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Broken Hearts

Mastoorah

That one night I spent was more than a disaster for me. I even never remained this distressed over my nightmares. As soon as I found myself a bit stable, I booked an Uber for myself and left for Aunt Hania's place. Raima Dadi, Dada Jaan, and Aunt Fiza tried to stop me but he was nowhere to be seen. After I told him that he shouldn't call me his Jaan as I hated him, he seemed very hurt. Even a tear dropped from his eye when I told him that his punishment as far as I was concerned would never end. But that was even fabricated as well. I couldn't believe I was considering a man who killed my mother as someone so respectful and thinking of him as my inspiration.

Outer appearances can be deceiving and today I saw a living example of it.

Eventually, I reached Aunt Hania's house at almost one in the night. She and Aunt Javaria were shocked to find me like this in this part of the night. Seeing her made me remember her relation to Aunt Ajwa and again to him, but I needed Aunt Hania right now. I needed to cry in her arms and for her to console me. Hence I broke down into tears while hugging her.

"Mastoorah beta, what's wrong?" She asked, still running her hand over my head to soothe me.

I told her everything from start to end.

It was eight in the morning now. Today was Eid day. When I woke up for the morning prayer, I came across Iyad's message.

'AssalamoAlaikum Mastoorah G. I am just about to leave for Karachi. Hoping to see you as happy as before.'

I sensed a weird feeling germinating in my heart. I kept on looking at his name on my screen.

Iyad; Faraan's nephew; Faraan; my mother's murderer.

It kept on going on in my head like a mantra. Disappointed by everything, I threw the phone away. After praying Fajar, when I was again about to lock my room, Aunt Hania came over to me.

"Mastoorah, Jaan. Please don't lock the door now. No one will disturb you but please keep the door unlocked. For your Aunt's sake," she said, holding my face in between her palms.

She was like a mother to me. Someone who had rescued me. So I agreed and did as she said. After that, when I again reached the bed, I fell asleep. Maybe my mind and body were now too tired to remain up. When I woke up again, it was a bright sunlight coming into my room. My Eid day was totally messed up. I had so many plans for it. My phone was beeping continuously. I got hold of it and saw so many missed calls, texts, and voice messages from Iyad.

Was I doing good? He didn't have any link to whatever had happened with my Mama and me. Yes, he was related to her murderer but having relationships in this world wasn't in human's control. As it wasn't in my power to have that man as my father. Then why should give the punishment of someone else's sins to him? He was the one who was my strength. I loved him dearly and he too hadn't given me anything less than love, respect, and regard.

But no. I straightened my back and bit my lower lip in anxiety.

I didn't want to live among these people. Marrying Iyad would make me bound to them and in this way, I had to come face to face with that man again and again. My Mama would be disappointed in me.

I quickly dialed Iyad's number which he accepted with a bell.

"Mastoorah G." He seemed quite eager when he called my name.

I would always miss the way he called me.

"Iyad, I need to meet you. Right now."

"Okay. Where should I come?"

"At Aunt Hania's place. I will be waiting for you."

I quickly declined after that. Leaving the bed, I went inside the washroom to have a bath. I wore a simple black long shirt having net embroidery on its neck, arms, and borders with black loose trousers. Wrapping my hair in a catcher, I tugged the black dupatta over my head. Iyad reached Aunt Hania's house in no time.

When I reached the garden, he was already standing there. His face lit up at my sight.

"I have something important to tell you, Iyad," I started the conversation.

"Before you make any decision, see that whatever had happened with you, I have no connection to this. Yes, your father is my Uncle but I never knew that the woman he killed was your mother. I won't be advocating in his favor, Mastoorah G. I might have a differing opinion about you as I saw his journey. My parents saw his journey and narrated it to us siblings. But you are right in your place to feel what you feel for him. I am just here to tell you that don't take any extreme decision regarding us," he explained, as a matter of fact.

I exhaled to calm myself down and folded my arms over my chest. "I know, Iyad. I am not a person who thinks that the punishment of a person's sins should be given to someone related to him. But what I am going to do is for my own sanity. I won't be able to forgive myself if I did something not expected of me from my own self."

"And what is that?" He raised a brow.

I pushed my left hand in front of my eyes. It showed my engagement ring which Aunt Ajwa had slid on my finger on the day of our engagement ceremony. I pulled it out of my ring finger and forwarded it in Iyad's direction. His eyes widened as at times he was looking at me and then the ring.

"I am really sorry, Iyad. I don't want to marry you now. In fact, I don't even want to live here anymore. I have given this a lot of thought since last night so don't think that I am doing this in impulse. My decision is firm and no one can change it now. I again apologize for being a promise-breaker but Iyad, please try to understand me," I murmured as I was already getting hurt by the way the color drained from his face.

"You can't do that Mastoorah G. We are engaged. I am your fiance. And I love you," he mumbled, feeling dejected by my words.

"For me, this engagement is no more, Iyad. I know your sincerity but please don't push me," I said, my voice becoming heavy due to tears. 

The things related to the heart would be so difficult. I never knew.

"What's my mistake in all this?"  He almost burst out.

"Then what's mine, Iyad?" I sobbed hard. "I don't want to waste your time. I wish you the best of luck in your future. May you get a girl who..."

"I don't need anyone else. I just want you as my wife. Why don't you understand, Mastoorah G?" His eyes were red with anger now. I had never seen Iyad like this.

I wiped my cheeks with the back of my hand. When he didn't take the ring from me, I plopped it on the table. "Keep this ring to yourself. I don't want to make new relations so that they will tumble under the mountains of anger. Some of these which I got were unwanted and in which there's no control of mine. But making a new one is a big no for me, Iyad."

After that, I had rushed inside by not giving him a chance to say anything further.

                      ___________________

Faris

When I reached home again, Ajwa told me that Iyad had gone to Javaria's place to meet Mastoorah as she herself called her in the morning to meet him. I wasn't seeing anything good from this. I hoped Mastoorah wouldn't break her marriage with Iyad. My son was very sensitive and he loved her very much. If this were to happen, then Iyad would be very hurt.

And what I stressed over occurred.  When Iyad was back, he seemed more dejected and indignant than before.  He had a ring in his hand which was surely Mastoorah's engagement ring.

So Mastoorah had broken their engagement.

"Iyad," Ajwa whispered, as she rushed towards him.

"What happened?" She asked as she cupped our son's face.

He showed the ring to his mother. "She broke our engagement. She said she doesn't want to marry me."

"Ya Allah." Ajwa put a hand over her mouth while my daughter's reaction was also no different than her mother's. Imad's jaw dropped upon hearing this.

"Why didn't you stop her? How can she do this?" Ajwa implored.

"She wasn't in any raw state of mind when she called me over, Mama. She knew what she was doing," Iyad murmured before he left for his room.

I looked at his back as he was striding upstairs. Ajwa and Eizal tried to follow him but I stopped both of them.

"Wait. Let him go. I'll talk to him," I confided.

Ajwa broke into tears. She placed a hand over my chest. "Faris, what is happening? I can understand Mastoorah but what's Iyad's fault in this? My son is so emotional. He didn't even raise his sentimental state in front of us. He is keeping everything to himself."

I just held her hand to comfort her. Because I myself didn't know the answer to whatever she was saying because she was one hundred percent right. 

I turned towards my daughter. "Doll, bring water for your Mama."

Faraan

I felt my whole world shattering. I didn't know that I would have to compensate for my sins like this. But I deserved it. I not only murdered an innocent woman, I also didn't even care for my baby. She was right to hate me. That was what I deserved.

After Faris was gone, I came back to the house. But for my whole walk, I felt a dull pain in my heart. My vision was turning hazy and then all of a sudden, a sour taste came in my mouth. I have a strong tendency to throw out.

"You might have completed your punishment by the laws and rules for killing my mother, but remember your punishment as far as I am concerned will never end. I will hate you till my last breath."

Mastoorah's voice reverberated in my ears which was enough to make my legs appear as jelly.

"Whenever I see you, I get a feeling of a fatherly figure. Can I call you Baba?"

"Baba..."

"You might have completed your punishment by the laws and rules for killing my mother, but remember your punishment as far as I am concerned will never end. I will hate you till my last breath."

"Don't call me your Jan. I am no one's Jaan."

"Can I call you Baba?"

"You might have completed your punishment by the laws and rules for killing my mother, but remember your punishment as far as I am concerned will never end. I will hate you till my last breath."

"Baba..."

"Don't call me your Jaan."

"Baba..."

"Baba....Baba...Baba..."

"I will hate you till my last breath."

My breath got stuck in my airways as it wasn't coming out. I started coughing hysterically. The dull pain was replaced by a sharp wave of pain in my heart and then I grabbed the left side of my chest while wailing in pain.

Not being able to hear Mastoorah's voice in my head, I closed my eyes and fell to the ground, as the intensity of pain was killing me.

"Mastoorah, meri Jaan... Don't hate your Baba, "I whispered to myself before I felt complete darkness around me.






                 ___________________

AssalamoAlaikum/ Hi guys!

How are you?

So another chapter. And maybe one of the last few chapters.

Yes, Forbidden is about to end soon..🙃❤😢

Very emotional chapter which even made me emotional too. 😢😢

One can relate to all of them. Isn't it?

Who do you relate to more?

Mastoorah, Faraan, or Iyad?

Do you think Mastoorah did right by breaking the engagement?

Should she have thought about Iyad more or was her own emotional stability important at the moment?

Please vote and comment. ❤❤

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