Result day...

Partner: Gogol, how much are you expecting?

Gogol: A perfect score!

Partner: Really!?

Gogol: 100%

Partner: How come you are so confident?

Gogol: (Grins) You will get to know soon.

Physics teacher: Sakshi, (handing over the answer script) better than before.

Sakshi: (seeing the score) Ughhh...

Gogol: (stopping Sakshi midway) How much?

Sakshi: I have improved by a mark.

Gogol: (patting Sakshi on her back) Better luck next time.

Physics teacher (raging): Rahul, this is the last warning I am giving you. If you don't pass the next exam, I am going to demote you!

Gogol: Bhai??

Rahul: +1-1 (sighs)

Gogol: 0!?

Rahul: 10, bhai. Only 10!! (laughing like mad) +1-1 improvement. Give me your address. (Crying) I don't want to return home.

Partner: The fact that you got 10 is making me tremble. (Hiding his face behind his palms) How much am I going to get...?

Gogol: Chill, bro!

Physics teacher: Mukteshwar Mishra, come to my desk at once!

Partner (Getting up): Yes, Ma'am!

Physics teacher: Hmm...didn't expect this from you. Good! Keep working hard.

Partner: (Unfolding the answer script)  WhatTt!!

Gogol: Failed!!!?

Partner (swinging his answer script in the air): I got a FIFTYYYYY! (Staring at the ceiling above) Thank you, God! (Gives a flying kiss) I will give you Besan laddoo!!

Gogol: Haha, good for you!

Physics teacher: Gogooooool!!

Gogol (showing his teeth): Coming, Ma'am!

Physics teacher: Ask your parents to call me in the evening. They have to meet me in the office tomorrow.

Gogol (raising his eyebrows): Are you going to hand over the first prize to them? Why not give it today only?

Physics teacher: Tell them that I will be handing over your answer script to them. And you dare not be absent tomorrow!

Gogol: Sure, Ma'am. What are you going to give me for ranking 1st in the class?

Physics teacher: Come near.

Gogol: Gift?

Physics teacher picks up the meter rule and thrashes it on Gogol's back.

Gogol: Aaaaahhh...aaaah! Ma'aaaam! Is it reward or punishment?

Physics teacher: This is what I gift students like you!

Gogol: (looking at Rakshit with a puzzled expression) Being a topper needs strength and courage...!
(Thinking to himself) Never strive for higher ideals...its better to keep knowledge at stake than to risk your life.

Physics teacher: This serves you right! NOW GO TO YOUR PLACE, AND DON'T SHOW THIS FACE OF YOURS TO ME EVER AGAIN!!

Gogol: Thank goodness! Now I don't need to worry about anything else. Free! AT LAST, I AM FREE!

Physics teacher: What's the matter with you?

Gogol: Ma'am, you just said that I don't need to attend classes further. Now I can relax.

Physics teacher: Gogol!!! (A slap lands on Gogol's right cheek) MEET ME IN THE OFFICE TOMORROW!!

Gogol (in low spirits): Okay, Ma'am.

Physics teacher: Rakshit, come and collect your answer script, dear.

Rakshit (getting up): Yes, Ma'am.

Physics teacher (smiling): As always. Here, take this chocolate!

Rakshit: Thank you, Ma'am!

Gogol (raising his eyebrows): Why? What has he done?

Physics teacher: He has stood first in the class.

Gogol: Me too! Then why chocolate for him, and thrashing for me??

Physics teacher: Come, come here. (Displaying Gogol's answer script in front of the whole class) See this! What do you see?

Whole class: A BIG ZERO!!!

Physics teacher: No, not a zero. How can I give my sweet Gogol a zero? (Speaking sarcastically) It's a rasgulla! Eat it when you are hungry, Gogol.

Gogol (walking back to his desk): THIS ISN'T FAIR.

Physics teacher: (to Gogol) Take your answer script, analyse your mistakes, and return it to me before the class ends. Everything you have written is rubbish! Not a single place where I could have given you marks. It took me a whole day to go through that script of yours.

Gogol (taking the answer script): Uff!

Partner: What happened, Gogol? You were so sure of your score. How did it turn to be this poor?

Gogol: (Shrugging) God knows! (In serious tone) I had copied letter by letter. Mind it, LETTER BY LETTER!

Partner: From Rakshit?

Gogol: Yes.

Partner: Strange.

Gogol: Hmm. (Turning over the pages of his answer script) Huh? Mad or what!?

Partner (trying to figure out the mistake): Ah hah! A! It should have been λ, Gogol! And not an 'A'!

Gogol (not paying attention): I thought only Rakshit doesn't know it...but it seems that our teacher also has no knowledge about it!

Partner (puzzled): WhAt??

Gogol: See, during the test Rakshit was writing 'এ' in every answer. I thought it was the result of too much of studying. His brain was unable to function properly. Why else would he write Bengali in Physics exam? I thought of correcting the mistake in my answer. So I replaced 'এ' with 'A'.

Partner: 'λ' and 'এ'!! Hahaha, GogO-

Physics teacher: What's going on over there? (To Gogol) Return that answer script.

Gogol: Yes. (To himself) Everyone in this class is insane!

Physics teacher: Do you have any private tutor, Gogol? Who mentors you at home?

Gogol: Yes, Ma'am.

Physics teacher: You shouldn't be making such mistakes at this age. How many tuitions do you attend? 4 or 5? Or one per subject?

Gogol (counting with his fingers): 5, 6...ha ha...8...hmm...Mittir Para...Amal Kumar...

After 3 minutes...

Physics teacher: Leave it! Tell me  when was the last time you opened that Physics book of yours.

Gogol: Wait, Ma'am. I am counting.

Physics teacher: (Annoyed) Have you forgotten counting as well!?

Gogol: It was 3rd April when I opened my book last.

Physics teacher: 3rd April?

Student: Ma'am, that was the day we bought our books for the new session.

Whole class laughs.

Physics teacher: WhA-? You mean to say that you haven't gone through your Physics book ever since you got it? Not even once in this eleven-month period??

Gogol: No, only once when I received it. That was only to check if there were any torn pages inside. (After thinking for some time) Nope. I have opened it more than once...in fact every alternate day to scribble down Japanese alphabets and draw animes during your boring lectures!

Physics teacher: GOGOL, GET OUT OF MY CLASS!!!

Gogol: WhY?

Physics teacher: Don't irritate me! (Slaps Gogol)

Gogol: I was just telling the truth! No wonder why people don't tell truth these days! Honesty pays off... nonsense! The one who says this is the biggest fool to live on this Earth!

Physics teacher: Not a further word from you!

Gogol: But Ma'am, your question has remained unanswered.

Physics teacher: Shut up!

Gogol: I will give you the information, and then leave the class.

Physics teacher: Okay...hurry up! You are disturbing my class!

Gogol: I have 4 tuitions for Physics. One more will be added, I fear.

Physics teacher: (Eyes widen) FOUR?? What for do you need 4 tuitions?

Gogol: What should I say about this sad tale?

Physics teacher: What about other subjects?

Gogol (contemplating): 6 for Mathematics, 5 for Chemistry, 4 for English, 5 for Histor-

Whole class: (In awe) OMG!!

Physics teacher: You take 5 tuitions for History??

Gogol: Uh huh.

Physics teacher: What's there to learn in History? Only memorizing dates and events... And what's so complicated in English...grammar, plays, prose, and poetry. Nothing's making sense to me.

Gogol: Same Ma'am, same! Instead of 'Humayun', I had written Aurangzeb as the answer to the question: The battle of Chausa was fought between ___________ and Sher Shah Suri. And for this teeny-weeny mistake of mine, our History teacher gave me a four-hour lecture in front of my parents. You are talking about Aurangzeb, even his grandfather wasn't born at that time! And Mom, hearing this, drove me straight back home, contacted the nearest Private Tutors' Association and that very evening I was introduced to my new History tutor.

Partner: Eng-?

Gogol: Nina Ma'am always instructs us to copy the lines from the dramas and stories. I heeded to her words. I copied each and every line from the book. And to further make my answers  stand out, I wrote everything in Shakespearean language.

Now thatest thou knowest everythingeth Basanio, cometh to rescueth me. I thy friend, Antonio, asketh thee to meeteth me for the lastest time.

Back home...

Mom: Guess what? I have prepared mutton curry for dinner tonight! Our Gogol has got very good grades this time. (Smiling) This is to appreciate his efforts.

Gogol (Managing to smile): Mom, there was no need for all this.

Dad: No...no, Gogol. You deserve it!

Grandpa: Haha. Didn't I say our Gogol is going to make us proud one day!?

At the dining table that night...

Grandma: Gogu dear, have some more. You haven't eaten much. Even your mutton curry has remained untouched.

Mom: What's wrong, Gogol? Are you not feeling well? (Putting her palm on Gogol's forehead) No, you don't have fever. Then?

Dad: Hmm. What's it, son? You haven't even told us about your marks, Gogol. Your teacher is going to give us a surprise tomorrow...that's absolutely fine. But provide us at least some hints. She didn't inform us anything more over the phone.

Gogol: Dad, surprises shouldn't be revealed.

Grandpa: Aah hah...! Our Gogol is nervous. This is the first time he's going to receive an award.

Grandma: Yes, Gogu. Cheer up! We are all set to go to see your teacher handing over the trophy to you! Hurrah!

Dad: Have you really stood first in the class, Gogol? I just can't believe it!

Mom (smiling proudly): My sweet Gogol's leading the list! (Hugs Gogol)

Gogol: Uhm...I have got sometHiNg to saY...(Looking across the table) I am leading the list no doubt, but from the bottom...

A long silence follows.

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