Despite all her attempts to divert her mind, anger at him to having withhold information and fear of the uncertain future kept invading her thoughts. Fear was not an emotion she liked to acknowledge and hence pushed it to the background, letting anger simmer.

Nothing seemed to soothe her nerves.

The sight of the setting sun reminded her of the sunset she had watched, encircled by his arms. Why does the sky look so colourless today? Have all the colours gone to where he stands with her?? She briskly shook her head trying to dislodge the notion.

When Kasthuri pulled her to the swings, memories of their time together there arose along with some bitter fears – Is he pushing her on the swings there? No, he wouldn't!

Engaging in the expected idle chit-chat with the other inhabitants seemed to further stretch her already frayed nerves. Hence, the sight of the monthly visitor felt almost welcome, as it allowed her to withdraw to the solitude of a structure built at some distance from the haweli.

At times, Kasthuri would perch atop a portable cot few feet away from the door and ramble about many things. But Hari soon realised that she mostly spoke on inconsequential topics, nothing revealing her relationship with the earlier Raja-sa or how she got here. And even more importantly, never about the future. It was perplexing why the young woman was so set on living a life, hidden away from the world, without any personal aspirations.

As couple of days passed, the intrigue grew. Possibly, because it provided Hari the much-needed temporary escape from her own emotions.

One afternoon, as she partook of the lunch Kasthuri had brought over, she uttered tentatively "You and Bhanumati Masi... seem genuinely fond of each other... I cannot understand the lack of resentment."

After pondering the unasked question, the other woman responded "Yes, we share real warmth... like family. I suppose we have never viewed each other as competition. When I arrived, about five years back, there were already four women here. Their equation had been set for a while. They did not seem to resent my arrival... maybe they were used to sharing Raja-sa's attention anyway. Well, that's not entirely true... Jiji-sa was upset to start with, but she quickly got over it. Others didn't seem to care."

Smiling nostalgically, she continued "As you must have realised, Jiji-sa has been in-charge of running this place... forever! She was always Raja-sa's favourite... they shared something... special. Till the end."

"Then why did he keep so many women here then? Why wasn't she enough?" Hari's brow creased.

Kasthuri shrugged "I have never asked these questions of Jiji-sa. If she made her peace with it, then who am I to question... I don't know about the beginning, but in the latter years I don't think it was about Raja-sa's physical needs. It was probably more about preserving the image of a virile, strong man."

After silently nibbling on her lower lip for a bit, she continued "He didn't share any intimacy with me. Perhaps, that's why Jija-sa bears me more love... I call her Jiji... but she treats me almost like a daughter... especially, since Abha had left just a while before I arrived."

They never shared any intimacy?! Eyes wide with surprise, Hari uttered "Why did he bring you over then?!"

"My father was a Thakur of a small bundle of lands. After he passed, my brother became my guardian. He was keen to add more lands to his name. When Raja-sa once visited, Bhai-sa thought it would be a good idea to offer me as incentive... to form a kinship with his majesty."

Fidgeting with a blade of grass, Kasthuri added "Raja-sa had initially refused the offer. But when I heard of it, I sought a private audience with him and told him that I wished to get away before Bhai-sa decided to trade me with someone who was more likely to make my life miserable. I beseeched him to take me away and that I wouldn't demand much. Fortunately, we were able to reach an understanding and I escaped to this life."

Confounded, Hari muttered "So, he just brought you here and then ignored you??"

"Of course not! He would spend time with me too... but it was different. We would sometimes play Chaturanga or Pachisi. At times we would just talk about different things... he always said I have a very bright mind! Sometimes, he would bring me books and then ask me what I thought of them." Kasthuri's eyes twinkled as she reminisced.

"Did you never yearn for a man or a family of your own??" Hari hesitantly enquired.

Nervously running the tip of the tongue across her lips, the older woman responded, "Not really... and I did find a family when I arrived here. This freedom, here, to be me... is more than I had hoped for."

Neera approached and informed Kasthuri "They are calling you inside for lunch."

She is happy to hide in this place forever?? How can she not want more?! Hari finished the rest of her lunch, dwelling on the recent revelations.

Later, she sat watching the chickens clucking around the yard and picking on little bugs and worms. Observing their dynamics and interactions proved a good distraction too. At least for some time.

Five days later, she resumed her newly established routine.

Of course, there was no standing at her window in the evenings.

Instead, most evenings were spent listening into the conversations between the other ladies as they reminisced about the old days. Occasionally, Hari would share a little about Chandrika, Chandanpur and her journey to Sudhagadh.

Every now and then, Hari would watch Bhanumati with a mix of emotions. It was evident the woman was warm and gentle, and yet, at times, Hari wanted to violently shake her and demand – Why did you put up with all these other women? If you really shared something special with your Raja-sa, how could you welcome the others and share him with them? Did you not realise that you were setting a precedent, that others here would either be forced to follow or fight?!

But it was hard to hate the woman, who would send her warm milk before bedtime, or insist on massaging oil into her scalp.

Once she handed Hari a beautiful, heavily embellished red ghagra and odhani "Keep this... I won't ever wear this now. The silk is from Banaras. Raja-sa had specially ordered it when Abha was born." Gently caressing Hari's cheek, she added with a sad look "You remind me of her... Had I known I wouldn't get to meet her again... I would have given this to her when she left. But Raja-sa used to love seeing me in this... so I kept it. Now, both are gone."

* * *

Far away, one evening, Vayu was walking in the sprawling garden with Rudra.

On their arrival, they had been grandly welcomed by the King and Queen of Udaygadh, who had been greatly relieved by Vayu's arrival. Though Brijraj had not expressed it so openly, Ambala had not been so diplomatic about it. She had repeatedly pointed out how long it had been since he had visited them.

Much to Vayu's relief, the arrival of more guests had left the hosts with little time to just dote on him.

Another thing he had been thankful for was, other than formal meeting with Samidha in the presence of the whole family, there hadn't been any occasion to converse with her. He wasn't sure what she had heard and how to explain it. The apprehensions, about his decision related to Harinakshi, which he had refused to acknowledge for long, were finally rearing their heads.

But when he suddenly encountered Samidha, accompanied by couple of other women, in the garden during the stroll with Rudra, his guard was down. Momentarily slipping into the old ways, he smiled at her warmly with twinkling eyes.

Returning the smile with equal warmth, she hastened towards him "Finally! I had started wondering if you have really started enjoying the company of all those stuffy old men!"

Before he could respond, taking in his appearance from head to toe, she teased "Now that I see you up close... I can see... you are on the way to become an old man yourself! Is that a grey hair in your moustache??"

"Just because you have grown up a little taller does not mean you have to start talking like a grandmother!" he fake-frowned at her.

Eyes twinkling, she uttered "I really have grown much taller than last time, right?!" Coming closer to stand next to him, she announced gleefully "See, I am almost as tall as your shoulder now!"

One of the women accompanying her, rebuked her in a polite tone "Rajkumari-sa, it is not becoming of a young lady to behave so unguardedly. Many eyes watch you."

Jutting out her chin, she asked "Would it be okay if I take a walk with his majesty, the King of Sudhagadh and Rudra-sa? Of course, while many eyes watch us!"

The woman replied with a poker face "Of course. And we shall follow a few steps behind."

Huffing in annoyance, Samidha muttered as she started walking "My turning fifteen has made everything so difficult..."

Noting that the two men were grinning at her words, she scowled "So, you find it funny?! You have no idea how many new rules I must learn every day! Maa-sa is constantly quizzing me either on protocols or duties."

Referring to her very slim, almost pre-adolescent, petite, physique, Rudra teased "Fifteen?? You still look like you are twelve!"

Her chirpy demeanour instantly vanished, and eyes dulled "Twelve... that wasn't a good age. In fact, the worst. I wish, I had never turned twelve."

Both Vayu and Rudra paled as realisation dawned.

Rudra stuttered "Samidha... please forgive my thoughtlessness. It was just a slip of tongue."

She nodded but stayed silent.

After few steps filled with awkward silence, Vayu blurted the first thing he could think of "Did you like the gifts sent by Maa-sa?" He tried to infuse some forced humour "She will interrogate me as soon as I reach Sudhagadh!"

Though her eyes still did not twinkle, she too forced her lips into a smile "She is always so thoughtful. I will write her a letter, to send with you. It would have been great if she could have accompanied you. Please ask her to look after her health. Maa-sa was looking forward to meeting her."

Changing the topic, she enquired "And how is Daksha Jiji-sa? Is her health keeping well? I believe the baby will be arriving soon."

Some mundane chit-conversation followed about the wellbeing of various members of the family.

Keen to make up for his earlier faux-paus, Rudra asked the young girl "Please tell us that you have been up to something fun other than your mother's training!"

Some twinkle retuned to her eyes "I have. But it is something that I must show you. Please follow me."

She led them to a part of the garden further away from the palace, which was located at a slightly lower level. Standing at the topmost step, she shared, voice tinged with joy and pride "I have designed this part of the garden and have overseen its development over the past two years."

The area that they stood overlooking, a big square, had been meticulously planned and planted. In the centre was a big circular formation created by planting concentric patches of various colours of flowering plants. Many hues of Roses and lilies bloomed, creating an illusion of a Rangoli. Smaller patches of variety of white Jasmine were planted intertwined with beds of marigolds. The boundary of the big square was created with Bougainvillea of many shades – white, pink, purple and orange.

Rudra exclaimed "You did all this?! Samidha, you are truly gifted with an eye for beauty! Your parents must be very proud. This is like a little piece of heaven!"

As the girl glowed hearing the abundant praise, Vayu warmly added "This really is beautiful! I remember that one time you have started planting roses on your balcony... but this is a long way from those few potted plants."

"You must design something when you come to Sudhagadh! In fact, I know the exact area. There is a patch near my chambers." Rudra uttered with genuine pleasure, and then added in a playful tone "As you can imagine... it's the most neglected part in the palace. I would really appreciate it if you would weave your magic there!"

Blushing slightly, she eagerly nodded "It will be my pleasure!"

Leaving Rudra and Samidha chatting, Vayu walked down the steps. As he strolled through the perfectly symmetrical formation, he wondered – Is the methodically designed garden a result of Samidha striving for some sense of control and order in her own life. Or is it a reflection of who she truly is? Maybe she herself doesn't know, where her core self ends and where the layers resulting from circumstances and years of grooming for a role start...

His lips curved recalling the day Harinakshi had plucked flowers for him atop the cliff when they had gone riding. He couldn't imagine her creating and confining herself to something so artificial, anything so clearly manmade. Hers was a spirit that loved to run wild! My deer with claws...

His gaze hardened as he wondered how she would react whenever he was forced to share the facts about Samidha.

Soon, Samidha and Rudra joined him. The trio walked amongst the flowers as she pointed out some rare plants in the garden and shared how her father had acquired them for her.

Ambala, watching from one of the balconies, remarked to her sister-in-law "It's so good to see them together! Feels like a huge load has been lifted off my chest. I have been so worried since hearing reports of that woman."

The other woman nodded "Good thing we didn't let the news get to Samidha. It would have caused her anxiety for no reason. Maharani-sa, once our Samidha goes there... he will forget all other distractions."

"Yes... Vayu and Samidha have shared a good bond since childhood. I am sure, he will be kind to her." Ambala tried to boost her own confidence, even as some doubts lingered.

* * *

Sitting under a tree, on a hillock, Hari was taking in her surroundings.

To escape the unease itching under her skin every time her longing-filled eyes drifted towards the empty road approaching Dasi Mahal, early that morning she had announced to a startled Bansi that she would accompany him when he took the goats out to graze.

Though not lush green, the scene was serene. The goats nibbled at whatever clumps of grass or little shrubs they came across. A couple of the bigger ones, standing on their hind legs, were trying to reach the leaves of smaller trees.

But she had soon realised that her endeavour to not expectantly stare at the road from Sudhagadh had failed miserably, when Bansi had eagerly pointed out "Bai-sa, that in the distance is the main town area." After that, her eyes had been stuck in that direction.

Thankfully, Bansi, true to his name, had settled down against a boulder and pulled out a flute. Sheepishly, he had uttered "Bai-sa, there are too many of us in a cramped hut at home. I like to play when I am out by himself. Let me know if it bothers you..."

She had wearily smiled "Carry on... I could use some distraction."

That had been few hours back.

Whenever any of the goats started wandering away, Bansi paused the music and picked up a stick to nudge the animal back towards the area he wished it to be confined to.

Hari sat lost in thoughts. It has been eight days since he left. He had said seven days... why isn't he back yet? What if she has demanded that he must stay away from Dasi Mahal?? Will he really leave me? No! He won't do that! I won't let him!

Her breathing turned ragged, as some doubts arose – But what can I do if he does? Will my only option be - gracefully stepping back?? But why should I step back?! No, I won't give him up! I am his wife! With every right to be a part of my husband's life!

An overwhelming surge of gratitude for Chandrika coursed through her - Bai-sa always knew what she was doing... every demand, every instruction was meant to empower me for some such eventuality.

She was also thankful to herself for listening. But had it been the result of her trust in Chandrika? Or her instinct for self-preservation? Or maybe something even deeper.

She then started re-appraising some choices – Why did I insist that I didn't want his Churra? Had I let Bai-sa insist on it, would it have made my position in his life stronger? But then, I would have been stuck in that palace... under his mother's total control! And I would have been forced to follow all their protocols and never had a moment of peace to do as I please! Plus, it would have been much harder to see him with someone else in the palace. At least, here, I don't have to share him with someone else under the same roof... But what if-

"Bai-sa, shall we head back? The sun is high now, it will soon become very hot." Bansi's words roused her out of her harrowing musings.

To his surprise, she broke a sturdy twig and, removing the leaves,, started herding the goats along with him. The poor boy desperately prayed that word of this never got back to Raja-sa.

As they neared Dasi Mahal, he muttered "Bai-sa, I can manage from here on..." and extended his hand for her stick. As she relinquished it, she frowned – And now I don't get to control even the goats!

She had barely entered the courtyard when Neera approached. Looking very pleased, she started sharing "Bai-sa, I had gone to the village to buy some supplies, where I heard the news that Raja-sa has returned! The miller's daughter-in-law's brother works in the stables in the palace."

"Did he come back this morning?!" Hari's eyes brightened.

Shaking her head, Neera replied "No, they got back yesterday... I believe, late afternoon..."

So, he has been back since yesterday... and forget visiting... he hasn't even sent me a word! Hari retired to the dark, brooding silence of her chamber.

A mishmash of fears, uncertainly, anger, disappointment, and so much more prickled from under her skin.

* * *

Bhanumati watched Harinakshi with growing disquiet. She knew only too well how crippling the wait could be. After all, she had spent a better part of some twenty odd years waiting.

First, waiting for Raja-sa's arrival in Dasi Mahal. Always scared - what if he bowed down to Vaidehi's wishes and never returned.

Later, waiting in the shadows for few years while he was enamoured with the other women in Dasi Mahal. Luckily, they had never been able to engage his attentions for long, and he had always returned to her.

Maybe, his return had something to do with Abha too. After all the bonds of blood run thick. That little girl had owned a part of his heart in a way no other woman in Dasi Mahal ever could. He always indulged her little demands for sweets and dolls. Every time Raja-sa arrived in Dasi Mahal, Abha would rush to him, almost jumping on him. When Bhanumati had admonished her, Raja-sa had insisted that he loved her unadulterated adoration and that no one was allowed to scold his daughter. According to him – being with Abha allowed him to enjoy the simple joys of fatherhood.

In the beginning, Bhanumati had worried a great deal if the arrival of more children in Dasi Mahal might change Raja-sa's attachment to Abha and her.

But, for some reason Padmini and Sulekha had never conceived. And Tarika had miscarried many times.

Though Bhanumati had not played any part in it, Tarika had been suspicious of her after the first two times. The third time, Tarika had been extremely vigilant. She had stayed away from Bhanumati and cooked her own food. And yet, it had proven in vain. There had been a couple of more repeats of the same. With each loss, Tarika had lost more of herself too: lustre in her eyes, smiles, sway of her lips and her zeal for life. When there was only a shell left behind filled with bitterness, Raja-sa had stopped visiting her chamber.

Few years had passed in relative peace. Then one day, he had returned with Kasthuri.

Seeing a woman just a little older than their daughter, Bhanumati had been distraught, like never before. But Raja-sa had kissed all her tears away and assured her that all Kasthuri would ever get from him was his protection. Apparently, he had reached some understanding with Kasthuri. And true to his word, he never treated Kasthuri as anything other than a woman seeking refuse. Over time, his equation with Kasthuri has changed from indifference to one akin to affectionate, friendship. But it had never transitioned into anything that Bhanumati would feel threatened by.

Abha... where are you my sweet child? Bhanumati wondered if Vayu's men had been able to find out her whereabouts yet. When one of the men had approached her for information, she had struggled to share much. Apart from the last place and the ambassador's name that Manohar-sa has worked with then, she didn't have much of consequence.

It was just the wish to see Abha that kept her going these days. Otherwise, what else was left for her in Dasi Mahal?!

Once again, her eyes darted towards Harinakshi, who, despite the chance of Vayu visiting that evening, had made it a point to not dress up.

Shaking her head at the girl's stubbornness, the elder woman mused - She has a strong, defiant spirit. But to keep standing in the face of a strong Vayu, objects in the path must be malleable. Will she bend when necessary? Or will she, rather, choose to break?

Along with the defiance, another irrefutable fact shone bright and clear. Harinakshi was deeply in love with Vayu. When a queen arrives in Sudhagadh, her heartbreak will be bigger than mine. At least, when I came here, I was not the first woman in his life. I never, even for a moment, allowed myself to dream of being his only woman. But she has tasted that triumph and will struggle to swallow what might taste like betrayal.

Little did Bhanumati realise that for Harinakshi, Vayu's withholding the details of his engagement already tasted like betrayal.

But rather than bending, or breaking, she was all set for battle.

* * *

(Hi Dearies, 

Hope you are all doing great and looking forward to the holiday season. 

How did you find this part? While Vayu is away, I wanted to use that time to develop the characters of the women in Dasi Mahal and bring an insight into their history. Hope you enjoyed reading it!

Take care. Lots of love, May)