Chapter 70

I was treated like a monster all my life. All my life from when I was a little girl to now. Through the years of put downs, name calling, fights... it was pure hell that I was forced to live through. But even then, even through every person that called me a monster, I had never believed it; I knew I was better than those assholes. I didn't let it get to me much because I was use to it and knew I wasn't a freak like every single person in my life claimed I was. I never believed them.

It was the first time though that I seriously accepted that it had to be the truth. I was the sick monster everyone made me out to be. I wasn't... good. I just wasn't! A good person wouldn't get a guy you care about shot and paralyzed . A good person wouldn't ruin the man she loves and his life. Wouldn't make a family suffer the way I did. A good person wouldn't have to dig up your sisters body because she died based on something you did. And a good person wouldn't kill a baby and end up making everyone that is already hurt... suffer so much more. A baby that never had a chance. A baby that would have technically been my little brother or sister in a strange way. And even worse... his baby. His. The man that has suffered and hurt because of me. Now, I killed his child. No, a good person would never do those things. But a true monster would.

There was no way of expressing how I felt at that second. Because it was mixed and unreadable; impossible and like no other shocking moment before this one. I never felt something so fast change in my system, like my heart going from steady to stopped. It was the utter horror of the situation, the felling of falling, the crash of reality, and smacking into the big picture of my life. I knew... there was no going back to how things were. There was no way. All because of me and all the terrible things I made happen to the people I cared about around me.

There was no gradual acceptance with this like everything else. It just... happened. Was already a part of my reality - whether that's thanks to everything that has already been shocking to me or because the shock was just that great. All I knew was that I wouldn't be able to lay here much longer.

Staring into his glossy eyes was pure torture. Knowing that I stopped those eyes from laying upon his future child possibly... made me want to just get far away from him. I couldn't stand the pain that I felt begin to fill up my body and want to bust open. I knew that pain would soon produce tears and an agonizing sob I wouldn't be able to stop. And if I owed anything to this man right now, it was to not break into selfish tears when he is the one hurting and is the one that has a right to cry.

There was one thing that kept me laying there with him, staring at him with wide eyes. And that was the hope that she was lying or that the baby wasn't his. Otherwise, I needed to leave - and leave fast because that sob was waiting just behind my cracking voice when I finally, after so many long seconds, managed to speak.

I shook my head, so wide eyed and ready to break. This was shattering everything. One hope existed and it lied in his answer. Minutes and minutes it felt like staring at him until I choked it out. "Y-You can't be sure," I said in a quivering voice, eyebrows dipping low with my voice, stifling and cracked. "She could have been just making this up!"

Luke's eyes filled with tears again and he looked down, away from my eyes. One more reason to leave. Because despite that deep sorrow within him, I knew he probably hated me too. I killed Clare and the baby in her if all this was right. And from his words... ugh fuck! Fuck the world. Shaking his head slowly, I watched him swallow hard, lips parting and he took in a shaky breath. "S-S-She wasn't. She wasn't lying. She made me fucking feel her. S-She... she showed me!" he said, his eyes finally coming up to pierce mine in pain. But I didn't know if that originated from hate, just sadness, or worry for me. "She showed me and I-I could see it. She said she was nearly four months into the pregnancy... and... that-that was what it looked like. She looked four months an-and that-that was when," he sighed in defeat. "That's when we were still having sex. She told me wasn't on birth control when she said she was before... and she told me she put holes in the condoms that you wouldn't be able to notice," he said, looking back down, almost in shame - but also defeat and a loss a man like him wouldn't recover easily from.

Once he confirmed that, and seeing the absolute honesty in his teary eyes, I knew I couldn't stand any more of this. I just wanted to hold him and let him cry; I wanted that. I wanted to comfort him. But I was the one that killed the baby; he probably hated me! And I was the one emotionally incapable of holding him and not crying myself.

I don't know when I started, but I noticed then that my breath was incredibly loud, my chest heaving back and forth. My chest felt ready to explode with that pain and a sob and I knew there was no stopping it! My eyes in his, so much hurt.... I couldn't read him still and I couldn't continue trying. I just starting shaking my head, a little too hard as if resisting this terrible moment I was experiencing. I didn't know what to say but I tried to anyways as I started to hastily sit up.

"I... I need... a minute of...." I started with a broken voice, high and showing signs of tears. But I couldn't finish. That sick feeling in me rocked hard, back and forth. I couldn't stop myself after I sat up on the bed. I couldn't stop. In the dim room we were in, it allowed for the door to become outlined with the light from the hall on the other side. Where I needed to get to.

I got to my feet and couldn't spare the suffering man another glace without sobbing. I started to rush quickly out of the room and I didn't stop either. Didn't know where I was going, didn't know what it would bring me. I just felt tears start to stream as I walked down the hall fast, quickly... until I was running around the corner, breathing so hard now and even still! Even still it felt like I was fucking suffocating! Where was I going? Where would it even fucking matter?

I headed down the hall and towards where I knew one of the public bathrooms were that was far off from where many people would be. Secluded and away from people, which was all I asked for at the moment. I didn't want anybody around me; I didn't want to bother anyone and didn't want anyone to bother me. And though I still felt as I were suffocating when I pushed the door open, I was just happy I could let some of my pain out and cry like I needed to now.

The second the door shut, and I looked around the brightly lit and very clean bathroom, I saw the five stalls were open; nobody was here. And the moment I realized that, and that nobody occupied the long marble sink either, it came. My tears and whimpers turned instantly into streams and a heavy sob. It built up thickly in me as I gasped, my lips parted as I shook in tremors. Tremors and a pain in my stomach and core that made me bend down slightly as the air was finally released from my lungs. Gasping, a cry assisted each tight throat inhale or exhale as it built up. Higher, and higher, and with so much pain and pressure reaching my torn cries and spinning head! I stumbled over to the sink and just... leaned on it. Leaned down and rested my head on it as I cried and sobbed and allowed my tears to fall from my tired and red eyes, down my cheeks, and to my neck where my hair started to stick. It eventually led to my tired body gradually slipping down from where I was leaning against the sink to the cool white-tiled floor.

It took only a moment for me to roll to my stomach through, and press my forehead on my arm above my head on the floor. My breaths ridged and leaving heat against the cold and relieving floor, my sobs only disturbed the air. I knew I was being loud, that someone could walk in at any moment. But I couldn't fucking care! I didn't and knew this was my only option if I wanted to let my pain out - which I realized was something that crying wouldn't solve. But crying was necessary no matter what at this point.

The sobs and tears intensified with each second. With each flash of hurt. Francis was the man that always made me laugh and smile, and has always helped me. Now, after all he has done for me, I was repaying him by sending him to permanently be paralyzed! And Luke... He almost died, countless times, over me and it seriously wasn't worth it - it just wasn't! Between those two alone, their families suffered immensely. Then what happens? I end up murdering Luke's child! Oh god, no, no, no! I just took the life away of a baby that never had a chance to breathe. You destroyed a baby's life - Luke's baby! Fucking shit no! Oh no, fuck no! You took away his baby... and what would have been a large part of your life too! You killed it, struck it to the ground with Clare, and murdered it! You took away Luke's chance at fatherhood, the chance for life... You damaged everyone you fucking love! Stupid stupid stupid bitch! Oh god! WHY DID SHE HAVE TO BE PREGNANT?!

Those words and more I screamed in agony at myself in my head. Shouted them fast and loud in my head as I sobbed just as fast too. Noises erupting that sounded worse than cries and whimpers were ripped from my voice to the innocent air. Allowing my shoulders to jerk with my cries, it made my whole body shake on the floor. I just... let it out and out! With how awful I felt and disgusted in myself, I didn't see an end to this. To knowing how fucked up I am. To know that no matter what, for all that has happened, those that I hurt won't forgive me for it. That specifically meant Luke; he had more reason to hate me than anyone else. That was a whole different heartache all together that sent rough tremors over me.

I was sobbing for I don't know how long. Like a pathetic mess - but a mess I needed to be as my thoughts scrambled over everything. So much so that I didn't even notice or hear the sound of the bathroom door opening. It wasn't until I heard steps echoing in the air that I knew someone was in here with me. But before I could pull myself together enough to sit up, the person that walked in was already at my level.

I turned over, my hands propping me up on the tile as I took in his kneeling form. There were tears that were running freely down from his sweet emerald eyes. I took in his dipped eyebrows and him biting his bottom lip that was slowly getting in the way of his tears. The sight lasted for but a moment. He knelt down on the tile floor beside me and leaned closer to me. Luke wrapped his arm around me, hooking around my back and sliding me closer to his body.

This sweet, sweet, sad man... Always there. But right now... I just couldn't believe it. Just as he was about to pull me into an embrace, I stopped him with my words, a hand that I rested on his chest. "What are you doing?" I asked in a groggy voice, letting my vision clear from the tears. Watching him, there was a stunned hurt and a painful sadness; there was also a desperate need in his eyes at the same time. I shook my head violently. The whole point of coming here was to get away from him. To not burden him with my tears when he deserved to cry. To not burden him with my presence when I deserved his hate. "Don't you hate me?"

He seemed appalled and shocked to hear I would say that as his eyes grew. I couldn't believe it but another tear cascaded down from his eyes at my words. Now... all I saw was that desperation in him. "Oh my god no!" he belted out in a needy and begging voice - as if I was crazy for saying that. He slowly shook his head and his strong arm around mine pushed me closer to his body, his other moving to my thighs as he pressed our bodies together. "Oh god no.... No sweetheart. I could never hate you! God no." His words made my trembling heart jump. I felt his arm pull me closer until he moved down to sit on the floor as I was, at my level. As he did, he wrapped me in a tight hug. A loving one with shaking arms, containing my blubbering sobs against him. I couldn't stop myself from wrapping my arms up and around his neck in the process.

I couldn't help it; I buried my head into his shoulder and cried. And as I did, I knew I shouldn't be doing this. "I-I shouldn't be crying.... You should be the one needing comfort, not me!" I said, trying to sit back more from his tight embrace. But I didn't get far besides being able to stare into his jade eyes, pink filtering in. Breathing hard, I looked down in shame and bit my lip.

"You are just as hurt! You are just as hurt, baby," he whispered to me softly as he pulled me back against him, hugging me tightly to his strong and warm body. The home I would always love. The thing was... I just didn't get it! How was he still okay with me? How did he love me? How didn't he hate me?

I didn't know. I just knew that he was here, even if I didn't want him to be for his own sake - and even if I didn't deserve a man like him to hold me. I felt actually quite selfish, as I cried. That's why I didn't wait any longer to belt out what I needed to say, and what wouldn't change anything. "I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry Luke!" I said through a rough voice and more tears. I felt him start to rock me back and forth in his arms, his hands on my back rubbing softly... and I still just didn't understand it. "I-I'm so fucking sorry!"

"You didn't mean it. You didn't know," he said, his voice breaking again as I pressed against his neck and shoulder. I felt the dampness from his tears brush my soft skin. At least he wasn't holding it in either. That's what I didn't want. "You had no clue," he sighed.

I shook my head and forced myself back again, needing to see his eyes. Because I really just didn't understand. Taking a shaky breath, I licked my lips and tried to keep my voice as level as possible. "It doesn't matter. It still happened. And now... now your baby is dead. Because of me... I did this to you. I did all of this shit to you, to Francis, to your family! I did it all," I said, tears falling but I bit down hard on my lip to stop my loud crying and to take in his pained expression.

"You don't think it's frustrating? Knowing it would have lived if we arrested her?" he said quickly, searching my eyes. "It fucking hurts. But you... you had no choice. She was going to kill me, kill Francis, and as you were fighting her, there was no restraining her. You had to shoot her," he said to me in a swift voice, trying to get me to understand so I wouldn't have to suffer.

Sighing and trying to get my tears, cries, and breath under control, I watched him as he raised his hands from my back and brushed my hair back and away from my damp cheeks, moving my tears away with them. I shook my head at him. "It still was me that did it," I said, voice hurting even worse with the thickness of my sorrow there. "I still did it. If it weren't for me, Francis wouldn't have been shot. If it weren't for me, I wouldn't have killed the baby..." I said, dipping my head to cover my broken face. And as I dipped my head, his hands just stroked my hair continuously.

"Albany, if it weren't for you... I would be dead," he whispered his words as I felt him pet my hair more. "I would be dead and Francis would be dead. And Clare said she would have killed the baby anyway," he said in a thick voice of his own, so close and welcoming; so upset at the same time. "Despite all this being about you... you did the best you could have."

Swallowing, I took in his words despite my still heaving stomach body. Taking a hard breath, I tilted my head back up and looked into his eyes as he spoke the words straight from his heart. "You did everything you could have. And it's because of you I'm here with you now. With the love of my life. Because you saved me tonight. I could never hate you - never. What happened happened and... I am very sad. But it's because of Clare, the situation, and how things turned out. I don't blame you; I know you will carry this guilt for a very long time. There is nothing I can say to stop that fully. But you need to know I'm always here for you, we will get through everything, and I will love you as much as I always have!" he said, in a sweet and goading voice. What was nice wasn't that he was just saying it to calm me down and make me feel better; because he just did admit to me how upset he was and it was clear with his still fresh tears. So I knew he was telling the truth.

I swallowed hard and tried to stop crying. But it was too hard. And at that point... all Luke did was actually tell me to keep crying. He held me in a comforting hug there on the bathroom floor, holding me and just letting me cry. And like I said, what made this not as selfish for me was the fact that he was letting it out with me in a way this whole time - with those fresh tears. It was probably the best thing for our heavy hearts and all we have been through leading up to this. From the men we shot, to me being in a mental hospital. From his guilt in the relationship and mine, to the overwhelming and upsetting truth we discovered. From all the attacks and all the heartache in knowing we were lucky. And we cried knowing what happened tonight would always stay with us too.... The ache of uncovering Emily's body, the pain, the trauma of killing Clare - trauma of knowing an unborn baby died with her. And one of most disturbing parts were that we weren't even finished with this bullshit. This Reid guy is still after me and we needed to stay safe.

We just let it out, no matter how pathetic that sounds if you assholes that choose to judge. It needed to happen. With me crying softly and his tears coming silently. The pleasure came in neither of us trying to stop it as we sat there for a long while.

It was a miracle that we actually managed to get up and head to bed though; all our strength was shot so we were lucky we managed getting to our feet. It was too much for the human body in multiple ways to still be up, after all. So we happily started to make our way back down the bright and empty hall of the hospital. We were still very upset though and would be for a while I knew but we would just continue to deal with it.

"What are we doing tomorrow?" I asked him as I walked beside him down the hall. At this point, I sucked it up and knew I got out what I could of my pain; so did Luke. We would hurt for a long time coming but we wouldn't have common episodes over it.

"Well... I am going to assume Francis still won't be up. Mom can come like she wants. And we... we are going to make you free," he said with a loving smile. "It's finally going to happen. I will turn over the evidence to the authorities that I know will follow through and have the sheriff arrested. Then... everybody will know the truth," he said as we reached Francis's door and went inside.

"No school right? I'm suspended anyway," I asked him as we walked towards the bed, running a hand through my hair as I got up on the hospital bed. So soft and welcoming... I needed sleep so badly with my head still spinning with what I just discovered. It would take a very long time to let it go.

He shook his head, getting under the covers with me. And though I was still quite cautious with touching him affectionately and scared he needed space, the minute I was under the covers, Luke wrapped an arm around me and pulled me closer to him. It made me press my side and stomach against his sore body. With him on his back, straining his eyes to mine as he tilted his head, he pursed his lips. "No." A moment later, he offered a small smile. "After this, you will be able to get into any school you want without a worry and all this harassment won't be a complete strain. Either way though, I know for a fact that that suspicion won't last. You can go back the day after tomorrow, which is Friday, even though the school was against it. I'll make it happen," he nodded to me and smiled, knowing I wouldn't mind going back. Since he understood distraction was good and people wouldn't harass me as much.

I nodded, wrapping an arm delicately up and around him, careful of his cuts and aware still of the one patched up on the side of his head. Sighing deeply, so exhausted and both in need of a shower, we didn't even want to bother getting clean; we were so tired. And at the reminded of a shower, it made me speak. "Where will we stay? Where will we go?" I asked him, biting my lip and realizing... this would hurt more than I thought. And he did too. Because not only did we have no home permanently, we were still in need to hide. That strange man wants me and he proved capable that he was serious. He has men willing to get that job done as we have seen.

Watching him carefully, I felt his body tense and saw the tightening of his jaw. This was something that really shook him up. And it was because it hurt him knowing we didn't know how this would stop. We didn't know how to continue on and stay safe. "We will go back to my parents house.... And... and we will find a way to fix this. Maybe through the sheriff," he said in a scared breath, knowing how unlikely that was; the sheriff's only connection was to Clare and no more probably. He wouldn't know where this Reid guy was or how to stop him. That's what we had to do too. We couldn't sit around anymore. We would have to find him and the hard part was... we didn't know where to look.

Both of us clearly on edge about the whole thing, he pulled me up more against his body as his eyes reached mine. "We will get him," he told me in a convincing voice, but one still full of sadness and worry about the situation. Either way, worrying wouldn't help much right now. We needed sleep. And just as I felt myself relaxed and near sleep, I couldn't without kissing him. Of course, still scared and on edge about his feelings, I reached up and delicately pressed my lips against his cheek. Kissing his smooth skin, I could feel our own clouds of tiredness and sadness seem to come together.

As I pulled my lips away from his cheek, ready to go under and sleep, I felt his arm that wrapped around me move up my back. Cupping my neck through my hair, I found his eyes just as he pulled me back up and close to his face. Such a beautiful and sweet man.... Just as delicately as I kissed his cheek, he leaned down and pressed his lips down and onto mine. The moment he did that, I instinctively pressed mine up to his... kissing him back instantly in want. His scent welcomed me home to his arms as I kissed and breathed him in. So nice and soft after such a day.... It was what I needed to slowly let myself drown against him in warmth and allowed myself to fall asleep very soon after.

***

I walked through the halls feeling quite smug..

I had every right to have that feeling come over me too. Had every right to ignore everyone, ignore pleas, and ignore any sign of sympathy. Even some of the cops offered up knowing and silent glances of sympathy that I wasn't sure how to take. And yes, the cops were still following me around school for safety. I mean, for all I knew, Reid was still out in the woods looking for me; I knew he was persistent to find me. So that's why I still had a number of cops following me around to my classes, even if that didn't include Luke because he was so busy. Luckily though (note the sarcasm) I was walking through the halls with Ramper at my side. But unlike his usual stupid and insulting self, today he was very quiet, which in shame, I was happy about it. All the cops standing around as my 'guards' were quiet. That went for most people though. Most everybody was quiet and bathed in their own shame and guilt - and seeing it made me very happy, I will not lie.

All this... made it very clear how quickly news spread. Before this, when I was on the news, about half the kids in school the next day knew about me on the news and would abuse me based on whatever it was about. But when this happened... it was a very surreal moment. But I will start from the beginning when our day began yesterday morning....

It started with us returning to the sight where all this destruction in my life occurred.

We returned to the house of debris from the attack with several officers with us. And the house now filled with bodies. We were happy we didn't have to go in until after the cops cleaned up the bodies. But would it really have mattered? Two were on the stairs and one was on the living room floor, all having produced a pool of blood at the time of their deaths - things burned into my head. I know it did save us from any more disturbing images in our heads of what they looked like a day later though. Not to mention, I knew that if Luke, or maybe even I, looked at Clare... our hearts would break open again. In knowing she held the dead baby that would have been Luke's son or daughter. Which was officially confirmed hours later actually when they took the bodies away and the autopsy began. That she was pregnant and it was Luke's; it was another hit to our hearts that we were forced to push aside. After all, there was one more body that was the most crucial of handing over to the police, the police we knew we could trust since we told them what was going on.

As the cleaning up of the house was finally authorized by Luke, the now legal owner of the house, people came in and began to clean up all the glass, dirt, bullets, and blood. But that wasn't our job today and the main reason we returned to this house of hell. We returned to get Emily's body and as we did, we were able to take Mike's car we drove here in when we came to dig my sister up. And now, I had my ring back of my finger that I set in the car as we had been digging. But more importantly, I had my sister's body. Which was the final piece we needed as we were turning it over today, along with everything else we found....

So after we uncovered her fragile remains and the hard trash bag that held the bones together, it was finally time. And time to uncover the truth to the world that ignored it all my life.

It was a planned and timed event as Luke spread the news quietly to the few and capable authorities that he knew he could trust - and those that he needed as reinforcement of the truth. He also told those that had the power to authorize our information was correct. So when that happened and we were at the station, they moved in and they arrested the sheriff. Right in his own office. It took a number of officers to do it too. He was spitting and heaving a fit, disregarding every single thing that he knew he couldn't fight. Denport yelled how this was not justified by anything relevant - even with the evidence that Luke shoved in his face. He was promptly arrested and escorted into another room I was not allowed in.

So... you can bet that made huge news too that night- especially because he was the damn sheriff. With that and the truth released about my true state, my sanity, and my mother behind it all... it only gained more potential when the next news story was that the sheriff was involved. It was all this... that blew up the news and spread all over.

However, that news wasn't aired until much later. At that point, we had other things we needed to focus on - and we did. There was no questioning allowed for the sheriff yet. But when the questioning would happen, Luke wanted to be the one to do it; it was obvious he had every right to be the one to question the man. That had to wait (until today actually). So because there was no more we had to do besides a few hours work of confirmations, which dragged. But after all was settled, which took half the day to do with the police, we finally were able to leave. And with Jack too, who was in the station this whole time. My poor poor puppy. In these gloomy two days, I was more than excited to hold my little friend to me and hug him. Even if it was short lived....

We dropped Jack off at the house we would be staying for who knows how much longer. Then, escorted by the police, we went back to the hospital. We needed to spend time with Jan and an unconscious Francis....

Yes... Francis. It was so hard to believe that it was only two days ago that he was shot and wound up in the hospital. Unfortunately, as we checked in with him, Jan was always there to deliver the news we could see with our own eyes anyways. That Francis wasn't up yet. He was still out and it was because the drugs he was given were that strong. Jan was still just as shook up it seemed and I knew there was no changing that unless her son wakes up. The doctor assured her it would be soon, but as far as we knew now, into the next day (today), Francis still wasn't up. Jan could only accept that. At least we found out that Mike finally got himself a flight. He was flying in tomorrow morning and I knew both he and Jan were incredibly anxious. I just wished we could have spent all our time at the hospital to comfort Jan as she waited for Francis to wake and for Mike to come.

We spent the rest of what remained of our day there with Jan. Just holding her hand and telling her Francis was fine. Reassuring her through a few laughs even over the silly man himself and the one I came to love in my own way. That's all we did; talk and be there for Jan. And that meant not telling her yet the truth....

We wanted to wait to tell her about Clare and my sanity. About Emily and all that's been going on. Luke and I knew though that today, with her already shook up enough, wasn't the best time to tell her. She would be here the whole time anyway and wasn't interesting in TV, meaning the news. She just held Francis's hand and talked to Mike.... Who we unfortunately were forced to call up and tell later, just before the news came on.

That night was one I won't forget. Luke told his father everything over the phone and it was tough to hear Luke trying to calm his father down. Who I knew was shocked to hear about his daughter in law being the devil. Shocked that I was technically sane, that everything I have ever claimed was true, and that it ended with Clare dead. It was strange to hear him talk to his dad on the phone as we sat there on the couch that night. Petting Jack and knowing for now, all was okay. All was fine and nothing terrible was happening. It was a hectic day. And it ended when the news finally came on and my world changed as Mike wasn't the only person that would become utterly shocked by what he discovered....

It was a lot for one day. We got Emily's body, turned over the evidence, had the house worked on, had the sheriff arrested, spent time with Jan and Francis who was still out, and we told Mike the truth. But none of that would be as big of any impact as that news was on my life. It was very obvious what news like that could do to somebody's life....

That brings me to today ladies and gentlemen. Today... when I woke and knew going to school would maybe be as surreal as yesterday. And as I walked down the hall at this second, heading to my second hour class, I was already convinced this was one of the strangest things that I have experienced before.

Many were quiet and kept there head down in shame. But some were very open and willing to apologize for all they did to me. Some of those that would do that, I would nod to in acknowledgement. But that would be all if I found they didn't harass me too bad. But most that came up and said they were sorry were ignored and I would continue on; because each person that did, I remembered vividly as the boy or girl that did something very specific to me. That would be the case for Mrs. Dugan if she ever decided to grow the balls to say she was sorry. Ramper didn't yet; he said nothing to me yet.

Heading down the hall, eyes passing by and even staying on me, I noticed that one girl came up to me as I was walking in the opposite direction as her. And as strange as it was, she blocked me and softly said, "Wait, please stop," she said in a soft and quiet voice, and though many wanted me to, I wanted to know the story she had for me. I knew this girl well enough to know she was emotional. But she was emotional when she felt bad and she was nasty when it came to kids that were 'different' like me. So yes... I knew who this girl was. She was in my English class with me and just recently, started telling her friends about me being nuts and telling some of the boys I was a needy slut.

Her long brown hair pulled back behind her, her soft matching brown eyes met mine. The noise around us stopped and everyone seemed to watch as Ramper stopped with me. Staring at the girl, noticing her looking quite uncomfortable... I had no sympathy for her.

"What?" I asked, wanting to get to Dugan's room; I just wanted to see her face. She knew she was wrong; and she was one of the more nasty people that put me down. Looking at this girl, my eyebrows dipping, I saw she bit her bottom lip and looked down in shame and hurt. Poor fucking baby.

"I... I wanted to say I am so sorry! I wanted... to tell you I didn't mean all those things I said about you. I just figured all those stories were true and I had no clue that everything was a lie," she said, her light voice breaking and I had to hide my smile. Instead I offered her a fake and 'understanding' look. I was just so annoyed with these babies.... The only reason they were apologizing was because they felt bad that they were wrong. They didn't want to carry guilt so they wanted me to accept there apology. It's time some of these annoying teenage narrow-minded losers felt something besides their heads up their asses.

"Oh.... Really?" I asked in a soft, almost caring voice. Ha.

"Yes," she said, seemingly relieved that I appeared ready to accept her apology. I smirked to her and and shook my head at her.

"Then get the fuck out of my face and go suck your brother's dick" I said to her tightly - but I was at least still smiling at her! ...Even if it was more of a glaring mean smirk. But I didn't feel any sympathy as I moved past her and continued down the hall, rolling my eyes. Because though at the same time I was loving everyone feeling sorry and feeling the guilt they deserved, it was annoying to have them come up to me at the same time.

Walking along, and nearing the science wing of the school, I could feel Ramper at my side tease even more. The strange part was that... he seemed tense this whole day. But for the past half hour, it was really obvious and getting to him. When I would look up to him, he wouldn't even look at me; as if in shame, as if finding it hard to even approach the idea that all he said about me, to me, was very wrong and he never had the right. Hell, he never did in the first place! But it was only now just hitting him.

"Um, Albany?" I heard Ramper say from along side of me. I didn't look up at him as I continued with the cop down the hall, kid's eyes still on me and in worry. Sympathy. Guilt. I wanted to flip them all off but I already did that with a another group of kids before school even started.

"What?" I asked, finally glancing up to him. Ramper's eyes meeting mine for a moment, they looked quite conflicted.

"Don't you think you should accept their apologies?"

"Why?" I asked instantly, narrowing my eyes up at him. "None of them deserve it." I slowed my pace down since we were nearing the door of the class. And I didn't want to talk to him about this in there; I wanted to focus on Dugan the whole time and make her feel as guilty as possible. "None of them do. I have been put down and beaten all my life by my mother; to not even have a break at school because kids are stupid is not fair. And I honestly don't forgive any of them."

At this point, we both came to a stop - with Ramper softly putting a hand on my arm and pulling me to a stop with him in the middle of the hall. With my feet coming to a slow stop, I groaned and looked up to him. "But... what if they didn't know any better? W-What if they sincerely thought you were crazy?" he asked me, in a more desperate voice. It made me focus a little more closely on him.

"That's not my problem," I said, my eyebrows dipping as I watched him. "Nobody questioned a rumor. Nobody questioned anything. They just believed. Nobody listened to me. Why should I listen to them now?"

"Because I am so.... sorry," he said, leaning down slightly and looking deeper into my eyes. And surprisingly, it actually hit a nerve with me. I didn't feel that understanding with anyone else today but I was with him. And it was quite strange to say the least. But still... it wasn't enough for me. No matter how much he wanted it to be I could see.

I shook my head and raised my eyebrows. "I don't forgive you," I said in a soft voice. "But thank you for saying that I guess," I muttered and I saw at least some relief in his eyes; it was more I wanted to offer and no more to a man that has called me stupid and has picked little fights with me. His gentle touch left me slowly as I saw... saw him sigh and he gave me a slow nod. One that told me it was enough for now and that it was all he could ask for. And it really was. There was not a forgiving bone in my body today when it came to this shit.

Though he kept looking at me with sorrow filled eyes, I gestured for him to continue following me. "Come on," I said, a smile slowly coming to my face, excited to see me oh so favorite teacher! "I need to see the look on Mrs. Dugan's stupid face when I go in there," I said to Ramper, glancing ahead at where her door was down the hallway a little more. With kids already in class by now, we started walking again with a few kids still rushing to get to class. Only... we never made it to the room.

Throughout the whole day, like usual from now, there have been the police that have stuck back a bit and watched from afar in protection. They had walked behind me and even a few in front of me; they were actually not too noticeable anymore with how they too kept their heads down in slight shame, but still very alert. After all, they along with Ramper weren't the type that had much faith in me either. So they were feeling a little guilty still. But not enough to keep from talking with me if they needed to...

"Miss. Higgins," I heard a low voice come from where Ramper and I had started walking again. Only, we were forced to stop again from the call of my name. Sighing, I turned around and saw a few yards back, one of the officers walking closer to me. The dark haired man with a professional stance neared me. With almost everybody already in class, he spoke to me from where he was still a few yards back. "Higgins, there is someone here for you. I don't know who it is," he said as he got to me and looked down to me with curious and slightly sympathetic eyes. "But it must be Prenta or someone of great authority. The other officers wouldn't have authorized anyone that causes us suspicion - which is mostly everybody at this point."

Couldn't I just have a regular day? Well... I guess it wasn't a regular day to begin with since people weren't insulting me left and right. Either way, it made me raise an eyebrow and look at him in suspicion. I really didn't feel like trusting anyone lately. Including this cop. I knew Luke trusted him, and all these other cops here today, but I was paranoid at this point. As strange as it sounds, besides Luke, the next person that was a cop I could maybe trust was Ramper.

I said the first thing that came to my head, and possible way of getting out of it. "I need to go see my preacher-rider of a teacher. I'm routing for her to break down crying so if you don't mind..." I say, taking a few steps back and down towards Dugan's door; you guys have no idea the pleasure I wanted to get out of seeing her.

The officer gave me a sad smile. "I'm sorry but... apparently it's very important," he said to me, making me sigh and stop. I didn't want this to be anybody besides Luke. But I had a good guess it wasn't him. He would be busy all day sorting out my paperwork again and even more, he would be interrogating the sheriff for a very long time. So I was not interested in meeting whoever wanted to see me. But I mean... it's not like I'm going in empty handed.

"Fine. But you and Ramper need to come with me," I said, pursing my lips in slight worry. Who would be here for me? Maybe reporters? I mean, everything just came out about me so that is a possibility maybe.

He nodded to me, as if that was already set. "Of course we will," he said to me in truth. And not a few minutes later, we were walking down the hall and towards the front office. Ramper instructed the others to stay in Dugan's room for when I get back. After all, it was assumed that this should only take a minute. Little did I know that it wouldn't. Little did I know... I wouldn't be facing the bitch face teacher like I was looking forward too.

The moment the policeman opened the office door for me and Ramper, we stepped in and looked to the secretary upon not seeing anybody else here for me. The three of us actually were somewhat confused. Until the hallway that led back to some offices from this main office occupied a few footsteps. Raising an eyebrow, I watched as a man and a woman came into view from some office in the back. And despite being totally confused and cautious at the same time, I didn't let that stop me from taking the two in instantly that came to eventually face me.

I took the man in first. He was actually very thin and of fair height. He stood facing me with a professional stance like you see cops do. But the way he did it was very casual and comfortable; he himself looked like a calm guy. With not much of an expression besides being somewhat bored even as he looked me over with soft blue eyes, his hair greying with only signs of brown left. He had a thin mustache and looked to be in his late 50s. He looked in great shape though and seemed very... focused if that makes sense. As did the woman he was standing next to. She looked significantly younger but appeared just as professional and casual. Her brown and straight long hair was pulled back behind her tightly with not a strand loose in a pony tail. She actually looked a bit more interested in me Both of them seemed very secretive. And with great reason from what I saw them both wearing. It was the first thing I noticed about them both.

"Hello, Albany. My name is Agent Ryder, FBI" the man said with a low voice, nodding to me as he gestured to himself. Then he nodded over to the woman standing next to him as his eyes stayed resting on me. "And this is Agent Moore - also FBI; we are here on a very crucial matter at hand."