Everything seems dark,
It's all hazy,
I need the light or else,
I guess I'll go crazy.

You were my everything,
You will always be.
I feel like I'm drowning,
I can't survive, I need you to help me.

I'm alone,
I'm lonely,
You were my only desire,
I'm sorry, I couldn't protect you from the Fire.

Find me,
Heal me,
Come back,
I'll still be waiting because you're mine and you weren't supposed to leave me.

I love you.

Namjoon's POV:- (Present Day)

I'm a songwriter, but that's not a song, those are my emotions, my love and my warmth towards her. I shut my diary and tossed it somewhere on the floor thinking why is she not with me right now, I'm dying in this hell all alone. I don't even know where I am and how did I reach here.

Why am I lost again? Why are you not with me? Remember you vowed a today, tomorrow and forever, what about that, Jane?

I squealed looking at her beautiful picture on the wall, "Kim Jane, I love you and I always will but I guess, my arrogance, the beast inside me didn't let me love you enough. I assure I'll be a good man. Come back and stay with me again, please."

Drinking another glass of alcohol with a cigarette in my hand, regretting the realization that I just came back to the stage where I was before I met her.

I am still waiting for her to come along and stay with me, I wish I knew what happened so I could save her from that pain that she might have gone through.

I got up from the couch and kneeled in front of her photograph and wailed sobbing, "You were wrong. You made me believe that a person like me could be loved, that I could be a better man but it was all a lie. You left and I'm here all alone. I finally started loving myself, my family, friends. It was all because of you, Jane."

I couldn't stop weeping as I kept crying out looking at that beautiful picture of her. "I know I'm a man who wasn't good for you, you could get anyone else, every other guy would love you more than me but for me, you were the only one that mattered."

I bent my knees on the floor near her portrait, that's the only place where I manage to fall asleep and sleep talk begging her to come back. I've pleaded her every day, every night to hold me close and stay with me like before but why doesn't she listen to me. Why doesn't she come back?

-------------NEXT MORNING--------------

I woke up feeling dizzy, the smell of alcohol was all over me and I still remember how much my wife hated it. Days when I came home drunk from a party or with friends, she used to chide me for drinking over my limit. She was the only one who wasn't scared of me no matter what I said or did, thinking about her makes me smile.

The way she woke me up every morning showering me with kisses and as I woke up flickering my eyes, she used to get up from the bed and sway her waist teasing me before going to have a bath. I used to get aroused because of her actions. The minute I would get up to grab her, she'd shut the door and make me regret why I didn't wake up earlier.

I cannot sleep anymore, intoxicants being my friends have helped the entire time. I cannot imagine my life without that woman, she made me a good person and now, what am I supposed to do with that?

"What happened that night? What happened to my wife?" These are the only two questions I have in my head for a week. This week feels like a year, I can't spend a few days without her and the doctor said that she's no more, what am I supposed to do alone?

It was our anniversary and she was about to come home, I prepared a cake for her too but... She didn't and later, I was informed about her demise.

I keep talking to myself since there's no one else who would listen to me despite her and now, she's not here either.

Tears pooled around my eyes. I turned to look at her picture on the wall, "I promise you, Jane, I won't give up. I'll find out who it was. I'd end his existence, I'll do anything I can, my life is nothing without you and I don't want it anymore. Once, just for once, I find the person who ended our world I'll kill him, with my bare hands," I said and locked the door.

Every day without her seems like a burden to me. I'm alive but still dead and I wish she were here for me. I'll find it out all alone, I need serenity and you need Justice, I'd get it for us. That shall be the day, I'll get peace.

I couldn't waste more time, I need proofs, I need to find who was it, who took you away when everything was fine.

-

I met Jane 2 years ago, I remember every bit of her. Her pictures, those videos I used to keep taking, I have all of it saved with me. Looking at it now makes me smile and cry at the same time, she was adorable. I loved her even more than she did to me. But, what happened suddenly and why didn't she come home on our anniversary?

-----------

A/N:-

I'm sobbing too!

Let's see what happened 2 years ago, how they met and who are the both of these, see you in the next chapter❤️
This is a Mystery, Romance Fanfiction. Please, please let me know your views💜✨