THE DAY I LOST YOU

i was wrong.

apollo was cruel.

the gods were cruel,
even though they were my brethren,
even though ichor tainted my youth,
even though ambrosia curdled in my veins,
even though they drove us here,
even though they tainted our gaze.

beloved hector
apollo's favoured,
the champion of the prophecy
the saviour of troy
slain by his hand
did you fall, my patroclus,
clad in the armour of me,
with those honey eyes
those warm lips,
that skin of sun,
those feet of mortals

and over you did apollo watch
with his beady eyes and
gleeful sun,
marvelling in the little things
that the youths do in the name of love

i waited for you, patroclus, my dear,
i sat beside the shore.
i placed my head on the mellow grass
and thought of you even more
but the sun began to fall sombrely
and that's when i knew of the truth,
that even you, who is eternal in my heart,
is simply a being of youth

i raged, my patroclus,
i held your body close,
beside me you slept,
alongside the coast
where mother brought chains
and armour alike
but hector i would kill
with my hands bare and ripe
for i itched to see his blood
and his blood i did see
as i dragged his corpse from my
fallen hand
for all the men to flee.

"achilles rage will kill us all."
the gods sang their song.

"he defies the fates in his befall."
the gods plotted along.

"achilles will fall at the knotch of my bow."
kissed apollo to the suns cheek.

and did i fall, so softly and calm,
when the sun had reached its peak.

for you i kill thousands