**

"I know you're still hurting after what happened to your mom but that's like eight years ago and I understand if you can't let go of her memory but think about this; if your Lucy was alive and here with us right now. Don't you think she would have loved for you to celebrate with your friends rather than outrightly saying no?"

If mom was here. I know she'd be the first to whisper happy birthday to me as she kisses me out of my slumber but she is gone now and it's doesn't matter anymore.

I blink back a tear as my hand slipped out of his. I took a deep breath as I leaned back against the chair.

My birthday stopped being just my birthday long ago cos it's also her death anniversary and its hurt to remember her this way.

I fucking hate it...

"You're right dad. Mom would have loved for me to celebrate but she is dead now so it's my decision not to celebrate don't you think?"

His expression became solemn  at my word as he stared at me. Eyes wide. He sure wasn't expecting that comeback but that's how it gonna be until I can find a way to suck it up.

"You can't keep living like this Katherine..." shaking his head as he stared at me.

"....to think that I brought you here because I was hoping a new environment would do you some good only to have you still wallowing deep in your grief is just insane and you know it" his voice harsh.

No I don't know any damn thing so tell me about it.

I can't believe my dad is talking about grief with me when he is so good at hiding his. I'm not the one burying myself deep in my work like a freaking workaholic. not to mention the fact that he doesn't have a girlfriend even after eight years and to think that he will be fifty in a month is not a typical example of someone  lecturing his daughter about not wallowing in the memory of his dead mom.

"Dad please! Can we not push this any further?"

"Not until you promise to give it a positive thought" he insisted.

"Alright fine. I will think about it. Now can we just drop it?" My hand balled into a tight fist

His hand found mine again in a swift move as he squeeze at it gently.

"Will you really give it a thought?"

It sounded surreal even to my dad. I can't believe I said yes myself.

"Yes!" My voice barely audible.

"Aunt Nene will make all the arrangement you will be needing" he added with a beam

Aunt Nene right? How can I forget about her. She is the closet thing I have to calling a mom so if given the chance. I bet she'd fill the gap perfectly.

"Okay then. I will have the birthday but I won't be needing a cake" I said.

"Why?"

I shrugged.

"Just don't want one"

He thought about it for a while and agreed anyways.

"As you wish kitty. As long as you are celebrating then it's good enough for me" he smiled

After eight years of holding solemnly to my decision not to remember what it all felt like. I finally said yes and as easy as that sounds, my chest was silently beating with an uneasy pace. I feel all nervous thinking about it.

Gosh...

Is it too late to change my mind perhaps?

A/N

This is not exactly a chapter cos it's more like a filler for the previous one....hope it's not that bad cos i was having a major author's block while writing this chapter..please do let me know if it turned out right or not😃