It's been two months since the class found out and yet no one outside of them knows yet.

Bakugo is barely scraping by, really.

The closer it gets to the anniversary of her death, the worse he feels himself getting. He's tired. It feels like hell every time he opens his eyes in the morning and gets worse after every breath he takes.

And as he watches his dad's contact on his phone screen, all he can think is that he wants to go back to sleep.

But it's a Wednesday morning and he has to get to class in ten minutes, so he sits there, staring at his phone as he thinks about absolutely nothing. He feels the pit in his chest and tastes the sourness in his mouth that comes in the morning.

He hears the birds as it's started to get slightly warmer and sees the light peeking through the cracks in his curtains.

Then he hears knocking at his door and sees his phone lighting up again, but with a different contact this time. It's Kirishima who's calling and Shinso and Shoto are at his door.

Bakugo just stares.

His eyes feel beyond just heavy and his shoulders ache. The pain that comes with his stress feels sharp in his arms, which he's lacked to take care of again. The knocking at his door turns into banging and now people are shouting.

He hears it all, but it's muffled. It sounds too far away for him to care.

It feels like an eternity later, but it's probably only a few seconds before his door is kicked open, Kirishima standing in his hardened form before he goes back to normal and rushes in with everyone else.

Suddenly there are hands on his face and there are so many people around him. He didn't even get a chance to blink before everyone was next to him.

He sees Kaminari's worried face and Shoto's warm eyes and he knows he's going to be okay. He will be, but right now he's not.

That's okay, too.

At least, that's what everyone tells him. He doesn't feel like it's okay, though. It feels wrong for him to not be okay. Like if he's breaking an important cosmic rule that determines his fate.

It's dramatic, but it feels like the truth.

There's some talking and Shoto tries to get him to snap out of whatever he's in by shaking his hand slightly and when that doesn't work, he puts his right hand on his neck.

A dull, cold feeling shoots through him, but he just stays there, staring.

He misses his mom, he realizes.

She was always so amazing to him.

The hands on his face returns, but this time they swipe at his cheeks.

Oh.

He's crying.

There's movement again, a flash of blond appearing and disappearing from his sight. Then red and purple go too before he's met with the face of his teacher. The man's lips are moving, but Bakugo has no clue what he's saying.

When Aizawa pulls one of his arms towards him, and pushes back his sleeves, Bakugo realizes he has his uniform on.

Did he already change for class?

He can't remember doing that.

It doesn't really matter. All he knows is that he should get to class. So he breathes slightly deeper than before and stands up, ignoring everyone as they seem to be shocked still.

He grabs his bag that's right next to his broken door and makes his way to leave.

Wait, he needs his shoes, he remembers.

So he looks around only to realize that he has them on.

Convenient.

Just before he continues walking, a hand on his shoulder stops him. His teacher is back in sight and he's also worried. At least, Bakugo thinks so. It's hard to tell with Aizawa.

All of a sudden he's in Recovery Girl's office.

Again?

He was just here yesterday after Kirishima punched him in the face and he had to stay in the office a little longer.

Wasn't he?

When he looks down, he sees that he's still in his school uniform.

Guess not.

Maybe he still has that concussion?

He falls asleep after, barely paying any mind to the woman standing next to his bed, trying to check his vitals. He's too tired to care.

~~~~~

"Bakugo?"

His eyes open suddenly as he's pulled out of sleep.

Exhaustion weighs heavy as he's met with reality.

He sees someone standing next to his bed so he turns, remembering that he's in Recovery Girl's office and not in his room. Which makes sense, really, because why would the lights be so insanely bright?

It's unreal how bright these lights are.

"Bakugo, can you hear me?" Aizawa stands there, scarf covering the lower part of his face.

The blond just nods, unable to get himself to speak.

Why did he wake him up? All he wants to do is sleep. That's what you're supposed to do when you're tired.

It feels like he's here constantly recently. The day before yesterday Deku knocked the shit out of him because Bakugo's been falling behind physically. It's hard to keep up in a class full of gym bros when you're finding it hard to eat and work out outside of classes.

"Hey, you okay?"

Bakugo just shakes his head and looks away, feeling horrible.

"Your dad was calling you, are you on speaking terms?"

He sounds hesitant to bring it up, judging by the pain that grows in his chest, Bakugo guesses that's probably why.

"No."

His tone is more solid than he expected.

"I need to contact him," he says, making dread build up in the blond. He knew this was coming. Aizawa had already given him a sort of heads up earlier that month that if anything else happened, he'd have to get his dad involved.

Tears stream down his face. He knows his dad will be disappointed and probably mad about this. He can't do a single thing right. He's here trying to be a hero for the reason that he knows he has work to do in order to make his parents proud, and he can't even get to class.

"You're not in trouble, Bakugo. I'm not trying to punish you. Clearly, therapy with Hound Dog isn't working anymore. We need to start looking at other options," he explains, "and since I'm not the one getting information on your therapy, your dad needs to come in and be the one to make these decisions."

It feels like a punishment.

Just because he's hit a rough patch, doesn't mean he wasn't getting better. It's just been a little hard recently.

"I'm trying," he admits, wanting the man to know that it's not for his lack of trying that he's here, "I'm doing the breathing exercises, journaling, and I even let the class do shit for me when I need it. I'm trying."

The man is silent before Bakugo turns to look at him, wondering why he's doing this.

"I know. You're doing great at that, Bakugo, but it's clear that, at least for the moment, you need someone who specializes in grief counseling to help you."

A surge of pride fills his chest briefly at the compliment, but the rest of his words squash it all back down.

"This is to help you. You're still allowed to go to class, just please let me talk to your dad about setting up a meeting with a grief counselor. You won't fall behind, I'll make sure of it."

Most of the blond's anxiety vanishes with the words, but he still feels a little doubt.

"You're not mad?"

Aizawa furrows his brows, "Mad?"

He's not mad.

"That I'm not okay."

The man blinks, slightly aggravated.

"Of course I'm not mad," he says comfortingly before his tone takes on a more tense tone, "Is your dad mad?"

Guilt. Guilt. Guilt.

"Yeah."

Guilt.

"Bakugo, that's not right."

Guilt.

He shouldn't be throwing his dad under the bus like this.

Guilt.

But it's not his fault that he's not okay.

"I know," he whispers. The guilt disappears as he says it out loud. He knows it's not right.

Aizawa just nods, "Would you like me to regain partial guardianship to take over your therapy stuff?"

Bakugo just nods, knowing that it would be best. If he wants to get better, he has to be a little selfish. It's okay to be selfish. That's what everyone tells him, so he knows it's fine. He gets to be when it comes to his health.

Even if his dad is mad at him, which he hates, he knows that it's not his fault.

"Okay, I'll call him to the school so I can talk to him. Would you like to speak to him, too?"

The blond nods.

After that, Aizawa lets him go back to sleep, only for him to be woken up not even an hour later when his dad gets there.

The man is standing on the side of the bed, looking over him with a worried look in his eye. At the sight of Masaru, he's sitting up and waking up instantly.

When Bakugo looks around, he sees Aizawa standing by the door.

"I'll be right outside."

"Okay," he answers.

When the teacher is out of the room, Masaru sits on the chair next to his bed.

"Did Aizawa talk to you yet?"

"No," Masaru says and grabs his son's hand, looking distressed.

"I know I haven't reached out. I'm sorry. I've been so horrible to you. Placing blame on you when you didn't deserve it, getting angry at you, making you deal with things on your own," he trails off, "You're just a kid, Katsuki."

Bakugo feels himself start to frown as he tries his hardest to stop himself from crying. Hearing the words from his dad and how he believes that it's not his fault means the world to him. After a deep breath, still fighting the urge to cry, Bakugo asks his dad the question he's been meaning to ask in this whole time since his dad first told him.

"Did you really hate me?"

Masaru leans forward, absolutely distraught by the sight of his devastated son. "No," he breathes, shaking his head, "I didn't. I'm sorry, Katsuki. I'm so sorry."

The man is crying now, taking off his glasses to wipe away the tears, before shaking his head and opening his mouth to speak again, "What I said to you was horrible. I don't deserve your forgiveness so I won't ask for it yet, but I'm going to work on earning it. I've been doing therapy and it's opened my eyes to my inexcusable treatment towards you. My son, I'm so sorry."

My son has Bakugo hiding his face in his hands and sobbing, unable to get himself to stop.

His dad is then pulling him to his chest, finally giving him the hug he's been needing. It feels right. He missed his dad so damn much and it hurts to think about the treatment he got from him.

He's scared it'll happen again.

"It's okay, Katsuki. Let it out," the man encourages, aware of how hard Bakugo is trying to get himself to stop crying.

There's a knock on the door, and Bakugo is forced to pull himself together, wiping his face to try to make himself more presentable as his dad pulls away and in walks Aizawa, looking over at Bakugo.

When Bakugo looks up, he sees the man giving his dad a look.

"It's fine, he just apologized."

Still, Aizawa seems wary.

"Do you still want me to take guardianship?" Aizawa asks, looking at him with a serious look in his eye. Letting him know that if he still wants him to take guardianship, then he'll speak to his dad.

Right now, he's not sure that his dad can be there for his therapy shit. He's doing his own healing and it's obviously working for him. This is the first time that Katsuki hasn't smelled alcohol on him in months.

"Yeah," he nods, before looking over to his dad who seems confused, "just because I know you're doing good right now with your own shit. I don't want to take that away from you and have you focus on me. I think Aizawa should do this."

When he looks back to his teacher, the man nods and faces his dad.

"If you could follow me to my office so we can talk," he prompts before walking away, Masaru following closely behind.

Before the door fully closes behind them, it's pushed open to reveal Recovery Girl, walking in with the tapping of her little cane with her. She looks chipper for some reason, and her mood only improves when she sees Bakugo sitting up.

"Bakugo! How lovely to see you awake. How are you feeling young man?" She asks, walking up to his bed and smiling at him.

It still feels like the end of the world, really, but with his dad apologizing like that and actually meaning it and then Aizawa being so helpful makes him realize that maybe it's not the end of the world.

"I don't know."

That's what he settles for because he's not really sure.

He's overjoyed to have his dad apologize like that and explain to him that Bakugo is not at fault for anything, but it feels like whiplash. Just yesterday he was convinced his dad hated his guts and doesn't want anything to do with him and his failure at everything.

"Well, that's fine, too. What are you hungry for? I can get Lunch Rush to make you whatever you want before lunch in thirty minutes."

His mom's mapo tofu comes to mind and he has to suppress the emotion building up.

No. Not that.

"Um, I guess tai sushi sounds good."

She laughs shaking her head, "You rich kids."

He didn't think it was that ridiculous to ask for, but maybe it was a little on the pricier side for a school. Even for UA, he guesses.

She walks over to the phone on her desk, presses a few buttons and starts talking to lunch rush over the phone. As she speaks to the man, Bakugo is hit with the fact that this is the first time he's been hungry for a while. He could eat five sushi rolls if they brought him that much food, really.

"Bakugo?" Recovery Girl calls, getting his attention, "Want any vegetables or dumplings on the side?"

"Spring rolls," he answers.

She nods, turning away from him and speaking into the phone once more.

He's not really sure what she's saying to the man, but he doesn't really care. He's too caught up in his thoughts to care. Like what's going on with his dad and Aizawa? He knows Aizawa has some beef with his dad. Especially after how his dad has been acting towards him up until today.

Today was weird, but damn is Bakugo happy that his dad is speaking to him again.

Of course, he doesn't forgive him. He can't. It hurt too much to just get over with a hug and an apology, but if he means it and actually proves it, Bakugo could get his dad back.

Honestly, he thought it was over for their relationship after that last time, so this is the best thing he could have ever asked for. He can't wait to tell Shoto when he sees him after classes end. Actually, Shoto might not be too convinced. Maybe he'd be happy for the blond, but he's not sure Shoto will suddenly start liking Masaru either.

But that's fine. In time, it'll be fine.

Recovery Girl is by his bed again, and he looks at her.

"What time is it?"

She checks the watch on her wrist before raising an eyebrow at him.

"Twenty before lunch. Would you like your phone?" She asks, already knowing he probably wants to talk to Halfie.

"Yeah," he answers, eager to talk to the taller teen.

When he gets his phone from the woman, he freezes, realizing that most, if not all, his friends saw him have that weird freak out.

He doesn't really remember who he saw. He only remembers colors so Shinso, Kaminari, and Kirishima were definitely there. Oh shit, his door is broken because Kirishima kicked that fucker down.

"Thinking too hard will give you a headache, young man."

Bakugo scoffs, waving her off.

"Tch, don't scoff at me. In this state, you're prone to headaches, I'm just trying to help you out. Jeez, I tell you these days kids have no respect," she says, muttering the last part mostly to herself.

Since she's basically right next to him, he hears everything and glares at her before he's typing away on his phone, seeing all the missed calls and messages from his friends and boyfriend. He clicks on Shoto's first, letting him know he's okay and thanking him for everything before he's texting his friends.

At least, he only texts the ones who he knows were there for sure. If he's missing anyone, he'll just have Halfie tell him later.

He feels slightly more aware, but there's still that fog making everything seem fake and far away.

After ten minutes, the phone in Recovery Girl's office goes off and she's immediately answering it. Guessing from her answers, it's Lunch Rush.

Just a few seconds later, she's hung up the phone and spun her chair to face him.

"Lunch Rush is on his way with your food. You're a lucky young man having him cater your food to you."

He doesn't feel that lucky. His mom is dead after all. He'd take her being alive over anything else in the world, but whatever. He's supposedly really lucky just because of that shit.

Bakugo sighs, nodding in acknowledgment.

"Bakugo?"

The blond looks towards the woman.

"You're an incredible young man. I'm sure that you're making your parents more than proud just by being yourself."

Getting choked up, he looks away, shrugging at her words to which the woman sighs.

"Believe it or not, but I think that's the truth. You've accomplished and persevered through many hardships. I think that's commendable on its own. That's without taking into account all the amazing things you do."

Unable to speak, he just shakes his head, not really sure what he would say honestly.

And before he can even say anything else, Lunch Rush is walking in with his food, giving it to him, and leaving without anything else other than a quick 'enjoy' from the man.

It smells amazing, really.

He immediately digs in, finally feeling the hunger that he's been lacking.

***
Word Count: 3123
Y'all it's rough out here. I went to the ER earlier this week. I think it was Tuesday night. It was my first ever trip to the ER. I had severe heartburn lolll. Yeah so on Saturday night going into Sunday, I was at work and started feeling pain in my back which I thought was weird just because of where it hurt. I usually have back pain but never like that. Then on the walk home I started feeling pain in my abdomen. Like upper stomach. It wasn't too bad and I knew it was heartburn so I just took and anti acid pill and called it a night.  It even an hour later I wake up in excruciating pain like it hurts so bad. I get up and sit on the restroom floor for a while cause I felt like throwing up. I was dizzy and felt so weak it was so bad. I stayed up for like three hours just in the restroom willing away the pain. It Didn't work, called my mom, she said to order some pills from cvs and a sprite. I order the stuff and the pills don't work but chugging the sprite makes me burp so boom no more excruciating pain. Hooray I go to sleep. The next two night are fine. Then Tuesday night I wake up at three am dying again and I knew what to do. So I take the pills from cvs and chug some sprite. DOESNT WORK. I'm DYING. I call a nearby hospital to see if they can help with severe heartburn they tell me yes so I get an uber there. I don't leave the ER till 9 am and they told me I got h pylori. It's a bacterial infection and I could've gotten it from water or food and one of the symptoms is severe heartburn. Great!! They prescribed me pills for a months and now I'm on a diet of white meats, oats, and greens lol. Basically can't eat shit for AT LEAST a month 😛😛 anyway it's been a couple nights since then and I haven't had heartburn since BUT I've been so cautious so hopefully I don't get heartburn like that again. Every night I'm so nervous to go to sleep because I don't want to wake up dying of pain again. Anyway rant over mb I'm just not doing well LOL plus classes started and I'm overwhelmed with work too HAHAHAHAH okay anyway I hope y'all liked this chapter. I'm gonna post on Fridays now cause I think that'll be better for me idk sorry gang. Uhh fic ends soon. 44 chapters with an epilogue. Next chapter goes up next Friday at 11:30 pm central time around 3000-6000 words. I love you all, thanks for putting up with my BS, and tysm for reading <3