Harry ran his finger over the metal anchor on Louis' wrist that laid over his stomach as he slept. The morning sun filtered through the thin curtains of his flat and made the whole room look fuzzy. Harry only got a couple hours of sleep. He didn't want to miss anything. Having Louis back after weeks of missing him, then hearing him say he didn't want to do this anymore, and convincing him to stay, it was a lot and Harry was afraid that if he took his eyes off Louis for a second he'd run.

Louis' jeans started buzzing again. He'd been getting calls all morning, but Louis seemed exhausted and Harry didn't have the heart to wake him just yet. But Louis seemed to sense that the world was moving along without him because he rolled onto his back and stretched out his body, Harry's eyes running along the lines of his lean body. Louis' eyes opened slowly and he smiled for a moment before his eyes shot open wide and he sat up quickly.

"What time is it?"

"I don't know, like eleven? I didn't want to wake you."

Louis scrambled out of bed and grabbed his clothes. He plucked his phone from his pocket and swore when he saw all the missed calls. "Zayn, shit. I have to go."

"Why? What's wrong?"

Louis pulled his clothing on hastily and gave Harry a quick kiss. "Don't worry about it."

Harry got out of bed, still naked, and grabbed Louis' wrist as he turned away. "Don't tell me that. What's wrong with Zayn?" Louis' eyes looked a little shiner than they did a moment ago so Harry pulled him into a hug and asked again, "What's wrong?"

Louis shook his head in Harry's shoulder and pulled back, "Get dressed. I have to go. We can talk on the way."

***

They didn't really talk on the way. Louis was on the phone with Zayn the whole time, asking if he was okay. If he'd ate anything today. By the time they got to Louis' apartment, Louis was even more frustrated and Harry was scared.

Louis turned the car off and they sat in silence for a moment. "I can't believe it."

"What?" Harry asked quietly.

Louis looked down at his lap, "I think I've broken every single rule. I took your call while I was on the job, you're seeing my apartment, Headquarters knows about you. Hell, I never even taught you how to use a gun."

Harry but his lip nervously, "I'm sorry I called you."

Louis shook his head, "No, Harry. Don't be. You'd just found out I kill people, killed someone you knew. I can understand the need to talk to me."

Harry just nodded because he couldn't think of anything to help the situation. Actually he could only think of something that would make it worse. "Lou?"

"Yeah, baby?" Louis finally looked up to him.

Harry gnawed on his lip some more, "Nothing. It's nothing. Don't you need to go check on Zayn."

That did the trick because Louis was rocketing out of the car and into his building. He left the door cracked and Harry followed quickly. He ran after Louis as they bounded up the stairs and Louis unlocked his door. Harry stopped in the living room to check the place out. It looked...normal. Louis' keys on the coffee table along with a big Manila envelope. A few dishes sat in the sink and there were shoes by the door. It looked so unlike a spy's flat. Harry was overwhelmingly underwhelmed.

He made his way down the hallway to the open door of a bedroom and stopped in his tracks. Zayn was laying in the middle of a big bed, wearing only loose pants, on his stomach with Louis next to him. His back was crisscrossed with raised burns that looked puffy and painful. He was biting down on a flannel while Louis pealed off old bandages and rubbed cream on the wounds.

"Oh my God, Zayn," Harry breathed.

Louis' head snapped up at Harry's voice, his face stern. "Come here. Sit down next to me and don't talk."

Harry obeyed and sat careful on the bed so he didn't jostle Zayn's hurt body. He wanted so badly to ask what happened, but Louis said not to talk so he waited quietly for Louis to finish. When he did he gave Zayn a soft kiss on his temple and a quick pet of his hair before pulling Harry up and into the hallway, shutting the door behind them.

"He'll be fine. It's not as bad as it looks." Louis could hear the falsehood in his voice and knew Harry could too by the look on his face.

"I can help," Harry offered.

"It's fine. I've got it. I've got him. I need you to behave. We still have to talk, but for now I need to sit with him until he goes back to sleep. You can try and find something to eat, although I wouldn't count on it, and I'll be right out." Louis kissed him on the cheek and disappeared back into the bedroom.

Harry went out the living room and clicked on the television, flipping channels until he came across a late daytime soap that he used to watch when he was younger.

Louis sat down on the bed again and ran his fingers through Zayn's hair. "Better?"

"You didn't have to rush home, Lou. You haven't seen Harry is weeks. I just didn't know where you were and after this job..."

"I know and I haven't seen you in weeks either, and you're hurt because of me. Right now I'm staying with you. I shouldn't have left you last night. I'm so sorry. I just needed to make sure he was okay."

"I know. It's okay, Lou. I've had worse."

Louis face scrunched up, "Can you not say that? I don't like to think about it."

"It is nice to have someone to help change the bandages."

Louis scratched lightly at his scalp, "Of course, babe. I'm so sorry."

Zayn scooted closer so he could put his head on Louis' thigh, "Not your fault."

"It is. I started this whole thing with Headquarters and I didn't watch closely enough and I didn't move fast enough. I could've saved you."

Zayn gripped Louis' knee behind his head, "You did save me. Louis, you don't know how thankful I am that he didn't get the chance to be inside me again. He said he wasn't going to prep me this time and that he wanted me to scream. I don't know what I'd be like if you hadn't of saved me."

Louis shuddered at the thought of Zayn being worse off than this. He scooted down the bed and pulled Zayn on top of him. "I'm so sorry."

"Stop it. Stop being sorry."

"I can't help it. I swear we're done, Zee. No more. Fuck them."

"I wish."

Louis ran his hand up and down Zayn's arm, steering clear of the rope burn on his wrist. "I mean it. No more."

"Don't be dumb, Louis."

"I'm not. I'm just fucking done. Zayn, they raped you. They forced you to have sex with a man that hurt you. That's unacceptable."

"They can probably hear you right now."

"I know they can. And I hope they know I'm fucking done."

"Is he okay?"

"They know his name, Zayn. And I don't know. We sort of fought and then didn't fight and then I came here and he saw you and I don't know..."

"What did you fight about?"

"Us."

Zayn rolled his eyes, "Really? What about you guys?"

"I told how wrong it was for me to try and control him. I was reminded all over again what I learned nearly eight years ago when I found you the first time. Seeing you being forced against your will, I just, I can't do that to him. I care about him too much."

"I can't say I understand the way you guys are, but from what I see it's not the same thing. I know I was angry when I first found out about the way you, you know, treat him, but then I saw how Harry gets when you do that, and it's not the same. You're not raping him, Lou. I still don't fully understand it, but I know that much."

Louis wasn't sure what to say. He hadn't let his mind go there, but maybe that was it. Maybe he thought he was raping Harry like all those men had raped Zayn. "I'm afraid of hurting him. Like physically, emotionally. I don't want to hurt him."

"You won't. Well you won't again. I saw his face that day you left him in the hotel, and man, I swear to you I ever have to see that face on the boy again I'll shoot you myself," Zayn popped his head up, "I can't believe I'm saying that, but yeah, don't hurt him again."

"My head's just spinning with everything. Like, he was reading off all these things he wanted me to do to him and I was this close to doing every single one of them at once, but they sounded so harsh. He wants me to tie him up and choke him and gag him and-"

"Ok can we not, please. Harry may like that stuff, but I can't."

Louis held him just a little tighter, but onto a little so he didn't hurt him, "I'm sorry, yeah. But see I get why you think it's bad, and I do too sometimes, but Harry can't seem to get it. He doesn't know about us, about you, and what happened to you."

"Then tell him."

"No, I wouldn't do that to you, Zayn."

Zayn tried to sit up enough to look at Louis, "Then I will."

"No, Zayn, no."

"I'm serious. Go get him and bring him here. He's a good kid, and he doesn't understand why you won't give him what he wants. He deserves to know."

"You don't have to do this Zayn."

"Louis, go get him, before I get up and get him myself."

Louis put a firm hand on his arm, "No. Don't. I'll go. Thank you," he kissed Zayn's hair, "Really, thank you so much for this."

"Shut up and get away from me. You're being clingy."

Louis laughed and carefully got out from under Zayn's weak body to fetch Harry. He couldn't believe this was about to happen. Harry would finally understand.