Chapter 30: Redeemed
When Tyler kissed me, the outside world faded away. . . only he and I existed in our own private bubble of happiness. But bubbles pop when they get too high, or when mothers knock on library doors.
"Tyler, we need to talk. Now." She stepped into the room without asking if she could enter.
Really, she couldn't wait a few more minutes? Why did I forgive this woman? I sighed and reluctantly unwrapped my hands from Tyler's. He still held the flash drive in his fist.
Was that what Mrs. Price wanted- the flash drive I gave to Tyler to prove how much I cared about him?
He had to decide what to do with it next. It was literally out of my hands.
I kissed Tyler on the cheek. "And I have to leave for a sleep over at Melaney's house. I left my back pack in your car. Is it unlocked?"
"Yeah. Have fun, and call me tonight, please." His spoken request was gentle, but his eyes begged me not to forget.
"I will. Have a good night, Mrs. Price," I said, trying to be sincere, as I brushed past her on my way out of the library.
I strolled down the hall, out the door to Tyler's car, retrieved my back pack, and headed to Melaney's house. We also needed to talk, to clear the air, of the Dean-sized elephant in the room.
For once, I wasn't in any hurry to get there.
I needed to tell Melaney about everything, including Dean's kiss. I couldn't keep it a secret any longer.
Whenever the memory resurfaced in my head, I shoved it to the back of my subconscious, because I had other, more important, things to think about. But now, I had to face the fact that Dean kissed me because he was in love with me and Melaney was still in love with him. How could I discuss all this with Melaney without her getting hurt more than she already had?
And why did Dean fall in love with me? I never gave him any indication that I would ever feel the same. In my mind, Dean was my foster brother and best friend. I loved him like a sister would love a brother. We had lots of fun together, with Melaney and by ourselves.
When did our friendship turn to more for him? Why did I never notice? Okay, I knew why. Because I was obsessed with Tyler. But Dean knew how I felt about Tyler, since the first week he lived with us and broke into my journal. So it was his own fault if I broke his heart, like he broke Melaney's. I refused to feel guilty for loving Tyler.
It's NOT my fault that Dean hurt Melaney. It's NOT my fault that Dean hurt Melaney. If I repeated the sentence a thousand times, would I finally believe it?
Too soon, I arrived at Melaney's house and knocked on the front door. When no one answered, I went in and up to her bedroom. She was sitting on her bed, propped up against the pillows, reading Wuthering Heights for probably the hundredth time. I read it once, trying to understand why she liked it so much. It was very hard to read. Torture would have been less painful.
I sat beside her on the bed. "I never thought I'd say this, but real life isn't a fairy tale, and it's not a Gothic novel, either. You need to find a new favorite book. That one is too depressing."
Melaney closed the book and set it on her nightstand. "Like my love life."
I took a deep breath and decided to be brutally honest. "You have a guy who adores you, but you refuse to date him. Why won't you date Shawn?"
"Because he's not Dean."
"That's exactly why you should date Shawn!"
She shook her head. "I can't stop thinking about Dean. It wouldn't be fair to Shawn."
"But he's been in love with you for years. It's not fair that you won't give him a chance." I had to convince her to go out with Shawn. He could help her get over Dean.
"Dean used me to try to forget about you. I won't do that to Shawn. I know how much that hurts."
Ouch. Talk about not being fair. "Okay. You're right as always. But it's NOT my fault that Dean hurt you."
She refused to look me in the eye.
"Is it?"
Several silent seconds passed by while I waited for her answer.
"Laney?"
She whispered, "No. It's not your fault."
"I honestly don't know what I should've done differently. Well, maybe one thing. I should've slapped him when he kissed me."
Melaney did not look surprised, which surprised me. I was expecting her to be angry for not telling her sooner. "Dean told me that kiss was when he knew for sure that he was really in love with you, but I knew how he felt about you when I broke up with him. It just took him a while to realize it." She sounded so sad, but also resigned to the fact that Dean didn't love her, anymore.
"Dean told you?"
"Yeah. We talked the other day after you told me to knock some sense into him. I tried and failed. He knows you love Tyler, but that doesn't change the way he feels about you. And I know Dean loves you, but I can't change the way I feel about him. And I know none of this is your fault."
"I wish I could change the way Dean felt about me. I hate being the reason you're not happy. I want you to have your happily ever after, too, like I have with Tyler."
"You do. That's incredible!" Her smile was genuine. "So what exactly happened with Mrs. Price?"
"I told her that I forgave her and she needed to get help, and Tyler is going to make sure she does. Tyler said he cares about me. No matter what happens with his mother. And to prove I care about him more than justice, I gave him the flash drive that Dean recorded of Mrs. Price confessing to causing the accident. Did Dean tell you about it?"
She shook her head.
"Dean gave it to me this morning at the graveyard. He recorded it when he drove Mrs. Price home from the book club meeting. I think he felt guilty about making me tell Tyler the truth about the accident. He wanted Tyler to stop liking me, but it didn't work. Hopefully, Dean will stop interfering in my life from now on."
She sighed. "I doubt it."
"Yeah, me too. He gave me a pink rose at the graveyard and said, 'Remember I will love you forever, even if you never love me.' I'm so sorry about everything, Melaney."
"I'm sorry, too. Dean apologized to me for leading me on. He never intended to hurt me. I know that, but it still hurts. My motto is to forgive and forget, so I will, eventually, just like you forgave Mrs. Price. You did the right thing, forgetting the past and moving forward toward the future."
"I couldn't have done it without you. Best Friends for Infinity?" I put out my hand for her to shake.
She grabbed my hand and pulled me into a hug. "For Infinity and Beyond."
A/N: Video above is Redeemed by Big Daddy Weave.
"I am redeemed.
You set me free.
So I'll shake off these heavy chains,
and wipe away every stain.
Now I'm not who I used to be.
I am redeemed."
Have you forgiven someone who hurt you?
Let me know in the comments.
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