// (unedited)

emma's pov
song for this chapter: again by noah cyrus.
"you don't know what you got until it's gone my dear."

"this movie gets me every fucking time." hannah says extra emotionally, wiping fake tears from her cheeks.

we were watching "the death cure"
which was the last movie in the maze runner series, and newt just died. trust me on this one, i was fake crying right along with her.

we heard two doors open, one after the other meaning either someone broke in or the boys were back from dinner. great.

a knock on the door echoed through the bedroom we were in, me being the one to get out from over the covers and open it since it was locked.

it was grayson, "hey gray."

he came inside of the room with a disappointed look on his face, "what is it?"

"ethan brought a girl home."

my eyebrows furrowed, what happened to i'll wait for you forever?

grayson pulled me in for a hug, the height difference making it so that my head was pressed against his chest, arms wrapped around his waist.

hannah coughed, making it known that she was also in the room, "hello?"

we both laughed as we pulled away, "ethan can't be with another girl he's in love with you!" hannah stated, sitting up from the bed, i just shrugged. he can do whatever he wants, but i won't be here after.

-

i was the first to wake up in our room, grayson laid next to me, hannah's body was side hugging him, his arm wrapped around her and her head against his chest.

i tried to get out of the bed without waking them up.

i walked out of the room and into the living space part of the air bnb, seeing the girl from the restaurant on the couch, in nothing but a large white t shirt and short black underwear.

so it was true.

ethan came out from the balcony, walking towards her i assume. he handed her a piece of clothing which i think was her pants, she looked up to him with a frown as he pointed towards the door.

so he was trying to get her out before i saw her? maybe this isn't even about me.

i heard the door close and ethan let out a sigh, "she's cute." i said, walking into the living room making myself present.

his eyes pinned on mine, a wave of guilt splashing his face.

"emma i just thought-"

"it's okay, we aren't even together."

he nodded, patting a spot on the couch next to him as if i were a dog.

i sat next to him.

"can we talk?"

but that's when all of my emotions genuinely came in. jealousy, insecurity, sadness.

i was pushing it away and telling myself i didn't care if he was fooling around with other people, but it was hurting me subconsciously.

"yeah we can talk." i told him, my voice cracking in between every other word like an idiot.

i fake smiled, as he tried to come up with the words to say.

"is it ever gonna be not complicated with us?"

i shrugged with a sarcastic laugh, trying to play it off as a joke i guess as a defense system. while his face remained very serious.

"i do love you, it's just.. im not sure if you'll ever really feel the way i do about me."

"you just slept with two girls?"

"but-"

"i don't need an excuse, i just don't take things very seriously but i do love you i just can't see myself being completely vulnerable with you like ever."

very short update lol sorry