You know the moment you are in between being awake and asleep? I think of it as a bridge. lets say you are in the middle of this bridge on the verge of crossing over to the other side where there are dark forests and woods with all different types of organisms living it. The woods being your mind and the organisms being the dreams your mind will create as you fall asleep. you then have a choice to continue on into the forest, or you could go back into the clearing where you know you are safe and sound in the state of being awake, rather than falling asleep. I think that is why some people find it hard to sleep at night. They are too afraid to see what the woods of their mind has built up inside to show in their dreams..

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Chapter 1

     I lean on the glass window of my father's station wagon, looking out and into the wilderness. My little brother Mike was sitting next me in his car seat fast asleep. I smile as I look at his sleepy face. He was only four, so I could see why he wouldn't be up this late. I switch my gaze to the clock on the dash board that read "11:48". My mother was also asleep, but in the passenger seat.

    My father, whom was driving, looked at me through the windshield mirror. "Serena, you should get some sleep." I shrugged. "I'm a night owl. And plus, shouldn't you be keeping your eyes and attention on the road?" I joke around with him and he laughs. "Alright, alright. You win." He looks back at me again. "I just want to get back home, you know?" "I do dad, believe me." We were on our way home from seeing family in Salt Lake City, Utah. It's kind of a long drive from our home in Denver, Colorado, so my parents were getting antsy to head back.

    My mother works as a certified Nurse at a local hospital in our town, while my father works from home. I dont exactly know what he does however, he told me that he works for some company that makes the blueprints for buildings and such. I have no idea what those people are called, but I guess that is what my dad does for a living. I never actually really see him during the day. he's always in his office (just my parents bedroom) on his computer, looking at plans and such. It kinda weird and very anti-social now that i think about it.

    I decided that it would be best if I put my earphones in and listen to some music. Music is my stress reliever. I don't really know how to explain it. It's just so weird how one song can either make you want to sing and dance, or stay in bed and just think about the world around you. Basically it all depends on your mood. When you are upset or sad, you understand the meaning behind the lyrics, and when you are happy, you enjoy the way the music flows to the rhythm of the colorful swirl of the beat. I see it as if music is an escape. You can escape all aspects of reality just by listening closely to the beautiful yet very meaningful lyrics in which tell much more than just a story. Understanding the true beauty in life by understanding the story behind the lyrics, is what I call my escape.

    I put in my earphones and scroll through the songs on my phone. After about 5 minutes trying to find a song, I decide to listen to "This is Gospel" by Panic! at the Disco (A.K.A. my favorite song). I look up at the stars as they fill up the night sky. The moon was at its fullest and brightest. "its so beautiful" I thought as I started to get sleepy. My eyelids start getting heavier and heavier as they slowly came to a close. I was just on the verge of sleep when suddenly I heard it. I heard a scream, and when I say scream, I mean bloody murder scream. It had to have been from my mother. I jolt forward from my seat, yanking my earbuds from my ears. I look forward and I see lights. I couldn't tell where they were coming from at first. The car collided with the lights directly in front of us and The last thing I remember seeing was me crossing the bridge and into the darkness of the woods, not knowing what was waiting for me inside.

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      I wake up in a hospital bed. I feel physically fine, other than the gash on the left side of my face. I reach up to feel the bandage. "Dang" I say softly to myself as the pain rushes through my nerves.

"oh good, you're awake." Says a lady with dark brown hair and blue eyes. She was reading a home and goods magazine so I couldn't really get a good look at her face. But from what I could see, she was probably in her late 20's. I look at her, confused. "um...who are you exactly?" I asked as I slowly sit up on the bed. She looks up from her magazine and smiles. "I'm your aunt, Rachel. I'm sure you have heard a lot about me." My jaw pretty much drops to the floor as I give the most confused look probably ever possible. "I don't have an aunt Rachel... or an aunt at all." My voice is shaking. I start to get worried and almost do a panic! at the Hospital. She shoots me a look of confusion as well, and maybe even a little bit of sadness.

She then takes out a photo of her and my mother when they were in high school. "This was your mom and I back when she was a Junior and I was a Freshman." I knew for a fact that was my mother beside Rachel because during Christmas of last year, my grandfather gave my mom a huge photo album (and when I say huge, I mean huge!) of her when she was in high school. She looks exactly the same in this picture as she did in all the others. But the ones my mother showed me didn't have a "Rachel" in them.

I look up at her with wide eyes as reality starts to sink in. My palms become sweaty and I feel my heart suddenly beat out of my chest. "Where is my mother?" I ask in desperation, my voice cracking harshly. As I asked, a nurse came in and looked at Rachel as if to say something, but didn't know how to form the words she needed to use so she just stood there. she stood there. staring back and forth between me, rachel, and then back at me once again. We sat in silence for what felt like hours but was only a few seconds. "Where is my mom!" I shout at the nurse, tears starting to form from my eyes and slowly stream down my tired face. "Im sorry but they..." what? what does she mean they? this makes no sense. my head is pounding at this point and I cut her off. "what do you mean they? They as in all of them? My whole family? Mother, father, and baby Mikey?" I yell at the nurse as I feel my heart being ripped out of my chest and shattered on the hard cold floor into a million pieces. The nurse looks up at me with tears filling up in her eyes "Im sorry for your loss" she says and looks at her feet. I think my mother might have worked with her but I didnt know for sure. "Don't. Don't say loss. They are still with me and forever will be with me. I didn't lose my family and I will never lose my family." As soon as those words come out of my mouth, I realize that they are actually gone. No longer here with me. No more of moms Sunday morning pancakes with strawberries and her homemade maple syrup. No more of dads jokes when he's driving, no more of mickeys sleepy little face at 9 at night. No more of anything.

It feels like I have just been shot in the chest a million times. I don't know what to think. What do I do? All of the memories and thoughts run through my head as I shove my face in my pillow full of tears. I couldn't help but feel as if a giant elephant was crushing my rib cage. It hurts to breath and the air was being sucked out of me as the tears began to multiply. All I could think was that everyone I love and cared about... were really gone. I have nobody left.