Sam's POV

Her funeral was today.

Everyone dressed up in black and white. We were all seated in our seats with sorrow present on our faces.

I listened as everyone read their speeches about how amazing and loved she was.

I decided not to speak at her funeral because it was too much for me. Whenever I tried practicing my speech I would choke up and tears would come running down my face.

I couldn't take it. She was the one that gave me hope in this cruel world. Now she's gone.

My family loved her more than anything. They looked forward to the days she would come visit us.

Katherine loved her the most. She would stay in Katherine's room for hours, playing dress up with her.

Noah and Ruby came to her funeral to support me. They sat there quietly as everyone else took their turns talking about her.

Noah would occasionally pat me in the back and tell me everything g was going to be alright.

After the funeral was over I was the first one to leave. I couldn't handle staying in that place for one more minute. It reminded me too much of her.

It was my grandma's funeral.

She lost her battle to cancer two days ago but today was her funeral.

We had to leave the beach earlier than expected so I could make it to the funeral in time.

She was my best friend. When I was little I used to be a little demon child . She was the one that convinced my parents to not punish me.

She died while she was going under surgery to remove the blood clot that formed in her pancreas.

I went to Diamond's house but no one was there. Her car was gone and I know that her mother is at work.

I'll come visit her in a few hours then.

I wonder, what's Diamond doing?

Diamond's POV

Silence.

That's all that surrounded me.

I opened my eyes and looked at my surroundings. I was still on the woods  ground.

The gun didn't have any bullets in it.

If the the gun did have bullets in I would've been dead two years ago.

I was just sitting on the ground in puddles of my own tears. My depression I thought that went away years ago is rearing it's ugly head.

When tears were not clouding my vision I got off the ground and got in my car.

I thought my tears were done but as I drove back home tears came running down my face.

Within a few minutes I pulled up to my house. I was about to get out of my car when my phone rung.

It was my dad.

He hasn't called me in months. Without giving it a second thought I answered the phone.

"Hi dad"

"Hi princess, I just called you to let you know that I won't be able to come home for Christmas"

"What?"

Tears came streaming down my face. If he wouldn't be able to make it for Christmas then, that means he's also gonna miss my birthday too.

I guess this year is going to be just like last year. Another birthday without my dad.

I'm turning 18 and he's going to miss it.

"I'm sorry but we are needed more at a time like this. Donald Trump is declaring wars that we have to get ready for. We have to be ready to fight at any given moment"

"I understand dad"

I muffled my tears, hoping he didn't  hear me crying my eyes out. I guess that's my punishment for messing up two years ago.

I heard screaming in the background during out moment of silence. It sounds like someone was fussing at my dad.

"That was my general
I have to go sweetheart. Happy birthday and merry Christmas"

"Bye dad"

I quickly hung up before my dad heard my sudden out burst. Even though I'm disappointed I don't want him to know that and feel bad about missing my birthday.

I sat in my car for about 30 minutes crying my eyes out. I feel selfish for wanting my dad here instead of fight for our people.

I got out of my car and dragged myself inside my house. Something that usually takes me seconds took me about two minutes.

Once I got Inside of my room I plopped on my bed and buried my head in my pillow.

My eyes were closed for about two seconds before I felt asleep.

The next day

I yawned and stirred around. I tried to get out of bed but a hand was wrapped possessivly around my waist.

I turned around and I saw Sam's sleeping figure next to me. Faint snores escaped his lips as he breathed steadily.

I checked my alarm clock and saw it was 10 in the morning. What's he doing here so late?

I repeatedly kissed his cheeks, hoping he would wake up. Instead of waking up he smiled and pulled me closer to him.

"Good morning baby"

He said as he leaned over and kissed my forehead. I smiled and ran my fingers through his hair.

We stared into each other's eyes for what seemed like hours. The fact that I almost harmed myself yesterday and that my dad wouldn't be here for my birthday completely slipped my mind.

All I could think about is the boy that laid in front of me.

"Why were you crying last night?"

He asked me. He opened his eyes looked at me, waiting for an answer. Damn, I must've did that thing where I sleep cry.

I used to always do that. I would cry and talk in my sleep at the same time.

"N no I wasn't"

I tried to lie. I know he noticed that I stuttered when I said that because he tilted his head to the side.

He let go of me and sat up. He looked hurt and angry at the same time. He opened his mouth to say something but then he closed it.

I got out of bed and kneeled in front of him. I scooted in between his legs and wrapped my arms around his waist while my face rested on his stomach.

"Are you okay?"

He didn't answer me. Instead he unwrapped my hands around him and moved away from me.

What happened to him?

"Who's Jason? And don't lie to me either, almost every night I sleep with you you have nightmares and his name always pop up in them"

I sat in front of him in shocked. I didn't think I would have to reveal my pass this early.

Everyone has that one person they can't stop thinking about. That person for me was my ex boyfriend Jason. When I think about him I don't smile, I want to cry.

He's the reason why I was depressed for 2 years and counting.

He's the reason why my dad isn't here with me.

Jason is the reason why my whole world turned upside down.

He's a no good bastard that controlled my life and made me suffer throughout our whole 'relationship'.

If I saw into the future two years ago and saw that he was toxic for me I would've never said yes when he asked me to be his girlfriend.

That would've saved me trouble and heart ache.

But, I was too blind by what I thought was love. I let him take control of me and ruin my life.

There was a point in my life where I wouldn't leave my room. I would close all my curtains and lights and just sit in the dark.

I didn't get up to shower or eat. I just sat there in my own filth.

"Diamond, who's Jason?"

Sam asked me again. I truly don't know what to say. To me Jason wasn't my boyfriend, I was more of his slave. But to other people he was.

Sam doesnt know this but I'm keeping a huge secret from him. My mom told me to tell Sam but, I was too scared.

If I tell him I'm afraid he'll leave me. That's my biggest fear.

He's been my rock these last few months we've been dating. He kept me on stay on the right track and get out of my shell.

I love this guy, I don't want to lose him. Not now, not ever.

He was about to get up but I grabbed his arm. I could tell he was frustrated I wasn't answering he's question.

I took a deep breathe and faces away from him.

"Jason is my ex boyfriend and the father to my child"