What the hell is happening to me? Brady asked himself for the umpteenth time.

He looked back at himself from the mirror, fingers rising only to trace his lips, then his neck, everywhere Leo had been. He still felt Leo's lips vivid as a cloudless day.

Why did you kiss him back you dimwit!
All because he'd gone and told a lie! Brady loved everybody. He didn't exactly like Alex but he didn't hate him either.

He had been petty and he knew it, Brady just wanted an excuse to check on Leo and discard of all the thoughts of him and Alex that found their way into all corners of his brain.

The truth was that he'd lost himself in the moment and his body acted on its own accord.
One minute resisting one of the hottest kisses ever and in the next, a slave he'd become, shackled and forced to attain life from it.

Brady would lose his mind if he didn't talk to someone. Jade was that person and probably the best idea he had all day.
He pulled out his phone, fingers fidgety as he dialed Jade's number. After about four rings, he picked up.

"Yeah?" Brady still couldn't figure out why Jade could never just say 'hello' like everyone else.

"Hey Jade, um... are you doing something important at the moment? I kinda need to talk to you," he played with his fingers unconsciously.

"Yeah, of course, I mean let's talk, are you alright?" Jade asked.
His relationship with Jade had progressed so much in such a short amount of time, to a point he could hear the worry in his voice at times like this.

"It's nothing big, I'm in the mood for ice cream though," Brady answered.

"Hmm, it must be big then, I'll meet you in thirty. Same place?"

"Yep, okay then," Brady hang up the phone.

Forty minutes later, Jade sat next to Brady looking out of a glass window eating ice cream. Brady had mint and chocolate scoops with way too many sprinkles, while Jade just had vanilla.

Brady stared at how pretty the ring looked around Jade's finger. Then almost immediately got disappointed in what Jade had ordered.

"Your ice cream is ever so boring," Brady told him, like he'd been telling him since they had their first ice cream together.

"My ice cream is just fine, you're just way too extra," Jade answered.

"Oh please, this isn't even my most complicated order. Besides, I really need the mint and sprinkles at the moment, but I couldn't let the chocolate go," said Brady, satisfied with his explanation.

"Which is why it must be really serious," Jade said almost nonchalantly. Had Jade always known him so well or was this just new? He couldn't tell. With Jade, you almost never could. "What the hell happened?"

Brady suddenly became shy, amusing Jade more than usual and that was saying something because Brady was really amusing. "Okay this should be interesting, spit it out," he said.

"Okay, so...I got kissed," Brady stopped  like Jade was supposed to figure out the rest, or what was so tale worthy about the kiss.

"I know the names of half the girls you've kissed, so what's the big deal?

"This was a bit different, it was by a guy," Brady then stuffed his mouth full of ice cream so he wouldn't have to say anything for a while, the mint making love to his taste buds.

"Oh," Jade said, the point seemed to hit home then. "Oh!" he said as his eyes widened.

And then just as the point dawned on him, Brady realized a storm was beginning to brew in Jade's eyes.

"Mother— who the fuck forced themselves on you?!" Jade spat, ice cream forgotten.

Brady had seen an angry Jade a handful of times, it was the scariest shit and definitely not appropriate for such a time, so he placated him.

"I kissed him back," Brady risked a brain freeze this time, putting a very large chunk of mint in his mouth.

Jade on the other hand, did a double take, "You what?!"

Brady made a show of keeping his ice cream longer in his mouth.
After what seemed like forever, he went on.

"Yeah, I also sort of let it go on," Brady tilted his head and exposed his neck, pulling down the collar of his polo shirt so that Jade would be able to see the bruised skin.

"Okay was it that intense?" Jade looked at the hickey, probably thinking about how Brady could never fail to amuse him.

"It kind of was," Brady said.

"Do you like him at least?" Jade couldn't help but ask.

"No, at least not in that way, I know I'm still straight. I just don't get why I did it, why I kissed him back. He even gave me a chance to leave, but I thought he was joking and next thing I knew..." Brady made a shrugging motion. "And to top it all off, he has a boyfriend! Does that make me a horrible person?"

"Not necessarily, he kissed you after all, does he seem like the type who would cheat on his boyfriend?"

"No," Brady thought about it. "Actually no."

"Okay, tell me about this guy."

Brady took a deep breath. "Okay, obviously I didn't know anything about him when we first met but I did notice he had these really sad eyes. Turns out he's a really cool guy, but he's so stand off-ish and never really talks about himself, I'm trying to be his friend and maybe be there for him and I get the feeling that he is really lonely although his apartment is really big but then there's the fact that he has a boyfriend who's kinda like never there, he's also really polite. And can you imagine he only has water in his-"

"Breathe Brady! Breathe," Jade told him. "I can see why you got involved with him. And just so you know, there's no boyfriend."

"What? No, I met him myself," Brady countered.

"I've lived a really wild life Brady, trust me, I know these things," Jade told him.

Brady still didn't look convinced but he let it go. "Do you think I should apologize?"

"What for?"

"I led him on, then left him there, you know, aroused-"

"Oh Brady! You—"

                  ___________________

It was beautiful weather, only a tad bit cloudy and a little wind that blew the little bit of red at the corner of his eye.

The red scarf disappeared behind a big tree, where he knew she'd be waiting for him. Leo followed the sound of her laughter to it. That soft, beautiful sound.

He reached it in no time but who he found there was not Lisa, it was Brady.  He opened his mouth to speak but closed it right back as a stinging pain flooded his cheek. Brady slapped him hard. "Go to her," he said, pointing to nothing.

Leo walked anyway, and suddenly there was Lisa, smiling at him with open arms.
When he was finally in her embrace, he relaxed. Like he'd been dying to do so for ages and the moment was finally here.

"Leo," she said but he didn't respond, only relaxed further. "I don't love you anymore, she said and he panicked.

Leo's panic woke him up, a slight tremor passing through his body and only relaxing when he realized that he was besides himself in the big room. "I'm so sick of this," he said.

He knew he wouldn't be able to go back to sleep. The arms of Morpheus already a long way off. It was always the same way. His throat felt parched. He needed water so he threw the covers back and got up.

First it was the water, then the night sky, the fucked up routine that was slowly becoming a ritual.

With bare feet and an aching heart, Leo stepped out onto his balcony.

________________________________

How are y'all doing?

How do you like this chapter or what do think?

I hope you understand a little more of what keeps Leo up at night.

Thank you always❤