I can't stop the damn tears from flowing even after I showered. I hate that I cry when I'm angry, it makes me feel weak.

I get dressed quickly and french braid my hair, not wanting it down or in my face today. I expected to find JP still in my room, but he wasn't. His shirt is gone from the floor, and my bed is made.

I check my phone, thinking maybe he left me a text message, but then I remember he doesn't have my new number.

It's nearly lunchtime, and I head to the kitchen to grab something to eat. Carmela is in there, as usual, prepping for lunch. She looks up from cutting vegetables as I walk in.

"You give us scare this morning, dolcezza. John Paul running around like a madman, he ordered men check grounds for you. Where you run off to, cara?"

I sigh heavily and sit at the counter. "I slept in my dad's old room last night."

"Perche?" (Why?)

"Because I was mad at JP... He came home drunk, stumbling in my room. He scared me; I could have shot him, Carmela. And then he wanted to...to be intimate, but he was so drunk. I didn't want my first time to feel like I was with a stranger.

But the worst part was when his phone buzzed, and it was from a woman, Victoria. He went out with her last night, apparently." I start to tear up and push my hands up against my eyes, not wanting them to fall.

Carmela wraps her arms around me, and I cry onto her shoulder. "No excuse, his behavior, mi amore. I disappointed in his choices. But he loves you; he always has, cara. He feel badly on his own for what he did.

Don't let moment of misunderstanding, poison what you are—make you forget all lovely moments together." She rubs my arms soothingly. "You strong and I proud you tell him how you feel when you feel it. He will listen."

I smile at her. "Thank you, Carmela." She hugs me tightly again and goes back to cutting vegetables. "Can I help you?" I ask. She nods and pulls out another cutting board, and has me cut some meat. I sort of expected and hoped JP would have wandered in during lunch, but he didn't.

My mind starts racing, and then I start to second guess myself; maybe I overreacted? Maybe I need to apologize to him? I'm wandering back downstairs when my Uncle walks in the front door.

"Charmaine, can you come to my office, please?" I nod and follow him silently down the hall. He waits for me to go in first, then follows, closing the door.

I sit on the leather couch, and he sits in the chair next to it. "Is everything okay with you and John Paul?"

I play with the hem of my sweatshirt. Not sure how to answer his question.

"I know it's none of my business, but I know how he feels about you, and I see how you are around him too. So it's only natural that something other than friendship would develop between you too.

I had a feeling something would happen sooner or later between you two. But...adding physical intimacy to the equation... can sometimes complicate things."

I look up at him quickly, hoping he's not seriously going to have "the talk" with me. I can see he's fighting to look composed, but he seems just as uncomfortable as I do.

"No, Uncle, we haven't—well, I mean we have—but...we haven't...we haven't had sex!" I blurt out, and his eyes widen at my honesty.

I sink into the couch as far as I can make myself go, not looking at him. Then, finally, I hear him clear his throat, and he takes a deep breath.

"Well...good to know. It's sometimes...best to wait—to be sure and make sure you're...safe." He clears his throat again as he adjusts his position in the chair. "So, why did you sleep in Dominic's room?"

I recount last night's events but leave out the part of JP trying to force himself on me. I might be mad at him, but I don't want JP to get murdered. My Uncle sighs and commends me for removing myself from the room when JP was so intoxicated.

"You should know, though, he did want to come back early and to be with you. A few of the business associates gave him a hard time for wanting to return to you instead of going out for a drink, but I admit we got carried away. If it weren't for Tony being sober to drive us home, we probably would have stayed in the city." He tells me.

That still doesn't explain how Victoria was involved, I think to myself, bitterly.

My Uncle proceeds to advise me on how important communication is in any relationship and give JP a chance to explain his side of things. I thank him and make my way out of his office.

My head hurts from all the discussions and thinking. I know both Carmela and my Uncle mean well, and they are probably right on me hearing JP out, but I can't face him yet.

He knows how I feel about Victoria, and for all I know, she probably came on to him again or worse...

I walk into my room and call Annalisa, and she answers on the third ring, and I tell her about the events of early this morning. She was already planning on coming over to get ready together, but now she wants to come over sooner.

When she arrives, she comes with her dress in hand and her makeup bag. While Annalisa's changing, Carmela knocks on my bedroom door, bringing in the dress my Uncle ordered.

It's a black Alexander Halter backless, satin dress with a high slit. Annalisa comments on my dress when I put it on, saying JP will be shitting himself when he sees me.

"I still can't believe he went out with that bitch. What was he thinking?" She asks, as does my makeup. She adds a winged line to my eyes, and I like the look of it and consider doing it more often. I'm also wearing a bold red lip color. My hair is pulled back tight in a low side bun, with a red flower pinned to it.

"Your guess is as good as mine," I tell her sadly.

"Hey, don't let this bring you down, Char. We're going to this benefit, and we are going to dance our asses off and have a few drinks, and it's all for a good cause!"

I laugh at her attempt to cheer me up.

Once we are finished, we slip on the masks and head out the door. A large group of my Uncle's men is gathered in the foyer of the house. They all look up as we make our way down.

My eyes are immediately drawn to JP. His heated gaze moves down my dress, focusing on the high slit on my left side.

He's wearing a dark charcoal Armani suit, and damn him, if he didn't wear it well. The watch on his hand shines under the lights in the lobby. His dark hair is styled messily, and I desperately want to run my fingers through it.

My heart pounds crazily as he walks over to me, but Annalisa moves in front of me, blocking him. "I warned you, John Paul, I guess you wanted to see if I'd make good on it," Annalisa tells him. "The kitchens not far, and I'd be happy to prove myself to you."

"Now, now, no one would like to see you covered in JP's blood, especially in that dress, doll face. But if that's what it takes to get you out of it. I might be tempted to let you hurt him." Joey tells her as he takes in the gold slip dress she has on. She rolls her eyes at him and starts to lead us towards the door.

"Charmaine, please. I need to talk to you." JP pleads. I stop, and Annalisa stops with me as I turn to look at JP.

"Fine, go ahead. Say what you need to say."

"In private."

"No. Whatever you have to say, you can say it here or not at all." I say as I cross my arms.

He looks at me for a long moment. His jaw muscle twitches as he shoves his hands in his pockets.

"Fine." He grits through his teeth. He looks around at the packed room, rubbing his neck before he speaks.

"I'm sorry about last night. Some of Timo's associates wanted to go out for drinks. They gave me a hard time when I told them I'd rather get home...back to you. I just wanted to make a good impression on them, being the new guy. It was stupid. We went to a bar in the city and Victoria was there with her father, he knows Timo. I had no idea she would be there."

My blood ignites at the mention of her name, but I keep my face neutral.

"Anyway, one drink lead to another, and before I knew it, we were shit-faced. If my dad weren't there to drive us home, we'd probably have stayed in the city."

"Or with Victoria." I'm petty, I know, but I don't care.

JP's face flushes before anger settles on his face. "No. She sat at our table and talked with us, but that's it. Nothing happened. I swear to you, Charmaine."

"It's true, Charmaine," Joey pipes into the conversation.

"And then this morning, when I woke up, and the way I woke up, on the floor of your room, and I couldn't find you or remember what happened. I thought I did something stupid, unforgivable. I was desperate to find you, to make sure you were okay."

"Wait, how did you know about Victoria, anyway?" Joey butts in, annoyingly. "Did you go through his phone?" I hear a few chuckles as some of the men are listening in as well.

I glare at Joey. "No, of course not, you moron. His phone went off after he passed out, and when I picked it up, I saw the message from her, saying it was fun and they should do it again, soon." Some of the men immaturely "Ooooo," in response.

Annalisa steps up to JP. "Sounds innocent enough, JP. But, it's no secret Victoria has been thirsting over you for quite some time now. So, the question is, at any point while you were "talking," did you let her know to stop wasting her time because you and Charmaine are together now?"

I can see the color drain from his face, and that's answer enough. I look away, embarrassed to learn he wouldn't let her know the truth about us.

Is he ashamed of me?

"Charmaine, I don't expect you to believe me, but nothing happened, and I'm not going to do anything with her. I blocked her number, and I'm so sorry I hurt you. I love you." JP steps closer to me, but I move back, and I see the hurt in his face, but I'm hurt, too.

"I...I just need time, JP. This is new for both of us, but you haven't apologized for how you behaved before your meeting. You can't overreact the way you did about my...friend." His eyes narrow at me as he realizes I'm talking about Enzo.

"And now this. Maybe we moved too fast, maybe this was a mistake—" JP's eyes widen before I finish, as my Uncle walks out into the foyer, calling out to get everybody's attention and everyone turns towards him.

But JP keeps facing me.

My Uncle clears his throat, and with that, JP tears his eyes from me to focus on my Uncle as he gives his instructions for the night ahead.

Annalisa grabs my hand, squeezing it as I wipe a tear sliding under the mask.

~~~~~~~~~

**Relationships can be hard sometimes!

**Who thinks JP is telling the truth?