*A/N: Steamy scene coming up! Skip past the italic font if you'd rather not read it =)

<><><><><><><><>

JP moves even closer to me. Pressing me against the door, without actually touching me. I realize, I desperately crave his touch being so close to him, again. I hold my breath as his hand reaches up to pull the pin in my hair so it falls down over my shoulders.

He brushes my hair back away from eyes, but he's careful to not to touch my face and it's driving me insane. I watch his eyes as he looks over my hair then they move to my lips and I pull them in, moistening them instinctively, in anticipation.

There's a current of electricity humming between our bodies but he maintains his distance, just enough for me to feel the heat radiating off of him. I'm sure he can not only hear my loud heart beat but feel the vibrations from it beating so fast.

"Don't worry, principessa, I'm not going to touch you," His deep voice makes my stomach flip and my thighs clench together. He leans in, "at least, not until you beg me to." His lips brush against my ear as he speaks and his voice rings in my ear. He inhales my hair deeply.

I go back and forth with myself; While I'm aching for his touch, I don't want to give in to him so easily either. I angle my head to the side and watch as his adam's apple moves. I never thought the small movement would turn me on so much.

He pulls slowly on the sash of my robe and it opens, revealing my bare body to him. I watch as he pulls his bottom lipsin, while his eyes travel from my face down my body; I tremble underneath his intense gaze.

"Move towards the bed." For some unknown, crazy reason, I do as he instructs.

He tells me to remove the robe and to get on the bed. I shrug out of the robe and it pools at my feet. I keep my eyes on him as I sit on the bed and move back towards the center of it and lay back, my head on a pillow so I can keep my eyes on him.

"I want you touch yourself, amore mio...start at your gorgeous neck and slowly move down to your beautiful breasts." I do as he says and caress myself until I massage my breasts. I close my eyes, imagining his hands on me and I let out a low moan of pleasure.

"Eyes open, Stella."

I open my eyes and look up at him as he stands in front of me, watching me, his hands are down at sides.

"Spread your legs." I follow his demands. "Wider, Stella. Don't try to hide yourself from me." His eyes darken as he looks down at me, his eyes focused in on my wet sex.

"I want you to do exactly as I say." He tells me. I wait for his instruction as I watch him start to unbutton his shirt. He's always been toned and ripped, but there's a little more bulk on his body, more than what I remember.

His muscles ripple, as he removes his shirt; tensing and pulling, with each movement he makes and I'm like a moth to flame, mesmerized by his beautiful body.

He has more tattoos than I remember, too. Then I see one over his heart, that catches my eye. It's a crown, with my name in the center of it.

"Focus, princess." I glance back at his face as he smiles down at me. That damn smile.

He instructs me to move one of my hands down to my core. He's specific on which finger he wants me to use, and how to use it on myself. My breathing starts to accelerate.

"Does that feel good, amore?"

"Yes!" I pant out. He asks me if I want him to keep going. "Yes!" I moan loudly. He tells me to slip my finger inside of myself and to start moving slowly before I'm told to add another finger. I moan his name.

"Please..." I beg him.

"Yes, amore?"

"Please John Paul," I beg panting, "I need...I want..."

"What do you want, principessa?"

"You, only you, please."

He claims my hands in his, lifting them up above my head as he hovers over me, still careful to not touch me. But then he starts licking and lapping at my harden nipples before he puts one of my breasts in his mouth. I moan shamelessly as he continues on the other side.

"John Paul...please!"

"Tell me what you want, my love."

"I want you, I want you, now." I pant, breathlessly.

He plunges deeply into me and I cry out from the sheer pleasure of him, filling me. He starts moving slow at first, teasing me by rotating his hips so he withdraws, only to thrust into me deeper and harder over and over again.

His lips move over my breasts again, his tongue lapping and swirling around my nipples. I'm writhing under him, desperately wanting to touch him, but he keeps my hands over my head. I moan his name loudly.

"You're mine, princess." He looks down at me as he continues his movements. "Say it."

I don't hesitate. "I'm yours. Always." He lets go of my hands and I pull his face down and kiss him. His familiar taste envelopes me as his lips move over mine, soft but firm.

I wrap my legs around his waist and my arms around his shoulders, pulling him closer to me, not getting enough of him and I feel like I'm home in his arms. "I love you, JP." I say breathlessly.

"I love you Stella...Stella...Stella...Stella!"

I wake up gasping finding Annalisa and Samantha standing next to my bed. I'm breathing heavily. I feel dizzy and flushed.

It was a dream. Just a dream.

But it felt so real. I feel my face flame as I look back up at my friends, who are both watching me intently, a slow smirk playing on Samantha's lips.

"What time is it?" I avoid her eyes and sit up, running my hands down my probably wild bed head.

"Six thirty. We have some time before we have to go." Annalisa says. I lay back staring at the ceiling, still trying to catch my breath and slow down my racing heart. JP's face, lips and his strong arms flash in my mind and I shut my eyes, shaking my head.

"What kind of locoweed was that, Sam?"

She laughs, "Uh, uh nothing wrong with the weed, baby girl. It's the same kind I always get and you've had it before."

I get up and tell them I'm taking a quick shower before we go, even though I'll be taking another one when I get home later. I'm pulling out my clothes from the lone standing dresser I have in the room, when Samantha stops me. "Who's John Paul?"

I don't answer right away and turn around to face them. "No one." The lie feels sour in my mouth.

"Didn't sound like no one," Samantha says grinning, "Girl, I was about to make me some popcorn to listen in, but Annalisa ran in here, like you were on fire or some shit, trying to get you to wake up."

I glance over at Annalisa who gives me a small smile. I can't believe I was saying or probably moaning his name out loud.

"He is...he was...he's someone from my past." I stutter. "I don't know why I was dreaming about him, it's been over a year since...anyway he...we were...I'm going to jump in the shower." I hurry out of the room, closing the door behind me, quickly.

I try to focus on my breathing. I look around the bathroom to remember where I am and start counting. I haven't had an anxiety attack for a long time and really don't want one right now.

I take a deep breath, my heart rate is slowing, finally. That damn dream felt so real. The wetness in between my legs attests to that. I feel a little proud as I realize I can think about him and not want to rip my heart out even though there's still an overwhelming sadness.

I also realize there's a longing for him that feels just as intense. The feeling of being in his strong arms again felt so comforting, like I always belong there.

But I can feel the anger that still simmers deep within me though and I mentally reach for it, to unleash it. I need it if I'm going to attempt to make it through the fight tonight.

Samantha doesn't press me for more information on JP, when I get out of the shower and offers to braid my hair for the fight. I'm sure she and Annalisa probably talked while I was in the shower, but I shrug it away.

I know part of my healing will have to deal with talking about what happened more openly and little by little I've been working on doing that but it's still hard.

******

As we pulI in to the parking lot, I get a text from Zeeko that he's already inside. This venue is a lot larger and not as secluded as the previous one. Once I check in and we walk in we find Zeeko.

The prelims are starting as we take our seats towards the back where the other trainers and fighters are.

I smile as Samantha mingles with several crowd goers in between some of the fights leading up to mine, but still stays close by us.

The prelims are over pretty quick most ending in quick knockouts or fast submissions. In the first fight, one fighter had his arm broken while he was in in a hold. The sound of his bone breaking resonated loudly in the room. The second fight was over in the first round with a TKO (technical knockout). The rest followed in similar fashion.

But the last fight is what caught Samantha's attention. It was another knockout and the girl who was punched fell back with her arm still raised in the air.

"Holy shit!" Samantha exclaims, "bitch has her arm straight up in the air, like she's waiving up at God, on her way wait to meet him!" Annalisa chuckles at her and the Emcee announces the winner, while several people rush in, to check on the knocked out opponent..

Samantha has never seen these types of fights in person other than watching on TV and she was vocal on not being a fan of the brutality. I could tell she was getting more and more nervous as my name was inching further up the queue.

Finally, it had come to my turn. The song I chose to walk out to, starts playing, Crazy Train by Ozzy Osbourne. A cameraman follows me as I make my way through the crowd, followed by Anna, Zeeko, and Sam.

I take off my hoodie and Zeeko helps me as my sleeves get stuck on my gloves. I slip out of my shoes and socks, followed by my sweats. One of the officials stands in front of me and checks me before he clears me to go in the cage. I head into the cage and start warming up.

My song is cutout as my opponents song begins. She picked DMX's Cover of Ain't no Sunshine when she's gone. I watch as she crawls into the cage and moves to her corner. She stays low as she moves her head around like a predator stalking it's prey.

"Let's continue with the party, y'all! In the red corner, with a record of 20-0 let's hear it for Lightsout!" The crowd erupts with cheers and boos.

"In blue corner with a record of 5-0 let's welcome newcomer, Phoenix!" I'm surprised I have cheers this time but still hear some loud boos, knowing exactly where and who they're coming from.

The same group that was trolling me last weekend is here, giving me their death glares.

The bell rings and the fight begins. My opponent rushes me immediately and wraps her arms around me, slamming me to the ground. The air leaves my lungs in a whoosh, but I try to focus, as she landed on top of me in a half guard position.

I pin her leg in between mine, to keep her from doing a full mount on me. She throws down punches on me before I block her from continuing to hit me. I buck her off of me and scramble to get out from under her and take her back. I wrap my legs around her and get one arm under her chin.

She stands up with me on her back then slams back down on top of me. The impact makes me lose my grip on her with my legs and she gets out from my hold, and stands up. She throws kicks at my legs and I wait for the right moment and throw a heel kick up at her.

I catch her right on the nose and she falls back. I scurry to get up quickly and move on top of her but the ref pushes me away as the bell rings, signaling the end of the round.

Zeeko, rushes in with Annalisa. He takes over what usually does and has me raise my legs on his thighs as he crouches in front of me and Annalisa places a ice back on my neck and hands me water. "Good round Stella. She only wants to go to ground with you, afraid to stand up with you. Quick combo then break, repeat." He instructs.

The next few rounds we go back and forth trading punches. But she doesn't want to keep standing and takes me down. I realize she's probably got an edge on me with points by the amount of take downs she's getting.

It's the final round and we both have bloodied noses, but hers has been nonstop since the first round. She's struggling to breath through her nose. She rushes in and tries to take me down again, but I sprawl my legs out avoiding it...at first. But then she hooks my leg and pushes me down.

I use my feet to push up against her hips and shove her back away from me and stand up again. I throw a quick combination of a straight jab, cross and a left hook. She moves back enough for me to throw a kick and hit her with a spinning back kick connecting with her temple.

She falls back and I pounce on her landing one punch before the ref tackles me off of her, waving his hands above his head. Ending the fight. The crowd goes crazy, cheering loudly.

Zeeko runs in and hugs me tightly. I rush over to make sure my opponent is fine. She's sitting up now. I kneel in front of her and thank her.

She moves to kneel in front of me too and places her forehead on mine. She says something in a different language. It sounds Russian, but I'm not sure. She hugs me, thanking me for a good fight and congratulates me.

I hug Annalisa and then Samantha, when they run into the cage. "Girl, I swear I had like ten heart attacks watching. I would be happy, then cringe, covering my eyes, then yell, then be happy, it was a fucking rollercoaster!" Samantha tells me as she pulls back before giving me another hug.

The ref comes over to grabbing my arm, they are about to do the official announcement. The Emcee quiets down the crowd and then declares me the winner by TKO.

They do an interview with me and I try to keep my answers short. They ask some personal questions but I try to be genuine while still not saying too much.

As we make our way out of the cage, several crowd goers congratulate me and even have some trainers give me their cards. But I have no intention of being trained by anyone other than Zeeko.

Another staff member finds me and hands me an envelope with the earnings for the fight. It's a little more than double from the last time.

On the way home, we stop and grab some food to eat, since I didn't eat much having slept most of the day away. We pull into our parking spot, behind the apartment building; Annalisa and Samantha run since it started raining.

I call out to them that I forgot my phone in the car and head back to get it. I grab it from the middle console and lock the door shutting it as I turn back to go inside.

"You have something that belongs to me, bitch."

I look up and come face to face with Diabla. The fighter I beat about a month ago.

And she's not alone; I'm surrounded from all sides, by the groupies she had with her at the fights tonight.

Five against one.