"Good morning-" Alec's raspy voice sounded from behind me, his arms wrapping behind me as I filled my cup of coffee the next morning.

"Hi-" I softly smiled and leaned back into him, looking up at him, "Coffee?-"

"Yes, please-" Alec kisses my temple, his hand slipping down my arm, playing with the fabric of his shirt that I had put on, "Mine?"

I was dressed in a pair of black ripped jeans, a cropped white tank top and his shirt over top, that was unbuttoned, along with black combat boots.

"I may have borrowed- what's new?" I poured a separate mug of coffee, then turned in his hold and held it in my palm for him to take, "We don't have much- it's either we go out for breakfast- or have breakfast at the Institute- we really need to go grocery shopping- and start arranging some furniture-"

"We'll get to that-" Alec put a strand of my straightened hair behind my ear and leaned in, pecking my lips a few times, a smile forming on my lips, "I say we go out for breakfast-"

"Sounds like a great idea-" I packed his lips back then took a sip of my coffee, putting a strand of my hair behind my ear, a wide smile playing at my lips.

That was until I felt a sharp pain in my arm, familiar to what I had felt last night, making me gasp immediately and set down my coffee before I spilt it.

"What's wrong?-" Alec's eyes slightly widen in concern, "What is it?-"

I pulled up my sleeve to see letters being carved into my arm just like last night, my blood filling the lines that Jonathan drew, words being written.

Don't you miss me too?

I stared at them, small tears rimming in my eyes from the pain, before I moved past Alec and opened one of the drawers where I had put utensils in.

Alec turned to face me and took a few steps to follow me, his eyes wide while watching my every movement, "Zee, what're you doing?-"

"Sending a message-" I pulled out a knife from the drawer and pulled my arm back, my eyes glued to the words in my arm.

Alec raises his voice in panic, "Zee!-"

I didn't listen, piercing the blade into my arm, right across the letters he had written on my arm of the word miss.

"Zee, are you crazy?-" Alec rushed to my side, his hands gently going to my forearms, looking over my shoulder, "Don't hurt yourself-"

I didn't reply, pulling out the blade from my bleeding arm, watching at the wound, along with the words slowly healing and disappearing from my skin.

-

"You found all this in Elliot's book shop?" Alec's voice filled my ears as I walked down the halls of the Institute toward our office.

"Yeah, he kept detailed records on the whereabouts of all sorts of Shadowhunter relics-" Luke's voice followed, "If you're looking for the sword Jonathan's after, it's a good place to start-"

"Well, we'll get a team on this right away." Alec's voice got louder and more clear when I was right by the office, "We'll call if we find anything-"

"Hi, Luke-" I waved right when I walked into the office, then rushed over to Alec and pushed myself off by the chair he was standing by and hopping onto his back, "Hi, my love-"

"Hey, Zee-" Luke smiles at me lightly, then left the room, leaving Alec and I alone.

"Hey-" Alec set the book he was holding down and grabbed my thighs to hold me up, leaning his head back to look at me, "You seem like you're- in a better mood-"

"Oh, you know- stabbing yourself so your psychotic brother can take a hint really takes it out of ya-" I shrug lightly, then leaned my cheek on his shoulder, looking at him, "I'm sorry you had to see that- I went crazy for a second-"

"It's alright-" Alec let go of one of my legs, a gasp leaving my lips as he pulled me to his front, then set me onto the desk, "I'm just glad you didn't go- extreme."

"Extreme?-" I looked at him confused, then my eyes widen in realization, "Oh- extreme-"

"Please don't go extreme." Alec rested his hands on my thighs, kissing my nose, "Because if you do, I'd bring you back to life and kill you myself-"

"Oh?" I blink, "That's very sweet of you-"

Alec pursed his lips to hold back a smile, staring at me, "Zee, I'm serious-"

I purse my lips as well, "Oh- yes, of course- you look- very- very serious right now-"

Isabelle's voice filled my ears, making my head snap towards the door, "Hey, am I interrupting something?"

"No-" I lightly pushed Alec away and started to lightly swing my legs, still on the desk, "What's up, hun?"

"Well-" Isabelle trailed off slowly, bringing up what she had filled us in on last night, "I was thinking about what Sentry Greenlaw said before he was murdered-"

Alec looks at her, "Isabelle, what did Mom say about meddling in Clave affairs?"

"He said he had information on what was going on at the Gard and was killed for it." Isabelle shot back at him, "Aren't you interested in knowing what he had to say?"

I raise an eyebrow, hopping off the desk, "I am-"

"His last word was inside." Isabelle said, "And I think he was being literal- I want to do an autopsy."

I looked at her, "Iz- don't you think Jia might notice if we return a body that's already been cut open?"

"I'll be stealthy." Isabelle lightly shrugged, "Come on, this is important- it's our responsibility to find out what's really going on here."

I shot Alec a look, as he sighed lightly, nodding once, "Twenty-four hours- and then I'm reporting it to the Clave."

-

"We're really supposed to read through every page until we find a mention of the Morning Star Sword?" Underhill huffed lightly, looking between Alec and I.

"I can take it from here?-" I suggested, looking between the two, "If you guys are tired- I just- I don't really have anything to do-"

Alec denied, "No- we're going to help you."

Underhill sighs, "There's got to be a faster way."

"I can help speed things up-" Magnus strides into the room, magic bursting between his fingers tips as he lifts every single page in the air and spin them over and over, picking a few pages from the bunch, then dropping them, "Hm- all the pages referencing the Morning Star Sword-"

Underhill looked amused.

Alec and I shared the same expression.

Confusion on what the hell was going on.

"I- Magnus?-" I blinked a few times, still in shock.

Alec asks the question that was burning in both of our minds when we followed him into our office, "Magnus, how did you get your magic back?-"

"I got some help from Lorenzo." Magnus simply said, setting down the pages in his hand, looking at me, "Biscuit- c'mere-"

"Lorenzo?" I slowly walked over to him, watching him as he grabbed my hand and twirled me with how happy he was, then had me sit down on the couch, "Why would he help you? He hates you-"

"He's the High Warlock- it's his job-" Magnus crouched in front of me, waving his magic sparking hand in front of me over and over, "Now, first things first- I think I know how to help you- just stay still-"

I stared at Alec with the same look I had a few moments ago, then looked at Magnus, who then held his palm in front of me, a bottle with a blue liquid appearing, "I made this for you earlier- if I'm right- this should break the barrier between you and the connection to your abilities- and Isabelle-"

"You did this?-" I looked from the bottle, up to him.

Magnus stares at me, "It's the reason that pushed me to get my magic back- I couldn't watch you suffer when there was something I could do about it."

I stared at him, then moved past his arm and hugged onto him tightly, my chin resting on his shoulder, "Even if it doesn't work- thank you so much for trying."

"Anything for you, biscuit-" Magnus exhales through his nose, hugging me back, before slipping away and placing the bottle in my hand, "Come on- drink it."

I swallowed hard and looked from Magnus to Alec, as he gave me a small nod to go on.

I popped open the bottle and tilted it upwards, letting the bitter liquid touch my tongue, gulping it down quick and easy, squeezing my eyes shut at the taste, setting the bottle aside.

Magnus stood up and took a step back, his eyes glued to me, anxious to see if I was myself again, "Well?-"

Alec looked just as anxious, "How do you feel?-"

"I- I don't know-" I slowly got up, beginning to say but my sentence was cut off by my own gasp at the stinging on the side, pulling my shirt to the side quickly to see what it was.

It was my parabatai rune.

I looked up, my eyes wide, immediately placing my palm out, staring at it, focusing on my abilities.

And that was when my sun rune seared onto my palm and brightened up the room, my eyes bright gold.

The moment the sunlight dimmed, I threw my arms around Magnus, my eyes going teary, "I love you!"

Magnus held me tightly, lifting me off the ground, his grip strong, "I love you too-"

"Thank you- god, thank you so much-" I sniffled, pulling away after holding onto him tight for a few moments, gripping his arms, then looking at my relieved boyfriend, "Alec!-"

"I know, I know- come here-" Alec lifted me off the ground when I rushed over to him, spinning one, holding me tight.

A wide smile was on my lips.

One of relief.

And happiness.

"Now that- that problem has been solved, we can move onto the next-" Magnus snapped back into reality after watching me squeal and leap in joy with a soft smile on his lips, picking up a page, "This- is a list of transactions involving the Morning Star sword- and according to this ledger, it ended up in the hands of Liam Janssens."

I let Alec drop me to my feet, wiping my tears, clearing my throat, "That doesn't sound like a Shadowhunter name-"

"No, he's a mundane and very wealthy- collector from Antwerp." Magnus looked from the page up to us, "Apparently, he was so obsessed with the Sword that he was buried with it. Fancy a trip to Belgium?"

Alec remarks, "So we can go grave-robbing?"

I look at him, "Well, don't put it that way-"

Before Magnus could move, immediately hopped and put a hand on his arm, excitement striking within me, "Can I do it?-"

Magnus looked at me, his expression softening, nodding once, "Go ahead, biscuit-"

"Okay-" I squealed a little, then stood straight and cleared my throat, focusing and zoning in on my abilities.

My eyes grew bright gold, my portal rune appearing in front of me, before pushing my palm towards it, opening it right up.

I squeaked trying to contain my excitement, smiling widely, flipping my hair over my shoulder, before walking into the portal with Magnus and Alec.

-

"Let's just grab the Sword and get out of here." Alec immediately said when we went further down, "Don't touch anything you don't have to."

"Squeamish seeing a dead body?" I looked at him.

Alec shot me a look, "No- I'm squeamish about disturbing a man's grave."

"Oh- I see-" I crossed my arms, walking over to Magnus with him, who was already pulling out the sword, "Is that it?-"

Magnus blew out air, "Nope."

"What?" Alec asked.

"The sheath appears to be authentic, onyx-plated silver- but the blade, not so much." Magnus handed it off, "It's a fake- someone beat us to it."

I look up, "Jonathan?"

"I don't think so." Magnus lightly shook his head, "Judging from the cobwebs, it's been at least twenty years."

"There's an inscription-" Alec looked down at the metal, reading off what it said in Latin, his eyes scanning the sword.

Magnus began to translate, "Sword of Lucifer, whose might will drive the fallen-"

"-from the many realms of Hell." I purse my lips.

Magnus exhaled slow, "With the real sword, Jonathan can summon an army of demons."

-

"Let's be quick-" Magnus said when we got back to his apartment, starting to pile things into a bag, "I have a couple of books that I want to bring that might mention the sword- and it couldn't hurt to take along a few apothecary supplies-"

"What're you doing?-" I watched him in confusion, "Why are you packing so much? We can just come back after we check in at the Institute- it'll take like two minutes-"

Magnus stopped, slowly looking at me, swallowing hard, "Actually, I don't think that's possible."

I blinked a few times, my eyes glued to him, my voice become slightly stern, "Alec- could you give us a moment?"

Alec didn't hesitant, placing a kiss on my head, before leaving the room and shutting the door behind him.

I immediately asked, my expression hard, "What do you mean it's not possible?"

Magnus sighed and set down the bag, "When Lorenzo gave me my magic back, he did so at a price."

"You're joking-" I scoff lightly, "He asked for your-"

Magnus nods once, "Apartment-"

"Why?" I ask.

Magnus huffed, "I wasn't in a position to refuse-"

I exhaled slow and stared at him for a few seconds, then turned, "I'll kill him."

Magnus immediately grabbed my arm, "Biscuit, no."

"Are you kidding me, Magnus?" I spun back to face him, "He took advantage of you- he stole your home, and I'll be damned if I don't make him pay for it-"

"He didn't steal it- I gave it to him." Magnus held his grip on my arm, "And if I had to, I'd do it again."

I stare at him, "I don't understand."

"I've had many, many happy memories in this apartment-" Magnus let go of my arm and looked around, "But at the end of the day, it's just a thing."

"My magic, it makes me feel alive-" Magnus then gestured to me, "Like you- with your abilities- you were so lost them- and now that you're reconnected with them- there's a light in yours eyes I haven't seen since you got back-"

"Your abilities make you- you- they make you special- and it's the same with my magic." Magnus explained, "Yes, I can do fabulous tricks, jet around the world, help the people I love- but, more than that- magic connects me to everything around me."

"Without magic, I feel like a stranger- the world keeps on going and it's like-" Magnus exhales slow, "It's like I'm not a part of it- it's like, suddenly, I don't matter-"

I took a step, "Magnus, of course you matter-"

"I know. I know, Zee- but, without magic, I can't feel it." Magnus put his hands on my shoulders, "This apartment is not important-"

"I have you and I have my magic- truly, that's enough." Magnus said to me, "Please, try and be happy for me."

-

"You're not going to tell me where we're going?" I questioned, Jace holding a tight grip on my hand as he pulled me along with him later that day after calling me to meet him, "On the phone you made it sound- urgent- I thought someone was dying-"

Jace kept a fast pace, "You'll like it- I promise."

"Like it?" I stopped suddenly, making him stop with me, pulling my hand away from his, "Jace, what's going on? You're being weird- and secretive-"

"I'm not being weird-" Jace looked down at me with a soft smile, "Just wanted to get you outside- to have fun- I mean- come on- we've been apart for far too long-"

"We already- had this conversation-" My eyebrows furrowed in confusion, "We ordered in and sat in my room-"

Jace quickly said, his eyes glued to me, "Something that doesn't have to do with work-"

"You mean Jonathan?" I corrected him and crossed my arms, "Actually- you know what, speaking of him- he carved into my skin that he missed me last night- then sent another message this morning."

Jace blinks, "Are you okay?"

I shrug, "I'm fine- he used his Iratze when I stabbed my arm to send a message back-"

"And what message does stabbing your arm send?" Jace questioned, looking between my eyes.

"For him to back the hell off, that's what." I sigh and placed my hands on my hips, "I mean- whatever, I can't stop him- but- still, he won't stop trying to reach me."

Jace lightly shrugs, "Well, I can't really blame him for being crazy about you-"

"I- what?" I blinked, staring at him, "What're you on- Jace, the guy kidnapped me and held me hostage- took away my abilities- convinced me that you killed Alec- I mean-"

Jace cut me off, "But- he did it out of love."

"Out of love." I repeated, staring at him, feeling completely off with the way he was replying to me.

"I'm sorry- you're right." Jace sighed and ran a hand through his hair, "That must've been very traumatic."

I still felt off, "Yeah-"

"You activated your anti-tracking rune, right?" Jace reaches over and put a strand of my hair behind my ear, giving me even more of an uncomfortable feeling.

I barely nod, "Yeah- I double checked."

"Good- then no one can hurt you." Jace grabbed my hand again, linking our fingers this time, "And if they try, I'll be here to protect you."

-

My eyes followed Jace when we reached the Promenade, as he picked up a rose from the stand when no one was looking, bringing it back to me and handing it to me with a soft smile, "Jace- what're you- you're not supposed to just- take those-"

It was weird he was even giving me a rose.

He was being weirdly romantic.

And it set me at unease.

Jace shrugs, "There was no one there to stop me."

"What, so suddenly you're suddenly some kind of outlaw now?" I don't make eye contact with him, my eyes glued to the rose he had given me.

"You're right- I'm sorry." Jace exhales, his eyes locked on me, "I think I just forget myself around you."

"Uhm- that's new-" I looked up at him after an uncomfortable wave washed over me from his stare on me, "I thought we were past that-"

Before I could say anything else, Jace took a step closer to me and placed a hand on my side, pressing his lips into mine.

"Jace!" I pulled away immediately and raised my voice at him, "What is wrong with you-"

"I'm sorry-" Jace stammers, looking between my eyes, "I just- god, you're everything to me- and I can't- stand Alec being in the way of us-"

"Us? Jace!" I threw his rose to the ground, "I'm in love with Alec- and you're with Clary. I thought we were both on the same page about this- we discussed this- you and I aren't anything. We screwed up once, Jace- I thought it was clear that we weren't going to go down that road again- he's your best friend, Jace- how could you do this to him?-"

But that was the thing.

Jace wouldn't do that.

To either of us.

He wouldn't say that.

Let alone make a move on me.

"You're right- I'm sorry, that was- way out of line." Jace exhales, looking down, then back up at me, "Forgive me?"

I stared at him, swallowing hard, then putting on a forced smile, "I forgive you-"

Jace blinks, "Really?"

"Yes, really-" I slowly sat down on the bench, looking up at him, "Could you maybe get me some water? I'm dehydrated-"

"Oh, I'm so stupid- It's me- I've been running you ragged all over the city." Jace points at me, "Stay right here-"

"Not going anywhere-" I fake smiled at him, as he walked away and towards the truck to get me a bottle of water.

I slowly picked up the rose from the ground and purposefully pricked my finger, looking up at Jace, noticing how he immediately hissed and looked at his thumb where I had pricked mine.

I immediately turned slightly away, making it look like I was just picking up the rose and placed it on my lap, pulling out my phone and instantly calling Isabelle.

Isabelle answered right away, "Zee?-"

"Iz- listen to me." My voice was quiet, "I'm on the Promenade with Jonathan- he's glamoured himself to look like Jace."

Isabelle asks, "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, he doesn't know I know-" I replied to her, "But- you need to find Jace, he's probably hurt- he told me to meet him at an ice rink in Chelsea? I don't know- Jonathan must have ambushed him there."

"Just sit tight-" Isabelle inhales, "I'll find Jace- get Alec, then I'm coming for you."

"Okay, okay-" I swallow hard, "I'll deactivate my anti-tracking rune-"

"Good idea." Isabelle responded, "Once we find you, you can use your Somnus rune."

I tapped my foot anxiously, "But- that'll only sedate him for a minute-"

Isabelle replies, "That's enough time to take him into custody-"

Jonathan glamoured as Jace came up behind me, making me immediately hang up, "Who's that?"

"Oh- it was- uhm- Magnus-" I lied and shot up to my feet, looking at him, "He said- there was a report I needed to check up on- but- being one of the Heads of the New York Institute gives me the authority to take off whenever I want- so-

"Oh- alright." Jonathan flipped the bottle in his hand and handed it to me, "Shall we?"

-

"Jace, where are we going?" I kept a fast pace to keep up with Jonathan as he pulled me along, "Why all the secrecy?"

"If you really want me to, I'll ruin the surprise." Jonathan held a tight grip on my hand, "There's a gallery I've read about full of artists I think you'll like- it's up here-"

"Hey, wait-" I pulled on his arm and stopped him before he could lead me inside, "What's the rush?"

Jonathan looked between my eyes, swallowing hard, "There's no rush."

"I mean- maybe, but- I mean- I think you're right." I inhaled, lying straight through my teeth to buy some time, "From earlier?"

Jonathan blinks, "What?"

"Look, I've had some time to think- and-" I stare at him, swallowing hard, "I can't deny- what's between us, Jace. I just- I spend so much time with Alec- that I forget- what you and I have- I didn't realize it because it's so rare we get to spend any time alone together."

His eyes were glued to me, "Are you okay?"

"You seem a little on edge." Jonathan said.

"Well- maybe, I'm just scared what Alec will think when he realizes that I have it in for his parabatai." I lightly shrugged at him, then looked past him and noticed Jace, Alec and Isabelle rushing towards us, as I quickly grabbed Jonathan and knocked him onto the ground.

Jonathan deglamoured, breathing out while looking at me, "I thought we were enjoying our time together-"

I don't reply, pulling out my stele, ready to sedate him, when my eyes locked with his.

For some reason I stopped.

I couldn't do anything.

I knew I had to.

But, I didn't.

Jonathan used my hesitant state and pushed me off him, and ran off before Jace, Isabelle and Alec could reach us.

I threw myself up to my feet and looked in the direction he ran, my breathing slow, fear and regret burning in my chest.

"Are you okay?-" Jace asked when they came to a stop by me, "You had him, Zee."

I swallow hard, "I know."

Alec was breathing heavy, "What happened?-"

I looked down, my jaw clenched, "I don't know."

-

"You really are despicable, aren't you?" I confronted Lorenzo the moment he walked into Magnus' apartment, tense and at unease.

I was so furious for letting Jonathan go that I found myself here, wanting to call Lorenzo out on everything.

"Ah, Miss Young- what a pleasant surprise." Lorenzo walked toward me and stopped, "I didn't know you came with this apartment- does Mr. Lightwood know?"

I grit my teeth, "Funny."

"It really is a beautiful space, wouldn't you agree?" Lorenzo gestured around, "The perfect Brooklyn pied-à-terre."

"You're the High Warlock." I snipped at him, "You're supposed to protect people like Magnus, not exploit them."

"As a matter of fact, I did help Magnus." Lorenzo points out, "There's nothing to say that I shouldn't be compensated for it."

"Oh yeah?" I took a few steps, "I've seen your mansion- it's ten times bigger than this- you don't need this apartment- what you wanted- was to humiliate him."

"Yes, I did." Lorenzo didn't deny it, "And the fact that he sent his little girlfriend to plead his case tells me I more than succeeded."

"I am the Head of the New York Institute." My voice raised and went into a more stern tone, standing directly in front of him, "Don't speak to me like that."

"You're right." Lorenzo exhales, "Perhaps this is getting unnecessarily heated."

"And it's time we end it." I crossed my arms, "Give Magnus his apartment back- and I'll make you a deal, a fair one- one not beneath your dignity as a leader."

"Let me tell you something about being a leader." Lorenzo folds his hands, "When a subordinate comes to question your judgment and launches a fireball in your face, it's your duty to put him in line."

"Your boyfriend still hasn't accepted that I'm the High Warlock now- not him." Lorenzo's words pissed me off more, but made me feel sympathetic for Magnus, "If I had to break his spirit to teach him that, so be it."

"Enjoy this position while it lasts." I scoff lightly, a glare fixed on my expression, "The Clave doesn't take kindly to conniving, unethical Downworld leaders- and when you slip up? I'll be waiting there to take you down."

-

"Hey-" Jace walked into Alec and I's apartment, as I was seated on the ground alone in our bedroom, my back leaned against the wall and my legs crossed, peaking his head through the door, "I let myself in- do you have any snacks?"

I looked at him, a soft smile forming on my lips as I leaned my head back against the wall, "Alec and I bought ice cream earlier-"

Jace snaps his fingers, then leaves the room, coming back and sitting next to me with the bucket of ice cream and two spoons, popping it open and scooping some onto a spoon, then holding it in front of my mouth with a small smile on his face.

"Alec's gonna be real mad when he finds out we ate all the ice cream-" I put my mouth around the spoon and took it from him, eating the ice cream off it.

"You'll handle him-" Jace shrugs and spoons some into his mouth, as I immediately shot him a look, "What? He likes you-"

I softly laughed and looked down at my hands, messing with the spoon in my hands.

"Hey- don't beat yourself up." Jace lightly nudged my arm, "I couldn't kill Valentine, remember?"

"That's different, Jace-" I spooned some ice cream and ate it, "Valentine raised you- and I've killed Jonathan before- I just- I mean- I didn't even have to kill him. I had to draw a rune and- I couldn't."

Jace went quiet for a few seconds, then looked at me, leaning his head against the wall, "When Jonathan was disguised as me, did he- did he do anything to you?"

"He kissed me." I leaned the side of my head against the wall like him, looking at him, "Told me- Alec was in the way of us- that- I was everything to you."

Jace's expression dropped, "Oh- Zee, I-"

"I know." My voice remained soft, looking between his eyes, nodding once, "I knew the moment he said that- that it wasn't you. I should've known earlier- but, he got me with the- spend some time alone together- no work- just hanging out."

"We're gonna make this right, Zee." Jace stared at me, his eyes filled with sincerity, "I swear to you that we're going to free you of him. I'm not going to let you suffer like this-"

"Jace-" I swallowed hard and looked down, breathing in slowly, "Can you promise me something?"

Jace immediately nods, "Anything-"

"That if we don't separate Jonathan and I-" I began to say, "That you'll finish the job."

"Finish the job?" Jace started to repeat my words, until realization crosses his expression, "No-"

"Please, Jace." My voice went quiet, staring at him, my eyes starting to rim with tears, "I can't let myself be- alive if I'm going to be on the wrong side- against you guys-"

Jace stares at me, not replying, his eyes starting to burn with tears just as mine were.

"I know no one else will do it- and I trust you to do it when it's needed." I slowly held my pinky up, my eyes filled with tears, "Please promise me that you'll do it."

Jace sniffled and linked his pinky with mine, tears in his eyes falling, "I promise."

"Okay-" I exhale shakily, my tears falling as well.

"C'mere-" Jace lifted his arm, signaling for me to come closer, as I did, scooting into his side.

Jace wrapped his arm around me tightly and rested the bucket of ice cream on our laps, my head resting in the crook of his neck, as he leans his head against mine, the both of us eating the rest of the ice cream in silence.

authors note:

the zace moment at the end made me so sad

but, we stan zee being a loyal b

and ahhh magnus got his magic back to help zee

we love the cute zalec moments as well slsksk

also, very early update ! proud of myself

thank you for 110k !!

go read metanoia

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