind us. Momentarily locked out, we had spent the last fifteen minutes as human popsicles, listening to Tyde's phone blast dubstep as Sage complained. We probably could have gone around and knocked on windows until we got our parent's attention, but who really wanted to put that much effort into it? Not me, that was for certain.

Besides, we managed to live through the second ice age of fifteen minutes outside, now contently buckling in and getting ready for the drive. It wasn't actually that long of a drive, but I had a feeling it would feel like one with the radio blasting and my embarrassing family jammed in a small space with Tyler and I, giving us nowhere to run.

Tyler pulled out his phone next to me, silently opening up his texts with what I glimpsed to be Marcus and typing in a reply to whatever he'd sent Tyler last. I leaned my head against the top of Tyler's, surprised by how heavy my eyelids suddenly felt. Probably a side-effect of using all my energy to conserve heat out there in the harsh winter.

I jumped with a start when someone pinching me stirred me from my light slumber, slightly disoriented as I looked around the now-empty van. Tyler was still sitting next to me, looking up at me expectantly like he was waiting for me to say something.

"Um, are we there yet?" I chuckled, earning a smack upside the head and a dramatic pout.

"Yes! We've been here for like five minutes! I told them I was going to wait for you to wake up but I started to worry I'd be stuck in the van the whole time." He explained, making me blush as I realized I'd likely fallen asleep on him earlier. He didn't give me much time to be bashful though, hitting me again, on the shoulder this time. "So, um, wake up!"

"I'm already awake, doofus. Come on, if you're that excited to get out." I laughed, unbuckling my seat belt and gesturing for him to take the lead. He quickly scrambled to his feet, hunching over so he didn't hit his head off the ceiling as he started to sidestep out of the car. He started to reply as he walked, excitement still showing clear in his voice.

"I am! My mom's allergic to the sap on Fir trees or something and we've always been forced to go with artificial trees. I've always wanted to go to a tree lot!" He exclaimed, sliding the van door open and hopping out. I scowled at the cold gust of air that blew in, sighing before jumping out after him.

"Tyler, I hate to be the one to break it to you, but they aren't really all that exciting." I said flatly, turning to close the door behind us. I jumped as his hand slipped into my front pocket, pulling me back closer to him so his breath hit the back of my neck.

"Anywhere could be exciting with you next to me." I groaned at his cheesy words, grabbing his wrist and pulling his hand out of my pocket, determinedly stomping off toward the large sign stating 'enter here'. There wasn't actually a path through the trees, all of them just growing wildly, but there was a fence around the perimeter, the door inside the only way out. Well, that I knew of.

We stopped in front of the entrance, my eyes falling on the sign alerting us to be careful not to get lost. It wasn't that big of an area, but with trees this tall I could imagine it'd be quite easy to get lost.

"Did I tell you that was a stupid idea yet? We're going to have fun trying to find them in here." I said grumpily, obviously not managing to damper with his mood at all, his hand only grabbing mine and practically pulling me off my feet as he lurched forward, rushing through the gates.

"Let's go!"

"Do you see how boring it is yet?" I muttered after only a matter of a minute, glaring at every single tree we walked past. Tyler either didn't agree or didn't care to say so, instead just continuing to steer me around, zigzagging through the trees and occasionally commenting on how nice some of them were. I wasn't sure what exactly qualified a tree to be 'nice', but I decided to just take his word for it, not really caring enough to ask for an explanation.

It was about fifteen minutes into the walk, that things started to look repetitive. I bit my lip, listening to Tyler's comment on a tree that we'd surely been by at least two times before now. I was also pretty sure he'd made the exact same comment the first two times, making me seriously worry about his memory. "Tyler, we've seen that tree thirteen times."

"No, we have not. I've been keeping track of where we are with that cloud." He said matter-of-factly, pointing up at a particularly fluffy white cloud. A white cloud that was also in a completely different place than it had been or last trip around this tree.

"Clouds move." I stated blandly. He shrugged his shoulders, clearly still not ready to admit he was wrong.

"So?" I sighed, finding an old footstep a few feet in front of us, gesturing for us both to make imprints beside it. His face fell when he realized it was his own foot print, concern clouding his features for only a second before he masked it, looking up at me with another unimpressed stare.

"Ugh, can we just walk in one straight direction?" I groaned, trying to drag him ahead for a change. We made it two steps before he stubbornly dug his heels into the snow, turning and dragging me in the direction to our right.

"That's the straightest thing you've ever wanted to do." He muttered darkly, making me gasp at the grumpy tone. He simply turned to glare at me, making it clear he wasn't nearly as cheerful and sure of himself as he'd been acting. That little shit realizes he's gotten us lost and just doesn't want to own up to it.

I stepped after him quickly, crashing into him from behind on purpose, hoping a bit of playing around would cause his usual bubbly mood to return. He spun around, my eyes going wide as I started to turn. I didn't even turn fully before he was engulfing me in a bear hug so tight I had to gasp for air, squirming as he picked me up off the ground and carried me a couple steps. His legs gave out underneath us suddenly, clearly not built to carry me and trudge through the snow. We fell onto our butts, my hands flailing out for something to hold on to. Can you guess what I found? A tree.

The branch snapped off rather than helping me, a disgruntled squeak managing to escape my lips before it landed on my chest. I shoved it off, groaning at the sticky balsam it left on my palms. And everyone wonders why I 'have no Christmas cheer'.

"What's wrong babe?" Tyler giggled next to me, already rising to his feet, clearly noticing my whole ordeal. I just shook my head, sticking my hand out for him and begging with my eyes. He sighed, grabbing onto it and pulling me up, making a face when the balsam rubbed off onto his hand.

After that we continued in silence, both of us content to just focus on keeping our balance as we stomped through the thick snow. I was beginning to wonder if we'd ever even find a fence after walking in a straight line for ages, my jaw dropping when I caught sight of Christmas lights twinkling.

"Look! I told you I knew where we were going! There's the owner's house!" Tyler shouted next to me before I could even announce my observation, tightening his grip on my hand and pulling me forward. He didn't even hesitate when we reached the fence, letting go and slipping through the barbed-wire effortlessly. He looked back at me expectantly, sighing when he saw my obviously-hesitant expression.

"You're gonna be fine." I sighed, taking a deep breath before ducking through it after him. The back of my sweater caught just barely, not enough to hurt me, but enough to make me shiver uncontrollably at just how close I'd come to actually being hurt.

We ran across the person's yard and dodged all of her Christmas decorations, something in the back of my mind telling me this was not where we were supposed to go. I'd been here tons of times before but the yard didn't seem to ring a bell at all. The house seemed vaguely familiar, but not enough to be the place we'd gone every year for my entire life.

"Is this even where we're supposed to go? I think the house and place you buy the trees are two different buildings." I said honestly as we walked up to the door, his hand immediately going to use the knocker. He gave three sturdy knocks, nothing but silence greeting us. He tried again, almost desperate this time. I sighed, reaching out to grab his wrist before he could do it again. "Tyler, it's not like I can just let you have this one, it's obvious we're not getting any help here. Though if I remember right the barn where you buy the trees is right beside the house..."

"Yeah?" He said, excitement showing clear in his voice as he locked eyes with me again. He looked hopeful now, like he was happy with the idea of not looking like a total idiot who'd led us to the middle of nowhere. I simply nodded to answer him, watching his answering grin with a smile. "Okay, let's-"

"See! I told you guys!" We both froze, his sentence cut off as we turned to look where the familiar voice had come from. Standing ten feet away just on the other side of the fence was Sage, her eyes alight with mischief and cheeks flushed as she pointed at us.

"Told them what? That you found us? Because we found our own way out." Tyler quipped, sounding insanely proud of 'finding his own way out'. I watched as the rest of my family walked out of the trees, all ducking through the fence effortlessly. It made me feel a bit dumb for making a big deal over it.

"You also found your own way under the mistletoe." My mother laughed, my eyes going wide as her words sunk in. Oh no. Leave it to us. I sighed, tilting my head upward at the same time as Tyler, both of our Adam's apples bobbing as we swallowed nervously, eyeing the overhanging plant incredulously. "Or was that an accident?"

"It was a coincidence. What kind of sicko puts it right over their door anyway? Tons of people are going to get caught under this." I defended immediately, debating whether stepping out from under it would do me any good now. 

"That's the point." Sage laughed, earning a giggle from the other three family members as well. I sighed, rolling my eyes and leaning back against the door. I was subconsciously finding my way as far from Tyler as possible without outright walking away, not wanting him to feel rejected or anything. He had to understand why I didn't want to go through with it though. My family was right there, it was cheesy and cliche, it just wasn't right for our second kiss. 

"I don't know what you're expecting, but Tyler and I are not kissing just because of some stupid plant." I said stubbornly, glaring at all of them. I watched their faces drop, surprised by how easy it was to get them to agree. I guess they realized they couldn't force me into it and risk ruining things between Tyler and I, politely taking a step back despite how badly they probably wanted it to happen.

However, what I hadn't been expecting, was where Tyler stood on the matter.

"Oh, we're not?" Tyler asked, sarcastic disappointment obvious in his voice, along with the teasing that he wouldn't be using if my family were standing close enough to hear his whispers. My eyes went wide, my entire body stiffening as he took a step closer to me, crowding me against my door-frame side now. I stayed standing as formally as possible, arms clasped to my sides and face completely blank as I looked onward.

"N-No?" I said, cursing how it came out as a question. How was I supposed to say anything at all how I wanted to when he was close enough I could feel his warm breath hitting my neck, making all the hair's on the back of it stand up uncomfortably.

"Why not? Where's the fun in that?" He laughed, hand landing on my collarbone and sliding up my neck to grip my jaw. He breathed over my neck one last time before turning my head to face him, flashing me an endearing confident smile despite how close we were. How could he be so calm and collected all the time? "You really should have more Christmas spirit, Troye Sivan."

"Oh?" I inquired, quirking an eyebrow as I searched his face for any hint of sarcasm. Please tell me he isn't just playing around and planning on pulling away the second my eyes fall shut, I don't think I could handle that twice in one day.

"Mmm." He hummed in confirmation, his eyes darkening in desire as they flickered from mine down to my lips. I blushed, feeling nervous under his intense gaze for a second time today. My family probably had no idea what was going on considering he'd chosen to whisper all of his replies. Actually, maybe they knew exactly what was going on, I guess it depends if Tyler actually plans on kissing me. Do I want him to kiss me?

I watched him suck his bottom lip back into his mouth, a flurry of butterflies battering around in my stomach more insistingly than the snowflakes that had begun to fall around us. Yes, I definitely want him to kiss me.

I was on the verge of closing my eyes when his lustful expression suddenly changed to a childish one, his face turning up into a ridiculous one as he started to laugh, turning as if to walk away. He's kidding. He wouldn't seriously just leave me here after that.

He made it a single step, snickering under his breath, before something different entirely came over me and I was reaching out and grabbing his wrist, pulling him back into the doorway. He spun around to face me with confusion and disbelief on his face, furrowing his eyebrows as he searched my face, obviously looking for some kind of explanation for my out-of-character actions. I just shook my head though, wordlessly telling him not to bother. I had a much easier way to show him than words.

I reached up and gripped his jaw this time, locking eyes with him in a determined stare. He swallowed noticeably, taking his turn to blush as his eyes nervously flitted around, avoiding mine. I leaned forward slowly, deciding to use my surge of confidence while I still had it, watching his eyes instantly fall shut as I started to advance. I froze as soon as they did, taking a moment to take in how deeply he was blushing for a change, how quick the rise and fall of his chest had escalated, how it was his hands nervously balled into fists at his sides this time. It felt good knowing I had the same effect over him as he had over me, it felt good knowing he wasn't quite as confident as his teasing let on, that my proximity still made him react this much, but most of all it just felt good being in control for a change.

Noticing the way he was starting to shift uncomfortably I realized I'd probably been staring for too long, drawing in a deep breath and exhaling quietly before leaning towards him the rest of the way, my eyes fluttering shut only when I was certain I would meet his lips at a good angle. 

He let out a barely audible sigh when our lips met, still standing absolutely frigid in front of me. He definitely didn't seem to be against what was going on though, as I could feel the slight tug of tension that he was barely holding back, just underneath his skin. I moved my lips against his as lightly as I could manage, keeping my tongue locked tightly in my mouth as I wasn't entirely sure just how far was too far for a kiss initiated by a fucking plant.

However, the longer I felt his lips brush against mine the less desirable the thought of pulling back or restraining myself was, my body acting on it's own accord as I took a step closer to him. The lengths of our bodies were nearly touching as I gripped his hip with my free hand and pushed him back against the door-frame. I heard him hit it with a light thump, pressing closer to him as his body stopped moving against the solid surface. My hand flitted up from his hip then, my touch moving over his chest, light and unsure while my mouth worked, now far more demandingly against his, confident despite my lack of experience. 

I couldn't get enough of how different it felt to have him compliant under my touch, his reactions all because of me. It was almost intoxicating and the common drug metaphor came to mind. I relished in every sound and movement I managed to pull out of him, from the way his hand jumped forward to grab at my shirt when I ran my tongue along his bottom lip, to the way he moaned softly when our tongues met. 

I let my tongue push into his mouth more than I probably should have; completely entranced by the way it felt to be so close to him, to be touching in such a personal way. I let out a light moan myself at the way my clothes pulled as he tugged on them eagerly, pushing him against the doorframe a little more heavily.

Unfortunately, our kiss didn't last long after I deepened it, my eyes fluttering open as he pushed back against my chest. I obediently broke the kiss off, confused as I took a step back and stared at him.

He opened his eyes slowly, taking a shaky breath and looking up at me with an almost apologetic smile.

"Did I do something wrong?" I asked immediately, surprising myself with how unrecognizable my voice was. Not only was it deeper, but it wasn't nervous like I'd expected. It was unsure, but it wasn't nervous.

I watched his eyes flicker to the ground between us, shaking his head softly as his fingers played with the fraying hem of the sweater he was wearing. Even with his head tilted down like that I could see how red his cheeks were, surprised by how proud I felt knowing I was the cause.

"No, your family's watching." I blinked, completely dumbstruck. I'd completely forgotten about them in the heat of the moment! I sighed, annoyed I'd have to deal with them, but even more annoyed by the fact we'd been forced to cut our moment short. I looked over to see what their reactions were, knowing they were going to be the most infuriatingly excited things I'd ever saw. However, I was instead met with the sight of nothing but a bunch of footprints in the snow, eyes widening before a full-on smile found my lips.

"No, they're not." I laughed, watching Tyler look up quickly with wide eyes, a smile forming on his face too when he saw the blank space.

"Oh." I smiled even harder at his reply, remembering all the times I'd cursed myself for not being able to come up with a better response than 'oh'. I guess I know why he teases me so much now, it's intoxicating knowing you can affect another person that much.

I debated it for a second, realizing what this next move would mean if I decided to make it. There was nothing yelling at us to kiss right now, no reason that we had to do it, no excuses. All there was was the fact that we wanted to kiss and if we did, there really was no other way to interpret it. 

Yet, despite realizing what was at stake if he said no, I found myself acting on that strange new confidence and a whir of adrenaline, putting an arm against the door-frame just above his head and leaning further over him. He continued to stare at me curiously, biting his lip and looking almost like he was waiting for me to say something. So I did.

"Can I kiss you again then?" I asked quietly, my breath still coming out heavy as I tried to get it back to normal. He flickered his eyes away from mine then, though the smile replacing his nervous lip-biting told me all the reaction I needed before he even spoke up.

"If you want."

A/n: My leg is falling off call the police or like the scotch tape factory, that'd probably hold it on for a bit longer right? Did I mention it's 3am and I have to get up early tomorrow? LAST CHRISTMAS I GAVE YOU MY HEART- Sorry, so many jammy Christmas songs stuck in my head after listening to them literally all day. So many of you baboons are up waiting for this chapter to be posted and I'm just sitting here waiting for Emmy to touch up the kiss scene because I worry I've messed it up horribly. Have I ever mentioned what a literal angel Emmy is? She's pretty great. I hate when you wear headphones for a really long time and your inner ear gets itchy. My leg still hurts its a serious issue called fatass-that-hasnt-moved-at-all-in-hours-itis. WEEEEEP WOMP. What are you little bobishkas being for Halloween? Don't drink if you're underage, don't have sex unless you want to then okay but you should probably still use a condom. SOLID ADVICE. Or liquid advice. Or gas advice. Why is everyone so racist to the other types of matter? Ugh, guys have I ever told you that I talk a lot when I'm nervous? I'm so worried and excited about this chapter why do I get so anxious over dumb things. MY LEG HURTS SHOULD I STRETCH IT OUT? IMMA TRY IT. OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOO GOD IT BURNS I REGRET THAT IMMENSELY I THINK MY KNEECAP IS INSIDE OUT SOMEONE CALL THE CRIMSON CHIN.  #VoteForFreak iS THAT A SPIDER IN THE AIR OR A DUST FLAKE FUFIFFKCUFKCUFK (update: it was just dust)

       OH ALSO IMPORTANT NOTICE (idk why i put the sole important thing at the end of the a/n, don't question my methods) PEOPLE WERE CONFUSED ABOUT MY LITTLE NOTE AT THE FIRST OF LAST CHAPTER. That did not mean it was the last chapter from Troye's pov,it meant that it was the events of the chapter before that just from his pov. idk okabye

WAIT LOOK AT THIS FUCKINGGG RAD EDIT BY @KATERINASIVAN ON TWITTER OKBYE FOR REAL 100%