Confusion and sadness wracked my body as I spun on my heel and stalked away down the hall. How could he expect me to live my life, happy, with him not in it? How could he ask me to forget about him and turn the other cheek if he got in harms way? How could he ask the impossible of me!

I slammed my fist into the stone wall next to an arched window. I immediately grabbed my now throbbing hand, cursing myself for my sudden act of stupidity. As I rubbed at my hand, I caught movement out of the corner of my eye. I squinted out the window, trying to make sense of what it was, and realized from the pale moonlight, it was the fair head of Erik, walking along the beach.

I made my way through the castle, down the stairs and to the castle gates. I revealed my identity to the guards and my reason for wanting to leave and they let me pass without a problem, as my name was quite familiar with the people here. I moved quickly in the direction of the beach until it came into view and I didn't slow down until I spotted him and was finally beside him. He was sitting on the sand, his hair tousled and wild from the wind and maybe, though there was no way to be sure, from fitful sleep. His shirt was open, baring his golden, muscled chest to the cool wind from the sea. I almost yelled out in shock as the waves rolled in, soaking a vast majority of his lower half and spraying his face with sea water. He continued to sit there, staring out at the darkened, curling sea, unfazed and worryingly calm as the water from his hair dripped slowly down his face.

"Erik?" I leaned down and put a gentle hand on his shoulder, not wanting to startle him. "What are you doing so close to the water?"

"Alyce," he said it plainly, bluntly, "I... I don't know. Soothing, I guess."

"Come and join me." I sat down a little ways behind him and patted the sand beside me. He eyed me from over his shoulder, deciding. He stood up and joined me right as the water washed around his ankles again. Sand stuck to his clothes, which were matted to his body. I quickly gazed elsewhere, as the look of his thin, white shirt stuck to his chest rose feelings in me I didn't want to show.

"Why are you here?" Erik inquired quietly.

"Same reason as you, I was awake." I said, trying to get a smile, but the effort was futile. "I saw you out here and I wanted to talk to you, especially after yesterday."

"I don't know what you mean for us to say."

"Come on, Erik. You've been avoiding me all day. Something has been bothering you. Ever since Gil got here..."

"There's nothing wrong. I just have a lot of work to do."

"Erik, please... You can tell me the truth." I rested a hand on his cheek, but he swiftly removed it and rested it back into my lap. I took a deep breath, frustrated and hurt. "You're jealous of Gil... aren't you?"

"I'm not jealous of anyone!" Erik exclaimed angrily. "Why? Why would I be jealous of him!"

"You can't even say his name! You're acting as if... as if he's under the rest of us! As if he is an outsider!"

"He is an outsider!" Erik yelled, his voice loud against the almost still night, the waves licking the shore the only sound.

"So was I not that long ago!"

"That—That was different!" Erik threw his hands up in the air in exasperation. "You were lost. You genuinely didn't know where you were or who you were and had no ill motive."

"I'm failing to understand the issue, Erik." I slowly enunciated his name through gritted teeth, agitated.

"He came from Qleph, Alyce! He showed up out of nowhere, with no explanation! Are you sure we can even trust him?"

"What kind of question is that? Of course we can trust him! He's my best friend—my family! I know him better than anyone!"

"But is Gil really the same as when you last saw him? Do you really know him anymore?" Erik eyed me, and I jolted in shock. He knew, of course he knew, it was probably written all over me. "Can we trust someone that was under Torryn's and Cyrus's rule and mercy for so long?"

"Well, so was I, Erik. So maybe you don't really know me either then." I countered, crossing my arms.

"Maybe I don't." Those words stung like sharp teeth piercing my skin, taking a piece of me. A wave of silence washed over us. Icy cold wrapped around me like a thick blanket, suffocating me. He sighed deeply, his fists clenching and unclenching slowly, refusing to make eye contact with me.

"So that's it then?" I asked quietly. "We are done? We just have to act as if we don't care about each other anymore?" If he walked away, we would be done in more ways than one. We might never be able to come back from it, to be what we were not even 24 hours ago. And I knew, deep down, I wouldn't be able to help but want to fix it again.

"No, this is not my fault. Don't put it all on me. I would have killed for you. You were the one that tricked me, abandoning me here all for a plan to let yourself get killed in Qleph. You didn't say goodbye to anyone. You—" he was pointing at me, but lowered his hands back to his sides, his eyes glistening. He shut them tightly and his voice was pained, angry. "I would have waged a war for you! If I had been given the choice, if you had given me the choice, I would have picked war over you risking your life every single time. Would have picked war over the countless days, sitting here, not knowing if you were alive or dead—"

He stopped cold as I leaned forward and trailed a hand slowly up his bare chest, finally resting a hand to cup his cheek. Our lips touched, brushing each other, our breaths mingling. Then we kissed, it was light, and he tasted faintly of salt from the sea. His skin was warm to the touch and his fair hair was wet but starting to curl, and I let my fingers tangle in it happily.

He finally pulled away, abruptly, almost scaring me. He had scrambled to his feet and had backed away from me as if I were a monstrous, horrendous creature that had just crawled out of the ocean. He ran a hand over his face, over his hair, as if trying to wipe away what had just happened.

"Your lies hurt, Alyce. How can you touch me when I can see the way you look at him. You are slowly abandoning me again, and yet you play with my emotions as if it's a game to you."

"Erik, I would never—" I stood up quickly, reaching out to console him, but he pushed my hand away, coldly. I choked back a sob, holding my rejected hand to my chest. He turned his back to me, and I let my quiet tears spill down my cheeks, unseen. His voice was faint, as if he couldn't trust himself to speak.

"Be careful... Cyrus is probably no better than his father. Just think... Information on Siva for your lovers freedom." With that, he started for the castle.

"You're just pinning all your jealousy and hate of Gil onto me and Cyrus!" I yelled after him frustrated and angry, my voice giving away my sadness, but deep in the back of my mind, his words tugged at me...

And I just stood there, for the second time that night, and watched as someone important to me walked away from me.