{Cary}

Cary Christmas shopped all year round. By the time December twenty-third rolled around, the trick was remembering where he had squirrelled away all the little items he'd picked up for his family. He dug in the back of his sock drawer, peered under his bed and moved piles of laundry in his closet to uncover his collection of gifts.

Carols were blasting on the main floor and Kurt was bopping around, munching on shortbread while he made piles on the living room floor for every person on his and Jon's list. Cary very much approved of the man's Christmas spirit--the kitchen table was heaped with rolls of crisp, shiny paper and fluffy mountains of bows. He'd even bought cellophane tape in bulk.

"Mind if I wrap a few?" Cary asked, as he carried his armful of bags into the living room.

Kurt flourished his hand to the table. His glaringly red and green shirt was screen printed with an elf torso and clashed with the pink and tangerine highlights in his hair. Cary had to hand it to a queer man who didn't care that Christmas messed up his personal aesthetic for a day or two a year.

"What's mine is yours, Care Bear," Kurt drawled.

Cary rolled his eyes at the name. "I don't love it."

The other man shot him a mischievous look. "No? Hm too bad. I adore it."

"You are a trial and a tribulation in my old age," Cary grumbled, a line his old aunt used on him when he forgot to latch the gate and all the sheep got loose in the yard.

Kurt shouted a laugh. "Guilty as charged."

"You don't have my gift over there do you?" Cary asked. "I don't wanna spoil the surprise."

Kurt's eyes widened and he put his fingers over his mouth. "Your gift. Oh no Care Bear we forgot to shop for you!"

Cary paused in the kitchen trying to read across the room if the other man was joking.

Humming, Kurt busied himself, sitting with his legs spread in front of him and his back to Cary to slice a big chunk off a roll of sparkly pink and purple paper. "Well shoot," Kurt drawled, "We'll think of something big man, don't worry."

Cary wouldn't admit that his feelings were hurt, but his feelings were a little hurt. After years of Tim Hortons' gift cards from Jon he'd been hoping Kurt's influence would be a little more helpful.

Cary heaved a sigh. "It's fine. Not like you're livin' in my house, sleepin' with my brother or anything. No reason to remember me at all."

Inexplicably, this touched off a fit of giggles from the living room.

Cary couldn't remember what was in half the bags he'd unloaded onto the counter. He puzzled over two handmade soap and lotion sets before realizing he must have bought one for his mom and one for his now ex-girlfriend, Liya. Looked like Kurt was getting more smelly bathroom products for Christmas this year.

Jon blew into the kitchen, T-shirt dark with sweat, hands still wrapped from his workout in the basement. He stuck his head in the fridge. "Mind if I make a stir fry?" he asked. "I'm craving all the ginger and fresh veg to kick the ass of the last of this cold."

"Go for it," Cary said, swiftly covering the gift he'd made for Jon with an empty gift bag.

"Hey," Jon said, leaning into the living room. "Visser. You're not wrapping those before I've seen them, are you?"

Kurt paused, lifting his hands in the air and widening his blue eyes. "Maybe? Come over here and I'll give you the quick tour."

"I'm all sweaty," Jon said.

"Better and better," Kurt said.

Cary tuned out their murmured conversation, neatly folding and taping the wrapping paper around his gifts for his mom and sisters. From the sound of Jon's soft laughter he was pretty sure he would get an eyeful if he leaned around the kitchen doorway to look--he knew better by now. It was obvious to Cary that his brother had missed the hell out of being touched and he thought maybe Jon was making up for lost time.

Just because Cary couldn't relate didn't mean he wasn't happy for him; the difference between Jon this year and any previous December was stark. Normally, Jon plodded through this month with his shoulders hunched and his fists closed, like someone trying to make it home in a blizzard without losing their fingers to the icy cold. Jon laughing in December? That was new and Cary heartily approved.

By the time they were sitting down to Jon's stir fry and rice there was a mountain of gleaming wrapped boxes topped with fluffy bows under the Christmas tree. Kurt had done all of Cary's bows as well as his own, curling the yards of ribbon with child-like enthusiasm.

When grace had been said, Jon shot an amused look at the mound of presents. "We're going to have to take the van to Mom and Dad's to fit everything," Jon said. "I guess we better get some use out of it while we can."

"You're not keeping it?" Kurt asked, licking a rice grain off the end of his chopstick.

Jon shook his head. "Don't need it. Can't afford it."

"Well--I've been thinking about going back to Uni," Kurt said casually. "Think we can afford that?"

"One of us should finish our degree," Jon said. "What are you thinking of taking?"

Kurt's face was thoughtful. "I might switch into Education. Be a high school music teacher or...English Arts maybe. If I'm being honest, those classes kept me sane in high school. I got the feeling there was more than the narrow little slot I was tryin' to shove myself into and maybe there was hope coming for me." He laughed a little. "Anyways, teaching is a nice steady gig with summers off. So if I want to try a solo tour or...I don't know, tramp around the mountains with you, Jon. Keeps my options open."

Jon exchanged a look with Cary. "Do we need three incomes to keep the house?" Jon asked.

Cary shook his head. The market for contractors was still warm; looked like renovating your existing house, instead of buying a new one, was going to be a trend for a while. "We got enough work to make it. But I'm gonna be stuck for a good guy if you're saying you're quitting on me, Kurt."

"I'm a good guy," Jon said.

Cary shot him a surprised look. "I figured you'd be looking for a job in social work," he said.

Jon's elbows were leaned on the table, his fingers clasped around his upper arms. He shook his head once, his mouth tucked and unhappy. "I just lost my dream job," he said. "A home setting where we could pray for our kids and care for them like--something close to family. I think being a social worker would break my heart after that." He lifted his shoulders. "I meant it when I said I need to find something new. That's going to take some time."

The table was quiet while Cary did the math. "You gays looking for your own place?" He tried to sound casual.

Kurt drew back, studying him. "Do you want us to look for our own place?" he asked slowly.

Cary shrugged. "I assumed you would. Start your own family or whatever."

Jon snorted a laugh. "Holy shit I'm not ready to be a parent. I have so much counselling I need to do. But we could give you your space back if you wanted, Care. I always said I planned to stay 'til I'm done school--and I'm done now. We could take off and have an adventure on our own."

Kurt smiled briefly at Jon's words, but he looked ambivalent. "I like it here," he said, his voice vibrating a little. He rubbed his ear, looking sideways at Cary. "You kicking us out, Care Bear? Does it bug you to have us around?"

Cary gave this some thought; there was a weight under that question and he wanted to be honest. "It doesn't bug me," he said slowly. "It's a little more work having two extra people around. But I love you both."

"You know we love you back?" Kurt's face was tight with worry. "We're not takin' you for granted?"

"Yeah, I know that," Cary said. Kurt's upset feelings were palpable across the table; Jon was quiet, his arm draped over the back of Kurt's chair watching them.

"What's up, Visser," Cary said. "You askin' to stay?"

"Didn't even occur to me we might have to move," Kurt said. His smile was crooked, like he couldn't quite pull off the careless grin he wanted. "I was thinkin' we'd settle down, make muffins for the neighbors and start calling our pets our kids." He glanced apologetically at Jon. "It's not an adventure to me to pack up and not know where I'm layin' my head. It's just another shitty day in the life."

Smoothing his front, Kurt lifted his eyes to look at the scuffed cupboards and the creaky stairway and the living room with the worn wood floors, lines drawn around his long mouth. "It's been a minute. Since I had a home where I feel like I belong. And it's not just this house, it's you too, Care. I know I'm a lot but...I like knowin' you're across the hall and it's not just me and Jon by ourselves. I need people." Kurt swallowed, like the vulnerability of that admission caught even him by surprise.

Ducking his head, Kurt made his shoulders small. "It's your place. But if we're takin' a vote--and you're not sick of havin' us--I like livin' here. A lot."

Jon had watched this rambling speech closely, biting the corner of his mouth. When Kurt was done, he hugged his arm around his partner's shoulders. "If it's not completely obvious, I'm just climbing into your bed wherever you end up, Kurt. I'm good if I'm with you."

This was something Cary envied about Jon; Jon might be nearly half Cary's size but his brother felt safe to his bones wherever he was. What had just become clear to Cary was Kurt Visser didn't. Cary thought of how many years of sleeping under Pete and Mel's roof it took him to feel anything close to safe. There was some satisfaction in realizing he could do that for another human.

"No point in fixin' something that's not broke," Cary said gruffly. "You gays want to stay, why don't you stay. You're not too much for me if I'm not too much for you. We'll just keep makin' this work." He got to his feet to clear his bowl to the sink, and Kurt's face lifted to follow him up, a smile tentatively pulling up on his mouth.

"You're not just sayin' that?" Kurt asked, his voice still a little wobbly.

Cary made a huffing noise. "Doesn't sound like me. If we're bein' honest, I wasn't lovin' the idea of livin' alone either. Win all around."

Kurt leapt to his feet and tackled Cary in a hug, who made a surprised 'oof.' "Careeeey you're the best!"

Kurt was real lucky Cary was used to him by now. "You get one of these a week," Cary said, patting his angular shoulders with one hand. "Use it wisely."

Kurt chortled, letting him go. "Not counting holidays like Christmas and birthdays, right? Which means I get two Care Bear hugs this week, lucky me--lucky you. Imma get the ice cream out; I know you want dessert and we're all out of shortbreads."

Cary dropped his eyes to Jon, who had been sitting quietly, his fingers over his smile during this exchange. Jon uncovered his mouth and his lips said soundlessly: Thank you.

Cary smiled back and shrugged. His counsellor had been banging on for months about letting people in and getting out of his rut. He figured this would keep her happy for quite some time.

*Of course the guys can't break up their house, am I right??

What do you think of Kurt's plan to become a high school teacher?*

1979 words.