My eyes crack open when I heard my door close, noticing Jace and Isabelle in my room.

I was laying on my stomach, buried in my blanket, holding onto the pillow I laid my head on.

My eyes shift between them in suspicion, "What're you two doing in my room?"

"Why are you still in bed?" Jace answered my question with a question, sitting by my legs.

"Because I'm going back to sleep." I pulled on the rest of my blanket and threw it over my head, "Be gone."

My bed dipped as Isabelle sat on the other side, Jace pulling off the blanket from my head, "No."

"Jace, just let me be depressed and alone- and asleep." I went to reach the top of my blanket again.

Jace stops my wrist, "I'll put the entire blanket off."

"That shows me the lack of care you have for me." I point at him, my eyes shooting him a look.

"Zee-" Isabelle held up the paper bag up, "This is your break up breakfast."

I look between them as Jace let go of my wrist, as I prop myself up onto my elbows, "My break up breakfast?"

Isabelle nods, "Your breakup breakfast."

"I don't need a breakup breakfast." I glanced between them, "I need to grieve in the peace of sleep."

"Zee-" Jace sat up, "We saw you throw out your breakfast and leave when you saw Alec sitting with us at breakfast this morning."

"Not because of Alec-" I sat up, running a hand through my tangled hair, "I don't have much of an appetite today-"

Isabelle points at me, "Because you broke up with Alec."

"Guys- I'm fine, I think you should be giving Alec this treatment." I looked down when I thought about the look on his face when I walked away from him, "He's probably taking this worse than I am."

"Well, we tried and he's pushing us away, saying that he's fine." Jace inhales sharply due to knowing exactly how his parabatai feels; literally, "I can feel how hurt he is- but he doesn't want to speak about it- he hasn't yet."

"I can't be with him." I inhale sharply, "Not like this."

Isabelle sets the bag on my lap, "Come on- it's from the cafe you like a lot."

"Thank you." I set the bag on my night stand, slipping out of bed, my hand touching the necklace gave me that was dangling around my neck still.

I blink, shaking my head, walking over to my mirror, noticing how tragic I looked, "I look horrible."

"I'm pretty sure if you went right now, he'd take you back immediately." Jace shrugs lightly, as I grabbed one of my pillows and chucked it at him, making him shut up.

-

[ alec's pov ]

"I saw her wearing the necklace at breakfast this morning." I walked with Jace, speaking to him about Zee for the first time since she broke up with me, "That means it's not over, right?"

Jace looks at me, walking with me down the halls of the Institute. "You're pining."

"Look who's talking." I scoff, and began mocking him, "Oh, I love her- oh, she's my sister- oh, why, why, why-"

"Okay, that's enough." Jace stops me, "But- can you honestly tell me that if you were in her situation, you wouldn't have done the same thing for her?"

I went silent, because I knew I'd do anything to protect her.

Then, I heard the familiar grunts from the training room.

I stopped instantly, looking into the room, noticing her.

Zee was dressed in a slim, thin navy blue shirt, that was tight on her skin but I could tell by the fabric that it was comfortable on her.

She never bought shirts that were tight and not comfortable, she always complained about how she would be able to breath if she was fighting a demon in a tight shirt like what she's seen girls around here wear.

My eyes raked further down, noticing the black jeans fitted perfectly on her legs, along with her usual black heeled boots.

Despite the heels, she would always be shorter than me, and the thought warmed my heart for some reason.

My eyes raked up, noticing the necklace I gave her on her neck.

My heart beat quickened almost instantly.

Her straight hair whipped around as she punched and kicked the bag over and over, grunting.

She looked beautiful, even in her normal everyday look.

Jace was behind me, "She's gonna notice-"

I don't reply. I was heart broken, but my heart was warming up at the sight of her.

I loved her so much.

If I would've admitted it then, maybe she would've stayed.

She stops, backing away, her hands holding onto her necklace tightly, as she panted.

It was like she was in her own world right now.

She crouched, pinching the bridge of her nose, a small sob sounding her lips, not letting go of the necklace.

A chest erupted in my chest as I watched her.

It hurt her too.

Right as I was about to walk over to comfort her despite what happened between us, she got up, wiping her tears.

She kicks the bag once more in frustration, then paced for a moment, catching her breath.

Then, she gasped, looking at her hand.

Pain was threaded in her expression, as she purses her lips to try and deal with it.

But, then it go too much for her to bare as she let out a cry in pain, and that's when I couldn't hold myself back anymore.

I almost ran over, "What's wrong- what's going on?"

Jace was right behind me, coming to my side as we looked down at her left hand, that was beginning to look like burnt flesh as it slowly spread down her fingertips.

"I don't know-" Zee doesn't make any attempt to avoid me, the pain overpowering her need to do so, as she let out another cry in pain, her voice breaking due to how much pain this was suddenly causing her, "Oh my god- Alec, it hurts so much-"

The way she called out for me when Jace was standing with her hit me hard.

It was giving me relief after her not speaking to me and avoiding me all together.

But, right now, I was focused on what was hurting her.

Jace looks at me, "We've got to get her to Magnus."

-

[ zee's pov ]

"La Chair Brulee." Magnus inhales sharply, identifying what was going on with my hand and why it caused me so much pain, as he had done a great job at taking it away for me.

I stare at him, "And that means?"

"It means the burnt flesh." Magnus told us, "It's an old blood oath spell."

"Then it must be Iris." Jace figures it out, "She said you owed her a favor."

"A painful one, clearly." I inhale sharply, "At Max's party, she said I have to find Madzie."

"Then we better start looking." Magnus said, "I can get rid of the pain, but that's about it."

"Thank you, Magnus." I stared at my hand, "At least you've done what you can."

Magnus then trails off, "I'm afraid once the magic reaches your heart-"

I looked up, and between him, Jace and I.

"If I don't find Madzie I'm screwed." I realized, speaking out loud what everyone was thinking, "Well, this couldn't get any better."

"No- no, absolutely not." Alec instantly said, shaking his head, "Magnus, there must be a cure."

Jace got up, "Alec's right, there has to be something we can do to stop this."

"Can't we force Iris to undo it?" Alec questioned, bringing up the possibility.

"I wish it were that easy." Magnus exhales, "But, blood oath spells are completely binding- even Iris herself can't reverse it now."

-

Luke's pack was out trying to pick up a scent of Madzie.

Alec had gotten word from the Clave that Madzie was abducted from Brady Park.

Clary, Simon and Jace were out looking for Madzie, visiting the park to see if they can find clues they can use to find her.

I had just gotten back from searching Iris' brownstone, which was completely wiped clean.

And Alec was on duty to watch over me.

Despite all my protests that I would be fine on my own.

I laid on my bed, staring at the ceiling when Alec walks into my room, "What're you doing?"

"Peacefully waiting for death in the comfort of my own bed." I simply reply, as I could feel the spell spreading up my arm slightly more, "What're you doing?"

"Watching over you to make sure you don't die in the comfort of your own bed." Alec sits in a chair, looking at me, "Zee, we'll find Madzie."

I sat up, my eyes connected with his and I could see how broken he was just by looking at him.

But, he was concealing it.

All I wanted to do was throw my arms around him and kiss him, but I was forcing myself to avoid him.

But now, he was stuck on babysitting me.

I bet he didn't want to babysit me, especially since I broke up with him. He probably hates me.

"When will everyone stop lying to me?" I questioned, "I mean, you're my friend, Alec. I'd expect you to be honest with me."

Alec winces at the name, "We will find her."

"How?" I shake my head, "Madzie was abducted by Valentine. The man faked his own death, you don't think he can hide a little girl?"

"We have everyone looking, okay?" Alec's voice sounded full of assurance, "I'm not letting this happen."

"Well- I'm prepared for anything." I move so I'm at the edge of the bed, staring right at him, "Are you?"

Alec's eyes scan my face, "Are you even the littlest bit scared?"

It's difficult being terrified for life when my life ended when I broke up with you.

"I don't know what to say to that." My voice went quiet, standing up, "Can we not talk about this, please?"

Alec pulled out his phone when it buzzes, my eyes falling onto his lock screen that was a photo of me, my necklace covered with the notification of Jace texting him back.

It was a photo he took of me when we went out for Chinese, and I had noodles dangling from my mouth, winking at the camera.

He hadn't changed it.

When he unlocked his phone with a swipe to reply to Jace, my eyes were greeted with another photo of me as his home screen, making my heart warm up and break at the same time.

In this photo, I was crouched in the ground, my eyes closed and my nose scrunched up as I pet a golden retriever puppy in the street, the puppy licking my cheek, the smile not leaving my lips.

I wanted to hold onto him and never let go.

But, I broke up with him for a reason and what's done is done. This is the right thing.

"No updates on Madzie." Alec exhales deeply, locking his phone.

"That's not what I worried about right now." My hand was over my parabatai rune, "Where's Izzy?"

-

"Magnus!" I walked into his apartment, Alec right on my tail, "You said you know where Izzy is?"

Alec and I had been looking for Isabelle all over. I had gotten the weird feeling again, and I knew that she wasn't okay.

She hadn't been seen since she spoke with Aldertree and when Alec confronted him about it, he had nothing to say.

I needed to see her.

And Alec, was worried about his little sister.

At this point, I knew I wasn't going to get rid of Alec, no matter how hard I tried to avoid him.

It just hurt to much being around him right now.

"Biscuit-" Magnus looked at me, "You should be resting-"

"I'm not spending my last few hours in this world not knowing what's wrong with Izzy- I need to find my parabatai." I hid my hand in my pocket of my leather jacket, nodding lightly, "I'm powering through."

Magnus touches my arm in comfort, "How are you?"

"The Downworld wants to kill my sister, I'm dying, my parabatai is missing and I am painfully single, other than that- I'm good." I barely glance at Alec, "Izzy- we need to focus on her."

Alec inhales sharply, "You know where she is?"

Magnus shoots us both a look, "Well, not exactly."

"Magnus." My voice was serious, "What's going on?"

Alec adds in, "And why do we seem to be the last person to know about it?"

Magnus takes a deep breath, "A couple days ago, I saw Isabelle trying to buy yin fen from a certain reprobate warlock at the Hunter's Moon."

I blink, "Yin Fen?"

Alec questions, "You sure it was her?"

Magnus nods, "I asked her what she was doing, but she told me that she was undercover."

"Why didn't you say anything?" asked Alec, and I could see the slight anger crossing his expression.

"She's an excellent liar." Magnus defended himself, "It wasn't until this evening that I put it all together."

"Something Meliorn said at the Downworld meeting." Magnus mentions, "I think she's getting her fix straight from the source."

Alec steps closer, as we both realized what he meant, "Where is she?"

"The DuMort." Magnus inhales sharply, "With Raphael."

I looked between them, walking past him and towards the door, my tone threaded in anger, "I get the first punch."

-

"Hey!" The vampire guard yelled as Alec and I walked through the hall, "What are you doing here? You can't go in-"

Alec lands a blow, the vampire grunting and falling to the ground.

I turned the corner, my eyes instantly landing on Isabelle with Raphael, on the red couch, as he pulled away from her wrist, squinting his eyes to see what was happening.

This made my anger build up as I walked closer and quicker, my fist coming in hard contact with his face, making his fly off the ground and land on the ground.

"Man- that felt good." I inhale sharply, shaking the pain off my hand as Raphael forced himself up.

Alec points at him, "You stay the hell away from her."

"Zee?" Isabelle could barely move, "Alec?"

"You don't understand." Raphael stepped back, "It was Aldertree who got her addicted to yin fen."

Alec and I both looked at him, speaking in unison, "What?"

"It's the truth." Raphael confessed, "I was only trying to help."

"By feeding her addiction?" I said in unison with Alec.

"By drinking her blood?" Alec scoffed, landing a punch on his jaw, as they both grunted, fighting amongst themselves.

Raphael got the upper hand and held onto Alec's neck, "It may have started with the blood, but it's more complicated than that, all right? I care about her."

Alec stopped trying to fight out of his grip and looked at him, "What did you say?"

"I-" Raphael stuttered, "I have feelings for her."

"Do you have feelings for her?" I took a step closer to them, "Or do you just like the way you feel when you're feeding on her?"

Isabelle exhales heavily, "Raphael, let him go."

Before Raphael could, Alec knocked him off his feet and started repeatedly punching him in the face.

"Stop it, this is my fault!" Isabelle climbed over the couch and to my side, "Zee, stop him, please!"

When I notice he's going too far, I ran over and tried pulling him off with the strength I had left, "Alec- stop!"

Magnus ran in, using his magic to stop him and pull him back, "Alec, stop!"

Alec got up, looking at Magnus, "This is my family!"

"If you had told me about the yin fen, none of this would have happened." Alec was shouting, my eyes glued to his bloody fist.

Magnus exhales deeply, "I didn't know-"

Alec shook his head, raising his voice, "You knew enough!"

"Hey-" I came between them, "Don't blame Magnus when you're really upset with Isabelle. We're lucky he told us."

"We're leaving." Alec grabbed Isabelle's arm, nodding for me to come along as he walked towards the exit, "Come on."

I looked between him and Magnus, "I'm sorry-"

"I understand." Magnus gave me a small hug, before I ran after Alec and Isabelle.

"Let go, Alec, I'm staying!" Isabelle was shouting when I finally joined them, "Alec, let go!"

"Izzy, come on!" Alec huffs when Isabelle rips her arm from his grasp.

"I know you think you're trying to make things right, but you're not." Isabelle shook her head, "Raphael's been there for me when I needed him."

"Are you hearing yourself right now, Izzy?" I stared at her in disbelief, stood with Alec.

Isabelle looks at me, "I mean it!"

"Needed him?" Alec scoffs, "Look at yourself."

"He saved my life." Isabelle stares between us, "You didn't even notice when something was wrong."

"I can't believe you just said that." I was in complete shock, "I'm your parabatai."

"He saved your life?" Alec was upset, "What are you-"

"I'm not your baby sister anymore, Alec." Isabelle yells, "Just go! I don't need your help."

"Izzy, please." Alec's tone fell.

"I said go." Isabelle repeated, before walking past us and back into the DuMort.

Alec shook his head in anger, walking ahead, "Come on."

I began following him, beginning to feel the spell spreading completely up my arm and to my chest.

I felt weaker than usual, and I knew it was spreading to my heart sooner than I thought it would.

I tried my best to keep up with him, but I slowed down, my voice was quiet, "Can we slow down?"

Alec doesn't reply, nor does he slow down his pace, the anger overpowering him.

"Alec-" My voice came out weak as my legs gave out and I fell onto the ground with a thud.

Alec's footsteps instantly stopped, as he turned and looked at me. He rushed over, falling onto his knees by me, "Hey- hey- hey-"

"It's spreading to my heart." My voice was raspy, my body to weak too move as my eyes locked with his, beginning to slowly close.

"Hey, no!" Alec scooped me up and sat on the nearest steps, as we were in an alley, still by the DuMort, no one around us, "Keep your eyes open, okay?"

I reached weakly for his hand.

If this would be my last few minutes with Alec, I wanted to be close with him.

"What?" Alec's eyes were filled with alert, "Don't close your eyes."

I grabbed his hand and held it in mine, making him freeze in shock, looking at me with slight wide eyes, not expecting me to do that.

My voice coming out as a whisper as I used every piece of strength left in me to keep my eyes open for him, "I find it ironic that I'm spending my last few minutes with you."

"No- Jace knows we're at the DuMort, okay? He'll get here-" Alec shook his head, but I could see the glossy sheet over his eyes, "He'll make it here with Madzie."

"Alec-" I squeezed his hand lightly, my voice coming out quicker, "It's okay."

Alec held my hand tightly, his eyes holding a red tint, "I can't lose you, okay- you need to hold on for a little longer-"

There was a pain in my chest at his words.

"Our fight-" His voice broke, the tears in his eyes falling, "I know- we haven't exactly been around each other since then- and I just- I'm sorry- and I want you to know no matter how upset I am about how you ended things- I understand why you did it, because if I were in that situation, I would've done the same thing for you."

"Hey-" My free hand reaches up, as I held his face, wiping away a tear, "Don't cry."

My breathing began to tremble, as I lost all strength.

My hand fell from his face, my eyes slowly closing.

My head fell back, as I took a struggled breath, what I thought would be my last one.

Then, Alec was shaking me, "Zee? No- no-"

Right as I began slipping away completely, a sound of a portal opening filled my ears, along with Clary's  cry, "Zee!"

"Hey- she's still with us right?" Jace's voice got closer, as I felt myself being pulled up and sat down on the stairs.

"Barely-" Alec sniffled, "Madzie."

My eyes shot open, as I exhale slowly, my eyes barely open due to how I couldn't hold on anymore, no matter how much I kept pushing.

I notice Alec stood with Jace and Clary, as Madzie slowly walked over to me, grabbing my hands.

Suddenly, I felt completely reenergized, the spell disappearing from my hand.

"Madzie." I looked at the girl in front of me, "Thank you-"

Madzie looked back at Alec, then at me, her voice quiet, "I'm sorry."

"What?" I stare at her in confusion, my eyes widening when she opens a portal, "Madzie, what're you doing-"

All I heard were Alec, Jace, and Clary's protests when Madzie brought the portal onto us.

-

When I opened my eyes, I was on the ground.

I slowly sat up, noticing all the amusement park rides around me in the room, making me even more confused than I already was.

I notice the Downworlders in cages, making my heart drop.

I stood up, noticing how I was chained to the ground.

I pulled on the chain, trying to free myself, but it was no use.

"Well done, Madzie." Valentine's voice filled my ears, "Your nana is gonna be so proud of you."

"But- you still have a lot more to do before you can see her, okay?" Valentine crouched to her height, "So run along."

Madzie turns and skips away, as I stood straight, staring at my father.

"Hello again, Zee." Valentine stood up, "You must still hate me for what happened to your mother."

"I don't blame you." Valentine inhales, "Margaret's death will always be my greatest regret."

I shook my head, "You're lying."

"Your mother was my first love." Valentine stared at me, "I love her."

"Do you have any idea what she would think if she saw this?" I scoffed, "If you have any shred of humanity left, you would stop this."

"My humanity is what keeps me going." Valentine shot back, "If the angels designed the Sword to rid the world of demons, I'm just ensuring it fulfills its true purpose."

"Then why am I here?" I asked, "I can't activate the Soul Sword- I'm not your precious Clarissa."

"But, you're my precious Zee." Valentine wickedly smiles at me, "Sweetheart, you're my bait."

I don't blink, "What?"

"When Jonathan told me that you were dying, I knew what to do." Valentine confesses, "It's only a matter of time before your sister tries to play hero and comes and saves you."

-

I pulled on the chain as hard as I could, grunting as I do.

Then, I heard footsteps, making my head snap up to the sound as I pulled harder.

I notice Jace with his seraph blade, making me fall, "Jace!"

"Zee!" Jace ran over, "Where's Valentine?"

"I don't know- all the Circle members just left in a hurry." I confessed, as he helped me up.

"Don't move." Jace used his blade to free me.

Clary ran over to me, engulfing me into a hug, "I was so worried-"

"Oh hell no-" I pulled away, "You need to go- right now-"

Clary looks at me confused, as I pulled her and Jace along, "Valentine used me as bait to get to you-"

Then, we all jerk to a stop when Valentine was walking toward us with Madzie, "Going someplace?"

"Madzie-" I stepped closer, "Listen to me-"

"I didn't think so." Valentine chuckles when Madzie used her magic, making Jace and I freeze, "She's strong for her age, isn't she?"

"Madzie." Clary crouched, "Hey, please- please let Jace and Zee go."

Valentine hums, "Now why would she do that, hmm?"

"Because you wanna hurt people." Clary said, "People like Iris."

"Don't forget this is the mean person that got your nana in trouble in the first place." Valentine lies, "Now, if you want to see Iris, you have to be a good little girl and do exactly what I say, okay?"

Suddenly, Simon was grabbing Valentine, "Guys, run!"

"Brave and stupid." Valentine instantly got the upper hand, looking at Madzie, "Sweetheart, save your magic for what's to come. It's time to go."

Madzie lets Jace and I go, as my eyes widen as she opens up a portal, "I'll see you soon, Clarissa."

"Wait-" I took a step closer, "Madzie, no!"

"Simon!" Clary cries out, running toward the portal as it shut, "Simon, no!"

authors note:

break up breakfast inspired by tvd

used what I believe is another book quote

zalec is goals and I'm crying

but I'm also sick and dying so we love that combination

vote and comment loaaads