"Bakugo, you're not gonna regret coming to laser tag with us," Kaminari says as Bakugo makes dinner.

He's making Kaminari's pick for dinner. He'd chosen fucking spaghetti of all things, so he's almost done. Today was a good day, so he decided to make something easy. The hyper blond wanted to accompany Bakugo while he did, so Bakugo is stuck with him now.

"Yeah? Why's that?" Bakugo's responds dryly.

Kaminari gets hyped the fuck up or something because he starts talking excitedly about how he misses hanging out with him since he's so competitive and makes this fun.

"And yeah you have an attitude and you've been weird lately, but I always have the best time when you're around, man. This is gonna be so epic," he practically yells.

He knew that Kirishima liked his presence at least somewhat, but he didn't know Kaminari liked having him around, too. Especially not to this level. It kind of makes Bakugo happy, but then guilty knowing he's going to cancel.

"Fuck you," Bakugo replies, referring to the bad attitude part.

"No, but for real, man, what's up? You've been- like-" he pauses, unsure of how to word it, "you've been pulling away from the group or something."

Bakugo has to stop himself from freezing or physically reacting because he knew that everyone noticed he was withdrawing into himself, but he didn't think anyone would be brave enough to ask him about it.

Instead he just shrugs.

"I know that Mina and Sero are probably not helping you want to become close to the group again, but I've been talking to them. I'm sure they'll give up with their shit pretty soon. Actually, Sero did give you that strawberry milk yesterday randomly. Was that him apologizing?"

At this point, Kaminari is just wondering out loud.

"It was kind of a crappy apology, so I don't blame you for throwing the milk away in front of him, that was badass. This is why you're the coolest, Bakugo," he beams.

Bakugo turns from where he was at the stove to stir the noodles.

"Are you sucking up to me or something? You want the answers to the homework or want me to help you cheat on an exam? What's with the ass kissing?"

Kaminari stares, dumbfounded.

"Uh, what? It's nothing like that, dude, you're just cool. Sorry if it seemed like I wanted something," Kaminari replies, backing off and unsure about why Bakugo would think he just wanted something from him.

Now it's Bakugo's turn to look dumbfounded.

Kaminari had no reason to just come up to him and compliment the fuck out of him and say how much fun he has with him. It seemed like he had an ulterior motive.

Why else would he be nice to Bakugo who's been such an asshole to him?

"No it's whatever, just- the food is done. Serve yourself," he decides, leaving the kitchen and forgoing eating for the third time this week.

He's got to stop doing that if he wants to stay healthy, but he'll sneak down later to get something in his system.

For now he has a bag of some random peanut mix and a couple of protein bars in his room that he can snack on while he waits everybody out to get some real food.

He hears his name being called by Kaminari at his sudden exit, but he ignores it in favor of being alone.

Once he presses the elevator button, he steps back, waiting for the doors to open, but after five seconds, he becomes impatient and decides to take the stairs.

Better for him since he won't bump into anyone on the stairs.

A buzz from his phone makes him pull out the device only to be met with words he's seen too many times before.

Pinky has removed you from a group chat.

Rock Man has added you to a group chat.

He rolls his eyes, already forgetting the group chat stuff.

He wonders why Kaminari was being so nice to him. Sure, Kaminari is just a charismatic guy, but to just bombard Bakugo with all those praises and excitement about his presence is just off.

It seems wrong and Bakugo has no idea why the other blond just- ugh whatever.

He's making a bigger deal out of it than necessary.

Kaminari is just nice.

He takes his key out to unlock his dorm door, but as he looks at the piece of metal in his hand, he accidentally bumps into a solid body.

"Fucking shit," he curses, walking backwards and looking up to see that it's fucking shitty hair.

"Sorry man. You good?"

Bakugo glares.

"Foods fucking done. Go get some," is all he says as he passes the other, just trying to find some peace.

"Hell yeah," the red head exclaims, but then he turns to Bakugo and right before the blond steps into his room, he turns to him.

"What?" He asks, wondering why Kirishima is just staring.

"You're not eating?"

Bakugo sighs, knowing he should eat, but it's hard to go through the motions. "I ate too much at lunch. If I'm hungry, I'll go down later."

With that, he just enters his room and doesn't give Kirishima any time to question him further.

It's kind of weird to just isolate himself completely. Although he grew up without siblings and parents that traveled constantly with work, being alone was never an issue. He learned how to adapt, but this year at UA, he actually got used to interacting with these idiots and moving into the dorms just made it even easier to get used to.

Now that he's been removing himself from the group more often, he feels a little like he's asking for attention.

It's ridiculous because the last thing he wants is attention right now, but he can't help but feel like he's making a whole show out of it. It's obvious he's been acting a little different, but his friends don't suspect that it's grief.

They don't suspect that it's because the most important person in the world to him had died and he's having a hard time.

They just think he's being secretive and annoying.

Technically he is, though.

~~~~~

When he wakes up the next day, it's late and he has to rush to get ready, practically running to class to make it on time.

He barely has time to check his phone, just glancing at the time and seeing a whole bunch of notifications on there, but not being able to really pay attention to any of them.

The bell rings as soon as he's seated and he has to pretend like everything is fine.

He knows his shirt is all wrinkled and that his hair is probably a mess.

The day passes quickly. He barely had any time to process first period by the time he's walking back to the dorms.

Lunch was spent wandering the halls in a section of the school that none of his classmates would go to, and now it's dinner time.

He makes another meal from the list that's easy to make.

Nothing is as simple as spaghetti, so he decides that today he'll 'make' his own pick: leftovers.

As soon as he's upstairs, he messages Iida to tell the class that tonight they can eat leftovers or make something themselves.

Then he changes and quickly gets to studying because today he was not paying attention in class at all, and although he's usually ahead of the class, he wants to make sure to go over the content of this week one more time just to be sure.

He doesn't notice when it gets dark because his curtains are always closed and he just had his desk lamp on.

A knocking on his door snaps him out of his studies, and he jumps, back aching at the stretch of sitting up right.

"Bakugo?"

He doesn't feel like figuring out who it is, so he just walks over to the door, eyes heavy and fingers aching, head full of new information.

Once the door is open, the light from the hall breaches the darkness that is his room and he squints, trying to adjust. Sure, he had his desk lamp on, but that was aimed at the workbooks and papers he had on the desk. On top of that, the brightness had nothing compared to the hallway.

It takes him a while to adjust, but as soon as he does, he sees Kaminari standing there with a plate and a bottle of water.

"Dunce Face?"

The usually hyper blond smiles, waving the water bottle in his face.

"Hey, man. I noticed you came straight up here after class, and you said it's leftover night, but you didn't really come back down. Like at all," he laughs, "so I decided to make you something. You do it for us every day and I don't think anyone has ever, uh, done anything for you, so- can I come in?"

Is that why he's being all nice?

He wants something from Bakugo?

His brain is too tired to actually care or try to be offended, so he just lets the other blond in, opening the door wider and allowing Kaminari to step foot in his room.

For some reason, he decides that he should gain consciousness, and when he does, he's suddenly aware that his room could be dirty.

Spinning around quickly, he finds that the only mess in the room is his bed, which has his sheets all crumpled along with his school uniform thrown over it, and also his desk which is littered with notes, pencils, pens, and workbooks.

Okay, not too bad.

"What the fuck are you bothering me for?" Bakugo asks, suddenly curious at Kaminari's presence.

"I just told you, dude, but the reason I wanted to come in is cause you don't look too good, man."

Bakugo glares at him before going over to his desk to clean up his mess while Kaminari just sits on his bed, still holding the water and plate of food.

Once his desk is clean, Bakugo takes the plate from Kaminari and sets it on there.

"Are you gonna eat or?" Kaminari asks, not really finishing his question.

Just then, he notices how dark it is inside the room.

Fuck, he's a mess right now.

He turns on the light, feeling like he's going in circles as he tries to function like a normal human being.

"So you brought me food cause- why?" He asks, not understanding or really remembering what Kaminari had said.

"I didn't think you'd ever go down to eat and since you're always making food for the class but no one's ever done the same for you, I thought I could be the first, so I made your favorite," he shrugs, looking embarrassed now instead of proud.

"My favorite?" Bakugo mumbles under his breath, looking at the plate.

Mapo Tofu.

Kaminari made him mapo tofu just because no one else had made him food before.

He has to keep looking away from Kaminari so that the other teen doesn't notice the tears that are welling up in his eyes, chest tight with emotion.

His mom made him mapo tofu all the time and before this, she was the last one to make him his favorite.

He hadn't eaten any since then.

"Is that not your favorite?" Kaminari asks curiously. "Shit, that's what Midoriya said it was when I asked him. Did it change?" He gets up and looks at Bakugo.

That's when he snaps out of it, clearing his throats and nodding. "Yeah, that's my favorite. Thanks or whatever."

Kaminari sighs in relief, body sagging.

"Oh good. Well, are you doing alright?"

Now that the tears have definitely gone away, Bakugo looks at Kaminari and answers him. "Yeah, I don't know why I wouldn't be. Why are you fucking asking?"

Kaminari frowns, shaking his head.

"For starters, this whole interaction right now is totally off. You're like- being all spacy. There's also how you've been acting the last few months. It's not cool to just shut us out. I get it if sometimes you want your space, but the way you've completely just avoided us sometimes makes the group feel bad. Maybe that's just the way you are, but if there's something wrong, you can tell me at least," he shrugs, offering him his trust.

"I know you think I may be a blabber mouth, but I've kept the most important secrets for some people in the class. It might not be much, but I'd never ever expose you."

Bakugo wants to be able to.

Wants to just fall apart and stop holding himself up with everything he has.

He wants to be able to just grieve openly and talk about how much it hurts now that his mom is dead and he won't ever be able to see her again.

They'll never have another fight.

She'll never tell him that she's proud of him.

Never ruffle his hair when he's making breakfast.

He'll never have her Mapo Tofu.

Bakugo will never see her wrapped in her blanket having a cup of coffee in the morning.

She'll never ask him to join her.

But he can't let himself be so vulnerable in front of someone. The moment he starts caring so much, they could be ripped away from him and he'll never see them again, either.

And that's such a scary fucking fact.

Any one of these idiots could just be killed at any point in time and Bakugo can't afford to care because he really won't be able to live through that.

He really won't make it.

So Bakugo shakes his head at the other blond, switching up his civil way of speaking and instead, answering him dryly. "There's nothing, dumbass. Just leave me alone and get out."

It hurts to push them away because, yeah, he started liking this group of idiots. It hurts, but it's what's best.

Kaminari's face falls and he looks sad. Sad in a way that shouldn't be seen on Kaminari.

"Bakugo don't do this," the other blond pleads, wishing to just understand Bakugo.

Again, Bakugo shakes his head.

"Thanks for the food, but you need to leave. I'm not doing this."

Bakugo's says it in a way that makes it final. No room for discussion or debate. He knows Kaminari just wants to end this on good terms, and if he's being honest, Bakugo does, too. If he does that, though, Kaminari will think it's okay to come up to him tomorrow or something and that's not what Bakugo needs.

It's what he wants, but he's doing this for his own well being.

Kaminari stands up, putting the water bottle on the desk and making his way to the door. Before he leaves, he turns to Bakugo.

"I hope this is just a rough patch for you and you'll be talking to us again, soon. Maybe tomorrow will bring your mood up. Don't forget to take care of yourself, man. I'll see you tomorrow."

When he leaves, Bakugo stares at the closed door, sad about this whole thing. He hates hurting his friends. Especially when they've always been nice and are the first real friends he's ever had.

"I need to stop caring," he whispers to himself, going to turn off the light and lock the door before climbing into bed and pulling the covers over himself.

He stares up at the plate and water bottle on his desk, but feels guilty, so he turns around, hoping sleep comes easy.

It doesn't.

***
Word Count: 2608
Hey yall I hope you liked this chapter. If yall have watched the umbrella academy can you rank the members from your favorite to least favorite 1-7. I just wanna see who likes who LMAO anyway the next chapter will go up next Sunday at 8pm central time. I love you all and tysm for reading <3